Behind Closed Doors

by OrphiusOlyandra

Chapter 13

This shit would have been hilarious in the right situation. Back in the Kingdom, if I’d read something like this I would have laughed my ass off at the sheer stupid dripping off the page. Instead, I found myself seething and grinding my teeth. The worst part was that there were ponies out there who would believe that crap.

“Tell me you don’t believe that shit,” I growled and glanced up at Dash. “This couldn’t have gotten published. This is some prank you’re pulling on me, right?”

“Nope,” she panted, still not fully recovered from her laughing. “Did you read the part about Luna actually being Nightmare Moon in disguise? As if, we blasted her in the face with the elements! This awesomeness? Nothing could survive it.”

“Uh huh.” I looked back down at the paper. On the front cover was a picture of Canterlot Castle with Nightmare Moon superimposed in the background of it. “This has to be the stupidest fucking conspiracy I’ve ever heard of. Are there seriously ponies who actually believe this shit?”

“Oh yeah, big bits in this. I love how it was all like ‘Our anonymous source has told us that there is evidence of a secret alliance between the fallen gryphons and Luna in an attempt to get more meat’ or whatever the buck that last bit was,” chuckled Dash.

“Who the fuck are ‘the fallen gryphons’ meant to be anyway?” I muttered and tossed the paper to the table. “Whoever wrote that should be bloody hung.”

“Who knows, but it’s bucking hilarious. Come on, you didn’t even finish it!” She pushed the paper towards me. “Tell me you at least read the bit about how you teleported in and crap. They think Luna wants to make you the new Queen of the Gryphon Kingdoms. You. Queen. As if!”

“I got to that bit, and I just couldn’t deal with it anymore.” I answered her with an eye roll. “I had to stop before I got infected with retardedness or something.”

“Come on, it’s hilarious!”

“No it’s not, Dash!” I snapped and jabbed a claw at the paper. “Ponies believe this shit! It’s four pages of bullshit lies and hate that make the lives of every refugee coming into Canterlot that much harder than it needs to be!”

“Whoa, chill G, it’s only a small group that believes this shit.”

“This is the Equestrian Herald, Dash! It’s one of the biggest papers in the country! If they’ve actually taken the time to publish crap like that, it means that they think it’s credible! They think that the ponies who read it deserve to know about their utterly stupid crap.”

“Okay, so it’s not that funny, but it’s still pretty funny.” Dash shrugged and stretched. “You could always hold a press conference thingie and tell them how stupid they are.”

“Me? At a press conference?” I gave her a flat look.

“Good point, your awesomeness isn’t enough to draw them in like moths to a flame. Not like me that is.”

“That wasn’t my point.” I muttered. “Besides, giving this shit a serious response just gives it more credibility. Most sentients view a government denying something as a signed confession anyway.”

“Which is why my Empire would be awesome. I mean, come on! Ruled by me? Best. Nation. Ever.” She grinned at me. “Of course you’d have a spot there, along with Trixie, if you must bring her along.”

Dash mentioning Trixie just made me wonder what she was doing right now. It’d only been one day, so Trixie was fine, wasn’t she? Shifting in my seat, I turned back to my fish fillet burger and took another bite. I knew I was seeing her this afternoon, but I’d definitely rather eat lunch with Trixie than Dash. My lunch break was only half an hour though, so I’d barely have the time to get to our apartment and back, let alone actually eat anything.

“What are you even still doing in Canterlot?” I glanced at her. “Don’t you have a job in Ponyville?”

“Eh, Luna gave me two week long break and I plan on using every single last day of it. Running the weather is so tiiiiiiiiring. So not worth it, even if it pays well.”

I snorted and took another bite of my burger. “And that’s why any country run by you would burn down in seconds. Economic collapse? Rebellion? Another country invading? Fuck off, I’m napping.”

“Sure you are,” she said flatly. “Hey, when you actually have time off, you should drop by Ponyville again.”

“Not a good idea,” I replied. “Seriously, part of my deal with not getting axed by Celestia is that I have to stay away from Ponyville and your friends. Honestly, I’m surprised she didn’t have me knifed after Shutterfly came at me that one time.”

“Just let me talk to Twilight and I’ll have that all cleared up in no time. Who knew having connections was so good?” She took a bite out of her daisy sandwich. “But yeah, she’s probably afraid you’d kill Pinkie or something.”

I shuddered. “I have no idea how you can even stand her.”

“The trick is to listen to what she says, not the actual words. Once you get that down, it’s fine.”

“Yeah, I just don’t think I could deal with anyone that annoying. Seriously, just that one talk with Shutterfly was testing me. Is she really like that all the time? Getting her to answer a direct freaking question was like trying to get blood out of a rock.”

“Hey, I don’t get to make fun of Trixie and you don’t get to make fun of Fluttershy,” she said with a glare.

I shrugged. “I wasn’t making fun, dude, just trying to figure out how you of all ponies got so... mellow.”

“Um. What? Mellow? Are you insane?”

“Yeah, mellow,” I repeated. “In Flight School you were a complete bitch. Compared to the way you were back then, you’re practically nice. I mean, you’re still kind of a jerk, but nothing like you were.”

