• Published 25th Jul 2013
  • 4,484 Views, 222 Comments

My Little Sharknado - Greenback



Twilight Sparkle and her friends must save Equestria from a deadly tornado filled with killer sharks

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The Battle for the Universe: Part 1

All was quiet above the Sharkicane.

Within the confines of Cloudsdale, Ponies, Zebras, Minotaurs, Donkeys, Nagas, and Griffons waited. The Sharkicane had gone silent, but the silence was more frightening than any roar. Though Celestia's speech had given them hope, the ponies and refugees were not immune to fear. Most silently clutched their weapons. Others stayed as close to their families as they could. A few went to the bathroom. One read through the latest issue of Rocks Monthly. But no matter what they did to distract themselves, all they could do was wait.

So they waited. Then they waited some more. And then they waited even more.

Nothing happened.

They kept waiting.

Waiting waiting waiting waiting waiting.

When nothing happened after half an hour, various sections of the city took turns going to play in the ball pit.

Standing atop City Hall, Celestia gazed out to the horizon. Now dressed in her fabulous golden battle armor, she was a beacon that everyone could look to for hope and inspiration.

“How long until we reach the anomaly?” Celestia asked.

Shining Armor peered through a telescope. “Ten minutes.”

Ten minutes...they were so close, and yet the Sharkicane hadn't attacked yet. Why?

“I'm bored,” the Naga Ambassador said. “May I go play in the ball pit?”

Celestia nodded, and the Ambassador leapt off the roof with a joyous whoop.

“Something about this doesn't feel right,” Cadence said. “Why haven't they attacked us?”

“They're probably waiting until we get close,” Celestia said. “Then they'll launch an overwhelming assault.”

Below them, the Sharkicane shuddered.

“Uh oh.”

Even from so high up, Celestia could see millions of individual sharks slicing through the clouds, as if circling prey. Other ponies saw them too, and quailed.

“Steady,” Celestia called out.

The sharks leapt higher and higher.

“Steady!”

Then the moment Celestia had feared finally came. From far in the distance, a small wave of clouds appeared near the anomaly, rising as it headed towards Cloudsdale. It quickly grew, growing in mass and strength until it towered above the city like a tidal wave about to crush a child's sandcastle.

The wave drew closer and closer. Thousands of sharks swirled within, roaring their fearsome roars.

Beside Celestia, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, and the monarchs readied themselves for battle. Rarity was fueled with rage at what the sharks had done to her sister. Fluttershy thought of Angel Bunny and her other animal friends being turned into sharks, using the rage to give her strength. Pinkie thought about cupcakes.

“Shining Armor,” Celestia said. “It's time. Sound the call.”

Shining Armor blew into Cloudsdale's fabled war kazoo, letting all of Cloudsdale know that it was time for battle. And throughout all of Cloudsdale, the city's defenders raised their weapons, trembling as the wave shot towards them.

“We will not run,” Celestia said, magically amplifying her voice so as to address everyone within the city. “We will not flee!”

The wave rose even higher.

“This is where we draw the line in the sand. This is where we say, 'no more!' This is where we say, 'Go away!' This is where we yell, 'Leave us alone!' And this is where we scream, 'Ahhh, please don't eat me!' This is where they will fall!

The city's defenders roared a battle cry. And beyond the shield, the wave of sharks roared in return, the Sharkicane's opening salvo finally reaching it's target.

The final battle for the universe had begun.

With a thunderous smash, the wave rammed the shield, the sheer number of sharks within blocking out the sun, shrouding all of Cloudsdale in darkness. But the shield held. Celestia fired her magic into the shield to reinforce it, an act that was soon joined by the other Unicorns in the city.

“Time to the anomaly!”

“Eight minutes!” Shining Armor called out.

The wave of clouds and sharks finally passed the shield and fell back into the Sharkicane, vanishing from sight. But no sooner had it vanished than another appeared and hammered on the shield as well. And then another emerged, and then another, until seemingly endless waves of sharks bit, nibbled and wore away at the shield.

