Itty-Bitty Bite Size Stories

by gallagsp the corgi

The True Meaning (Easter Special)

Fluttershy trotted merrily through White Tail wood. She wore fluffy bunny ears on her head, (artificial fur, of course) and carried a small pastel blue basket with her. The basket contained colorful plastic eggs, and inside the eggs, was candy.

Fluttershy rather enjoyed this time of year, the warm weather, the bright colors, and all her animal friends came out from hibernation and their families started to grow. She really enjoyed Easter, or as it was called in Equestria, Bunny Day.

Bunny Day traditions were simple, color a bunch of real eggs with dies and paints for decoration, then hide a bunch of candy-filled plastic ones across town for the fillies and colts to enjoy. Fluttershy rounded a corner on the path, then stopped suddenly.

Two figures were standing in the clearing, partaking in a heated debate. One of them was a tall human with a beard and wearing a white rope. The other was... a giant bunny with oversized features.

"Look, Easter bunny," the human said. "I don't care about your traditions, you celebrate Easter all wrong!"

"Jesus, darling, you just don't understand! No one here in this universe has ever heard of you!"

"I died for their sins, and you make a mockery of it!" The two must have heard Fluttershy, for they turned to her, looking shocked.

"Um..." They both said.

Jesus took a deep breath and approached Fluttershy, kneeling down to be at eye-level with her. "Hello, little pony. What do you have there?" he said, pointing at the basket.

"Um... Bunny Day eggs?"

"I see. Well, did those eggs die for your sins?"

"What?"

"Were they nailed to a Cross by their hands and feet and left to die, before being stabbed, then were they buried in a tomb, only to rise out three days later?"

"I'm confused..." Fluttershy said, backing away.

"I thought not." Jesus said, standing up. "Easter bunny, I don't appreciate the way you disrespect this holy day, but I guess I can't change it." He turned away and waled down the path, fading away into the sunlight.

Fluttershy turned to the Easter Bunny. "What just happened?"

"Business..." The Easter Bunny said. "Me making tons of money and some self-righteous hippy trying to stop me."

Lightning struck a tree nearby, even though there were no clouds, causing Fluttershy to jump.

"I heard that!" a voice boomed from above. Fluttershy fainted.

Author's Note:

So its a day late... whoop-dee-freaking-doo.

I was raised Christian, and I still consider myself one, though I'm not a practicing Christian who goes to church every Sunday and reads the Bible, but even I know Jesus appreciates a good joke every now and then.

Obligatory Religious reference out of the way, thanks for playing.

Comments

[Pen Brush]

I thought it was funny, and I'm a Christian who goes to church on sunday. Jokes are jokes. *shrug*

[QPaysTaxes]

I'm not even Christian and I read the Bible... It's fascinating.

[GordonFreebrony]

4265654
Computing. Computing.

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[Weezil_Brony]

4249131 ...Lawdy lawdy, too much fimfic for one day...

[Weezil_Brony]

4247043 ...That's either an obscure television reference to a long-deceased television show on Nickelodeon... or something else.

[gallagsp the corgi]

4272805 Its a song.
This one here.

[Pixel Berry]

That was funny and cute

[BBkat]

real eggs with dies

dyes

While these are amusing and the short length makes it easy to go through them fast, they need proof reading.

[ArturQ]

4270259
I don't know why, but your comment reminds me of this
img0.joyreactor.com/pics/post/god-bible-religion-887525.jpeg
Atheist here o/

[QPaysTaxes]

4752315 That is hilarious.