“Hey! I wasn’t that bad. You were worse.”

“That time with Summer?” I glanced across at Dash. “Seriously, you remember what happened to her, right?”

“That was your idea.” She glared at me and stood up. “Whatever, I’m leaving.”

“Dash, don’t be like that.” I rolled my eyes. “I’m saying it’s a good thing you’re not a complete tool anymore. I’m not saying I was any better, heck, I was probably worse, but I can’t say I honestly thought you were going to be the type who’d be friends with someone like Pinkie.”

“She’s annoying beyond belief, but once you get used to it, it’s not as bad as it seems,” she said with a shrug.

“I seriously doubt that.”

“At least give her a chance.”

I found myself glancing at my reflection in the window, and I was proud that I didn’t react when I saw Grace staring back at me. “Probably not a good idea.”

“I doubt that. Come on G, if you can hang with Trix, you can hang with Pinks.”

“Trix was different.” I looked back at Dash. “The way we met was... well, let’s just say it’s still a state secret. We couldn’t not get along after that.”

“Of course it is.”

“Seriously, it is.” I glanced back at my reflection, but it was just me this time. “I’m not allowed to talk about any of it.”

“You suck.”

“You can stop hanging out with me any time you want,” I replied.

“As if, no one else came even come close to keeping up with me.”

I snorted. “Then I guess that means the moment you become a Wonderbolt I’ll be out the door on my ass.”

“Nah, but once I become a Wonderbolt, you can worship me. A temple or two would be enough.”

“I’ve had more than enough temples to last me a lifetime, dude.” I stood up and turned to face Dash. ‘Anyway, I probably better get back to training.”

“Need me to come along? I can still kick flank you know.”

“Sure you can,” I replied. “If you want to come, I haven’t really got a problem with that, but just don’t get in the way.”

“Sweet. Do I get to kick some flank?” She sounded way too eager.

“No. There’s no ‘flank kicking’ happening at all. This is real training, dude. You don’t just wail on someone you’re teaching and expect them to learn from it. You gotta have them practice drills and technique and shit.”

“Boooooooring. I think I’ll pass then.”

I shrugged. “I might get them to do some sparring after if you want.”

“Sweet. Alright, so coming along now.” She hopped onto her hooves and tossed some bits onto the table. “Lead the way.”

I snorted, and gave her a smirk. “If you can keep up with me.”

“Piece of cake.”

I just grinned and stepped through my shadow, appearing twenty metres down the street. Ponies stared at me in shock, and I realised shadow walking in public might not have been the best idea... Shit. This is last time I let myself get in trouble for Dash.

“The gryphons are here to get us!” shrieked one pony before fainting.

I blinked in shock, and stared at the feinted pony. “What? No, that’s comple-”

All of a sudden panic broke out and ponies began running in all directions screaming their heads off. A stallion stumbled out of his chair trying to get away, a pegasus spread their wings and took off faster than I could, and a mother shrieked and threw herself over her own foal for protection. Herd instinct took over, and ponies just bolted for safety like someone set their tails on fire.

All I could do was stare in disbelief, and groan before facepalming. “Fucking ponies,” I growled.

“Huh.” Dash landed next to me, looking at the empty street. “Dude, I should totally bring you along next time I have some boring weather meeting.”

“I don’t even... I mean... I just... What the [b[FUCK?!” I roared and held my claws out at the empty street. “How does that make sense?! How?!”

“Hey, don’t look at me, I’m ju-”

“S-Stop right there!” I glanced over my shoulder and groaned at the sight of a couple ponies holding makeshift weapons and pointing them at me. “D-Don’t move or... or... or we’ll have to take y-you down! Y-Yeah!”

I stared at them for a moment, clenching my talons before I just shook my head. “Whatever.” Turning away, I walked past Dash and up the street. “I have to get to work.”

There was a strong breeze and when I looked over my shoulder again, there was Dash holding one of the metal pipes the unicorn had in her hooves. “Yeah, I wouldn’t try that again if I were you. Next time, I’ll be returning this to you and trust me, it will hurt. A lot.” Dash tossed the pipe onto the ground and turned around. “Come on G, let’s get out of this dump.”

“They just swung that at the back of my fucking head,” I growled as I spread my wings and took to the air. “You can fucking kill someone doing that!”

“Actually, they threw it at the back of your head.” I glanced down and there was Dash flying upside down with her hooves behind her head. “You should have seen it too. Sweet as catch I made, that was Grade A awesome material right there.”

“Dash. The entire damn street panicked because a gryphon did something mildly freaky.” I looked back ahead. “Which means a lot of ponies took that fucking newspaper seriously. Which means that shit you were laughing so hard at earlier, isn’t fucking funny!”

“Nah, it’s still pretty damn funny. Hey, next time I’m hungry, think you can come with? Rarity keeps talking about those fancy-smancy restaurants and I bet I can get a table easy as breathing if you came along. Bring Trixie even! Make it into a date for you two. Look, no reservations!”