“Do not give into fear!” Celestia shouted. “Stand your ground!”

The shield cracked. Beams of magic were directed towards it, and the crack vanished. But another soon took its place. It too, was mended, but then two more cracks appeared. And then two more as thousands of bloodthirsty sharks attacked again and again. With so many appearing, it was inevitable that one would slip through. And after a few minutes, one of the cracks fractured, then burst, and a horde of sharks poured into a park at the city's edge.

Shining Armor blew into the kazoo. “Attack!”

The Wonderbolts shot down from City Hall, the city's most powerful Unicorns riding upon their backs, all of them reinforced by the Griffon King and his reinforcements. They fired at the sharks again and again while foot-troops ran towards the pile, attacking while the beasts were stunned from their fall. And for the moment, courage, hope, and love overcame numbers, and the sharks were defeated. But for every shark that was defeated, two more fell to take its place.

Princess Cadence joined Celestia in firing her magic at the hole. But the sharks were coming in too quickly, making it impossible to close.

“There!” Rarity shouted, pointing towards another crack that was seconds away from breaking.

“Minotaurs!” the Minotaur Queen yelled. “Charge!” She ran down the slopes towards the new crack, her soldiers right behind her. The Zebra Monarch followed, along with his butler, the turtle doves, the gila monster, and the Breezie. They were all still en-route when the crack shattered, sending another waterfall of sharks into the city.

Giving up on the first hole, Cadence realized that their best bet now was to attack the sharks while they were still bottle-necked. But she was too far away to hit them effectively. There was only one way to get close enough in time.

“Shining Armor! Throw me!”

Shining Armor obliged by grabbing Cadence and hurling her like a javelin. “Go, waifu!”

Sailing above the city, Cadence fired her horn again and again, catching sharks in mid-air as a crack above her gave way, and another waterfall of hungry sharks poured into Cloudsdale.

Shining Armor watched, helpless to assist his wife. “Waifu!”

But Cadence saw the sharks coming and spun past them. Aiming upwards, she fired her strongest magical blast yet and managed to seal off the crack. But another opened not far away. And below, the sharks that had already fallen inside had now recovered from their plunge, and were flopping into the city in search of ponies to eat. But the barricades and their defenders were ready, and managed to hold them at bay.

Celestia kept firing her magic into the shield, trying to reinforce and repair it. Rarity joined in, as did Shining Armor. Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy headed down into the streets: Pinkie to lift everyone's spirits, and Fluttershy rallying the remaining wildlife to turn feral and fight against the sharks. But Celestia couldn't join them. She had to focus all her magic and energy on the shield; the longer it stayed up, the more time it bought them...but how long would it stay up under such a relentless assault?

Discord's magical orbs...should she use them now? The situation was manageable, but not dire. Still, it couldn't hurt to use one. With no markings to indicate what was inside, Celestia took a random orb and threw it, praying that it could the battle in an instant.

The orb broke open, and a flash of light shone over the battlefield, momentarily blinding everyone in sight. When it vanished, a giant crab stood upon the roof; spotting the sharks, it leapt off the roof and landed in the park. The nearby ponies hesitated, momentarily unsure if the newcomer was friend or foe. But when it's massive pincers snapped away in mighty crustacean fury, the ponies were glad to welcome their new ally, keeping close so as to protect it's weak spot.

Though surprised that a giant crab was actually doing pretty well against the sharks, Celestia didn't let her guard down. One crab wasn't enough to defeat millions of sharks...only one thing could do that.

Enterprise! Come in!”

***

Picard tapped his combadge. “This is the Enterprise.”

Captain, Cloudsdale is under attack! We're keeping the sharks at bay, but we need that nuke!

“We'll get it to you. Standby!” He hit his badge. “Geordi! We need that nuke, now!”

Almost done, Captain! We're interlocking the reduced-plasma conduit feedback loop coil! Give me ten minutes!

“You've got five!” Realizing that the Enterprise needed to be ready for combat at a moment's notice, Picard turned to Worf. “Worf, go to red alert!” In seconds, klaxons sounded, putting the entire ship on red alert.

