Wedding Crashers
Rearranging Perspectives
Chapter 3: Wedding Crashers
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It had been two weeks since Sam arrived in Ponyville. In that time, the populace had pretty much gotten used to him; Lyra being the only exception. She wanted to ‘interview’ him and Sam was reluctant to say the least. He just didn’t like the way she was looking at him like a tiger would look at a particularly juicy steak.
In any event, that was not important at the moment. Right now, Twilight was setting up a machine to absorb and analyze magic. Last night, Sam’s own magic had finally hit the point of self-sustainability and he had stopped absorbing ambient magic. As such, Twilight was wasting no time in getting a sample of that magic so they could find out all they could about it.
“OK Sam, it’s ready. Just place your hands on the pad and try to discharge some of your magic. It should be instinctual,” Twilight instructed and Sam complied.
“One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to GO!” As soon as the last word left his mouth, Sam felt the magic respond and he could feel it racing down his arms. For a second, everything seemed fine, but then a sharp, arching pain shot up his spine and he sucked in breath through gritted teeth. He stopped the flow of magic and the pain abated.
“Sam, are you OK?!” Twilight shouted
“I’m fine, just put too much magic into it. My body probably hasn’t had the chance to adapt to magic flowing yet,” Sam knew that was a lie. On an instinctual level, he knew that the pain was always going to be there; a price for the magic. Law of Equivalent Exchange and stuff that Sam didn’t particularly want to think about. “Did we get enough magic in for a reading?”
“Yes, we did,” Twilight’s gaze lingered upon her student for a few moments longer before looking at the readings. “Unfortunately, the machine wasn’t able to decipher much. What it does tell us is that your magic is highly elemental.”
“Elemental how? Like classical elements only? A particular element? Some people consider time an element. Is space an element then?” Sam rambled
“I’m not completely sure. If I had to hazard a guess, I’d say all elements; at least to a certain degree. Maybe even time,” Twilight answered, her eyebrows scrunched together in concentration as she tried to make heads or tails of the readings.
“Does my magic need a certain structure? Like do I have to say a spell or something to get the desired effects?” Sam questioned
“No, I don’t think so. Where would you get an idea like that anyway?” Twilight responded
“Well, if you’re right and my magic is connected to all the elements, then I thought I would need some structure to keep, say, fire and water separate,” Sam replied
“Oh! No, no, no, you misunderstood! The way your magic seems to work, the elements are all in harmony, just waiting for a particular elemental part to be called upon. It’s even likely you can mix two or more elements together to get different effects. However, there’s the question of how much strain that would put on your body, if any at all,” Twilight remarked
“Well, the only way we can really figure that one out is through practice,” Sam said, but at that moment, Twilight’s coo-coo clock went off and sounded the 1 o’clock hour.
“Oh my gosh! Is it that late already?! I’m gonna be late for the picnic!” Twilight panicked
“The basket’s in the fridge. Get it and run and you might make it. I’ll just stay here and practice,” Sam said
“Good plan, just don’t strain yourself!” Twilight ordered as she dashed into the library. She snatched up the basket with her magic and then bolted towards the agreed upon spot for the picnic.
“Hi, girls, sorry I’m late!” Twilight greeted when she finally got there.
“It’s fine, darling. Truth be told, we’d probably have been more worried if you had been on time,” Rarity chuckled
“Yeah, ‘cause you’re always getting wrapped up in this or that!” Pinkie added and with that, the picnic began. Only to be stopped with the arrival of Spike and a message for Twilight.
“‘Dear Twilight Sparkle, I am sure you are as excited as I am about the upcoming wedding in Canterlot,’” Twilight read, “Wedding?” she wondered, “‘I will be presiding over the ceremony, but would very much like you, your student, and your friends to help with the preparations for this wonderful occasion. Fluttershy, I would like you and your songbird choir to provide the music. Pinkie Pie, I can think of no one more qualified than you to host the reception. Applejack, you will be in charge of the catering for the reception. Rainbow Dash, I would very much appreciate it if you could perform a Sonic Rainboom complete their ‘I dos’. Rarity, you will be responsible for designing the dresses for the bride and her bride’s maids. As for you and your student, Twilight, you will have the most important role of all: making sure everything goes as planned. See you all very soon, yours Princess Celestia.’”
