Chapter 2
Twilight tried to hide a yawn that had worked its way out of her mouth: it had been a very tiring week. Day after day of bucking apple trees had finally caught up with her, so Applejack had given her the day of... sort of. Instead, she was manning the apple cart in the town square. It was just after 4 PM, and the Fall sun was just starting to dip towards the horizon. It had been rather awkward at first. The townsfolk kept giving her odd stares as she and Applejack set up the stall and the customers kept looking at her shabby old cloak as she served their orders, but she had pulled through. Now there was only one hour left until closing time.
There hadn't been very many customers today, but hopefully that wasn't entirely her fault. Applejack had mentioned something about some town tradition, running with leaves or something. All Twilight really got out of it was that Sweet Apple Acres was closed that day so she wouldn't get paid. She still had about 30 bits to save before she could order the winter gear she needed and even then it could take awhile to finally be made. At the rate she was going, it might not arrive before winter does.
Twilight let out a quite sigh before putting on a smile as another customer came up to the stall, 'Maybe I could get another job for a few days, just till I reach my mark... no. The farm work is too tiring to put any energy towards anything else. I'm fit but I'm no earth pony. I can't even ask for an advance since it's not like the farm is booming or anything. I'm surprised they hired me on as it is!' Twilight sighed again sadly and looked at the clock set up in the square.
As was usual in these situations, time seemed to crawl by slowly. There was still a half hour left and the square was deserted. The only ones out there were the other stall workers; and even they were closing up early. Twilight resisted the urge to do so as well, she might be a loner and a wanderer, but she took pride in always doing the jobs she got correctly: it was the only thing she felt she could take pride in.
She was now the only pony in the square, standing a silent vigil at the stall. She glanced at the clock again, 'Only a few more...'
“Hi!”
Twilight jumped, startled at the noise, before she looked at the bright pink pony in front of her... the pony that was totally not there not even two seconds ago. Twilight quickly glanced around the square again to confirm that it was empty and she wasn't just going crazy before she turned back to the pony in front of her.
“Oh, um, hello miss. W-would you like some apples before the stall closes?” Twilight put on a big nervous smile, not entirely sure the pony before her was real, or if she had finally gone mad.
“Nope! I'm not here for apples right now, I'm here for YOU!” The pink pony leaned in uncomfortably close, her eyes all big and shiny with the worlds biggest smile on her face, though it just looked incredibly creepy to Twilight.
“W-w-wha...?”
“My name is Pinkie Pie, and I know everypony in Ponyville, but I was walking by and saw the apple stall but no Applejack, or Big Macintosh, or Applebloom, or even Granny Smith! Instead I saw you and I've never seen you before and if I've never seen you before that means your new and if you new that means you haven't met anypony and at first that made me so sad but then I realized that if you were working the stall that meant that you have met other ponies, or at least the Apples family, so you were friends with them and that made me super happy and then I decided to introduce myself so that we could become superduperextraspecialawsome best friends!!!! So what's your name huh huh huh???”
Twilight had been slowly backing away from the overly enthusiastic pink monstrosity through the whole speech but Pinkie stayed with her the whole time. She ended up backed into a wall and cornered.
“O-oh um, m-my name is Tw-twilight Sparkle, u-um... hi?
This seemed to be the right, or wrong, depending on how you look at it, thing to say as the pink mare got a wild glint in her eye as she took a huge breath of air and launched into a long rambling speech that came out too fast for Twilight to make any sense of. Something about... bananas?... and rainbows?... she heard the word cupcake and maybe sugar in there multiple times... at least she thought she did. Twilight wasn't sure how much more of this she could take.
DING...
DING...
DING...
DING...
DING!
Salvation!
“Oh would you look at that!” Twilight yelled loudly over Pinkie's rant. “Work day's over! I've got to get the stall back to the farm now! I'd loved to stay and chat but got to go!”
Twilight back ran to the stall, kicked the wheel jack, slipped into the harness and ran as fast as she could go.
Pinkie watched as Twilight fled, sadly wondering what went wrong as she mentally went over her meet-a new-pony-make-a-new-friend check list before giving out a loud gasp: she had forgotten the break out into a random song part! How could she forget that, it was her favorite!
'There's only one way I could possibly make up for such a terrible mistake... a PARTY! But I'm going to need help if I want it done in time...'
Pinkie turned and charged out of the square like a mare with a mission yelling her war cry...
“RAINBOW DASH!!”