“Decks twenty nine through twenty report ready,” Worf said. “Decks nineteen through...wait. Sir, deck eighteen is not responding.” A quick check revealed that it wasn't a communications error, nor was it the fault of the ship's systems. “I do not understand...they are not responding.”

His console lit up.

“Sir, deck seventeen just went dark!”

“Get a security team down there. Find out-”

A new alarm flashed through the bridge. Worf recognized it immediately. “Intruder alert!”

The console beeped, and a panicked voice came through. “This is deck sixteen! We're under attack! There are sharks on the-

A scream, and the channel went silent. Then the console exploded.

“All security teams to deck sixteen!” Worf shouted, running into the turbolift.

“Data, go with him!” Picard said. “Number One, lock down science lab twelve. We cannot let anything get to that nuke!”

Riker's hands flashed over the console controls. “Done.” The moment he was finished, his console exploded.

***

Deep within the belly of the ship, Twilight and Luna continued their desperate work with Geordi. Not even the flashing lights and sirens distracted them as they focused all their efforts on the silver case before them.

“All right, plasma matrix interlace relay ready to go.” Geordi said. “Now all we have to do is reverse the interlocking isolinear interconduit phaser display and amplify the energy signature while boosting the magnetic interlays.”

Luna stared at him. “What?”

“Basically, you and Twilight send magic energy into the Nuke, and we amplify it.”

“Ah.”

A nearby console exploded. Sparks flew from the ceiling as lights flashed red, and a bright blue energy field fell down across the walls and headed into the floor.

“What's going on?” Twilight asked.

“The bridge has activated a forcefield! Something really bad must be happening if they did that.”

“What does it do?!”

“It seals the room off completely. Nobody can go in or out. We only send it up when an enemy boards the ship, so they can't get anywhere they're not supposed to.”

Twilight immediately realized what that meant. If sharks were on the ship, and Spike was outside the lab...

Luna realized what Twilight was going to do. “Twilight, no! We need you here.”

“But Princess-”

“Spike will have to wait. All other things must wait! Even our bathroom breaks must wait! The sharks have somehow learned of what we are planning to do, and are trying to stop the Nuke. We must activate it, no matter the cost!”

Twilight wanted to argue, yell, and heroically rush out the door to save Spike. But deep down in her heart, she knew Luna was right. If they didn't get the Nuke going, there'd be no hope for anyone...but that didn't mean she was just going to sit around and do nothing.

Twilight hit her combadge. “Mr. Worf!”

This is not a good time, Princess. We-

“Spike is somewhere on deck...”

“Sixteen,” Geordi said.

“Sixteen! Please, send some of your soldiers to find him!”

We're heading to that deck. If he's alive, we will find him.

Twilight sighed, almost sunk to the floor in relief. “Thank you.”

Another console exploded.

“If we're going to do this, your Highnesses,” Geordi said. “It has to be now!”

There was no more time for doubts or hesitation. Standing side by side with Luna, Twilight fired her magic into the Nuke. Luna did the same, and together, the two shot all the energy they had into their only hope for survival.

“I'm beginning the amplification!” Geordi yelled. “Scanning for harmonic frequencies!” Then, to himself, he whispered, “Please, let this work.”

He was answered by an exploding console.

***

Worf's security team hurried down the halls of deck sixteen, their phaser rifles at the ready, trying their best to ignore the sprinklers that sprayed water through the hallways. At the head of the group, Worf adjusted his rifle. “Set phasers to stun. If these sharks are transformed ponies, we cannot kill them.”

Data and the other officers nodded, adjusting their weapons accordingly.

Reaching an intersection, Worf held up a hand, stopping the others. The corridors before them were wrecked, with panels ripped away and cables strewn across the floor. Cracked light panels flickered, casting deep shadows, and giving any nearby sharks countless places to hide.

“It appears that someone, or something, attacked the environmental control panel,” Data said. “That would explain the malfunctioning sprinklers.”

