• Member Since 13th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen July 29th

lar_siam


T
Source

Twilight has a problem with her wings she is quite reluctant to admit to.
However, she gets unexpected help when Luna visits her for a stargazing session.



Edited by Zenith042 and Cover Art by SilFoe, thanks!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 29 )

I liked it. :twilightsmile:

:ajsmug:
I liked this; gave me a warm & fuzzy feel.
Like bad_at_names said, yeah, just a bit of polishing needed.

There were some errors in the story, but none of them were too distracting. Overall, I thought that the story was good.

As it has already been pointed out... you do need an editor of sorts. Nevertheless, I quite enjoyed this story. Very cute.

Nice story, and as everyone else has stated, you should get an editor.

This has been incredible cute, good fresh idea, I like it a lot.

Alright, thanks for the comments and feedback, I have to admit, this went better than expected :twilightblush:
Especially after it started off with 4 downvotes and I was like :raritydespair:

Looks like I have to look for someone who shows me how to smooth this stuff out.

Thanks!

The romance seemed mostly left out though and I cant help but feel you should have extended the ending, but overall I liked it a lot.

Very cute! Seemed a little rushed at the end but still very nice. :twilightsmile:

It's pretty ok, but you have a serious problem with incorrect tenses.

I liked the story alright :D

but this error just made me lol

She loved SpikeSpikedsdsdsdsdsddsdsdsdsdsdsdsddsdsdsdsds dearly,

I'm a sucker for good TwiLuna, and this qualifies! Nicely done, and doubly so if this is your first story in English. My real hope is that you'll change the status to "Incomplete" and add more chapters.

2890409

Oops :derpyderp1:

Fixed, thanks!

2890605
Thanks :twilightsmile:
I thought about that and already had one idea or another (moongrazing* anyone?), but I'm not sure I could keep up this… debilitating** plot*.



** Is that the right word? There was a TwiLuna-scene in Archmage where Twilight drops that word, was kind of an inspiration for this story :twilightblush:
* Sorry

Very nice, well-written and... warm, for the lack of better word. Thank you for creating this :3

Even if I firmy believe, that Twilestia is bestia, this was good :raritywink:

I really liked the idea behind this but way to short even for a one-shot, you'll earn a like but it has to little content to earn a favor from here at least. also the whole spike thing was just pointless... it would be fine to just mention he wasn't at home or such... and maybe the ending could be a bit more "clear" in the tub twilight was all unsure but then suddenly so sure with no reasoning whatsoever in between.

A like, fave, and a follow from me!

more, there needs to be more of this.

wondering how awkward it would be if she asked futtershy to help her

MOr oOOr I kill muself

3394628 id say not at all more to the point i think fluttershy wouldnt hesitate to help Twilight with her wings

3394628
5631308
I've seen fics run with that premise too; Tea Time with Alicorn comes to mind as a pleasant slice-of-life example.

6486560 thank you for pointing me towards that fic was a good read

Very nice. I liked the little joke between luna and twilight about telling the princess but like everyone else felt the end was a little rushed.

Ive read this a few times it's a great story :twilightsmile:

Cute story. Second time reading it and it was just as enjoyable as the first time

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