---VVV---
Twilight slowed to a stop off to the side of the road and slipped out of the harness. After one last look to make sure Pinkie hadn't chased after her; she let out a sigh of relief. After resting for another minute, Twilight slipped back into the harness and continued on her way at a much slower pace. It was still a beautiful day out and she wanted to enjoy it before the sun set.
'Besides,' she thought 'Applejack won't mind if I take the longer way back.'
---VVV---
“Ya wanna throw Twi a welcome party?” Applejack quirked an eyebrow at her giddy pink companion. “Ya do realize she's been here for 'bout two an a half week now, right sugarcube?”
“WHAT?!” Pinkie gasped in shock. “She's been here THAT long? How have I not met her before? Why didn't anypony tell me? THE PARTY IS SOOO LATE NOW!!!”
“Well I can't rightly say,” Applejack tapped a hoof to her chin thoughtfully. “She told me that she's been stay a somepony's house in Ponyville, but won't say who.” Applejack shrugged, “But then, Twi's not exactly what you'd call a social pony.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean for as long as she's been here I've been able to really talk ta her maybe three times. Everything else is 'yes ma'am' this or 'no ma'am' that. All I really know bout the girl is that she's always wearin that old cloak a her's, reads that book she carries round with her whenever she can, that she's stronger than most unicorns, an that she always finishes what she starts. Oh an that she doesn't use 'er magic. Ever.”
“Huh?” Pinkie tilted her head quizzically, “What do you mean by those last two?”
“Just what I said. It's sort of a tradition on the farm to start the new workers with more than they should rightly be able ta handle. Weeds out the ones who don't really want ta work here an just want the bits. But she took that heavy load an finished it, worked straight through her breaks an well past when Mac an me ended for the day, but she got it done. An she hasn't used any magic at all any time she's been here. Never told her not to or nothin, wouldn't mind at all if she did.” Applejack paused as a thought occurred to her, “Speakin of Twi, She really should be back by now...”
“She left with the stall in a big hurry earlier like something was chasing her, but I didn't see anything... What if she was attacked by ninjas!!”
“Never mind, I think I know what happened.” Applejack drawled as she gave Pinkie a lidded stare. “Either way she'll be back soon, how'll ya get the party set up before she gets here? She never stays after works done, no matter how many times we invite her ta dinner.”
“No worries about that! We just need to clear an area in the barn real quick so we can set it up once Rainbow Dash gets here with the decorations! I didn't have time to invite anypony so we don't need to clear that big of an area.”
“Well if we're gonna do this lets get started.” Applejack pushed open the barn door and walked inside followed by a bouncing Pinkie Pie... followed not a minute later by a rainbow streak, which was then followed by a muffled crash.
“Gosh darn-it Dash! Learn ta brake would ya!”
---VVV---
The sun was just setting as Twilight plodded up to the barn and slipped out of the harness. She looked around but didn't see Applejack or Big Macintosh anywhere, so she shrugged and pushed the apple stall into its spot by the barn and grabbed the leftover apples in a basket to put away in the barn.
“giggle”
Twilight stopped just as she was about to push open the barn door. She lowered the basket and pressed her ear to the door. Voices came through, too muffled to tell what they were saying, but too happy sounding to be work related. Carefully, she nudged the door open a crack and peered through. There was Applejack setting up an old record player, that Pinkie Pie was there too, along with a blue pegasus with a rainbow mane, setting up decorations in the spaces available. Big Mac was there too, pushing some hay bales out of the area to make more room.
'Wonder what they're going to celebrate,' Twilight softly closed the door, careful not to disturb them. 'That leaf running thing isn't for two more days... is it somepony's birthday?' She pushed the basket of leftovers to the side so it wouldn't be in the way. 'That'll be fine until tomorrow.' She quietly walked over to her old saddle bags and slipped them on, tightening the belt with her teeth. With a silent “goodnight” she started off toward her cave lodgings.
“You know that party in there is for you, right?”
Surprised, Twilight jumped slightly and looked back to see the blue pegasus from before hovering lightly at the open door to the barn, the light spilling out onto the ground below. The pegasus was giving her an expectant look.
“What do you mean?” Twilight whispered. “As nice as the Apple family is they wouldn't just throw a party for no reason, and I don't even know you or the pink one. How could it possibly be for me?”
“It was Pinkie's idea.” The blue mare landed on the ground and walk a few steps towards Twilight. “She was pretty broken up that you ran away from her earlier, so she wants to throw you this party as a I'm sorry/welcome to Ponyville thing. I'm Rainbow Dash by the way.” Rainbow Dash waved a hoof in greeting.
Twilight just stood there, dumbfounded, her thoughts in complete disarray. 'A party?... for... me? No pony's ever... why would they...? Could they really......?'