Worf tapped his badge. “Doctor Crusher, what is your status?”

We're okay, Worf. What's happening out there?

“I'll explain later. Gather all the ponies you can in sickbay. We're coming to evacuate you.”

“I will lead a group in search of other personnel,” Data said, and motioned for several officers to follow him.

He had only taken a few steps when a shark hurled itself through a nearby wall. But this was no ordinary shark: it was enormous, easily thirty feet long, but lacked solid teeth, eyes, or even skin, for it was pale blue and transparent, surrounded by a glowing aura.

“What is that?” one of Worf's officers said. “It looks like a...”

The shark turned towards Worf's squad and roared.

“A ghost!”

The ghost shark charged down the hall with frightening speed, it's mouth wide open. Worf and the others opened fire, but their phaser beams passed through the creature.

“Recalibrate phasers!” Worf shouted. If one frequency of the phaser blasts couldn't hurt a ghost shark, perhaps another could. But before any of his officers could move to do so, the beast hit the group. Only by diving to the side at the last second did Worf and Data avoid being ripped in half, which was what happened to the others.

Leaping up, Data jumped onto the shark, hoping to use a Vulcan nerve-pinch to incapacitate it. But he fell right through the beast's spectral body and landed hard. That gave the shark time to swerve and attack. A fast roll saved Data's upper half, but his lower half was severed clean from his body.

“Data!”

The ghost shark turned to Worf. And from behind him, another shot out of another wall, eager to join the hunt.

“Go, Commander!” Data shouted, his momentary shock at being ripped in half by spectral teeth now replaced by calm logic on what had to be done. “I will distract them!”

Worf had no intention of complying. One ghost shark had wiped out his entire group in less than a second; against two, Data wouldn't stand a chance. He would have gladly fought both ghost sharks in an honorable battle to the death, but the ponies still needed his help. The nuke, too, needed to be protected.

“Come, foul things!” he growled. “You may be fast, but you will never catch a Klingon!”

The ghost sharks charged, and Worf took off, his powerful legs propelling him through the drenched corridors of deck sixteen.

“Commander!” Data called out. But the three were already gone. Trying to go after them was pointless. Realizing that it was pointless to try and go after them, he dragged himself to the closest control panel and yanked the cover off.

Further down the corridors, the sharks were gaining speed as they chased after Worf, who leapt into a side corridor.

Data's voice came through the combadge. “Commander Worf, are you all right?

“Now is not a good time, sir!”

The ghost sharks quickly changed course and charged after Worf once again.

Commander, I must seal this deck. We cannot allow these ghost sharks to reach other levels of the ship.

Worf fired off a wild rifle blast. “I doubt a bulkhead will stop a ghost shark, sir!”

Hmmm...a valid observation. We must find another way to-

Worf blasted a portion of the ceiling into rubble, creating a temporary barricade between him and his pursuers. Sprinting down another hall, Worf ducked into the nearest room. Guided seemingly by fate itself, he had happened to run into the holodeck, where ponies were prancing and playing under the warm glow of the sun, and the singing of happy flowers filled the air.

“Worf!” Spike said. “Hey, I managed to get everyone here, and-”

“Everyone, out!” Worf shouted.

“What?”

“Now! We must flee!” He ducked back into the corridor. There were no ghost sharks in sight.

“But you can't leave!” a smiling flower said in a sweet, sing-song voice. “Stay and play with us! We have gumdrops and rainbows to-”

Worf blasted the flower into dust.

“Uhhh...all right everypony!" Spike said. "You heard him! Let's go!”

Worf heard ghost shark growls nearby. “Get to the medical bay!” Behind him, the ponies ran for their lives. Spike directed them until all had gone, and he was the only one left.

“Okay, we're good!”

The ghost sharks charged down the corridor.

“No,” Worf said, “we're not.”

Grabbing Spike, Worf shot at the control panel. He missed, but it still exploded, stopping the sharks ever-so briefly, giving the Klingon time to run after the other ponies. It was a short run to the med lab; Crusher and the other medical staff had opened an emergency hatch in the hallway ceiling and were helping the ponies through.

