Diceman
Joined 3rd Feb, 2012 ·
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Would be nice If folks would upvote if they like it and if they downvote at least leave a comment as to why. I can't fix errors in my writing or story telling if no pony ever tells me what is wrong.
uh oh, tragedy? experience tells me a tragedy tag means it is not going to end well for anyone
4510498 People who downvote without explaining why are cowards. But hey, at least you've got a pretty good like-dislike ratio so far.
4511342
Getting a lot of favs as well, not enough to get front page but next time gadget...next time...
4512165
Lysdexia can be an absolute bitch sometimes.
I'm loving the story so far!
I think you have a lot of
Potential as a fic writer.
The only problem I'm having
With the story so far is the amount of
Times you mention Twilight being on
Heat.
Haha twilight sleepy
Is it necessary to read the previous 142k words of Zecora and Fluttershy... whatever it may be? Cause I like Twi and Chryssi, but not big on Flutters and Zecora.
4514313
I add to that question
meh it was pretty good
4514313
No, this is only kind of a side story sequel in the same universe. You could just read the very last chapter of the prequel to this to get an idea of what is going to happen but it's not necessary.
"Twilight sat up slowly, her body may not have been damaged in any way but it aced so much, as if she suddenly had arthritis."
You spelled "ached" wrong.
4515828
Missed it in editing. Thanks for catching it for me.
4515928 Np. For some reason, I had a feeling I had to do this some point today.
....how does a fic of fluttershy getting herbs from zacora turn into a sequel of twilight being the new changeling queen?.......
4521804
The very last chapter of 'Jungle Fever' had Twilight hanging out with a very different Chrysalis than we all know. This is the side story of how that came to be. It is also my first step into other sequels/side stories in the same universe.
4523206 i see.....
Yay 69th like
anyway i like where this is going....i demand changling sex 
as spike watchs cause he is just that badass....no...just no changling sex ok but no spike .....anyway you have a fav from me so make sure you update damn it!
I love Chryslight, I just hope the Tragedy isn't for any of the main characters.
a shame it cut right when it was about to get interesting^^
im looking forward to the next chapter
this is gonna get awkward real fast
You bastard, you couldn't have hanged us off a worse vertical drop if you tried.
Please update soon.
I second the motion for a speedy update!
...please?
OK, Twilight's a changeling now. So go home Celestia, you've been disowned.
We need to know if there well be a dirty threesome with the sun godness hell make a fucking orgy with all the princesses and shing and maybe 2 other changlings
nice chapter i can feel true love comming off of this
4616945
Next 2 chapters are a bit story heavy including a villain that I actually didn't like writing but hey there's
also a fight scene too so there's that.
4617099 alright captian if you say so
Good clop means good clop or even better.
Let's analyse a situation.
Twilight within several years fulfilled duties of the queen, resolved internal political issues, fought against disorders and cared for local population. Her management was so effective that locals fell in love with her as if she was their kin.
In award Chryzalis imposed additional contractual obligations on Twilight: intim services. In the course of a execution of the unequal transaction heavy harm to health of Twilight is done: broken body, cardiological damages, intoxication and the subsequent violent transformation the devil knows in what and probably unwanted impregnation.
It not simply base ingratitude, this is assault in wide scale. By all means Celestia is bitch if she left Twilight to Chrysalis.
What did just read.... Well, so long sanity. Er, at least what was left of it. ...If there was any left.
4620155
Chrysalis is still herself, though changing slowly, she still is at her core functionally evil, you can see this in some f her mannerisms that she tries to (poorly) keep hidden. Also Celestia still has a part to play.
Also Celestia would not have won a confrontation there. Chrysalis has shown before to be nearly on par with her and the addition of thousands of worker and soldier drones around would have been bad.
Additionally I'm not going with the unwanted pregnancy thing. I'm also not trying to write her as perfect, she is still quite manipulative, she IS a changeling after-all, it's kinda her thing.
4620369
Unwanted pregnancys is one of the most intriguing aspects. Dont throw it out.
4620397
As intriguing as that may be I'm already stretching myself thin on how far I want to go. The villain in the next chapter makes Chrysalis look like a saint in comparison, a villain that even I didn't like writing.
