For the record, I thought it was great and would be happy to see more.

I found it enjoyable! I can only imagine what Dash would have to say about being written as a stallion!

Is Cinnamon Swift aware about Lero?

Antagonistic.
"agonistic" would be 'agony'+'istic'.

2866141 I think this is set before Lero. Nightmare Moon was just defeated so probably season1ish

2866187
Agonistic behavior.

So, little grammar things...

Prismatic, rather than prismic.
It's 'pegasus' in the singular, whereas this page uses 'pegasi.'
"another sort—but related" should be "another - but related - sort of"
"As his cock appear, Twilight ran her hoof down along it’s length" should be "As his cock appeared, Twilight ran her hoof along its length" (tense, redundancy, and wrong its)
Should be 'make do' instead of 'make due.'
“would you be so kind as to...?" should have a capital W at the start, since it's not continuing the prior quoted sentence.
"Uh, of course Miss. Sparkle," should be "Uh, of course, Miss Sparkle." (including the ending period, since it's not a 'said' verb immediately after)

2866187>>2866201

That's what I get for not paying more attention to the description. >.>

2866141>>2866195

This takes place in season, which should place it before Lero appears in Equestria, although admittedly I'm not sure I've ever seen a sold date dropped for that.

2866252

: Opps.

Well, someone didn't do much research. I'm surprised Cinny was allowed to use their actual names; you'd think there'd be laws against that sort of thing.

In any case, I'm loving the story thus far. I look forward to more.

2866201 Except we are talking about rational beings in a story, not animals. Antagonistic.
Cinnamon is the protagonist and Star Sparkle is the antagonist.
2866265

Wait more safer? WAY more safer

'way safer'. The suffix 'er' means 'more relative to the current or previous level' so 'way more safer' = 'way more more safe'.
2866273

This takes place in season, which should place it before Lero appears in Equestria

Which season?

2866374

Mother of Celestia,

I am not on my game today.

Season one, is what I meant to say.

I'm enjoying this so far!

2866380 Eh, I had to make 3 corrections to that comment after I posted it. Mistakes happen. It's a fact, no being can be perfect every time. Facts, no point trying to argue with 'em.

Not bad, not bad at all, I hope you'll continue it soon.
Also I can already see Cinnamon face when she realise Twilight is one of herd's foals.

I am SO looking forward to the day she meets Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle. Would she have attended the "Best Young Flyer's competition" soon after the first date and begun to get a glimmer of her mistake?

Why are they stallions? Does Cinny not know their genders or something?

Fun story, looking forward to the next chapter.

2895652
Cinny knows their genders, but as she explains later to Twilight, having a mixed group of ponies is just more marketable.

I pity this poor little pony, following the beating of her nethers straight into Lucent's circus of freaks, snobs and sociopaths.

cinnamon writes r63 fics? ......

.....and she gave this to Star instead of usual assignment? Aaahahahaha!

4252363
A) To Lucent
and B) Not a draft of this particular story