“Dude, there’s no way in Tartarus that I’m bringing you on a date with Trixie. I’d just go to a restaurant on my own. Besides... Trixie and I are... trying to keep a little distance at the moment.”

“Wait, what? I thought you were totally whipped by her.” And like typical Dash, she had to make the sound effect to go with it. “What happened?”

“It’s... complicated.”

“Come on G, from the way you talked about her, I thought you were going to propose or something.” She flipped over and looked at me seriously. “Seriously, what’s going on?”

“Look Dash, I get that you’re just trying to help but what’s happening between me and Trixie is between me and Trixie.” I gave her a look. I’m not sure what look it was, but it was a look that I’m hoping was strong enough to make her drop it. “I really don’t want to talk about it, alright?”

“Geez, you haven’t changed one bit have you?” She rolled her eyes. “Anyways, where we headed?”

“The palace,” I replied, slowing down and angling left.

“Don’t look now, but it seems like we’ve got some guards on our tail,” said Dash. “You wanna ditch them?”

“I am a guard, remember?” I glanced across at her. “Just ignore them, and we’ll take care of it when we get there.”

“You say that, but they’re closing in pretty damn fast,” she replied glancing over her shoulder. “I’m pretty certain they want us to stop.”

“Fuck, I’m gonna be late.” I growled and slowed down before landing in the middle of a street and turning around to face the guards. “I swear to the goddesses, if they try to arrest me I’m just gonna snap.”

The first guard approached cautiously. “Excuse me sir, we’re going to need you to come with us. Your fillyfriend as well.”

My left eye twitched and Dash collapsed on the ground laughing her head off while clutching her stomach.

“I. Am. FEMALE!” I roared, and took a step towards him.

“It’s a term of respect, sir,” he replied flatly. “Now, will you come with us or will force be necessary?”

“How about I snap off your cock and make you eat it!” I growled. “Why the fuck do you even want to arrest me?!”

“This is not an arrest, this is an enquiry into the disturbance on the corner of Blot Street and West Alicorn Street from which a gryphon and pegasus matching your description was seen escaping. Now, do you wish to come silently or will we be forced to arrest you for impeding a potential criminal investigation?” he growled, his wings unfurling as he readied to fight.

“Fucking try it, asshole,” I hissed. “You’ll be shitting your teeth out into a hospital bed pan.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, calm down.” Dash was suddenly on her hooves and between me and the guard. “Seriously, calm down G. Let’s just go with them to the castle and get everything sorted out there.”

“I am not getting arrested for doing nothing!” I snapped. “There is no good reason for me to play twenty questions with these racist pieces of shit.”

“Okay, that’s it, in the nam-”

“Oh shut up!” yelled Dash, “I’m trying to keep you safe here. Seriously G, we’re going to the castle anyways, so we might as well go together.”

“So you’re saying she’s dangerous,” growled the pegasus and his partner immediately bought out the hoofcuffs.

“I’ll break you in half with my bare claws!” I shouted, and took a step towards him. “Your funeral will be closed casket!”

“No!” Dash pressed a hoof against my chest. “Calm down G, calm down! Trixie will murder you if you end up in jail again.”

Dash was right. I closed my eyes, and took a deep breath and said, “If that prick even thinks about putting those cuffs on me, he’ll be the one that wears them.”

“Okay? That good? You good? She’s coming along willingly, no need for cuffs,” said Dash tensely.

The guard opened his mouth to reply, when a nightkin landed on the street next to us. She immediately saluted me. “Capt- Serg- Uh... Specialist Gilda, Ma’am. Your presence has been requested at the palace.”

“If I was a specialist, you wouldn’t have to salute me,” I told her flatly.

“I-I uh... I don’t know what your rank is.” She admitted sheepishly. “But your presence has been requested by Luna at the palace.”

“I’m sorry, but this gryphon is currently under investigation,” said the guard. “Do you have a written order from Princess Luna?”

She blinked in surprise. “No I don’t... Are you... are you serious? How stupid are you?”

“Well then I am afraid we must escort the gryphon to the castle,” he said flatly.

“I...” She shook her head, “Look, whatever it is can wait. Princess Luna wants her, she’s getting her, and if one of us has to explain to her why Gilda’s late, I will not be the one doing it.”

“I’m afraid not. The gryphon is coming with us and that is the end of that.”

“My name is Gilda, your racist cock-sucker!” I snapped at him. “Gilda! If you weren’t clearly so retarded you can’t even read, you might have seen my name in a newspaper sometime!”

“Regardless, you are not above the law no matter how famous you are,” he said though his partner did look a tad uneasy.

“Well then how about Rainbow Dash, that ring a bell?” Dash took a step forward. “Or will I have to talk to Celestia about how you’re impeding official business? Hm?”

“Um...” He swallowed nervously and glanced between us. “Regardless, the law is the law.”

I stared at him in disbelief for a moment before I took a step forward. “That’s it. I need to kill him. Someone’s gotta take this fucker out of the gene pool.”

“Need help?” asked Rainbow.

“Hey, hey!” The nightkin jumped between us and them. “Is this really necessary? Look, let’s just all go to the palace, and then when we see Luna she can tell these idiots off.”