“Get inside!” Worf yelled.

Crusher shook her head as she shoved one pony above her head. “We haven't gotten all of them-”

The ghost sharks turned the corridor. Instantly realizing that glowing sharks were very bad news, Beverly slammed the hatch shut while the others got the few remaining ponies back into the medical lab. She was the last one in, and the doors slid shut as soon as she got in. Worf slammed down on the door controls, sealing the room.

“Worf to Captain Picard! Deck sixteen has been overrun with ghost sharks!”

Come again?

The doors bulged inwards.

“Spirits of dead sharks, sir!”

Beverly ran into the intensive care unit, and yanked open an access hatch leading to the Jeffries tubes.

Worf, I appreciate the attempt at humor during a trying situation, but now is not a good time for-

The Captain's voice was cut off by the sound of alarms blaring. Worf paid it no heed as he herded the rest of the ponies into intensive care, and slammed the doors shut behind him.

“Doctor, work fast.”

None of the ponies needed any encouragement as they ran into the Jeffries tubes. In fact, their size was an advantage, as they were able to run where their human counterparts had to crawl. In seconds all of them were inside, and the human staff followed, until only Beverly, Worf, and Spike remained.

“Well, this seems oddly familiar,” Beverly groaned as the doors bulged. “Computer, activate the EMH program.”

The air shimmered, and a man appeared. “Please state the nature of the medical emergency.”

“We've got ghost sharks trying to break inside. Distract them while we get out of here!”

The man frowned. “Are we really going to do this again? As I stated during the Borg crisis-”

“I know, I know, it's not part of your programming. Just do what you did then!”

As Spike, Worf, and Beverly climbed into the vent and slammed the hatch shut, the doors finally broke down. The two ghost sharks rushed inside, eager to find their prey. The holographic doctor looked them over with interest. “Starfleet has no files on the continued existence of deceased sharks, but your very existence seems to prove that there is indeed an afterlife. Are you sentient? Can you communicate?”

The ghost sharks responded by charging him, and learning that they couldn't eat a hologram.

“Apparently not.”

***

Onboard the bridge, every console flashed red. Tactical readouts went berserk, and Picard was in the center of it all, trying to figure out what was going on.

“Captain, the sprinkler systems have malfunctioned all over the ship,” Troi said. “And we're getting reports of sharks on every deck! They appear to be...ghosts?”

So Worf had been telling the truth after all...Picard couldn't waste time ruminating on such things though. Hitting his badge, he sent a message to everyone on the ship. “All hands, this is Captain Picard! We are being attacked by ghost sharks! Protect science lab twelve at all costs!”

Throughout the Enterprise, most of the crew heard Picard's voice, but couldn't follow his commands, as they were too busy fleeing for their lives. Every deck was a madhouse of screaming crewmembers firing their phasers and phaser rifles at roaring ghost sharks, only to discover that Starfleet's most advanced weaponry was all but useless against malevolent shark spirits.

Picard hit his combadge. “Princess Celestia, come in!”

There was no reply.

“Princess Luna, do you hear me?!”

Yes, Captain!

“Your Highness, we're under attack by ghost sharks! Where the hell did these things come from?!”

The sharks must have sent several of their own into the asteroids thousands of years ago when the nuke was hidden. Their ghosts must be trying to stop it from activating!

“How do we stop them?!”

I do not know; my sister and I have never faced ghost sharks before!

The turbolift doors buckled as something fought to get in.

Leaping from his chair, Picard grabbed a phaser rifle, turning it to kill. “Activate emergency bulkheads and seal the ship!”

Blast doors slammed down across the elevators, buying Picard and everyone on the Enterprise a few minutes. But inevitably, the ghost sharks would tear their way inside...and they had no way to stop them.

Data to Captain Picard.

“Data, where are you?”

