Good fic, but...It's still bugging me that Macintosh is just okay with the whole arranged marriage out of nowhere thing. It's nothing really, but it bugs me.
You keep pleasantly high standard of writing. It's a remedy for my eyes (and imagination) really. And the nicknames for Twilight made me spit my coffee on my screen
2910193 Earth ponies of Ponyville always seemed very traditional to me. I wouldn't be surprised if marrige treaties were rather common occurance among them.
2911171 Just trying to get Scoots to come across as some what 'willfully oblivious to her own biology' tom-colt. Of the three CMC's Scoots still regards colts as having 'cooties' not that she'd say it out loud. That and she has probably never had 'the big talk' just because she won't sit still long enough for it. Well, I guess Sweetie just took care of that didn't she ...
So... ETA on next chapter? I'm actually pretty excited about this one, since the premise is one I've never seen before, and it is coming out great so far.
2911203 Thanks for the encouragement, chapter postings will be blogged so you can check there. Right now I have two other pieces on the run that I've been delaying, : so it will be a week or so ... no date locked yet. Watch the Blog though.
2910193 Mac's views on the arrangement will be addressed as the story progresses. His biggest personal burden is the focus of my other piece Mac's Tale.
2910659 Good grasp there. Though not much used in modern Equestria, I thought this idea of a contract marriage would work here to help launch this odd 'ship'. In my view most ponies are free to pursue their choice in romance , but occasionally these 'contractual' instances crop up, traditional Earth Ponies, and some Unicorn nobles in particular. This goes to my thoughts as to why Prince Blue Blood was being such a plotwad to Rarity. It's that he's playing the 'Game of Horns' and looking for the right mare to 'sign off on', look out Twi.
What I wouldn't give to see the look on her spoiled brat face when she realizes that their guest is none other than the big brother of her worst enemy. This should be fun.
Mister and missus Rich, after Diamond Tiara is informed of the details of your little arrangement, I'm quite sure mere alcohol will not suffice to shield yourself from your daughter's wrath.
Also: MacIntosh might be surprised to find what his bride-to-be hides behind her pretty face. Then again, he might like it...
2909469 I wouldn't. The above scenario implies 1 of 2 things. A) Ponies have made contact with Earth, or B) I'm somehow in Equestria. I'm down for it either way.
I'm intrigued by the idea here, but there's too much happening too fast, and the dancing-around-what's-going-to-happen would be more of a tease if the premise hadn't been given away in the story description.
Thus, when we come to the cliffhanger teasers, or the bits where we hear half of a conversation, it's less mysterious and more annoying because we know what's going to happen, so the build-up becomes filler. Again, it's less the fault of the story itself and more that too much is given away before we even sit down for the first chapter.
4392122 Originally, this was going to be a shorter piece. It kinda grew out of itself in some ways. But good to note and lately I have been thinking something like that myself, although the story did evolve slightly differently from where I started.
I disagree with the comment below mine regarding the cliffhangers; I love it when the audience knows more than the characters, making the cliffhanger more about what their responses will be (as opposed to a 'big reveal'). I'm pretty sure there's a literary term for that, but, of course, I can't think of it at the moment.
All of this was great, but it was the first part that got me laughing like crazy. The 'pathetic fallacy' of the cloud going over the sun was just perfect!
I'm so sorry it took me so long to get my teeth into this.
Heh, new chapter as soon as I finish reading the first.
Oh Diamond I will feel sorry for you once you find out.
Hey, Diamond,
You think Twilight is a troll? Just wait until your father reveals what's coming to you!
Also correction: "way to loose and argument mom" should be "lose an"
What Filthy said is certainly true; its Diamond Tiara who is wrongly adding up the information.
She is in for a rude awakening in a few moments.
2909003 Got it
personally if I had to marry diamond I would slit my throat... and i do hope you know I AIN"T kidding bout that.
Oh I am liking this premise. I can't wait to see a pregnant DT~
Also, just to clarify something, ponies in this fic are monogamous?
2909494 Your avatar is so appropriate for AB's reaction to finding out about ... well ... stuff going on.
Good fic, but...It's still bugging me that Macintosh is just okay with the whole arranged marriage out of nowhere thing. It's nothing really, but it bugs me.
Oh well keep up the good work.
>I couldn’t be more pleased he’s chosen to cover you for this.
