To be honest, this chapter made me feel sorry for Diamond. I know it was her own fault in putting herself in this situation, but still for it to happen is bad. I also applaud Big Mac's actions. Definitely a gentlestallion.
Of course, now this makes me angry at everyone else. This barbaric action {listening in on them and such} is wrong and Applejack is the worst of them. (Wanting her to be hurt in such a manner. Ugh.) Meanwhile everyone's getting drunk and celebrating the event....Right outside.... Barbarians! I'm glad I don't live in a society like that. I'd probably beat the living snot out of anyone who dared put my little sister in such conditions.
3094228 It does make it hard to not think "Applejack, I am disappoint", eh?
I have confidence that things are going to improve, though. Even if it's only MacIntosh telling his sister what he thinks of her wanting to see his wife in pain...
based on what I saw of the foaling agreement and what she knows of the Diamond Tiara why should AJ think of DT as a member of the family. As I understood it once the foals reach a certain age they can both call the whole thing off
3094228 I took the concept from an old European tradition called a 'Roust', where the celebrating villagers would actually try to disrupt the bridegroom's, 'concentration' shall we say, by means of moaning outside the honeymoon cottage, knocking on the doors, loud singing of bawdy songs outside the windows and such. It was meant in good humor to test his 'amorous resolve' as it were. Yeah, DT has her detractors, but she may also have found a champion too.
3094911 Ah, I see someone has discovered one of the storylines of the second arc ... Having the will to move forward is good (DT), but one must also be ready to leave the burdens of the past behind and not chain one's self to them like Jacob Marley. (AJ)
3094256>>3095086 Thanks for the spare eyes you two. Oh, and regarding the fish, most don't, Dash might, ... But that's a different line all together, Greek myths and all, and she prefers not to talk about it.
3097260>>3097153 Good things come with time, I need to sort out some storylines and all. It's also gives me a chance to get to some back logged-other projects. One of which actually has bearing on characters in this one so keep an eye out, and of course thank you.
3098593 I really like AJ, actually but in some ways she'd the perfect foil for this piece because in a lot of ways she's just like Diamond, headstrong and no small part arrogant (the friendship letter she wrote to Celestia after the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000). The difference is in the show, AJ is shown to be a positive caring individual to her friends and family , while Diamond bullies the CMC along with Silver Spoon. Here, AJ's honesty just can't let her accept or forgive Diamond for her past deeds right now, and she can't really hide it either, so she comes across in Diamond's POV as very much the villain. I haven't written it, but in some ways Diamond is what AJ might have been if she'd stayed with her Aunt and Uncle Orange in Manehatten and not come back to Ponyville. What's worse is I think AJ actually sees it and hates herself for it.
I can't deny that AJ is honest and caring for her sis, but in this story, she's just antagonized so much to the point I actually don't like her. Even if Diamond managed to fix things with her, I know that deep down, I still wouldn't like her, at least in this story.
You did a good job at what you wanted to do, though, and that's what got my like and fav.
You deserve a hearty round of applause/hoof stomping :) This was great!
I expected some sort of heart to heart before they actually sealed the contract. Mac could clearly see something was still eating Diamond and tried to talk it out of her even if she couldn't admit it. Very well handled, this is a lot more complex than I originally expected
Faved and liked. Shame it can't be faved and liked again
“Don’t think my little quim is going to be as tight as your colt-cuddling buddy’s poop-chute?”[/quote
what's a quim?
You got caught playing your little wannabe Machneighavellian power games with your schoolyard foal’s rules and got played by grown ponies who knew how to find your weaknesses. I bet you’ve never even read The Prince have you?
Nice. *thumbs up*
“You admitted that there is something you care about more than your well being, something you’re willing to suffer through this ‘sham’ as you probably call it to preserve. I think it was power ya’ll were trying to hold on to. Whatever little scraps you can cling to, to let you keep your head up, to feel that you're better than others, to make them do what you want.
First of all. I love how from the start up to here [as far as I've read so far] Big Mac has Verbally Judo'd her and stripped her mentally bare. Was positively delicious.
now then. Did you mean preserve or persevere?
and was it suppose to be ya?
______________________
On your breeder question. One very important comment.
This is a world of magical, talking, candy colored ponies. Whose limbs have been shown to move in away that normal ponies can't. That and 99% of fics have them capable of doing like humans. So I doubt it matters how you have them make love. Mercenary ? Vanilla. Horse Mount? Can do. 69er? No probs. the 365 Sex Position Calender? Bloody Marvelous! The Karma Sutra? Absolutely Lovely! The only limit on sex is your imagination and how much detail you want to throw in. So go wild, go romantic, and most importantly have fun.