“I dunno, I think I’d be doing the world a favour,” I growled.

Dash sighed and shook her head. “As much as I agree, we really should just go.”

“Let’s just get out of here,” I growled. “Fucker’s lucky I’ve got a marefriend.”

“That’s not me. Seriously, as if I’d date you,” muttered Dash. “I have higher standards than that.”

We took off in a group, heading for the palace which was just a couple of blocks away. The moron guard kept a close eye on me the entire time, and it was barely a minute before we landed in the palace court yard.

I couldn’t help but grin when I saw Luna standing there, completely pissed off. Just seeing her mad put me in a good mood.

Immediately the nightkin ran towards her, I seriously needed to learn her name. Falling into a bow in front of Luna, the nightkin said, “I apologise for the delay, Princess Luna, but these guards were trying to arrest Cap-Lieut- Serg... Miss Gilda.”

“Oh is that so?” Luna turned to look at the two guards. “Ah, We know of thou. We shall be speaking to thy commander about this insolence.”

The two didn’t even have time to bow before they scrambled out of sight. A little piece of me was disappointed that I didn’t get to hit them, but in general I was just happy to see Luna pissed off and pissed off at them.

“And Bearer of Loyalty, it is a pleasure to meet thee again,” said Luna with a polite inclination of her head.

“Hey Luna, coming back to Ponyville for Nightmare Night again?”

“That is the plan, yes.”

“Sweet, I’ll let the others know.” She looked at the nightkin. “I take it I should go?”

“That would be preferable, yes.”

“Well G, looks like this is as far as I go, try not to kill anyone,” said Dash.

“See you around,” I bumped her hoof before she flew off. Turning to Luna, I asked, “What did you want?”

“Walk with me,” she said. “Silent Night, thou art dismissed.”

That was her name! Silent Night gave a bow and trotted away.

“Not even curious about why the guards were trying to arrest me?” I asked as I walked along next to Luna, still in a decent mood.

“No doubt it had something to do with thy use of magic in public,” she said flatly.

“Fucking racists,” I muttered.

“Regardless, We thought We had asked thou to keep a low profile,” she sighed.

I shrugged. “Whoops.”

Luna rolled her eyes. “And now We have the unfortunate job of holding a press conference to explain everything. A conference thou will be present for.”

Good mood gone. “...Fuck.”

“Correct. Luckily for thee, Celestia feels thou art too much of a ‘loose cannon’ to be allowed to answer questions therefore thou shall stay silent throughout the entire ordeal,” she said.

“Fuck that noise.” I snorted. “I don’t need you to speak for me.”

“Take it up with Celestia,” she replied flatly.

“What does she even think I’ll do?” I muttered. “Take a shit on stage or something?”

“Unfortunately, that does not require thou to speak,” she said.

I rolled my eyes. “How did you even hear about me using magic so fast?”

“We know all, much like Our sister.”

“Sure you do. What’s my favourite colour?”

“Irrelevant,” she said as she stopped by the nightkin barracks. “Prepare thyself for the meeting. It will be held in the main courtroom in thirty minutes.”

“Yay.” After a second I added, “Will Trixie be there?”

“Do you wish her to be there?”

I hesitated then nodded.

“She’s waiting for thou in the barracks, I shall send Eclipse along to ensure it.” She chuckled and shook her head. “We doubt We would be able to stop her from coming either way.”

I didn’t even bother sticking around to hear what Luna said. The moment she said Trixie was in the barracks, I turned around and walked through the doors.

“Trixie?” I looked around for her, moving towards my little side room.

“Gotcha!” She slammed into me from the side, throwing us on to the bed with her on top of me. “Excited to see me? Otherwise you’d never let yourself be caught out like that.”

“Saw you the moment I walked in,” I lied with a grin. Wrapping my arms around her, I shifted around and she yelped in surprise as I claimed top. “Just didn’t say anything.”

“Suuuuuuuure you did.” Both hooves were wrapped around my neck and I was brought down into a kiss and I know we were together just yesterday, but goddesses it felt like it’d been so long since we did this. Eventually she pulled back, licking her lips before winking at me playfully. “And you really enjoy being on top don’t you?”

She might have been right about that. There was something kinda fun about pinning Trixie beneath me, kinda like winning a wrestle. “Speaking of which, we’re in a bed, and we’ve got half an hour to kill...”

She cocked an eyebrow up at me. “We’re in the barracks. Where it’s open. In public. In someone else’s bed.”

I just grinned wider.

“You are a perv.” She kicked my leg out from under me and rolled us over so that she was on top. “Very well then, let the Great and Powerful Trixie put on a show you’ll never forget.”

I blinked in surprise, and stared up at her. “Really? Right now?”

She gave me a sultry grin, hooves running over my chest as she leaned in close to whisper in my ear, “Right. Now.”

I blushed and swallowed, averting my gaze. “I didn’t think you’d actually go for it, Trix.”

She nipped my neck playfully. “And Trixie wins yet again.” She hopped off me and walked away with a delicious sway of her hips. “Trixie always wins.”