Returning to the bridge, sir. I believe I've discovered how the ghost sharks are getting around. They first appeared when one of our sprinkler systems malfunctioned. I believe they require a source of water to get around. If we eliminate all the water on the ship-

“Number One, do it!”

Riker ran to the environmental control panel, but the console exploded as his fingers ran over the buttons. “Environmental systems are down! The only way to turn them off is from the environmental control room on deck eighteen.”

“Do we have anyone still down there?”

***

Within the Jefferies tubes, Worf's group had reached an elevator shaft, allowing them complete access to the ship's infrastructure. It was dark and silent, and momentarily free of ghost sharks.

“We must reach the bridge!” Worf said. “It is the most heavily defended room on the ship. We will be safe there!”

The ponies wasted no time in trying to make their way up the ladders embedded in the shaft. But without fingers, it was slow going.

Worf's combadge beeped as Picard's voice came through. “Worf, come in! We've found a way to stop the sharks! You need to head to deck eighteen and disable the ship's sprinkler system.

“Acknowledged! On my way!” Turning to Beverly, he said, “Doctor, I need you to-”

Beverly pulled out her phaser and made sure it was tuned to the highest setting. “Stay here and make sure they get to safety. Got it.”

Satisfied that one part of his mission was complete, Worf went to a ladder and started down the shaft. Spike bounded after him.

“No, Spike. You must stay with Doctor Crusher.”

“But I want to help!”

“You can assist the doctor in evacuating the others. A child such as yourself is not qualified to fight ghost sharks; I must do it alone.”

“No way, dude!” Vinyl Scratch jogged over, with Octavia following close behind. “No one goes it alone! That's not our way! If you're going to save the ship, you need some backup!”

“I appreciate the offer, colored pony, but-”

“Can you perform magic?” Scratch's horn gave a quick burst of color. “I know a few spells that might come in handy.”

Worf grumbled. “Very well. But you will do exactly what I say, when I say, understood?”

“Totally!”

Worf started down the ladder. Spike followed, but Octavia hesitated. “Vinyl, you've never fought sharks before!”

“Yeah, but I don't wanna just stand around and wait to be eaten! Besides, there's a first time for everything, huh?” She started down the ladder.

Octavia groaned as she followed the others. “Oh, I am going to regret this.”

It only took a few moments for Worf to descend to deck eighteen. Grabbing hold of the turbolift doors, he yanked them open and poked his rifle through. The light revealed another ruined hallway littered with broken lights and instruments, but there was no sign of any ghost sharks. Signaling that it was clear, he scrambled out. Spike, Vinyl Scratch, and Octavia followed him.

“This way.”

Running through the falling water, the group made their way down the twisting corridors, trying to ignore the sounds of combat and screams that were dangerously close by. It wasn't long before they finally reached the doors leading to environmental control. Going inside, they were confronted with several massive control consoles.

“Now what?” Octavia asked.

“I must deactivate the system. It will take a few minutes.” Worf looked to Spike and tossed him the phaser rifle. “You must stand guard.”

Catching the weapon, Spike grinned. “Yes, sir!” Then he ran outside, Vinyl and Octavia following, leaving Worf to tap buttons and commands.

Outside, Spike, Octavia and Vinyl stood their ground, glancing down the halls, on alert for the slightest movement or shadow dancing across the walls.

“Anything?” Spike whispered.

“No,” Octavia said. “I see nothing.”

Vinyl looked to the left. Her eyes went wide. “There!”

The others turned and caught a glimpse of a spectral shark tail.

Spike gulped, his finger tight on the trigger.

A roar caught all three by surprise. They spun to see two ghost sharks shooting right towards them. Spike yelled out and yanked the trigger; his rifle fired a laser at the sharks, but it went right through them.

“Again!” Octavia yelled.

Spike fired again and again, but the lasers kept going right through his targets. Beside him, Vinyl tried firing a few magic blasts. To her surprise, they hit the sharks, but only stunned them briefly. It wasn't going to stop them for long.

Hammering on the control panel for a nearby door, Octavia managed to get it open. “Everyone in here!”

