• Member Since 28th Apr, 2013
  • offline last seen 10 hours ago

NightShadow76


T

This was to be my second fic, but I've put it on the back burner long enough. Still working on my technique, but I'm getting there. The other tag is for the fact that the hell hound is not my work, but the name is. I own nothing, but the story and the name.

Riddick was being threaten, and the hellhound had to help his new friend. He killed the merc., but at the cost of his own life. As he bleed out, Riddick looked at his now dying friend with anger, regret, and sorrow in his shining eyes, and covered the hound in a tarp, to protect him somewhat from Crematoria's sun. The hellhound wakes to find, not the empty blackness that many think they would see in death, but a sunlit forest.

Crossover with Chronicles of Riddick, incase you didn't get the memo, watch the deleted scenes if you have the DVD.

All charaters belong to their respective owners.

The sex tag is a maybe, don't expect to much if at all.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 12 )

Oh my Celestia plz keep up the awesome work

I'm working on a Riddick fic myself, and I got say this is really good so far. I'm trying to work in a part to where I can have a hellhound in the story, but only time will tell if an idea strikes me. Keep it up.:moustache:

You have my attention.
That means I like this:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

I see potential... Raw and undiluted, yet only partially refined. This potential could become a piece of art... or a piece of slag. I will not know for sure until you continue it.

One word of advice, however, do NOT make him too strong to fight. Such a character will never be in any danger or will be the only hope of his friends and fellow adventurers. You can easily ruin this story by making it take a path that has been seen and failed far too many times.

I would also ask you to avoid having Ocean Blaze fight Rainbowdash and win. It is typical for the scenario you write and leads to an overpowered character that is boring to read about. I think it would be much more fun to have Rainbowdash immediately get along with the guy, much to the surprise of the mane six and the readers. If you want someone to react hostily make it somepony we wouldn't normally see like pinkie pie, spike, or even Angel Bunny... feel free to use that idea if you like.

I am not sure if this piece of advise holds weight but since this is an adventure story, consider not making the adventure about anything that puts the fate of equestria in peril. If you are going to make a problem that starts an adventure make it personal, that way it makes sense why Celestia wouldn't deal with it herself. Maybe provide false evidence that Riddick came to this world and the hound seeks him out. Just make the source of adventure reasonable is my suggestion.

That's all the feedback I got. Good luck.

3955449

You don't have to worry about 'the fate the world' coming into play.:twilightsmile: Since this is more about the animal POV, that won't happen, but Ponyville's fate might come into play.:applejackunsure: Thanks for the advice though.

OH MY LUNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS COOL!!:rainbowdetermined2: CONTINUE!!!!!!

Ooh here's a thought.... What is gonna be the reaction of the other girls at first sight????

they really need to put some luna emotocons in here.

I hope this story isn't dead, I would love to see this continue.

5812567
I'm trying to work out the next chapter now that I have a laptop, so no it isnt

Update? Sorry, didn't mean to be rude

Update this please this is the first story I have found with winona actually having the ability to talk to other animals.

Where's next chapter ?

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