It was seriously hard to be mad at her for that. Didn’t stop me from giving it my best shot as I rolled off the bed and padded after her. “You’re a freaking tease, Trix.”

“You started it.” Her tail whacked me in the face. “Now come on, we need to get you ready for your debut.”

“Please don’t call it that,” I muttered as I stepped into my room before throwing open the chest at the end of the bed. “Seriously, it makes it sound like I’m some kind of model, actor, or some other kind of professional useless person.”

“With the way you look in a suit? You’d definitely qualify as a model.” She immediately slipped into my bed, snuggling under the covers before drawing out a large, rolled up poster from somewhere. “A little gift to spruce up the area. Posters of yours truly of course.”

I grinned at the way that was both thoughtful, and horrifyingly egotistical at the same time. “Thanks, Trix.” The poster was set down on my side stand, and I started putting all the armour on. “Hey, did you bring my knife like I asked you to?”

“Of course, it’s on your table. Also, take the armor off,” she said. “And Trixie has another gift for you.”

I glanced over my shoulder, and saw the knife just where she said it was. Blinking in surprise, I said, “I know that wasn’t there when I came in,” before I shrugged and began taking off the armour again.

“Maaaaagic,” she chuckled as she bought out another roll of parchments. This time they were smaller and bound in a red ribbon, perfectly matching her cheeks. “Hide these well, they are... private...”

“Why what’s on ‘em?” I grabbed one of them out of her magic and untied the ribbon. My face coloured as I saw a picture of Trixie with her... “That’s...” I coughed and rolled it up, tying the red ribbon back around. “That’s a... I... Hey, Dash took me to this great sandwich place.”

“Do you have a fetish for sandwiches?” she asked.

I coughed into my claw. “Uh... no?”

“You sure about that?” She cocked an eyebrow at me. “I won’t judge.”

“Pretty sure,” I muttered and turned around, reaching for my armour again.

“No, bad!” She glared at me. “Also, get some less bulky armor.”

“I need to get ready for this stupid press conference, don’t I?” I held up the breast plate and showed it to her. “And what do you mean bulky? This stuff’s light as.”

“More form fitting. That makes you look too bulky. Something a bit slimmer and... well...” She coughed into her hoof, face completely red. “Let’s just say Trixie shouldn’t show up here when you’re in it.”

I smirk touched the corner of my beak. “You’re totally thinking of one of those chain mail bra’s they wear in those stupid comics, aren’t you?”

“Please, Trixie is not such a novice, how dare you suggest such a thing! You just look like a square block in that thing rather than showing off your... features.”

“The whole point of wearing armour is keeping my ‘features’ safe, Trix.”

“It can do both! Just something more shapely is all.” She huffed, wrapping my blanket around her body. “And you don’t want to show up in armor. That’ll make you seem too... aggressive and military.”

“Isn’t that the point, though? I joined the guard, Trix, I’m supposed to be military.” I shrugged. “And... honestly, would wearing armour really make me seem any more aggressive than I am?”

“Trust me, Luna got me to get you ready for a reason. Oh! And on dress...” She ducked under the covers, ruffling around for a couple of seconds before popping back up with some fabric in her hooves. “Wear this.”

Holding the cloth up in front of me, I couldn’t help but stare at it for a moment, my eye twitching before I snorted out a laugh. “Yeah... no.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Gilda... put it on.”

“It’s a cape.” I said flatly. “I’m not wearing this.”

“There’s nothing wrong with capes! It’ll make you look majestic.”

I held it out towards Trixie. “It has your cutie mark as the pin holding the... lapel things together. And Luna’s cutie mark is on the back! Seriously, no way I’m going anywhere in this.”

She coughed and looked away. “Only because they wouldn’t let Trixie put her cutie mark on the back.”

“Trix... did you make this?” I frowned at it and inspected the ridiculous cape again. “I didn’t know you could sew.”

“Trixie might have had some help, but she did spend her life on the road. Mending things is useful.” She frowned and peered at me. “Actually, don’t wear it, it’ll make you look pretentious and snobby. Hm....”

“Just wear my suit?” I suggested after a moment.

Her eye twitched. “Do you want to leave this room in the next twenty minutes?”

I coughed into my claw and turned away. “Alright then... Should I just go wearing nothing?”

“This is high class.” With my sheets still wrapped up around her, she slipped out of the bed and began rummaging through my chest. “Hm... Actually, I think we might be able to pull this off. Put on the gauntlets and greaves, as well as the wing guards.”

“No breastplate?” I asked. “Kinda no point in wearing armour if you’re not gonna keep the part of you with the most squish organs safe.”

“This is for show and the breastplate is too bulky. This keeps you nice and slim, but shows off you are in the guard. Maybe if they had some of the ceremonial stuff the guards around the castle wear, but apparently not.”

I glanced over at Trixie, my eyebrow raised. “So uh... why are you wearing my blanket?”

“Well you sleep in this. No? This way when you sleep, you can at last still smell Trixie’s fabulous floral scent and her patented shampoo.” And with those words, she hopped back onto my bed. “Now hurry up, put those on.”