“No!” Spike said. “We have to protect Worf!”

The sharks charged.

“Can't do that if we're dead, little dude!” Magically tossing Spike into the room, Vinyl followed, and the doors slammed shut behind them.

In the environmental control room, Worf kept pressing buttons and activating subroutines. The damage to the ship's circuitry was making his task more difficult then he had first imagined. He had heard the sounds of combat outside, but couldn't spare the time to see what was going on.

The combadge beeped. “Worf, hurry!” Riker said. “We've got five ghost sharks about to break into the bridge!

“I'm going as fast as I can, sir!”

Then go faster!

Sweating like a Grabtherian boar-pig, Worf hit buttons again and again as the console exploded.

Trapped within a small break room, Spike, Octavia, and Vinyl tried to figure out what to do. The doors wouldn't last much longer against the shark's assault, and there weren't any vents they could escape into. The only thing in the storage room was a good-sized machine in the back.

“Does anyone have any idea what to do?” Octavia asked nervously, backing away from the door with each subsequent hit.

Running to the machine, Vinyl Scratch looked it over. “Computer, what is this?” she asked, remembering how Doctor Crusher instructed her to ask the computer (whatever that was) a question when she was lost or wasn't sure what something was.

“This is a replicator.”

A replicator?! Wait, Crusher had told her about one of these...they could create almost any inorganic object...and she had an idea that was so crazy, it might work.

“Computer! Create a gun that has a high-powered sonic generator in it, like what you'd find in speakers! Crank up the power as much as possible, and make it so that it fires music blasts!”

The replicator swirled, beams formed, and what looked like a large, portable cannon popped into existence. Vinyl grabbed it; the weapon felt solid enough, and she could feel it vibrating from the subwoofers within.

The doors buckled, bent, and started to give way.

“All right everyone, chill out! I got this!”

Spike and Octavia leapt back as Octavia raised the cannon. The doors were torn apart, and as the ghost sharks rushed inside.

“Hey ghosts! Taste my wubs!”

Vinyl pulled the trigger, and the air was filled with the deafening roar of dance music. Everything made of glass or plastic shattered as the wubs hit the ghost sharks in mid-leap, blasting them out the room and into the hall. Vinyl leapt after them, and fired once more. At point-blank range, the shots blasted the sharks into scattered ethereal energy which quickly dissipated into nothingness, returning the beasts to the afterlife.

“That...that actually worked?!” Octavia gasped.

Vinyl pumped the air with her hoof. “Radical!”

The sprinklers finally went dry, and Worf emerged from the control room. “What happened?”

“Oh, the sharks got a taste of my bass cannon, that's all!”

Worf's combadge beeped once more. “Good job Mr. Worf. The sprinklers have been shut down.

“Are the sharks gone, Captain?”

The answer came a moment later. “I'm afraid not; they appear to no longer be as fast as they were, but they're still present.

Worf, Spike, and the others found that out themselves, as three more ghost sharks charged down the hall towards them in a final, desperate attempt to obtain ghost shark food.

Vinyl tossed Worf the cannon. “Here!”

Grabbing hold, Worf had no time to hesitate. He immediately took aim and fired, and once more the power of wubs blasted the sharks down the hallway and returned their energy to the grave once again.

For a moment, Worf said nothing. Then he tapped his badge. “Captain, one of the ponies has created a...”

“A bass cannon.”

“A...bass cannon. I can confirm that it can defeat the ghost sharks.”

There was a moment of silence on Picard's end. “Well, if it works, it works.” Picard's voice then echoed throughout the hall. “This is the Captain speaking. All personnel, go to any replicator and immediately arm yourselves with bass cannons as soon as possible. We have received confirmation that this weapon can harm ghost sharks.

Throughout the Enterprise, the crew was quick to obey, materializing hundreds of bass cannons from the ship's replicators. And in a few short minutes, the tide of battle turned in the Enterprise’s favor, for everyone onboard through the halls and rooms, blasting the ghost sharks into oblivion with the power of wubs. Finally, after almost twenty minutes of the most chaotic fighting in the ship's history, the last ghost shark was wubbed to undeath, and the Enterprise was safe once more.

