Your style of writing feels very tasteful and I like the way you build the plot without revealing anything and still not turning us away by being overly vague. I will definitely keep an eye on this
2898998 Big McIntosh is something of a mysterious character in the show. Background information indicates he is far more capable than he let's on, and is actually the financial brains behind Sweet Apple Acres ('Fancy Mathematics' and all). It's why I chose to use him as a lead character in my fan-fic portfolio. If you want to check out my take on Mac's Past please check out Mac's Tale for more background.
If it weren't for the fact that DT is the same age as AB I would have assumed that Filthy wanted Big Mac to sire him a child with his wife. Right now though, I don't really like the thought that essentially it appears that Filthy just 'gave' his daughter to a stallion already old enough to have children. And that said stallion seems perfectly okay with that.....
Regardless, it's too early to make any judgements and so I'll be looking forward to the next chapter.
2900640 I understand your concerns here. There is a reason for the warning posted in the long description.
The relations (physical) here are based on that of Equus caballus and Thoroughbred race horse breeding. Technically a filly can be covered (i.e. bred) in the wild as early as roughly one year old (human age equivalent 7ish) . In reality it is not recommendable for a filly to be bred before age 3 (human equivalent 22-23) and most often not before 5 years (human equivalent 27-29) when she's technically considered a mare.
For the purposed of this piece if it will help settle your mind, DT, AB, et al are probably 2 year-olds by Thoroughbred standards, old enough to do what is going to be required of them, and are in the 'apprenticeship' phase of Equestrian education (no little red schoolhouse), but still 'young'. As to Mac's age, beyond being 'adult' I never picked an exact one for this piece, if you need one to feel secure I'd say about 5-6, with AJ being by relation 3-4 ish.
By comparison Somthingroyal the dam of triple crown winner Secretariat (by Bold Ruler) foaled him at age 18 (human equivalent approaching 70!) and still was bred a few times after that living to age 31 (human age 100 roughly.)
2900812 Interesting, but you forget one thing that affect the rest of your explanation. The heads on these ponies are huge. When the heads of your average human became larger, the evolutionary response was to make the hips of women wider and for the time of pregnancy to be reduced from twelve months to the current 8 1/2.
This means that all children are born prematurely to a point, which in turn affects how quickly they would age after birth. This new aging rate is unpredictable and may range from the average horse lifespan but the show hints that ponies are able to live over centuries (Granny Smith's lifespan vs the length of time that Ponyville has existed).
2901437 You have a point of sorts, and I applaud your elocution of knowledge, I did take evolutionary anatomy so I can agree with your point on humans. Popular Pastel Ponies ... watch the season two episode 'Baby Cakes' the twins are born tiny but are crawling by 1 month demonstrating a very enhanced development, not to mention their heads seem bigger at one month than at birth, and to say 'Pinkie' and 'Pie' at the end of the episode would be something you'd expect from a H. sapiens sapiens at 11-15 months, not one month. The postnatal care requirements for these ponies do show more primatological biases vs E. caballus and related types. If you have more thoughts I'm here, or PM. Thanks for faving.
2900812 Me on the other hand, I wasn't all that concerned. Mainly since the nature of the show's characters leaves age and maturity a wonky concept anyway.
2901747 I mean, I COULD worry about things like "why isn't this really old character dead yet" or "why are these supposedly young crusaders riding down ropes in a death-defying dare" but... eh. And as long as it internally makes sense, and my image of these characters isn't shattered (which most fanfiction manages to stay true to) I don't mind them doing things that might be slightly "odd" if the story is told well.
Oh, and I forgot to say, faving and upvoting. Hope to see more.
I reckon Mac's probably some super smart guy. Got that intellect going on. This is a nice first chapter but, I think you know why here. Laughs and laughs galore. Although, this was pretty cool so I may keep up with it.
Excellently written, my friend! A few sentences ran on a bit too long and would need shortening for greater readability (Though I am the run-on sentence queen), but your descriptions are really wonderfully evocative! Great work!
Interesting. Mac seems so detached while talking about the clauses---for any other character, that would seem inappropriate, but I could just picture his face while going through it
Also, I like the bits of description you throw in; Mac's appearance and tiredness while working were especially striking. (Edited for grammar).
Irl I'm so against arranged marriages I can't quite put it into words, but I can suspend such dislikes and soldier on for the occasional fic. Well written so far, intersting to see how you handle it.
5673434 I'm not a big fan of arranged marriages myself. The tale here is based on Thoroughbred Horse breeding, and Southern US Antebellum family politics, with some lessons on friendship and family thrown in. There are some parts that may seem distinctly odd at times but I hope you can find it to reach the end of the tale.
This won't end well
Ugh. Cliffhangers... I sense a Big Mac pairing.
Well, this will be... interesting.
Your style of writing feels very tasteful and I like the way you build the plot without revealing anything and still not turning us away by being overly vague. I will definitely keep an eye on this
more please, i like this
you have peaked my interest good sir, i also suggest you join clop fics if this story has sex, will help you get noticed
I am rather curious at this point... especially considering Mac's eloquence!