I just stared at her for a moment, and shook my head. “Sometimes I don’t even know which one of us is crazier.”

“There’s no fun in being sane!” She made a shooing gesture at me. “Come on, change!”

Smiling and feeling only a little worried, I turned around and started to pull on the bits of armour Trixie has suggested. “Don’t worry, Trix, you’re a long way from being boring. Also, you don’t smell like flowers, more like... firework powder.”

“Is that an insult? Also, turn around. It’s not like I haven’t seen you getting dressed before.”

“I know, but usually when you watch me get dressed we end up making out for like, twenty minutes.” I paused. “Wait, why wouldn’t I want that?” Turning to face her, I pulled on the last of the armour. It felt weird having my chest and back bare while wearing the rest of the suit. “And it wasn’t an insult, it’s just... you know, the way you smell.”

“As long as it reminds you of Trixie.” I felt her eyes raking over every single last inch of my body and the way she licked her lips was certainly not helping. “Just twenty minutes? Sure you don’t mean twenty hours?”

“We better get going to Luna’s stupid conference.” Rolling my shoulders, I rose up onto my hind legs. “This feels seriously weird without the breast plate.”

Her eyes immediately went down my front, that predatory glint in her eyes. “You look great like that. Maybe if the armor pieces were more ceremonial than bulky it’d work even better, but it’s passable.”

“I’m telling you this isn’t even close to being ‘bulky’,” I muttered and fell back to all fours. “Compared to normal gryphon plate, this is pretty much tin foil.”

“Regardless, something lighter would be even better.” Trixie paused and tilted her head to the side. “Do you think I’d look hot in armor?”

I glanced over at Trixie and pictured her in a stupid comic book style set of skimpy chainmail complete with pointlessly short skirt, standing on top of a pile of bad guys with a sexy smirk and a few flecks of blood on her face and in her mane. I’m freaking ashamed of just how much that aroused me.

“Y-you’d look alright,” I turned away and walked out of the room.

“Just alright?” She followed after me. “Trixie would be totally hot. Then again, Trixie would be hot in anything.”’

“Come on, we need to hurry or we’ll be late.” I picked up the pace and started to jog towards the palace.

“Running. Always running,” sighed Trixie as she trotted next to me.

“I thought you liked excitement. Normal is boring, right?”

“Eh, occasional boring would be nice,” she said with a shrug. “Just spend all day in bed...”

I blinked in surprise and glanced at her before looking back ahead. “You thought that was boring? I mean, we mixed it up didn’t we? There was that bit where we tried it on the floor. That totally wasn’t boring, uncomfortable, not really that much fun, but definitely not boring.”

“N-No, that wasn’t boring. None of it was boring.” Her cheeks were completely red and she pulled her hat down so it covered her face. “Trixie just meant that if it was constantly exciting then we wouldn’t get a chance to do any of that.”

“Personally, I’d take boring over the usual crap any day.”

“A bit of excitement would be nice every so often.”

To be honest, I’m not sure how I’d handle it if things were boring. I was a full fledged adrenaline junky, the more dangerous, the better. I always complained about wanting things to be normal, but really, would I actually be able to deal with that? Even over the last year with Trixie in Canterlot, there’d been troubles and tensions, and always things for me to focus on and keep an eye out for. Sure, the lingering death threat hanging over my head sucked, but... would I even be able to live without it?

“Hopefully,” I muttered.

“Then again, considering what happened the other day, the bedroom should be plenty of excitement,” she smirked, bumping hips with me.

“Seriously, why didn’t we do that before?” I smirked, leading the way up some stairs out of the palace gardens.

“Because you like sandwiches,” she replied flatly.

I blushed and coughed into my claw as we entered the castle itself. “I think that joke’s getting old now.”

“Trixie is merely curious.” She stopped me by the big doors to the throne room and immediately began fussing over me, brushing my shoulders, polish my armor with her cape and straightening my crown feathers. “Okay, don’t do anything too stupid.”

“Trix, please. As if I’d do anything else.” I rolled my eyes. “But seriously, all I have to do is keep my beak shut and let Luna do the talking.”

“You make that sound easier than it is,” she shot back.

I shrugged. “Whatever.” Pushing the door open, I glanced back at her. “You’ll be there, right?”

“I can join you up there if you want...”

I hesitated. “Maybe that’s not a good idea...”

“It’s up to you.” She leaned up and kissed me lightly on the beak. “But either way, a kiss for good luck.”

“Thanks,” I smiled at her, before pushing the door the rest of the way open and stepping inside.

The room was already full of ponies, reporters judging by the hats, cameras and notepads. They were all sitting around, chatting among themselves and getting ready to take down everything that happens. The moment I opened the door, the ones in the rows closest spotted me and started with the questions. Than the rest of them heard and saw the comotion, and in seconds there was a frenzy of dumb fucks in my face and jabbering questions.

I just set my shoulders and started to push through them towards Celestia and Luna, up on their thrones. Just listening to the constant stream of shit spewing from their mouths was enough to give me a headache long before I even got there. I was just glad none of them tried to stop me moving forward.