To say that five of the Elements were ecstatic would be like saying a little kid is only mildly excited for Christmas. They were all over the moon, except Twilight. She was confused.
“Who’s getting married?” Twilight wondered
“Oh, wait, I was probably supposed to give you this one first,” Spike admitted sheepishly and handed Twilight a second scroll.
“‘Princess Celestia cordially invites you to the wedding of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and-’” *Gasp* “My Brother?!” Twilight was not particularly pleased. It was understandable, after all, her brother had failed to notify her that he was getting married, let alone engaged. Instead, she had found out in one of the most impersonal ways possible: a wedding invitation from Princess Celestia. The fact that Twilight didn’t know the bride only compounded the ire she was currently feeling for her brother.
After expositing through song to the other Elements about the bond she had shared with her brother before coming to Ponyville, she revealed that her brother happened to be Captain of the Royal Guard. Rarity fainted at the idea of doing a wedding for both a princess and Captain of the Royal Guard. The other five weren’t much better. Twilight decided to go home and inform Sam of the news. She just hoped he was more sympathetic.
“So we’re going to Canterlot for the wedding of your brother and a girl you don’t know?” Sam asked for confirmation
“That about sums it up,” Twilight confirmed
“And he gave you no previous notification?”
“Not so much as a slip of paper.”
“Then I won’t stand in your way when you attempt to brutally murder him,” Sam quipped
“Gee, thanks,” Twilight snarked
“If ya like, I can hold him down. This magic thing is a lot easier than they make it out to be in the books,” Sam remarked
“I can handle him on my own; I am Princess Celestia’s personal student, after all,” Twilight said
“Well then, let’s get packed and go!” Sam exclaimed and they did just that
The train ride to Canterlot was fairly uneventful, save for the tidbit that Spike was responsible for the bachelor party.
“Um, what’s a bachelor party?” Spike asked
“You’re in charge of the bachelor party and you don’t know what it is? Perhaps it’s for the best then,” Sam remarked
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Spike questioned
“Oh nothing,” Sam said innocently and the two went back and forth for the next hour.
The other thing was Twilight’s increasingly melancholy mood. She finally confided in Applejack that she was worried about losing her brother for good. Applejack tried to ease Twilight’s fears, but didn’t do so well.
When they eventually made it to Canterlot, they passed through some kind of force field. A force field that didn’t seem to like Sam all that much. When it passed over him, it sparked something fierce.
“OW! THAT HURT!” He shouted as the last of the sparks disappeared. Beyond that, he seemed to be OK.
“That was weird. I wonder why the force field reacted that way.” Twilight wondered
“Just an offhand guess, but maybe the shield is meant to keep out anything that isn’t a pony. However, that poses the question of how I got through in the first place,” Sam theorized while rubbing his arms to try and dispel the static-y feeling he had acquired.
Upon disembarking from the train, it was immediately noticeable the sheer number of guards standing around. It was also noticeable how many spears Sam had pointed at him. Therefore, he did what any nerd of questionable sanity would do: make the Vulcan hand gesture and spout ‘live long and prosper’ and ‘I come in peace’.
“Guys! Relax, he’s with us!” Twilight barked and the guards hesitatingly disengaged the spears.
“I’m sure they’re just taking the necessary precautions; royal weddings bring out the strangest ponies,” Rarity remarked and then, as if to prove her point, Pinkie Pie sneezed confetti. Twilight then marched off to go find her brother with Sam tailing behind. None of the guards were stupid enough to get between an angry Twilight Sparkle and the target of said anger.
Shining Armor spotted his sister and her student and decided he could ask about Sam after he survived his little sister’s apparent rage. After all, a good leader must know when to pick his battles.
“Twily!” Shining Armor exclaimed and went to greet her, but she wasn’t having any of it. She was angry about his not informing her of the wedding before now and he had better have a very good reason for it. His reason was that Canterlot was under threat and he had to maintain the shield around the city as well as keep all the guards in order and on top of that, he had a wedding to plan. It was all very time consuming and he was barely getting enough sleep.
Those were pretty good reasons, or at least good enough to get Twilight to forgive him. Now he had to initiate the coup de grâce.
“I’m sorry for not telling you, so I would understand if you wouldn’t want to be my best mare…” Shining trailed off and his sister took the bait hook, line, and sinker. He wasn’t her big brother for nothing, after all.
