• Member Since 13th Jul, 2013
  • offline last seen Jun 5th, 2014

wolvenfire86


T

Starswirl Academy is now under new management. This is a taste of what the original game was originally going to be like.

It is the unfinished story of a young man as he learns about the unfair truths of growing up, and an unlikely friendship between an Egghead and a Tomboy.

Note: These chapters have gone through heavy editing to ensure the secrets and surprises of the actual VN are protected and will remain that way until its release. Regardless of changes, the game is being rewrtitten from the ground up and thus this story will not be seen in gameplay. The only thing I know will be in this story and as well as the VN is the school itself.

I hope you enjoy.

-WF86

Chapters (38)
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Comments ( 153 )

Kind of confuses me at the _______ at first, right ____________?

Good story though.

2902591
That is when the main character's name is said, which is a secret as of now. I will add a note of that.
Thank you :)

Comment posted by Clavier deleted Jun 5th, 2014
Comment posted by wolvenfire86 deleted Jun 5th, 2014

Why does that rainbow dash picture remind me of Negi Springfield from Mahou Sensei Negima?

ok im a little confused with this iv only taken a look at the start but its lost me is it some kind of adventure story where the reader places themselves into the role? but the writing feels solid and well balanced a good amount of chapters and i can say ill be giving a full look though soon

May I ask where the cover art for this story was made, and is there a larger version? Or other works by the same artist? It's really quite good. It was enough to draw me in to read the full description, and since I have the next few days off I'll make the time to read this in full.

2906151
Allow me to explain. What you are seeing as the adventure aspect is in place to keep the identity of the main character in Starswirl Acadamy a secret. There is supposed to be a character's name there, but instead I put a blank line where his name would be mentioned.

Does that clear it up?

2906217
The artist Derpii made said picture. He is the head of the art team for SA. I spoken to him when I was on the team and he is not only a very talented artist but a great guy.

Here is a larger picutre: http://i.imgur.com/04wER4w.jpg

in a way yes thank you for that

2906242

Damn impressive. And now I have a new wallpaper.

I wish I could draw. I could once upon a time, I was the computer lab monitor in college which meant hours on end doing absolutely nothing since everyone knew the rules and knew how to use the computers. So I started to doodle and came up with a bunch of little sketches for some of the characters I was writing for at the time. That was nearly a decade ago and I haven't found much motivation to draw since then. I love to write, especially now that I have my moxxi back, but drawing simply is beyond me.

2906264
Hey man, mom and dad weren't lying when they said you can do anything. It just takes practice. :)

2906278

I'll agree that practice is the key to everything but there's a bit of extenuating circumstances.

My hands started shaking about five years ago, and they shake whenever I clasp something. A fork, a pencil, a stylus for my iPad. Doctors haven't found any cause or major problems with me (which is a relief, my grandfather had Parkinsons disease which I have so far tested negative for) but the shakes pretty much prevent me from drawing a straight line even if my life depended on it. This tends to make me frustrated with the quality of drawings I can do since it's significantly less aesthetically pleasing than my earlier works. At this point I'm 'quitting while I'm ahead.' I can still write, so I can vent my creativity in that manner for now.

Didn't meant to unload personal stuff on you, I honestly haven't given a thought to drawing or my problems with it in over a year so this just kinda snuck up on me.

2906324
Dude, it's cool. We all have problems. And bronies listen to each other, right? :)

ok whats this game im nine chapters in and so far its said that i have choices on what to do but i cant seem to see any

2906387

Yep! I'm actually doing some reading now on the Starswirl Academy visual novel, it tickles me to death that folks are doing such a project. Some of my favorite time wasters while at work (I work at home with phone support, and some times a LONG time passes between calls) are visual novels. Katawa Shojo (or however it's pronounced) was extremely enjoyable, right now I'm working on the Fate games.

Speaking of to do lists, I've got to crank out at least two more chapters for MY story before the end of the month, since another time consumer is coming up in the first week of August for me. Next chapter is with my proofreader, two after that just need to get the writing done.

I've added this to my favorites list for later consumption, and I see the chapters are nice little bites which will make it easy to take a break if necessary from my writing. Unless you're a bastard like me and end every chapter with some form of cliffhanger. :twilightsheepish:

2906499
Haha, not to many cliffhangers but there are some. I wrote most chapters in chunks and then connected them. Thanks, hope you enjoy it. And good luck on your project. :)

And I just finished plowing through what has been written so far.