When I finally pushed myself out of the hoard and up the steps towards Luna and Celestia, I couldn’t help but curse to myself, “Fucking scumbags.”

“Be glad they are not nobles,” whispered Luna.

“Would it really be that bad if I hurt them?” I replied, and positioned myself next to and a step behind her. “Not all of them, just enough to let the rest know we’re not taking shit.”

Celestia gave me a look that made the feathers on the back of my neck stand up. Just then I realised I’d never actually met Celestia before, and I felt a churning in my gut. The way she was looking at me was not like one pony talking to another, or even condescending racism, it was the way a farmer would look at a rabid dog it was thinking of putting down.

Her gaze turned to Luna. “Please ensure that does not happen. As amusing as you’d find it, the fallout would be enormous.”

“Please Celly, t’was merely a joke,” said Luna with a shrug. “Perhaps thou art the one in need for schooling about modern society.”

“Your sense of humor has always been rather dark, sister.” Celestia looked back ahead. “Are you telling me you wouldn’t find it funny if the roof were to collapse and crush them all?”

“Now, now, was thou not complaining about these very same nobles just last week and how thou just wished some of them would be silenced,” she chuckled.

A tiny smile tugged at the corner of Celestia’s mouth. “I would have one blissful day of silence, before I was once more faced with the arduous task of rebuilding a government.”

“Ah, to think of the days where nobles were actually noble. How great the mighty have fallen.” Luna shook her head sadly. “But come sister, We fear Gilda will soon explode if she has to listen to a pair of old mare reminiscing for much longer.”

“Yeah, the good ol’ day when bandits roamed the country, raping and looting everything in sight. When the pony tribes all hated each other as much as they hated changelings, dragons, and gryphons. When your average citizen was a peasant, not allowed to vote, and clinging to an abusive nobility for survival. Back when war crimes were just the normal way to fight wars, and raping the females after taking a town was just the done thing.” I sighed, and looked upwards. “Yeah, those were the days.”

“Please, perhaps that was how it was in the gryphon kingdom, but Equestria was a bit more civilised. It helped when those who held the most power were females,” smirked Luna.

I snorted. “Equestria was just as bad as the Kingdom only a few hundred years before you were banished. Don’t pretend neither of you commanded a town to be sacked, or some crop fields burned. I know the way it used to work.”

“You might be surprised,” Celestia murmured before stepping forward and speaking to the crowd. “Everyone, if you would please calm down, we can begin.”

Her voice cut through the noise like a knife through butter, and it was barely five seconds before the room was completely silent. I saw Trixie sitting near the back, towards the left side of the room.

“Thank you,” she said with a stately tilt of her head. Fuck, it was no wonder most ponies worshipped her. She was waaaaaaaaay more godly than Luna was. Celestia looked across at Luna. “Sister, this is your pet project, would you like to make the announcement?”

Though Luna stepped forward all regal and majestic, it just didn’t have the same effect that Celestia had. Whatever it was, there was simply something missing and that something made Luna look like a foal imitating their parents.

“No doubt thou hath heard of the commotion in the town square barely an hour ago. No doubt thou hath also heard rumors about a gryphon using shadow magic and no doubt thou hath heard the baseless rumors about Us actually being Nightmare Moon planning a coup.” From the way her eyes flicked over to a pair of reporters in the center, it was obvious that last one was a barbed comment hidden behind pleasantries. “We are gathered here to put those rumors to rest and tell the truth of the matter.”

I had to fight the urge to snort. The truth? Please. The truth is that Luna’s the one who destroyed Aviana, that right up until last year Nightmare Moon was still alive inside her head, and that Luna had actually absorbed Nightmare Moon into herself. I really doubted she was about to tell them all those little gems.

“Simply put, Gilda here has been living in Equestria since she was a cub, thou have all been given a copy of her records and as well as free access to all her documentation. Given her troubled youth with the law, she was given the option of going to jail or to join a special programme test run by Commander Shore, who as thou all knows, recently passed away and was posthumously awarded the Equestrian Medal of Valor for his services to the Crown. The success of Gilda was the basis on which Celestia revealed the military programme to help rehabilitate troubled youth into society that has come to be known as the Societal Reintegration Initiative.” Luna paused, her gaze sweeping over all those gathered and I found my eyes falling on Trixie who was rolling her eyes. “The reason Gilda was not revealed then was because she was already acting as a special agent under Celestia and most recently, was deployed near the changeling border. It was there she was critically injured and We were forced to perform the ritual on her in order to save her life. Now, questions.”

One pony stood up, and said, “So, what you’re saying is that you can confirm that Gilda is in fact, some kind of gryphon nightkin?”

“Yes,” said Luna. “Though the transformation was painful and most recently she was rushed into the castle - a fact thou art all well enough - due to complications with her initial transformation.”

“Shutter Bug, from the Canterlot Daily,” a brown pegasus stallion called out and stood up. “Is there any connection between the unspecified operation in the Gryphon Kingdom, and the recent destruction of Aviana?”

“None. Our inquiry was into the changelings and our base of operations was deliberately placed in a location to minimise any collateral damage,” replied Luna.