“I’d be honored,” Twilight said and they hugged, “But I’m still pretty ticked you’re marring somepony I don’t even know!”
‘I must be losing my touch,’ Shining Armor thought to himself
“When did you even meet this Princess Mi Amore Cadenza?” Twilight asked and Shining suddenly broke into a grin.
“Twily, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza is Cadance; your old foal-sitter,” Shining Armor said and after a second, the name clicked in Twilight’s head.
“Cadance? As in the best foal-sitter ever in the history of foal-sitters?” Twilight exclaimed and she went into reminiscing mode.
“I hope I’m not interrupting anything important?” Speak of the Devil and he shall appear. Or in this case, she will appear. Upon spotting her old foal-sitter, Twilight sprang into an old nursery rhyme they used to do together, but Cadance just looked at her as if she was out of her mind.
“What are you doing?” Cadance asked and then her eyes drifted to Sam, “And what in the hay are you?”
“My name is Sam. I’m a human and I am also Twilight’s student,” Sam introduced himself. Then Shining Armor and Cadance walked off. Twilight stood there for a moment before storming off to the kitchens to check on Applejack’s progress while muttering under her breath. Thankfully, sampling AJ’s apple fritters did wonders for her mood. Sam’s mood was also greatly improved by watching Spike play with the figurines that were supposed to go on top of the cake.
Unfortunately, Princess Cadance walked in and Twilight’s mood plummeted once more. Twilight knew something was off, but she couldn’t quite place her hoof on it. These suspicions weren’t helped by the fact that Cadance was suddenly insisting everyone use her full name. When Cadance threw some apple fritters into the garbage after claiming to ‘love, love, love’ them, she decided to get to the bottom of it.
“You know, this might just be me watching one too many body snatcher movie, but I’m getting the distinct impression that this isn’t the Cadance you know,” Sam commented to Twilight on their way to check on Rarity.
“Body snatcher? What makes you say that? Sure, she’s become uptight, rude, arrogant, bossy, and nothing like the foal-sitter I remember, but body snatching?” Twilight asked incredulously
“It’s the way she responded to you when you did that nursery rhyme. She didn’t say ‘I don’t have time for childish things like that’ or something to that effect. She looked at you like you were insane and further, there wasn’t even the slightest sign of any recognition. I just think it seems pretty suspicious,” Sam answered
“I don’t know. I mean, she’d have to fool Shining Armor too, right? So she’s forgotten all about me, it doesn’t mean she’s a body snatcher,” Twilight said
“Perhaps,” Sam allowed as they entered the room that Rarity was working in. Twilight decided to try venting to Rarity and see if she had any useful advice, but Princess Mi Amore Cadenza walked in with her bride’s maids two minutes later. One of which happened to be Lyra. It was merely a coincidence that Sam had suddenly vanished.
In any event, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza ripped into Rarity’s designs and glared at her bride’s maids when they said they liked the dresses. Once they left, Sam reappeared. After that, Twilight and Sam spent some time to check on the gardening and weather teams before going to check on Pinkie Pie. Princess Mi Amore Cadenza was already there.
Pinkie Pie was being her usual hyper-active self and the room the reception was supposed to be held in was filled with board games, balloons, streamers, and a hand crank phonograph. Princess Mi Amore Cadenza declared it fit for a six-year-old birthday party. It was meant to be an insult, but Pinkie Pie, being Pinkie Pie, took it as a compliment.
Later, everyone gathered for a late dinner and Twilight was very open about her dislike of the new Princess Mi Amore Cadenza.
“She did raise her voice to one of my songbirds,” Fluttershy conceded, “But he was awfully off key.” Fluttershy then brought forth the offender and it cawed. It was rather painful to listen to. Twilight insisted that Princess Mi Amore Cadenza was an awful pony and that she shouldn’t even be allowed to know Shining Armor. The rest of the Elements seemed to think that Twilight was merely being possessive of her brother. So Twilight stormed off and Sam decided to follow.
Eventually, Twilight’s meandering led them to Shining Armor’s house. Twilight tried to talk to her older brother, but Princess Mi Amore Cadenza nixed that plan. She wanted to talk to Shining Armor…alone. Naturally, Twilight and Sam eavesdropped on their conversation as well as peering through a slightly cracked open door. What they saw disturbed both of them.