'no'
'NO'
'I... I have to stay strong. I'll be leaving all too soon, getting attached will just make it painful for... for everypony... I've got to get out of here...'
Rainbow Dash flinched in shock as tears started to run down Twilight's cheeks.
“H-hey...” Rainbow Dash reached out with a hoof to Twilight.
Twilight pulled her hood over her head.
“...Sorry.”
And with that, she was gone, bolting down the road into the night. Rainbow Dash thought about chasing after her, but she was no good with emotional mares. Instead she turned back to the barn. Somepony had to break the news to Pinkie. She walked back to the barn door, dreading the coming conversation.
“Dashie I thought you were getting the plates from the house!” Pinkie cried out as Rainbow Dash walked back into the barn. “Hurry! She could be here any second now!
“Sorry Pinkie Pie,” Rainbow Dash lowered her head. “Party's cancelled. The guest of honor just ran away.”
“...what...?” Pinkie's voice came out softly. She came down onto all fours from where she was hanging some confetti, her mane seeming to loose some of its puffiness.
“I saw her peek her head in earlier and gave the excuse with the plates to go check it out. When I got out there she was already packed up and leaving. When I tried to explain and invite her in, she just...” Rainbow Dash sighed. “She just started crying and ran away.”
Pinkie just plopped down where she was, her mane totally deflated with the sound of a popped balloon, a look of complete sorrow on her face. Apple jack and Big Mac looked on as the happy occasion turned sour in an instant. Apple jack turned to her big brother.
“I'm really start'n ta worry bout that filly.”
“Eeeyup...”
---VVV---
Twilight had calmed down by the time she reached her cave, convinced that she had made the right choice. For once she was glad she didn't have work for the next two days, tomorrow being the day of the week they always had off, and the that leaf run or whatever: it would be a nice little buffer to this fiasco. Dropping her saddle bags and collapsing onto her bed of straw and grass, Twilight closed her eyes. What had been a peaceful day had turned hectic and emotionally draining, all she wanted now was sleep.
“ggggrrrrrrrrr”
That is, until she heard THAT! Jumping back to her hooves in an instant, Twilight turned to face the darkest part of the cave, where the growl had originated. What she saw was a pair of glowing green reptilian eyes, watching her from the darkness.
“gggGRRRRRRR!”
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Hello Spike.
New chapter
Oh sweet Celestia, that cliffhanger
New Chapter!
WOO. UPDATED!!!
Keep it going, this is an interesting story.
Yes, a new chapter!.
I feel so bad for the Twilight of this story. 
Also, if its possible, please update it more. The time between chapters 1 and 2 was too long. If.you cant, dont sweat it.
inb4 Spike.
3 words:
I .......... AM ............. HOOKED!!
It was still a beautiful day ouApplejack won't mind if I take the longer way back.'t and she wanted to enjoy it before the sun set for the day.
'Besides,' she thought 'Applejack won't mind if I take the longer way back.'
Bit of a typo in the middle of that sentance up there, otherwise a good chapter
It was still a beautiful day ouApplejack won't mind if I take the longer way back.'t and she wanted to enjoy it before the sun set for the day.
'Besides,' she thought 'Applejack won't mind if I take the longer way back.'
^Found a frankenstein'd section^
That aside, this chapter was great. Introduced Twilight to Pinkie and Rainbow, roused some suspicion from Applejack, and put Twilight in danger as a cliffhanger. I'd be lying if I said I'm not hoping for a bit more 'meat' in the next chapter, though.
Got to be Spike, but if she wasn't the one to hatch him, or maybe she did like last time and he never got his size changed back. But if she didn't, then maybe he hatched on his own outside of the school earlier than normal, and he's grown. Either way, I think he's going to be bigger than he is in the show.
296865 i would love but, reality sucks, i had this all planned out two weeks ago but couldn't find the time to type it out till today
296941 there fix it
296991 there is no advanced magic school so spike's origin is pretty different which i'll get into next chapter
297025 Right, that's what I was figuring. With no magic school to hold onto his egg (and the popular theory that it hadn't hatched already because it had been treated to not do so by magic) his circumstances would be completely different. Can't wait to see what you do with it.
Hmmm... I forgot what this story was about, but an e-mail alert means I liked it at one point! Re-read chapter one, read chapter two. Ah, time is relative it would seem. I liked it at one point, but this point as well... Is there even really "points" in time? Hm...
