A 30 minute challange
Who knows what thoughts babies have as they sit in their corners, playing with their toys and giggling away. Now we see what Pound Cake, son of Mr and Mrs Cake and twin to Pumpkin Cake, thinks.
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devil001
Joined 6th Dec, 2012 ·
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Pound Cake an evil mastermind? I find this highly amusing in ways I cannot begin to describe.
Some kids say the darndest things.
Lay off the Family Guy.
I like it too.
2876697 Oh I can't believe I didn't spot the reference to Stewie Griffin. I feel so stupid.
I think this goes darker than Stewie and Louis Griffin, I think in the demon possession area.
This fic is so random. I took the challange to read it looking for obvious mistakes and what I think could be improved in 5 minutes.
All I found was few repetitions, whenever this little pony was complaining about his body he could have used different phrases instead of damning this puny body 4-5 times.
He could have compained why his limbs are so frail and why does he need to sleep so much and that sleep is for the weak for better variation and richness of expressions.