Princess Mi Amore Cadenza didn’t want Shining Armor to wear a crest that had belonged to his favorite uncle. Shining Armor began to disagree with her, but then a mysterious headache struck and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza used some kind of spell on Shining Armor. Twilight and Sam both decided that they had overstayed their welcome and beat a hasty retreat.
“She’s mind controlling Shining Armor! She is a body snatcher!” Twilight whisper-shouted
“What are we gonna do? How are we going to prove she is a body snatcher? It’ll be her word against ours and it’s an outlandish claim! No one would ever believe us!” Sam exclaimed in the same hushed tone
“We’ve gotta tell the others and hope they believe us,” Twilight decided and the two rushed to where the mares were staying. Unfortunately, they were too late. Princess Mi Amore Cadenza had offered them all positions as her new bride’s maids. Even worse, none of the others found it suspicious that Princess Mi Amore Cadenza wouldn’t tell them what had happened to the old bride’s maids.
“We’re doomed! Shining Armor’s going to get married to a fake and we’re the only two who’ll ever know! Who knows what she has planned for him!” Twilight cried as she and Sam wondered aimlessly through the castle grounds.
“There’s always the chuck-n-pray strategy,” Sam remarked
“Meaning?”
“Tomorrow during the rehearsals, we burst in and attack the fake. With any luck, the real Cadance will be able to take back control, at least momentarily, while the fake is knocked out or distracted by the pain,” Sam explained
“Too risky, too much of that plan is left to chance. The next best thing is to burst in and accuse her of being a fake and hope Princess Celestia listens,” Twilight suggested
“Then that’s what we’ll do and tonight, I’ll be working really hard on the ‘pray’ part of the chuck-n-pray,” Sam quipped and after that, they said good-night and went to bed.
The next morning, the two burst in dramatically during the rehearsals and ousted the fake for what she really was. Unfortunately, for them, no one gave them the time of day. Then the fake finished them off by starting the water works. It was a flawless KO. Shining then claimed that the spell was a headache cure because he was getting headaches from maintaining the force field.
Twilight didn’t buy that excuse for an instant. Her brother’s special talent was shields, after all, and it didn’t make sense for him to get migraines unless he was seriously overtaxing himself to the point of risking dangerous magical exhaustion. From what Twilight had observed of the shield when she had passed through it, and what she knew of her brother’s capabilities, the shield shouldn’t have needed anywhere close to that much energy.
Shining then went on to claim that the reason the old bride’s maids had been replaced was because they had wanted to meet the royalty. That excuse didn’t add up in either Twilight’s or Sam’s minds. One of them had been Lyra for crying out loud! What possible connection could she have had to Cadance anyway?
What Shining said before he left, however, was what really hurt Twilight. He told her she could forget about being his best mare and further told her she was no longer welcome to the wedding. The hurt was piled on as the other Elements, Spike, and even Princess Celestia abandoned her. Sam and Twilight were left alone in the room.
“Well…that was unexpectedly harsh,” Sam remarked, “I wonder if we should go try and wake Luna up and see what she thinks.”
“What’s the point? If Princess Celestia didn’t believe us, then I doubt Luna will,” Twilight said morosely
“You two have been nothing but a pain in my rear from the moment you got here!” The two whipped around and saw the fake standing there, her horn glowing green as well as her eyes. Green flames suddenly sprang up around them. “Where you’re going, you’ll never bother anyone again!” The duo then started sinking into the floor.
“We’re melting, melting, melting!” Sam knew he should have been taking the situation more seriously, but they didn’t seem to be dying, and how often does someone get to say that line with proper context?
In any event, they dropped down into a pitch black cave and so Twilight lit her horn. When she did, they noticed that there were crystals everywhere.
“Where are we?” Twilight wondered
“The caves beneath Canterlot,” Answered the fake via projecting her image on the crystals. “It was once the home to greedy unicorns who wanted to make use of the gems here, but now it’s your prison. You can cry out all you like, no one will hear you and no one will think to look for the two of you down here either. Most ponies don’t even know these caves exist, which is why it is perfect for keeping those who want to interfere with my plans!”
“What plans are you talking about?” Twilight asked
“Do you really think I’d be so stupid as to monologue about my plans to you?” The fake asked
“DON’T YOU DARE HURT MY BROTHER!” Twilight shouted and then let loose a blast of pure magic at the fake, but it reflected off the crystals and nearly hit the two of them. So Twilight modified her blast and was able to shatter the crystals. Eventually her blasts uncovered what seemed to be the fake.