First things first. I want to smack the protagonist. He has Twilight Sparkle! Don't neglect what you have in favor of chasing what you don't! (A bit of a double whammy of personal preference here. IMHO Twily is best pony, plus I've had the unfortunate experience of sacrificing what I had for what I thought would be better and I ended up with nothing in the end)

Second thing, I found some of RD's behavior abrasive at times but 100% believable. It makes her feel more fleshed out as a character for her to have her little flaws and quirks such as her deliberate antagonism at times. After all, real people aren't perfect and I rarely see eye to eye all the time with the people I talk with on a regular basis.

Still, I also feel sad for Twilight though. Using the logic from one of the chapters, she's spent so much time and effort into being with the protagonist and hoping he feels the same way, and now its all slipping away and it seems like there's nothing she can do about it. Makes me feel amazingly sympathetic towards her.

But then again I tend to feel sympathetic to characters that end up in Twilight's situation. Kindred spirits, yeah?

Well im not the kind of person that coment a lot but... Poor Twilight

And I have a question in all route she is your best friend so you have to look her suffer in every route except hers?

I'm a little confused. Will the rest of what you wrote be edited and posted here as well, now that the VN isn't using it? Or will I have to curse you for getting me invested and then stopping when the true conflict has only just begun?
And incidentally, I now want to give Twilight the biggest hug ever :/

2911641
Isn't that terribly wonderful though? You root for RD and feel bad for Twilight at the same time. XD

And originally, Twilight would handle the main character's love-life differently in each route. In Fluttershy's (if memory serves), Twilight was more okay with it because who could possible hate Fluttershy? In Rarity's route, Twilight was very upset but kept it to herself because she felt like she couldn't compete with her beauty. But in this route, Twilight gets heartbroken because RD is so different from her. And Twilight assumes this is because she never was what the main character wanted in a GF. :'( I know it's sad, but my goodness it is delicious.

2913525
I know, Twilliy needs a big hug. :’(

And as for that rest of the rest of my story, I don’t know. I only wrote a little more after this, but had a large story arc planned originally. Right now, I have a lot of projects to finish and much less motivation since I am not officially writing on the SA team. I am not opposed to the idea however.

2911466
Niiice. I know the main character is a total knuckle-head, but he’s a teenager! That’s how they think haha. And sorry about your loss there buddy. Such is life, right?

My rationalization on RD’s behavior is this: take RD’s personality, put it in a female human body, turn on puberty and what do you get? I think I got close to accurate. I also had to flesh out her character more because the show didn’t as much as it could have.

I know, everyone feels sad for Twilight. But still, that is SO delicious. Haha. I love it, I love it! I love breaking people’s hearts in stories. I wanted people to seriously feel for her while also root for RD.

I need more or I will explote!

some of the twiligth rout cause she need some love.

This is a good way to make people know about Starswirl Academy, cause its really good and I think thatnwith some time it will get featured.

2914506

Haha, okay, okay. I'll try :P

The old Twilight route involved Twily being the most adorkable girlfriend ever. From learning about sex via 50 Shades of Grey, to flash blacks of her childhood with the main character. So cute.

Advertising for them was motivation to publish these pieces. :) Help em out, ya know?

I loved this story but there were a ton of mistakes [punctuation made up most if not, all of it (don't hate me...:fluttershbad:).] These last chapters were powerful stuff though.

2914907
Please keep writing. It can't end like this XD

2914979
I know. :( If youspot them and email me, I'll fix them.

2914907

Well after reading that I will just sit here and exploted a litle

Oh Pinkie, you so innocent :pinkiehappy:

Wow, this story is actually pretty clever. I like how defending Fluttershy emotionally, rather than physically, leads to a relationship with her instead of the other way around. I really hate 'alpha male' stories where they're a girl's 'noble protector', becuase that isn't a romantic relationship; that's a father-daughter relationship, and it is never a healthy thing to add romance into one of those.

Rainbow Dash is also so much cleverer than she appears, it's really rather admirable. She doesn't get books, but boy, does she get people. That is something that can really take you far.

And finally, this story does a rather amazing job at making us feel what the protagonist feels (so far). That is absolutely essential in stories like these, and it is good you didn't just take the easy route of making him a blank slate instead *coughtwilightcough*

This chapter kinda ruins most of what I just said. In the last chapter he was put on the spot, so it was okay to physically defend Fluttershy, but I believe that society should be a civil place, and solving problems solely through violence is wrong. The fact that they publicly humiliate the bullies is even worse, because shaming people is never a constructive force in society, and can only lead to bad things. It also appears that RD did this to improve the protagonist's reputation, and he simply accepts this, which I find disgusting. All that was going too far, and as far as I'm concerned, they're the bullies now.