Ramblings aside, the premise is great, unique as far as I can tell, and your execution is good so far. Pacing is spot-on -- so far -- and the content is the perfect pre-plot-heavy-intro-buffer. The only problem is the occasional misspelling or grammar issue... Which will be detailed in a later comment. Prepare your English.
Underline is a change
Underlined italics is a removal
I had notes explaining my changes, but because V and W are next to each other on my keyboard and I'm typing in the dark, I accidentally hit ctrl-W, which closes the current tab. Lost all the work I had done. Angry. Was almost 3/4 done... Sorry, but no notes xD
of her mouth: it had been a very tiring week.
up with her, so Applejack had given her the day off... sort of.
Instead, she was mareing (Lol...) the apple cart
after 4 PM (Removed "now"), and the Fall sun
It had been rather awkward at first. The townsfolk kept giving her odd stares as she and Applejack set up the stall, and
Now there was only one hour left until closing time.
She still had about 30 bits to save before she could order the winter gear she needed, and even then it could take awhile to finally be made. At the rate it was going so far, it might not arrive before winter did.
I'm surprised they hired me on as it is!'
The only other ponies out there were the other stall workers (removed comma, comma splice) and even they were closing up early. Twilight resisted the urge to do so as well. She might be a loner and a wanderer, but she took pride in always doing the jobs she got correctly: (colon in place of the period) it was the only thing she felt she could take pride in.
She was now the only pony in the square, standing a silent vigil at the stall. She glanced at the
Twilight jumped, startled at the noise, before she looked at the bright pink pony in front of her... the pony that was totally not there not even two seconds ago. Twilight quickly glanced around the square again to confirm that it was empty and she wasn't just going crazy before she turned back to the pony in front of her.
Twilight put on a big nervous smile, not entirely sure if the pony before her was real, or she had finally gone mad.
Twilight had been slowly backing away from the overly enthusiastic pink monstrosity through the whole speech, but Pinkie stayed with her the whole time. She ended up backed into a wall and cornered.
“O-oh um, m-my name is Tw-twilight Sparkle, u-um... hi?
This seemed to be the right, or wrong, depending on how you look at it, thing to say as the pink mare got a wild glint
and maybe sugar in there multiple times... at least she thought she did.
Twilight back ran to the stall, kicked the wheel jack, slipped into the harness and ran as fast as she could go.
Pinkie watched as Twilight fled, sadly wondering what went wrong as she mentally went over her meet-a new-pony-make-a-new-friend check list before giving out a loud gasp: (colon) she had forgotten the break out into a random song part! How could she forget that, it was her favorite!
---VVV---
After one last look to make sure Pinkie hadn't chased after her (removed comma, comma splice) she let out a sigh of relief. It was still a beautiful day out and she wanted to enjoy it before the sun set. (Removed "for the day")
---VVV---
“Ya wanna throw Twi a welcome party?” Applejack quirked an eyebrow at her giddy pink companion. “Ya do realize she's been here for 'bout two an a half week now, right sugarcube?”
“Well I can't rightly say,” Applejack tapped a hoof to her chin thoughtfully. “She told me that she's been stay a somepony's house in Ponyville, but won't say who.”
that she's stronger than most unicorns, an that she always finishes what she starts. Oh an that she doesn't use 'er magic. Ever.”
An she hasn't used any magic at all any time she's been here. Never told her not to or nothin, wouldn't mind at all if she did.”
but I didn't see anything... What if she was attacked by ninjas?!”
“No worries about that! We just need to clear an area in the barn real quick so we can set it up
“Well if we're gonna do this lets get started.” Applejack pushed open the barn door and walked inside followed by a bouncing Pinkie Pie... Followed not a minute later by a rainbow streak, which was then followed followed by a muffled crash.
---VVV---
Twilight stopped just as she was about to push open the barn door.
Carefully, she nudged the door open a crack and peered through. There was Applejack setting up an old record player, that Pinkie Pie was there too, along with a blue pegasus with a rainbow mane setting up decorations in the spaces available.
With a silent “goodnight” she started off toward her cave lodgings.
Surprised, Twilight jumped slightly and looked back to see the blue pegasus from before hovering lightly at the open door to the barn, the light spilling out onto the ground below.
“As nice as the Apple family is they wouldn't just throw a party for no reason, and I don't even know you or the pink one. How could it possibly be for me?”
The blue mare landed on the ground and walk a few steps towards Twilight.
Twilight just stood there, dumbfounded, her thoughts in complete disarray.
'I... I have to stay strong. I'll be leaving all too soon, getting attached will just make it painful (removed an extra "for") for everyone...
And with that, she was gone, bolting down the road into the night.