“NO! WAIT!” She shouted, but Twilight pounced on her. Then the look alike started that rhyme that Cadance and Twilight had shared. Further, she looked absolutely awful.
“So…no body snatchers?” Sam asked
“Shape Shifters…speaking of which, what are you?” Cadance asked
“Shape Shifters?! Oh well, that was my second guess. Perhaps I have read one too many Animorphs book…anyway, my name’s Sam. I’m a human and Twilight’s new student,” Sam greeted
“Student?! Little Spark has a student?! Oh, you’re all grown up now,” Cadance cooed
“Cadance! Don’t call me Little Spark!” Twilight protested
“No matter how old you get, you’ll always be my Little Spark,” Cadance replied and Twilight groaned
“Hey Twilight, does crystal count as an element? Or is it like a subsection of Earth?” Sam asked
“I’m not sure off the top of my head, but I wouldn’t recommend trying to channel any magic into these crystals. Who knows what’ll happen? We should try getting out the old fashioned way first,” Twilight decided and the three took off towards what they hoped would be an exit. Of course, there had to be a song to go along with it. We wouldn’t want things to get boring. During said song, the trio came across an old mine cart that nearly led us to their deaths.
‘Wings! Thank God for wings!’ Sam thought as Cadance flew them to safety. Just as they spotted the exit, three brainwashed bride’s maids walked out of the shadows. They sounded entirely too much like zombies for Sam’s tastes. He enjoyed a good zombie killing game as much as the next guy, but even Lyra didn’t deserve to be turned into a mindless puppet. Thankfully, they were mindless puppets. Hence, they were easily distracted by a bouquet of flowers Cadance conjured.
With those three disposed of, Cadance, Twilight, and Sam rushed to where the ceremony was being held. They arrived just in the nick of time.
“What?! But how did you escape my bride’s maids?!” The fake shouted
“Next time you brainwash your guards, be sure to leave them with a little bit of common sense,” Sam snarked and Cadance announced to everyone there that the fake was a Changeling: A parasitic species of shape shifters that feed off of love. With the jig up, the Changeling dropped the disguise. Then they found out that this particular Changeling was the Queen.
“As Queen, it is my job to find food for my subjects and Equestria has more love than any place I’ve ever encountered,” The Queen explained and Sam noticed Celestia had inexplicable vanished.
“Hey Twilight, where’s your teacher, out on a coffee break?” Sam whispered as the Queen monologued.
“I don’t know! Maybe she’s gone to wake Luna!” Twilight replied as the Queen revealed that her army was chipping away at Shining Armor’s shield.
“Why don’t you have Shining Armor drop the shield?” Sam suddenly asked
“As much as that would simplify things, he is still very loyal to the throne. If I were to make him take down the shield, my mind control spell would be put in unnecessary danger. Besides, my army is doing such a good job that they’ll be done any minute now,” The Queen answered, “In any case, first we will conquer Canterlot and then all of Equestria!”
“No,” Celestia said, back from her mysterious and ill-timed coffee break, “You won’t. You may have made it impossible for Shining Armor to act as Captain of the Guard, but now that you’ve so foolishly revealed yourself, I can protect my subjects from you!” With that, Celestia fired off a beam of magic at the Queen Changeling, which she returned in kind. In the end, The Queen managed to overpower Celestia.
“Princess Celestia!” Twilight cried and the Elements rushed to her side. She told them to get the Elements of Harmony and use them to stop the Queen. They raced towards where they were kept, with Sam right behind them, but then the Changeling Army broke the shield. Eventually, they were surrounded.
“Well, there’s no practice like a real life-or-death situation!” Sam quipped, but then the Changelings put their shape shifting capabilities on display by turning into copies of each one of them. The fight was pure chaos. Spells were flying every which way, one couldn’t tell friend from foe. Sam didn’t know how to react. He was mostly just throwing around water to distract Changelings and not harm any allies. That is, until an idea came to him. An idea so stupid, it just might work.
Sam quickly took off his socks and shoes and stood bare footed in the middle of the fight. He used his magic to sense the vibrations in the ground and felt it. Six of them were a good deal heavier than the rest. He had found a way to tell them apart. With that problem solved, he began ripping into the Changelings like there was no tomorrow.