Maybe in the future I'll make a story starring say, Derpy and her struggle with accepting dinky after an unwanted pregnancy. That seems a bit more doable.
4620423
boooring
4620369
Also Celestia would not have won a confrontation there. Chrysalis has shown before to be nearly on par with her and the addition of thousands of worker and soldier drones around would have been bad
Wellllll that's not strictly true. That was the writers taking the 'true love conquers all' cliche and turning it on it's head. Her surprise at her tempory victory makes it clear that isn't her normal strength
4629646
I think the technical term is 'worfing' but that entire season finale was a giant plot hole filled mess. If she knew she couldn't at least fight Celestia on equal footing she would have never revealed herself but at the same time 1 unicorn guard was enough to push her over.
But then a horribly weakened cadence helps a drained shining win at the last second with a love barrier which Chrysalis says 'what a ridiculous sentiment' despite the fact that said sentiment helped her worf Celestia earlier >.>.
Going on a side tangent though, that entire finale was a mess and the comics being non-canon makes fishing for useful information on how Chrysalis acts and what her real power is difficult. Kinda like dragonball, power levels are stupid inconsistent and only serve are a bad plot point.
4629710
The real Cadence's arrival set a clock on everything. Changelings are a known race to ponies, so with a second Cadence suddenly arriving and showing signs of being imprisoned they would no doubt start testing to see which one was altering her appearence with magic. She couldn't keep hiding, and given how long she'd been draining shining armor's love for Chrysalis was probably having a crazy power trip. She felt like she could take on the world, so she did.
As for a weakened Cadence and Shining armor being able to defeat her, I think the idea was she became overconfident and forgot where all her power came from to begin with. Like most villians her pride was her downfall. The entire episode was a play on the true love cliche.
Can't really speak for the comics, not read them, nor have I watched season 4 yet, but I struggle to see why a creature who knows she's close to or more powerful than Celestia bothers with such an elaborate and unnecessary plan. Or why she isn't already in control of Equestria, invading during any of the thousand years of Luna's banishment where Equestria's power was literally halved.
But ultimatly this is AU and I'm horrifically biased when it comes to Celestia and Luna, so it hardly matters, just wanted to give my two cents on the finale, apologies if I caused any irritation.
4630392
NP. I would even say Equestria's power was more than halved during that time as Luna has shown herself to be a better fighter in the flashbacks while Celestia seems to be the better diplomat.
Great work so far, when is the next part coming? I love this alternate universe you have made
4620185 meh Sanity is over rated anyway. Just ask your toaster
5204456
My toaster told me not to trust strangers.
5212138 Is it a KitchenAid? Because you can never believe a word those things say.
5220763
No, it`s homemade. I put the toast in radioactive waste and then eat it. ...You know, I think I`m starting to see the problem. I need to warm up the waste first!
So the new chapter is done(it was actually done a month ago , but I was really too busy to edit it) and I feel, well, disappointed in myself. I know I typically do requests for people, but rape is a very touchy subject for a lot of people and I was very uncomfortable writing in an antagonist that uses his anatomy as a weapon.
This chapter alone will probably garner more downvotes than any other fic I have done, but just know that as a writer I must be able to write anything, even things I feel uncomfortable writing. To the person that requested I do a 'rape-ish' chapter in one of my fics, here, don't expect me to go down this route again anytime soon.
As for the rest of you, well, downvote away.
5260851
Don't worry about the rape part.
People that actually respect your writing shouldn't downvote this because of 1 single touchy subject which isn't even the majority of this chapter.
Also so I don't forget. I did enjoy this chapter.
The beginning was freakin funny.
And even though I personaly think rapers should all just get executed I don't mind it in stories. As long as you know it is all made up.
P.S Make sure Twilight makes Brutalis suffer
I loved this chapter. Drama action and now the power of death itself is knocking at the door and the only thing holding it back is the writer....why must we wait this long to finally have the sweet blood drip from twilights hooves?!?
And the reason she couldn't do the 'cocoon reincarnate' thing is...?
4510829
Since that is the literal definition of a tragedy, you would be correct. Or rather, it won't end well for the main character. Which is why I never read tragedies.
It's always disappointing to see that tag on a story that looks like it could be interesting.