“...what...?” Pinkie's voice came out softly. She came down onto all fours from where she was hanging some confetti, her mane seeming to loose some of its puffiness.
---VVV---
Twilight had calmed down by the time she reached her cave, convinced that she had made the right choice. For once she was glad she didn't have work for the next two days, tomorrow being the day of the week they always had off, and the that leaf run or whatever: it would be a nice little buffer to this fiasco.
I mean no offense, but I just wanted to point those out. We can always get better :D
fantastic
to be honest i kind of forgot this existed till now...
oh well second chapter didn't dissappoint, meet RBD aand pinkie, Twi runes away because she's afraid her secret will get out
(can't wait to see how they react to that nugget) and spike.
If you can fnd the time please update this quickly.
I put this on my track list but I didn't read it until I saw a second chapter had been posted... to be honest for a while I had wondered if the story had been abandoned.
You have a really interesting premise and story so far. The technical writing side has a few errors which others have already pointed out.
Keep writing them and I will keep reading them. So far, this has my attention piqued.
some errors here and there, but good all the same
keep em coming friend
that is all
kthanxbai
297619 Thanks for that, I'm surprised i missed all those mistakes. i do have a proof reader but he has been going crazy on a video game for weeks now and i didn't want to wait to post the chapter any more since its only been two and 1/2 weeks and already people are forgetting my story even exists.
304092
Not a problem at all. Like I said, the premise for this story is unique as far as I know. Therefore, I'm glad I could help. Just wish I hadn't fudged the first run-through... It was so much more thorough and had my reasoning/misgivings explained as well as I could. Don't worry, I won't forget your story again~ Besides, one look at the description and I said "AH HA! It's that fic! ... What was chapter one again?" I just have horrible memory
"her eyes all big and shiny with the worlds biggest smile on her face, though it just looked incredibly creepy the Twilight."
Mistake there.
Mistakes aside this story is amazing! Please get the next chapter out quick I can't stand cliffhangers!
304092 eh heh if its not to much trouble i'm on here all the time and wouldnt mind trying to help with any errors or mistakes that is if ya dont mind.
any way i love this story if'n your interested just respond k i'm willing to proofread and help seeing as i have usually plenty of time due to my semi insomnia lol. hope fully proofreader is the only thing slowing ya down eh lol.
also i've been trying to write a story down for a bit but it might be just a tad on the verbose side of things eh heh
anyway so yeah love this story ...blahblahblah o and dont forget
ya have a nice day ya hear.
best part sadly was twilight runin like she was bein chased by a banshee
or a broken pinkie promis.
New Chapter? Soon?
320996 Soon. I hope to have it all planned out and to start typing friday, reality pending.
dis'll be
awsome cant wait for the next chapter
is that soo bad?
maybe not.
Just to let you know I'm still hoping for the next chapter, this story has allot of potential and I would hate to see it die.
Not that you should rush a good thing I have seen what that does... it's not pretty.
420370It's not dying, i'm just late getting it out because of the end of the school year rush. The story will be finished, it just might take a while, but not too long, the next chapter is about 60% done.
421297it'll be great to see the next chapter when it comes out.
this story... is one of the best things i've read sofar on fimfiction keep it up.
and hopefully finals go well for you i know what thats like so are the finals high school or college? 
The fans demand more! Please! Whenever your done of course, just letting you know this awesome story has me totally hooked and curious as to what comes next.
Please say you are still working on this. Love the story.
hay twi when do you plan on your next update?
being patient is so hard
especially when waiting on a story with these levels of awsome.
Bump <3
i do hope this story isn't canceled or dead. hay twi whats you plan for it?
Please update
It's an very interesting concept.
Y U NO UPDATE???
sorry sorry everypony, i haven't had very much time on my hands lately
... but i have a good excuse! i recently rescued a 6 week old kitten
and taking care of her has really been eating up my life. but in appreciation to all u loyal readers i'm planning a double length chapter due by the end of next week, pinkie promise
hay twi? do you plan on having the chapter out any time soon?
This story has such potential, it would be a shame to see it die. At the risk of making the next chapter even later than it already is, you may want to seek a second proofreader. While there were no misspelled words, there were many instances of misused words. That said, I hope you find the time to update soon.
I'm am going to find you. And you are going to continue writing this.
I hate cliff hangers
Plz twi get a new chapter out PLZ 
I hope you plan on updating this again soon! Want moar!
say twi is the story dead?
or are you actually working on the next chapter?
This is one of the fics that got me started on fanfiction.
Moar. 'Nuff said.
update please!
hoping for an update soon