Meanwhile…TWILIGHT LASER GATTLING GUN! Pinkie just grabbed Twilight out of nowhere and turned her into a stationary weapon of magical lavender laser destruction. When she got tired of that, she whipped out what can only be dubbed as a party canon. From that day forth, Changeling lore spoke of The Pink One, The Chaotic Tornado, and The Mistress of the Party Canon.
When all the Changelings round about lay defeated, the party rushed onward. Unfortunately, there was a whole new swarm waiting for them inside and a second charging them from the rear. Long story short, they got their flanks handed to them. The Changelings then took their new prisoners to their Queen.
“Go, feed!” She ordered
“Feed on what? Fear? Hate? Don’t you Changelings feed on love?” Sam asked
“Love is our preferred food source, but we can get by on other strong emotions,” The Queen responded
“That’s nice. Do you have a name? Referring to you as ‘Queen of the Changelings’ all the time is rather bothersome and personally, I’d like to know the name of our wannabe overlord so when this is all over and we eat our cake we can make proper jokes about you and not just your title,” Sam quipped
“Insolent Whelp! I am Queen Chrysalis and you will never defeat me! I defeated the mighty Celestia!” Chrysalis crowed, “But what’s truly funny is that you and Twilight were the only ones who suspected, yet you were tossed aside by your so called ‘friends’ like so much garbage. They were so caught up in their wedding plans that it was child’s play to remain undetected! It got so bad that I purposefully acted like a brat just to see how stupid you ponies really are!”
“We’re sorry Twi, we should’ve listened to you,” Applejack apologized
“It’s not your fault, she fooled everypony,” Twilight responded
“The only reason we got really suspicious in the first place is because of my tastes in bad 80’s sci-fi films,” Sam added and then Chrysalis began to sing. Meanwhile, Twilight freed Cadance and her white mage powers activated and broke the mind control spell.
“Shining Armor, perform your spell!” Twilight implored
“Go right ahead, what do I care? My Changelings are already within the city,” Chrysalis remarked
“I don’t have the strength…” Shining Armor panted as he tried to muster up the needed energy.
“My love will give you strength!” Cadance declared
“That may be so, but will it give you enough strength?” Chrysalis asked in a mocking tone. She watched as a spark leapt between Cadance’s and Shining Armor’s horns and the magic began to blossom. She looked totally unconcerned as they rose up into the air. She even yawned during those last seconds the spell was charging. Then the spell blasted outwards…and Chrysalis’ cockiness proved to be justified.
Chrysalis just stood there and instead of her usual green magic, a black beam shot out of her horn. The two energies fought for dominance for what seemed like hours but was in reality only a few moments. Then, Cadance’s and Shining Armor’s spell shattered and the two fell to the ground.
“You fools thought I came here with merely my own strength. In truth, my Master gave me the power to defeat Celestia and defy the power of your love! That’s not all he gave me. He also gave me these!” Multiple beams of black shot from her horn and portals opened. Out of them came creatures that were about three feet tall and were bipedal. They were mostly black, with the exception of their bulbous heads, which were red and orange and looked vaguely like the sun. Imagine the face of the moon from Majora’s Mask except on the sun and you’ll get the basic idea. When the portals closed, there were twenty of them in total.
“BEHOLD, THE SUN EATERS! The Sun Eaters are invincible! They shall be the instrument of you destruction! The Changelings will rule forever!” Chrysalis cackled, but she was too busy gloating to notice Sam.
Seeing the Sun Eaters, something had Awoken inside Sam. A message in a bottle; a memory long forgotten buried in the magic of humanity. The last moments of a war that had been wiped form History so humanity would not mourn for all it had lost. The instructions for making the only weapons that could stand against the Sun Eaters and their Master. The last hope for all of Reality.
As Sam weaved the magics that had been lost to humanity for an eon, the whole of Canterlot Castel shook. Ancient Forces were pulled together for the first time in that dimension for their final stand.
“What’s going on?! What are you doing?!” Chrysalis demanded to know, but Sam wasn’t going to answer, too focused on what he was trying to accomplish. Suddenly, the shaking stopped. Then, out of the floor, burst a heater shield, which was speckled with stars and right in the middle was the infinity symbol.
The Sun Eaters began to grow nervous; their primitive memories and instincts recognized the shield and what it stood for. They also knew what happens next. Chrysalis was too confused to notice or care.