3130225 Quim - noun: (slang), vagina. preserve - as in: to save (something) I think my editor missed that as Mac shouldn't be using the informal, or erroneous plural. That properly should be 'you'. - Thanks -has been corrected-
3143369 Thank you very much. I intend to try to maintain the integrity of the story as it moves forward, and maybe snipe a few more of those 'clop fantasies' at the same time. Again, thank you.
3144009 Sorry it took me so long to catch up to this story. But you have differently earned a spot in my Fav welcome # 115. I was hoping to see What Big Mac's interaction with Diamond Tiara would be like. No not the Clop but how wound he deal with her lack of a better word "Bitchy-ness" I was really glad to see that he had great insight into her and was very kind heart but at the same time was firm, laying down the law up front an a sensible manner. He seems to understand her better then she thought and he is will to get more then just what the contract said out of her and I am not talking that in a Clop-ey or bad way. It seem to me that Diamond Tara would complement Big Mac well. The way he can go tit-for-tat with her. I see that it will be an up hill battle with Apple Jack Apple Jack is a mean Drunk! But it seem to me that you made Apple Bloom a alley. But I like the bit where you had Twilight wrap the lead around Big Mac's neck, good symbolism.
I can't wait for your return and I hope that you take your time I can wait.
3179688 I agree entirely, DT and SS are vastly under-utilized characters. I'm surprised you split them up as you did. Not that I'm complaining, it's good to see her grow into her own mare, and not just Diamond's lackey. I'd be interested in hearing things from her perspective. Hearing her opinion of the fate (however richly deserved) of her best friend. I also really like the way you've written Big Mac. Like the Freewing Alchemist P said, the two of them are a good match, at least the way you've written them. As I've said to others before, take your time, and let the muse guide you where she will.
One of the most carefully crafted clopfics I've ever read. Your Equestria is a fascinating, thoroughly realized place, with cultural elements as alien as one should reasonably expect from a race of sapient equines. Definitely looking forward to more, and I'll definitely give your other stories a look.
Comment posted by Sir Barton deleted Sep 11th, 2013
I liked this chapter. Quick note: Today, when your parent's lead you up the aisle at town hall -> Today, when your parents lead you up the aisle at town hall
I can’t respect a pony who can’t respect themselves, let alone others -> I can’t respect a pony who can’t respect herself, let alone others or I can’t respect ponies who can’t respect themselves, let alone others
To be honest, this chapter made me feel sorry for Diamond. I know it was her own fault in putting herself in this situation, but still for it to happen is bad. I also applaud Big Mac's actions. Definitely a gentlestallion.
Of course, now this makes me angry at everyone else. This barbaric action {listening in on them and such} is wrong and Applejack is the worst of them. (Wanting her to be hurt in such a manner. Ugh.)
Meanwhile everyone's getting drunk and celebrating the event....Right outside.... Barbarians! I'm glad I don't live in a society like that. I'd probably beat the living snot out of anyone who dared put my little sister in such conditions.
Looking forward to the continuation, should be interesting to see how Diamond fares at the acreage.
Found an erroneous apostrophe.
>gestate
i.imgur.com/bWQhK6X.png
Fantastic chapter, I loved the dynamic between DT and Big Mac.
3094228
It does make it hard to not think "Applejack, I am disappoint", eh?
I have confidence that things are going to improve, though. Even if it's only MacIntosh telling his sister what he thinks of her wanting to see his wife in pain...
Unless your ponies eat fish, their breath is bated.
3094228
exactly what I have been saying
3094911
based on what I saw of the foaling agreement and what she knows of the Diamond Tiara why should AJ think of DT as a member of the family. As I understood it once the foals reach a certain age they can both call the whole thing off
3094228 I took the concept from an old European tradition called a 'Roust', where the celebrating villagers would actually try to disrupt the bridegroom's, 'concentration' shall we say, by means of moaning outside the honeymoon cottage, knocking on the doors, loud singing of bawdy songs outside the windows and such. It was meant in good humor to test his 'amorous resolve' as it were. Yeah, DT has her detractors, but she may also have found a champion too.
3094911 Ah, I see someone has discovered one of the storylines of the second arc ...
Having the will to move forward is good (DT), but one must also be ready to leave the burdens of the past behind and not chain one's self to them like Jacob Marley. (AJ)
3094256>>3095086 Thanks for the spare eyes you two. Oh, and regarding the fish, most don't, Dash might, ... But that's a different line all together, Greek myths and all, and she prefers not to talk about it.
The only problem with this chapter, is waiting for an eventual continuation :D
Great work as usual. Really can't wait to see further chemistry between DT & Mac.
i can haz next chapter?
3097260>>3097153 Good things come with time, I need to sort out some storylines and all. It's also gives me a chance to get to some back logged-other projects. One of which actually has bearing on characters in this one so keep an eye out, and of course thank you.
You know, the fandom is makeing me hate aj...