On the bridge, Picard and the other senior officers breathed a sigh of relief. While the battle to save the universe was still raging, they had managed to survive the deadliest engagement yet.

LaForge here. Captain, we've got great news! We've managed to activate the Nuke!

“Excellent! And Geordi?”

Yes, Captain?

“Get down to Engineering and dump every last molecule of water from the Enterprise. I don't want any more ghost sharks on my ship.”

Will do.

The turbolift opened, and Worf, Spike, Octavia, and Vinyl Scratch entered.

“Excellent job, Mr. Worf.” Picard said. “I daresay you just saved the Enterprise."

“Thank you sir. But it was Vinyl Scratch who created the bass cannons.”

Picard went to Vinyl Scratch. “Well now, Ms. Scratch, it appears the crew of the Enterprise is in your debt.”

Vinyl Scratch blushed. “Aw shucks, Captain. It's nothing, really.”

“But it is. You just saved over seven hundred lives. Such an act is to be commended, and if we pull through, I look forward to reporting this to Starfeet. It's not often that a new lifeform helps to save the ship.”

Scratch blushed even harder.

Around the bridge, energy panels lit up, and in seconds all the water in the carpets, upholstery, and panels was gone, leaving the bridge bone-dry. And throughout the ship, all the water similarly vanished, leaving behind just the thin amount of water in the atmosphere, and that was nowhere near enough for the ghost sharks to swim through.

Picard's badge beeped. “Laforge here. I just dumped the water into space, Captain. Not a drop left on the ship.

“Good work, Geordi. Now get that nuke to the torpedo bay and launch it.” He tapped his badge. “Princess Celestia, if you can hear me, we're about to launch the nuke. Stand by.”

The bridge shook.

“Oh for heaven's sake, now what?!”

The shaking came again, much stronger this time. Consoles exploded, throwing several crewmembers across the room.

“Captain, the ship is under attack!” Troi said.

“What?! On screen!”

The viewscreen came on, revealing Equestria's moon, the asteroid belt...and hundreds of ghost sharks attacking the Enterprise's hull, all adrift in the water that had been teleported outside.

“Oh no...”

The bridge jerked violently, throwing everyone to the floor.

“Shields at eighty percent!” Troi called out as she clawed her way back into her chair. “Sixty...fifty! Captain, we're going to lose them!”

“Divert emergency power to the shields! Reconfigure phasers to fire bass cannon energy!”

Troi did so. “It's not working! Shields at thirty percent! Twenty...ten!”

An explosion. Consoles burst into flames, then exploded.

“Captain, we've lost our shields!” The sound of tearing metal echoed through the air. “They're attacking the hull! Structural integrity at eighty percent! Seventy!”

Outside the ship, the hordes of ghost sharks tore into the Enterprise's hull, their teeth making short work of the thick plating protecting the living from the cold void of space.

“Fifty...forty...twenty percent! Captain, we're going to-”

Another explosion cut Troi's words short, and blinded everyone in a bright shower of exploding consoles.

***

Enterprise, come in!” Celestia said. “Enterprise, do you read me?!” She had heard Picard telling her something about the nuke, but his message had been lost due to a garbled communication.

“Captain, please come in! We-”

With a shattering boom, the shield surrounding Cloudsdale finally reached its breaking point. No amount of magic pumped into it could keep it intact, and it finally shattered under the shark's unstoppable assault.

Celestia's heart almost stopped.

“No...”

Now free to gorge themselves on the ponies below, thousands of sharks poured into Cloudsdale, joining their allies below. And together, they swarmed over the barricades and buildings like living waves of flesh and teeth. The city's defenders fought back with everything they had, but they were quickly lost beneath the hordes. Even the giant crab was forced to retreat against such overwhelming numbers,

It was at that moment that Celestia realized that Cloudsdale, the survivors within it, and the city's awesome ball pit, were doomed.