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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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DARN YOU PROTAGONIST WHO COULD GROW A BETTER STACHE IN THE 8th THEN I CAN NOW!
Now, to be more serious, you made shaving a stache highly emotional and symbolic of his new life. *cue slow applause*
Yet another wonderful chapter in this awesome series. Keep the chapters rolling!
I wish I could grow my stache...
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I wish I could grow something more than my virgin mustache ~~
I like my goatee, but my mustache man. This is something that should be burned. Like, literally.
And story, indeed, is great.
nice chapter
As emotional as I found the scene with the mustache to be...it also kind of bothers me. You can't seriously just disregard everything from his old life...they treat humans like cattle here. He's not going to have much of a life here! His focus should be on trying to get back home in some way while avoiding trouble.
I cant get rid of my Mustache. It's comes back fasterr then I can shove it.
but math...
I can grow sideburns that would make Wolverine jealous...but I can't grow a stache to save my life.
3017916 My sideburns cover my cheeks..and they are happy that this has occurred.
Hot dang! This fic is so captevating!!
Ha, I'm growing my own stachebeard combo. HURRAH MY AWESOME MANLY HAIR FACE.
Also, MadMax, I call bullshit on him shaving with a straight razor without cutting himself a couple times. I tried once and now have a scar running down my cheek.
Hold on just a gosh darn second ... If he's italian, and for some reason that's flagging chrsitian to my mind, the wouldn't he be missing a foreskin? Seems that would be rather noticeable since ponies are taking people from the wild and their not cutting that off themselves ...
Oh she is VERY serious about that book. It's going to be soo much fun.
3468124
I know you wrote this comment several weeks ago, but this has been bugging me for a while. Fluttershy should have brought that up, potentially attributing that as another abuse inflicted upon Max.
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3468124
He may or may not be circumsiced. Catholic doctrine doesn't require it, after all.
Everything they know about humans is far from useless and to be thrown in the trash, one anomaly who claims to not even be from the region never means that the regions information on its own residents is useless. Oh well.
3468124 Not necessarily true. Circumcision is usually done at birth more to prevent problems later in adulthood (it's a bit harder to keep clean down there), however it's not restricted to religious beliefs. There are plenty of guys out there who have not been circumcised, so it can go either way.
I'm getting a bit of sideburns and a mustache.
Classic 70's tv show cop bring it on!
I'd have kept the beard.
I love my beard…
Lucky bastard. I was the same way, except my nickname was "Dirty Sanchez"... I'M NOT EVEN FUCKING MEXICAN, I'M IRISH!!!!!!!!!!!
3814887 Lucky you. I was either called "red-face" or "two-face".
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I was called "mango head" or "duck".
Probably because I like mangoes and that my name rhymes with duck in my language.
In my high school days I had many nick names,
Future president of the world
Mustache Meister
Kitty
Tie-man
That's all I remember
My sister called me a d-bag a lot
This motherfucker definitely needs a haircut, bah ha ha ha ha. Brilliant chapter, to be honest they are writing a story... Sought of...
There wasn’t even a toilet .... There was a toilet in one corner
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Read that part again, he's talking about two different rooms. The first one is the laundry room that Twilight tried to convert into a washroom for Spike, the second is the bathroom.
Talk, talk, TALK! DON'T WRITE! TALK! GODDAMN!
3952195 He's unable to talk. You get it later.
This IS twilight we are talking about... of course shes serious!
I think I've been reading too many fan-fics... That sounded WAYYYY worse in my head.
4375455 Is that a ponified Phoenix Wright you have there?
Mustaches never looks good on me, can't grow that shet out at all, but goatees are so...GLORIOUS! Like this story, I like where it's headed.
4375455 Especially with them headed over to applejack's, theres other breeding humans over there!
4375455 now I believe
That it was better in your head
Because I'm actually a psychopathic murderer, why else?
I really want to make a reference, but I have nothing to work with
I wouldn't have thought about if you didn't say anything, but it will now bother me for the rest of my life. The things that keep me up at night aren't thing like war, poverty etc., it's "what is Twilight hiding about the razor?" I live a sad life.
It's no fun when you give it to me.
I hate you.
Yes you do.
You mean they can't?
This goes nowhere, and that's a shame.
"As the hair fell from my face, I remember the good times, and the bad times, of my past life. As I shaved, I remember my hopes, my dreams, my fantasies. I remember everything that had made me who I was. And as I cleared the last patch of hair from my lip, I let it all go."
Well that is one hell of a way to think of your mustache.
me
The main character is almost exactly like me, minus the name. Even the Italian Heritage I have. Is this my Doppelgänger?
I like the thing about his 'stache... but it could have been more effective, more implied, more show than tell.
Literally, in the first scene we're told his mustache is a piece of his identity and what it represents, he's shaving it off in a moment of symbolic tabula rasa.
Oh wait. No, it's NOT symbolic. Not really. I don't think it counts as symbolism when the narrative is neatly telling the audience word for word that these things represent this and that, which we're told means that and this and the other thing.
How much better would it have been if we found out in the first chapter about the 'stache, found out more about him before chucking him into Equestria? Or mayb he could have mentioned it passingly in little asides about his own life in the previous chapters.
That way, when he comes in this chapter to his mustache, you only need to tell us that he hesitates a moment, staring at it in the mirror forlornly... and then whisks it away.
That way, the audience puts it together THEMSELVES what the scene and act are meant to represent. Something simple, succinct, but fairly powerful or moving if done right. Yes, it relies on your properly establishing the mustache beforehand, but the payoff would work so much better. It's such a missed opportunity to make a decent idea great!
At least he can get something proper on his face. I tried letting it got for a week, looked like some sketchy mexican drug dealer at the end of it....it wasnt a pretty sight.
During this chapter I had this song stuck in my head, so I figured I would share.
shaving off a beard and mustache makes a dramatic change in appearance. Twilight should have at least made note of that, if not be completely surprised.
>>Hoshizora
Yep, look at Jack Whitehall with and without facial hair.
Yes. Yes she is
one manly tear was shed for that mustache
5631958 In my case, many manly tears were shed. A mustache THAT self defining should NEVER be shaved.
I once grew my moustache out. 3 days of picking hair out of my teeth and I was done with it. But still, hard to see such a sentimental feature go.
Ahhh, I love my moustache and beard
Makes me look like a serial killer
My friend said I should never get a trench coat since I already looked like I was two seconds from going Postal
After watching Doctor Who though, I really want a trench coat or a duster
And a bow tie
And a fez
5900457 Dont have a mustcahe yet, will have one soon though :P
5989658 My beards always look hideous. :'(
Ahhh man, onto that subject. I had started growing my beard around when I was twelve...
don't ask how, I just did. Started out as a tiny mustache, now I have a full on scraggily beard and shit.
Its fucking mayhem to shave, I tell you what xD
Nice job man!
TO FRIENDSIES!