Still, enjoyable story.
3098593 I really like AJ, actually but in some ways she'd the perfect foil for this piece because in a lot of ways she's just like Diamond, headstrong and no small part arrogant (the friendship letter she wrote to Celestia after the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000). The difference is in the show, AJ is shown to be a positive caring individual to her friends and family , while Diamond bullies the CMC along with Silver Spoon.
Here, AJ's honesty just can't let her accept or forgive Diamond for her past deeds right now, and she can't really hide it either, so she comes across in Diamond's POV as very much the villain.
I haven't written it, but in some ways Diamond is what AJ might have been if she'd stayed with her Aunt and Uncle Orange in Manehatten and not come back to Ponyville. What's worse is I think AJ actually sees it and hates herself for it.
Applejack must be punished.
Who's with me!?
3099010 You might want to read the comment below. But yeah, I made AJ an ass.
3099017
I can't deny that AJ is honest and caring for her sis, but in this story, she's just antagonized so much to the point I actually don't like her. Even if Diamond managed to fix things with her, I know that deep down, I still wouldn't like her, at least in this story.
You did a good job at what you wanted to do, though, and that's what got my like and fav.
3099046 Yeah I did kinda leave her with a PR disaster didn't I. Good thing she's got a more positive role in one of my other pieces.
3099082
I hope.
I also look forward to more of your work.
Keep it up!
3099092 Thank you and your welcome.
Also, Congratulations! You posted the 200th comment on the story. (Gold Star for You)
3099101
Giggity!
You deserve a hearty round of applause/hoof stomping :) This was great!
I expected some sort of heart to heart before they actually sealed the contract. Mac could clearly see something was still eating Diamond and tried to talk it out of her even if she couldn't admit it. Very well handled, this is a lot more complex than I originally expected
Faved and liked. Shame it can't be faved and liked again
3103172>>3103351 Thank you. Thank you very much.
3106968 So you read the author's notes.
3107040
And very interesting they are too, even if they are switched a little in the story!
3129792
Awesome sauce ! That was a little unclear, but now it makes more sense .
3130225 Quim - noun: (slang), vagina.
preserve - as in: to save (something)
I think my editor missed that as Mac shouldn't be using the informal, or erroneous plural. That properly should be 'you'. - Thanks
-has been corrected-
3131581
You're welcome. I'm sending you a PM real quick.
3143369 Thank you very much. I intend to try to maintain the integrity of the story as it moves forward, and maybe snipe a few more of those 'clop fantasies' at the same time. Again, thank you.
Poor Diamond, but it could have been much worse for her.
3144009 Sorry it took me so long to catch up to this story.
But you have differently earned a spot in my Fav welcome # 115.
I was hoping to see What Big Mac's interaction with Diamond Tiara would be like.
No not the Clop but how wound he deal with her lack of a better word "Bitchy-ness"
I was really glad to see that he had great insight into her and was very kind heart but at the same time was firm, laying down the law up front an a sensible manner.
He seems to understand her better then she thought and he is will to get more then just what the contract said out of her and I am not talking that in a Clop-ey or bad way. It seem to me that Diamond Tara would complement Big Mac well. The way he can go tit-for-tat with her.
I see that it will be an up hill battle with Apple Jack Apple Jack is a mean Drunk! But it seem to me that you made Apple Bloom a alley.
But I like the bit where you had Twilight wrap the lead around Big Mac's neck, good symbolism.
I can't wait for your return and I hope that you take your time I can wait.
Thank you again and good luck.
3179688 I agree entirely, DT and SS are vastly under-utilized characters. I'm surprised you split them up as you did. Not that I'm complaining, it's good to see her grow into her own mare, and not just Diamond's lackey. I'd be interested in hearing things from her perspective. Hearing her opinion of the fate (however richly deserved) of her best friend. I also really like the way you've written Big Mac. Like the Freewing Alchemist P said, the two of them are a good match, at least the way you've written them. As I've said to others before, take your time, and let the muse guide you where she will.
3181931 I did not write this it was 3144009 work I was commenting on it.
Never mind I read your comment.
One of the most carefully crafted clopfics I've ever read. Your Equestria is a fascinating, thoroughly realized place, with cultural elements as alien as one should reasonably expect from a race of sapient equines. Definitely looking forward to more, and I'll definitely give your other stories a look.
....... WOW.... That was incredibly intense and detailed drama. I'm really touched by this, somehow. Really touched.
I liked this chapter. Quick note:
Today, when your parent's lead you up the aisle at town hall
->
Today, when your parents lead you up the aisle at town hall
I can’t respect a pony who can’t respect themselves, let alone others
->
I can’t respect a pony who can’t respect herself, let alone others
or
I can’t respect ponies who can’t respect themselves, let alone others
dat heart filled chapter