Sam walked up to the hovering shield and slipped it onto his left forearm. It readjusted itself for Sam. The Sun Eaters were now only barely contained by Chrysalis’ control over them. Finally, Sam seemingly reached into the shield and pulled out a double edged hand-and-a-half sword with the symbol of the sun emblazoned upon the middle of the shining silver blade. The grip of the sword was a fiery red and its cross-guard a vibrant orange.
The Sun Eaters could stand it no more. They charged at their enemy wielding the weapon and shield that had been the bane of so many of their brethren. Their tainted, twisted magic was fired at Sam, but it was deflected by the shield. Electricity then raced down the sword and discharged into the mass of Sun Eaters, felling five of their number and harming several more.
Their ranks broken, the Sun Eaters panicked. Some continued to fruitlessly fire spells at Sam while others tried to flee. It mattered not, as they all fell, by either electricity or the bite of the blade itself. All the while, Ponies and Changelings alike gazed on in astonishment. When the last of the Sun Eaters were destroyed, Sam turned to Chrysalis.
“I give you this one warning,” Sam spoke in a monotone, “Flee this land and take your armies with you, or I will annihilate you all.” His sword was sparking dangerously while he spoke and even the shield seemed to give off a feeling of cold power. Chrysalis was still reeling over the loss of her Sun Eaters. Her Master had told her they were invincible! If they had been defeated so easily, then what could that blade to do her? Chrysalis didn’t think twice about calling the order to retreat.
Once Chrysalis and all the Changelings were gone, everyone cheered; everyone, except Sam. Twilight noticed her student hadn’t moved since issuing his ultimatum.
“Sam?” She asked, and then touched him. Without any warning, Sam fell backwards and the sword went clattering across the floor. Sam’s empty eyes continued to stare unblinkingly. All those present stood in shock. Twilight was the first to snap out of it.
“SAM?!” She cried; panic overtaking her ability to think clearly. Why wasn’t he responding? Was he dead? What could have killed him? Her cry awoke the others from their shock and they all gathered around the human.
“Everypony, please back away! He needs air!” Centuries of ruling had taught Celestia to keep calm in a crisis. This lesson proved invaluable once more as she set about calming the panic-stricken hearts of her little ponies. “He is not dead, only unconscious. We need to get him medical attention and would somepony please go wake my sister?”
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When Sam awoke, he was greeted by the sight of eight very colorful equines gathered around his bed.
“Didn’t we already do this? Or am I stuck in a time loop?” Sam snarked
“Looks like he’s fine,” Applejack deadpanned
“What do you remember before waking up here?” Celestia asked
“I remember Chrysalis summoning up her Heartless wannabes and then something about a sword and shield…” Sam trailed off as he tried to bring the fuzzy memories into focus.
“Are these the sword and shield you speak of?” Luna asked and then magically lifted the two objects up and onto Sam’s bed. He gazed at them a few moments before a fragment of a memory became clear and he rested his right hand on the shield.
“The Shield of Infinity. The Guardian of Endless Possibilities,” Sam named the shield. His hand then moved to the sword, “Solaris.”
“Solaris? What does that mean?” Twilight asked
“It’s not its proper name, but that’s the one it…gave me. If that makes any sense? Solaris is Latin for ‘Of the Sun’. I don’t know why it would chose that name,” Sam remarked
“Chrysalis named those creatures ‘Sun Eaters’. Perhaps there’s a connection,” Celestia hypothesized
“It sure did take care of those varmints!” Applejack exclaimed
“What about the wedding? Did I miss it?” Sam asked
“The wedding was postponed until tomorrow so everything could be repaired. You’ve been out for three days,” Celestia responded
“That’s good. I wouldn’t have wanted to miss it on account of being an inexperienced wuss,” Sam quipped and those who were not above such things, rolled their eyes.
The rest of that day was spent finalizing the preparations for the party. Applejack nearly had to beat Cadance out of the kitchen with a broom to keep her from eating all the apple fritters; Rarity’s dress was a major hit with Cadance and her bride’s maids; Cadance adored Fluttershy’s songbirds; and Pinkie Pie got along with Cadance famously.
The next day, the wedding went off without a hitch, complete with CMC flower girls and Applejack sneaking her Stetson’s on while Rarity wasn’t looking. Finally, as the bride and groom kissed, Sam got to see his first Sonic Rainboom.