And, worst of all, after you just established last chapter that these guys aren't complete muscle heads, and are more complicated than they look, you immediately treat them like that anyway! I don't think I'm going to be reading any more, sorry. You had me for a while there though, so congrats on that.

2918563
"after you just established last chapter that these guys aren't complete muscle heads, and are more complicated than they look"

??? Whaaaat are you talking about? They are hulking muscle heads. I don't remember making them complicated. Just RD and the main character.

You did raise a good point here and there though. Made me think twice about how I handled that...but I still think my way (writing-wise) was the better way to go.

If you don't wanna read more, it's fine man. But I think you're being very black-and-white here in your analysis. Teenagers do this stuff, and while it certainly shouldn't happen that doesn't mean it does not happen.

I hope you respond to this cause you sound really smart and I'm interested in hearing what you have to say.

2918447
"Rainbow Dash is also so much cleverer than she appears."
I really hope you don't stop reading, cause there is a lot more of that in future chapters.

I hope there will be another chapter soon.:twilightsmile:

Rarely do I find a story so immersive that I would create an account just to add my hopes that it will continue. It's bittersweet to not have the complete story at once, but it also adds some excitement and anticipation. I recall waiting days at a time for new chapters of Fallout Equestria, and I've got that feeling again waiting to see if this story becomes complete.

Fantastic. :heart:

2925713
-sigh- You bronies will be the death of me.
Fine. I'll see what I can pull out. :)

2930725
Crap. Now I HAVE to write more. With compliments as kind as yours, what else can I do? :)

Thanks dude.

I can say that I've been psyched for this game to get off the ground, and jumped at the opportunity to read this when I saw you put it up. It may not be "game cannon" anymore, but it's still got the general feel, wonderful liveliness, and, as an added bonus, it showcases the best character. I'm having fun :twilightsmile:

You're winning me over, author. Brilliant interactions do that to people.

Bad blood already...

Perfect.

293165
:D
She IS the best character after all. That's partially why I ran to her when I had the chance.

But I am glad you enjoy it. The pat on the back really makes me feel good. :P I'm happy you like the story.

Right now, liking Rainbow Dash is conflicting. I know that she is, in her heart, kind and loyal -- almost to a fault. Both (somewhat) admirable qualities. But she is also blunt, incredibly so, and sadly looses points for not having the presence of mind to look beyond what she deems to be "cool". Which is kind of strange, because a scant few minutes ago she was just speaking about the human conscience with startling accuracy, and made herself look like she had at least some deep understanding buried in that head of hers.

It's like she chooses to be willfully ignorant towards certain things, and that's pretty annoying. I do hope our protagonist can rub off on her as time goes on.

Oh, and after giving that whole speech about saying you won by getting under their skin with barbed words and sad truths, what does she do? Suggest they go beat them up.

Way to be classy, Dash.

Edit: Actually, now that I think about it, Nameless here isn't any better. He just scoops up all of her passive insults and slips it into the "jock" bin, like she can't help it. How casually rude. I thought better of you, Protag!

For shame.

I don't understand why Staplesponge was down thumbed, he had valid points. And I agree with some of them. Nameless didn't strike me as the kind of guy to let that slide casually. In fact, I thought he'd be infuriated knowing that she had committed violence in his name! However, what Rainbow did seem to be well within her established character. Something tells me she's an avid follow of the age old saying: "An eye for an eye." And she thought of this as some form of brutal justice.

It doesn't make me okay with it, but I understand.

I advise everyone to sit outside and do nothing for about 30 minutes. It really takes the edge off.

I would totally do that, but I'd fry. This summer heat is ridiculous.

She mocked a friend of hers behind her back, someone she liked and trusted, even though they had little in common. And then...it occurred to me then that she didn’t insult others or make jokes towards people she disliked. She only did it to people she respected.

...it occurred to me that Rainbow Dash had been trying to be my friend all along.

Yeah, no. That right there? Can't believe that. Her small jests yes, but right from the beginning? I highly doubt it. And the whole section just made me cringe anyway. It was so... I don't want to say cliche, maybe corny? I dunno, it felt too quick for that epiphany, especially since we haven't seen her interact with any other person beyond Nameless, Fluttershy, and some Twi. It feels like, since we're missing the other bits of the routes, this is a tad incomplete.

Hmm...

Okay, that was one well done ending.

I smile a lot while reading this, you know that, author? It feels awesome.

Wow, that was one long ass act one...

I think you should write more of this >__>

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