Diamond made to have sex with an Apple? She'll hate that.
interesting
2896398
I try, and I appreciate your appreciation of those efforts.
Thank you.
2898998 Big McIntosh is something of a mysterious character in the show. Background information indicates he is far more capable than he let's on, and is actually the financial brains behind Sweet Apple Acres ('Fancy Mathematics' and all). It's why I chose to use him as a lead character in my fan-fic portfolio. If you want to check out my take on Mac's Past please check out Mac's Tale for more background.
If it weren't for the fact that DT is the same age as AB I would have assumed that Filthy wanted Big Mac to sire him a child with his wife. Right now though, I don't really like the thought that essentially it appears that Filthy just 'gave' his daughter to a stallion already old enough to have children. And that said stallion seems perfectly okay with that.....
Regardless, it's too early to make any judgements and so I'll be looking forward to the next chapter.
2900640 I understand your concerns here. There is a reason for the warning posted in the long description.
The relations (physical) here are based on that of Equus caballus and Thoroughbred race horse breeding. Technically a filly can be covered (i.e. bred) in the wild as early as roughly one year old (human age equivalent 7ish) . In reality it is not recommendable for a filly to be bred before age 3 (human equivalent 22-23) and most often not before 5 years (human equivalent 27-29) when she's technically considered a mare.
For the purposed of this piece if it will help settle your mind, DT, AB, et al are probably 2 year-olds by Thoroughbred standards, old enough to do what is going to be required of them, and are in the 'apprenticeship' phase of Equestrian education (no little red schoolhouse), but still 'young'. As to Mac's age, beyond being 'adult' I never picked an exact one for this piece, if you need one to feel secure I'd say about 5-6, with AJ being by relation 3-4 ish.
By comparison Somthingroyal the dam of triple crown winner Secretariat (by Bold Ruler) foaled him at age 18 (human equivalent approaching 70!) and still was bred a few times after that living to age 31 (human age 100 roughly.)
2900812 Interesting, but you forget one thing that affect the rest of your explanation. The heads on these ponies are huge. When the heads of your average human became larger, the evolutionary response was to make the hips of women wider and for the time of pregnancy to be reduced from twelve months to the current 8 1/2.
This means that all children are born prematurely to a point, which in turn affects how quickly they would age after birth. This new aging rate is unpredictable and may range from the average horse lifespan but the show hints that ponies are able to live over centuries (Granny Smith's lifespan vs the length of time that Ponyville has existed).
2901437 You have a point of sorts, and I applaud your elocution of knowledge, I did take evolutionary anatomy so I can agree with your point on humans. Popular Pastel Ponies ... watch the season two episode 'Baby Cakes' the twins are born tiny but are crawling by 1 month demonstrating a very enhanced development, not to mention their heads seem bigger at one month than at birth, and to say 'Pinkie' and 'Pie' at the end of the episode would be something you'd expect from a H. sapiens sapiens at 11-15 months, not one month. The postnatal care requirements for these ponies do show more primatological biases vs E. caballus and related types. If you have more thoughts I'm here, or PM. Thanks for faving.
2900812 Me on the other hand, I wasn't all that concerned. Mainly since the nature of the show's characters leaves age and maturity a wonky concept anyway.
2901739 Exactly!
2901747 I mean, I COULD worry about things like "why isn't this really old character dead yet" or "why are these supposedly young crusaders riding down ropes in a death-defying dare" but... eh. And as long as it internally makes sense, and my image of these characters isn't shattered (which most fanfiction manages to stay true to) I don't mind them doing things that might be slightly "odd" if the story is told well.
Oh, and I forgot to say, faving and upvoting. Hope to see more.
I reckon Mac's probably some super smart guy. Got that intellect going on. This is a nice first chapter but, I think you know why here. Laughs and laughs galore. Although, this was pretty cool so I may keep up with it.
Excellently written, my friend! A few sentences ran on a bit too long and would need shortening for greater readability (Though I am the run-on sentence queen), but your descriptions are really wonderfully evocative! Great work!
3187780 Thank you ma'am. It's kind of you to say so.
i.imgur.com/r4HGZt0.gif
Interesting. Mac seems so detached while talking about the clauses---for any other character, that would seem inappropriate, but I could just picture his face while going through it
Also, I like the bits of description you throw in; Mac's appearance and tiredness while working were especially striking. (Edited for grammar).
*reads big mac's line at the end* man, knew Big Mac was supposed to be highly intelligent (according to Peter) but wow....
That Fresh Prince reference.
Love it.
5494150 Comment No. 400 and it's on the first chapter of all places. Thanks.
But Fresh Prince reference? Did I include something I didn't notice? (Scrambled media brain syndrome here).
Irl I'm so against arranged marriages I can't quite put it into words, but I can suspend such dislikes and soldier on for the occasional fic. Well written so far, intersting to see how you handle it.
5673434 I'm not a big fan of arranged marriages myself. The tale here is based on Thoroughbred Horse breeding, and Southern US Antebellum family politics, with some lessons on friendship and family thrown in. There are some parts that may seem distinctly odd at times but I hope you can find it to reach the end of the tale.