The reception started off normally enough, but this was a reception planned by Pinkie Pie, so things didn’t stay that way for long. As soon as Twilight gave the go ahead, Pinkie pulled Vinyl Scratch out of nowhere and threw Twilight a microphone. That meant it was time for one last musical number before the whole thing came to a close. Once that was done, the bride and groom rode off into the distance to get started on their honeymoon.
“This was a great wedding,” Twilight sighed as she watched them go.
“Oh yeah? Just wait until you see what I’ve got planned for the bachelor party!” Spike proclaimed and Sam facepalmed
“Yer a wee bit late boy-o,” Sam quipped in a passable Scottish accent.
“Waddaya mean late?” Spike asked nervously
“A bachelor is defined as an unmarried male,” Sam replied
“Dang it!” Spike cried and the rest of the night consisted of Spike trying to drown his sorrows in donuts.
The next day, before the group left for Ponyville, Celestia summoned them.
“Greetings, everyone,” She said, “I’ve called you here to discuss matters of great importance, but first I will return these-” She paused to bring out the Shield of Infinity and Solaris, “-to their rightful owner.” She then gave the two items to Sam.
“Thank you,” Sam said and took hold of the sword and shield
“I’ve taken the liberty of having a sheath made for your sword. I have brought you all here because I fear we have not heard the last of the Sun Eaters, Chrysalis, or her mysterious Master. Given that they were able to defeat myself, this is not a threat we can afford to take lightly. As such, I have no choice but to formally recruit you all into the army as generals. Six of you are the Elements of Harmony and the other is the only known human to walk Equestria and the wielder of the only known weapon against the Sun Eaters. For now, I want you to all return home and get your affairs in order. When you return, I shall brief you more thoroughly on what is required. I wish I didn’t have to do this, but I will not stand idly by while my little ponies are in danger!” Celestia said
“We’re with you, Princess Celestia,” Twilight responded with the other Elements nodding their heads in agreement.
“I’ve only been here a few short weeks, but in that time I’ve been shown nothing but kindness. For better or for worse, this is my home now. I will defend it,” Sam replied
“Thank you, all of you. You are dismissed,” With that, the group left to go home and ready their things for what was ahead. Meanwhile, Celestia stood there and sighed to herself. The last real conflict had been during the Nightmare Moon crisis. It had been over five hundred years since there had been a standing army for crying out loud! Now Celestia was faced with a similar crisis, worse in some ways and better in others. At the very least, Luna was with her this time. Celestia allowed herself a small, sad little smile. Her younger sister had always been the more headstrong and contentious of the two. Preferring to clash swords than tongues, where Celestia found her battleground. However, in all the mess, one thing in particular stood out to her and made her shiver at the implications. The creatures had been dubbed Sun Eaters. What did that say of their Master? Celestia had been directly tied to the Sun since time immemorial to the mortal pony. If this new enemy was powerful enough to defeat her, she didn’t want to think about what it could do to her Sun.
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I would like to be the first in hopefully a long list of people who deeply enjoyed this chapter. And please feel free to do this to any number of episodes as you see fit. Between you and me ( and anypony else that reads this comment ) I enjoyed this much better then the actual episodes. Please keep up the good work. Also, I am hopeful that in a later chapter, you will do this to episode 10 of season 3, the one where they try to reform Discord. I would love to see an interaction of Sam and Discord. Celestia help us, the things they'd say to each other. I don't think Equestria could handle that much chaos!
2867384
Oh, Sam and Discord will interact...but perhaps not in the way you think and most certainly not in the setting. *Evil Cackle* I can't wait until I get those two together!
P.S. If I did it during the 'Keep Calm and Flutter On' Episode, Discord would never get reformed. *wink wink*
2867483 Neither can I.
“I’ve only been here a few short weeks, but in that time I’ve been shown nothing but kindness. For better or for worst, this is my home now. I will defend it,” Sam replied
it is supposed to be "for better or worse"...
just helping.
weird story, but it's ok I guess.
Equivalent exchange is from Full Metal Alchemist
Recruiting civilians with no military experience as generals? I think it would make more sense if they were considered a special unit, seperate from the military and acting directly under the crown. The only reason the six friends have any importance is because they are the elements of harmony.