>he’s chosen to cover you
I almost feel bad for DT. Almost.
You keep pleasantly high standard of writing. It's a remedy for my eyes (and imagination) really. And the nicknames for Twilight made me spit my coffee on my screen
2910193 Earth ponies of Ponyville always seemed very traditional to me. I wouldn't be surprised if marrige treaties were rather common occurance among them.
The vuljana.
Kind of like Voltron. The more things you can jam into it, the better it gets.
2911171 Just trying to get Scoots to come across as some what 'willfully oblivious to her own biology' tom-colt. Of the three CMC's Scoots still regards colts as having 'cooties' not that she'd say it out loud. That and she has probably never had 'the big talk' just because she won't sit still long enough for it. Well, I guess Sweetie just took care of that didn't she ...
2911198
So... ETA on next chapter? I'm actually pretty excited about this one, since the premise is one I've never seen before, and it is coming out great so far.
2911203 Thanks for the encouragement, chapter postings will be blogged so you can check there. Right now I have two other pieces on the run that I've been delaying, : so it will be a week or so ... no date locked yet. Watch the Blog though.
Ohhohho, Diamond Tiara!
You're in the deep end now!
*jawdrop* ....Oh, Diamond Tiara. You dun goofed, mare. XD YOU DUN GOOFED. XD Who the hell's gonna tap the Tiara's traphole, though? :P
2910659 Whoa! I caused a Spit take! Sweet Celestia's Stripey Socks!
My condolences to you computer screen.
2912379 to Tartarus with computer, I mourn the coffee
2910193 Mac's views on the arrangement will be addressed as the story progresses. His biggest personal burden is the focus of my other piece Mac's Tale.
2910659 Good grasp there. Though not much used in modern Equestria, I thought this idea of a contract marriage would work here to help launch this odd 'ship'. In my view most ponies are free to pursue their choice in romance , but occasionally these 'contractual' instances crop up, traditional Earth Ponies, and some Unicorn nobles in particular. This goes to my thoughts as to why Prince Blue Blood was being such a plotwad to Rarity. It's that he's playing the 'Game of Horns' and looking for the right mare to 'sign off on', look out Twi.
2912390
2909016My thoughts exactly.
What I wouldn't give to see the look on her spoiled brat face when she realizes that their guest is none other than the big brother of her worst enemy. This should be fun.
Pass the popcorn please, somepony.
Mister and missus Rich, after Diamond Tiara is informed of the details of your little arrangement, I'm quite sure mere alcohol will not suffice to shield yourself from your daughter's wrath.
Also: MacIntosh might be surprised to find what his bride-to-be hides behind her pretty face. Then again, he might like it...
2909469
I wouldn't. The above scenario implies 1 of 2 things. A) Ponies have made contact with Earth, or B) I'm somehow in Equestria. I'm down for it either way.
2914626 ok so I meant it more along the lines of if i was a pony and I knew DT like Bloom does.
2915149
Well, ifn thats what ya meant...it would be a very short marriage.
Sweetie Belle!
Excellent chapter, again! Very detailed prose, and intriguing to read
This will be interesting. She's kind of got it coming to her it seems.
I'm not 100% sure what comes next, but I'm betting she won't like it. Somebody gets her way a little too often, perhaps?
I'm intrigued by the idea here, but there's too much happening too fast, and the dancing-around-what's-going-to-happen would be more of a tease if the premise hadn't been given away in the story description.
Thus, when we come to the cliffhanger teasers, or the bits where we hear half of a conversation, it's less mysterious and more annoying because we know what's going to happen, so the build-up becomes filler. Again, it's less the fault of the story itself and more that too much is given away before we even sit down for the first chapter.
4392122 Originally, this was going to be a shorter piece. It kinda grew out of itself in some ways. But good to note and lately I have been thinking something like that myself, although the story did evolve slightly differently from where I started.
I disagree with the comment below mine regarding the cliffhangers; I love it when the audience knows more than the characters, making the cliffhanger more about what their responses will be (as opposed to a 'big reveal'). I'm pretty sure there's a literary term for that, but, of course, I can't think of it at the moment.
All of this was great, but it was the first part that got me laughing like crazy. The 'pathetic fallacy' of the cloud going over the sun was just perfect!
I'm so sorry it took me so long to get my teeth into this.
Sweetie Belle! is, awesome!