- Member Since 23rd Mar, 2012
- offline last seen Mar 15th, 2015
J8ck78
Bio? What is this....... bio? Not much to go around on my end over here. Average guy, average Brony. What more can one say? I do seem to have a knack for making stories really really fast
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Higherbeach · 9.2k words · 422 41 · 9.7k views
- DrTechno · 36k words · 323 38 · 11k views
- TheRevolution · 17k words · 230 19 · 5.3k views
- Uranium Plastic Cup · 1.9k words · 235 25 · 1.3k views
- Tom From Myspace · 5.3k words · 204 8 · 3.7k views
- PonybringerofDeath · 2.9k words · 193 28 · 4.4k views
- Higherbeach · 103k words · 635 56 · 9.2k views
- Lux · 18k words · 161 13 · 3.5k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.227 seconds
Total duration
644 users online
712,028 hits today, 2,004,447 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Don't know if I should downvote or not. This looks VERY familiar.......
2863912 the fic is an extension of the other fic that it is based on
2863938 Ah! I see it now.
I enjoyed the original story very much so I was quite sceptical towards this but I don't regret reading so far. You pace the story well and your style seems to match Brony19's well.
However, you could use a proofreader - there aren't too many mistakes per se but you tend to forget to erase some words when you rewrite a sentence.
- well, that would pretty much kill the conversation...
2864619 Agreed.
2864619 I thought I fixed that!
Right, sorry 'bout all those comments.
Didn't think they would be published when this was.
Dat Twibrator.
There are a few atomic typos (typos that don't get picked up by regular grammar-checking programs), but overall, it's pretty good.
MOAR
2866470 working on it
Pweez moar
So the running gag is that Gray Flames and Twilight seem to end up in VERY awkward situations... Hmm, I ask you to please continue sir, for you have my curiosity
i demand more
that would be she. There was another misspelling around the Luna and Celestia part.
2868912 Thanks for that! Yeah, Chapter 4 seems to have the most. Don't write upload at 2AM in the morning. That's my advice
this... is really interesting
it's just the 2nd person part... blaahh brain y u no tolerate 2nd person even when it's a good story?!
2868936 not my fault! Taking from Brony19's perspective!
You didn't see anything! Right?
2868938 just because it's his perspective doesn't mean it has to be 2nd person
first person or 3rd person would have been fine
it's just that I am not that character and most of hose actions I would never take, so the effect of it is basically nonexistent
2869104 yeah that is true. I had the same problem when I read it originally and I carried it over to keep with the style of writing. In hindsight maybe I should've switched it from 2nd to 3rd when I re-wrote it, but what's done is done by now and I am not in the mood to go back and redo it all over again. maybe later down the road if I feel like it. Kinda in shock from this stories reception
this is awesome!!!! so happy you were able to continue this story!!
funny yet romantic. makes me feel happy for them
i am entertained
, feel free to continue
2869194 probably tomorrow... or sunday. I have a history of working fast on these things.
Good story, only problem I have is there are multiple occasions in which you have forgotten punctuation. Mainly periods; it tends to make your spacing look odd as well for me.
Definitely going to enjoy where this story goes though.
I suggest that you have one or two proofreaders before you publish, just to make sure that it's free from any grammatical/spelling errors. Aside from that, it's pretty good.
This chapter brought nice comedic feel to the story. You are getting even better with this, although you still tend to forget words from time to time.
Also
more like imitate.
You need an editor man. Mostly to clear up structural errors and grammar issues. Loved the original story, and to be a bit blunt, I'd rather drop than push forward reading a story that wasn't up to the same standard as the original.
Perfect example here, one of at least a dozen instances that needs addressing, and an editor will fix.
Now, read those to yourself. See the issue? Should be...
Note, I'd recommend using GDocs if you aren't already so that the editor(s), when you get one, will be able to leave comments rather than simply fixing the errors, so that you may learn from it.
Well, there are a LOT of simple grammar and spelling mistakes throughout this whole thing.
But at least the story is good.
. Wait what??
Thinking back
She threw her vibrator at him.........SHE THREW HER FUCKING VIBRATOR AT HIM. LOL
I like Luna ships because she is the best princess. Moar please
if this is a human story you may way want to fix that
Im pretty sure that this story is supposed to be "human", right?
Amazing story. Excellent pacing, descriptive detail and the plot (no pun intended) is awesome! Keep up the good work.
So rare are Luna ships this wonderfully written. You have my utmost respects.
Nice story, keep up the good work
2869805 Nope, men.
Faust damn it, Pinkie.
2869597
2869805 ehhh, that, yeah. I flipped a coin when I took this up. Heads human terminology since it's human, tails equine terminology because its MLP. Tails won 2 out of 3. I rest my case
omg amaizng more nows
Needs More.
Also, That Plaigerism Claim needs to be retracted.
nuff said.
2871718 not my call. I'm currently revising the first two chapters. Kinda hard really
2869194