Another mare stood up. “National Weekly, do you have any comment about the suggestion that Equestria has an interest in assuming control of the Gryphon Kingdom?”

“Currently, we are in discussion with the other nations in the International Species Coalition to manage the Gryphon Kingdom jointly, but only if the gryphons want it. Thus far, for those who have not been following the discussions, we hath agreed to merely watch the situation unfold. Also, as we are herbivores and they are carnivores, we are leaning towards the majority of the management falling to the dragons and minotaurs.”

“Is it appropriate that a convicted gryphon with a documented criminal history be put in a position of legal authority?”

Luna sighed and closed her eyes. “Need We remind thou of thy history? The greatest commander thou had ever had was General Bristleback, who was a known thief, had a criminal record that puts Gilda’s to shame and was single hoofedly responsible for winning the war with the dragons. Also, Gilda is far more stable than he ever was.”

“Is there any particular reason that Gilda, an agent of the government, has been working as a bouncer in a bar in the Eastern Quarter?” Someone else asked. “Is that really appropriate for a representative of the Equestrian government?” It took me a moment to recognise her as the mare that Trixie had thrown out of the bar after cutting in half.

“There is something called a cover story.” Luna smirked. “Though there is always the possibility of there being an operation being run in the vicinity.”

“Will natural gryphon aggression be an issue in creating a more ‘racially integrated’ guard? Do you have an system in place to prevent unnecessary damages?” My head snapped around at that, and I found myself glaring at a green unicorn with yellow hair.

“‘Natural gryphon aggression’?” I repeated, clenching my fists.

“Gilda, would thou like to say something?” asked Luna.

“Yeah, I do,” I stepped forward and unclenched my talons. “What do you actually know about gryphons? What do any of you actually know about gryphons? Have any of you ever actually met one?”

“They’re all in prison,” replied the reporter. “Statistics show gryphons have a higher probability of ending up in jail.”

“In Equestria? Sure. That’s because we’re a minority. You know the exact same statistic applies to ponies living in the Kingdom? Before you go calling gryphons criminals and scumbags, let me ask you if you’ve ever been alone in a society that hates you, with no hope of any kind of a career, no way to earn money outside of bottom rung, minimum wage, shit cleaning, menial labour? Yeah, I took some dodgy jobs, I took plenty of dodgy jobs. And you would too if you were in the same situation.”

In the corner of my eye I noticed Trixie beaming at me proudly, and I had to fight the urge to shuffle awkwardly and look away.

“Any other questions?” asked Luna.

Some other pony asked, while the one I was glaring at had the good grace to avert their eyes and sit down. “Is there any concern that permitting gryphons to join the Guard will somehow involve Equestria in the civil war?”

“There are no such concerns. She is an Equestrian citizen and thus have been given the same opportunities as one,” said Luna.

The pony coughed into her hoof, and said, “I was referring to other potential guards. Gryphons are known for their tribal loyalties, and the conflict is divided along tribal lines at the moment.”

“Gilda?” Luna turned to me. “Dost thou wish to answer this one?”

“That depends from tribe to tribe, and gryphon to gryphon,” I said after a moment. “That’s like asking how a pegasus, earth pony, or a unicorn would respond in a similar situation. Different ponies, different attitude, different reactions. At the moment all the factions are still establishing themselves, their leadership, and their armies. It’s still too early to predict which tribes are going to align with whom, other than vague assumptions that it’ll be Black Eyes with Great Scars, White Beaks with Grey Wings, and all the other tribes picking a side or staying out of it.”

“That doesn’t really answer the question,” the mare pointed out.

“Look, it’s unlikely that accepting gryphons into the guard will involve Equestria in the war, but I can’t promise having different gryphons from different tribal backgrounds under your command won’t bring up some pretty messy issues. A gryphon from one side whose home town got sacked won’t be eager to break bread with a gryphon from the side that did the sacking.”

“So you’re saying there will be tribal issues with accepting gryphons into the guard,” she pressed.

“No I’m not saying that. Like I said, it’s too early to predict anything. Until the war finally turns to battle, and we know who’s siding with who, there’s no way to know if the tribes that are fleeing to Equestria will have problems with others. If I had to bet, I’d say that the Red Ends will stay neutral as long as they can, but eventually side with whoever looks like they have a better chance at winning. The Red Ends are the tribe with the most land on the Equestrian border, so depending on which way they swing, it could be nothing, it could be a small problem, or it could be a pretty big problem. I’m not putting bits where my beak is, either way.”

“Also, We must remind thou that the Coalition are mediating the dispute to the best of our ability,” said Luna.

“Do you have any fears about Gilda letting gryphons off lightly for charges that would otherwise result in jail?” yelled one reporter. “Follow up question, is it not likely she will abuse her power to deliberately jail or otherwise ‘rough up’ innocent ponies?”

“I dunno about hurting innocents, but I think you might look better with a full body cast,” I gave him the biggest smile I could.

“Another question, how do you feel about the image being portrayed at having such a violent gryphon as part of the royal guard? Not only does she have enough convictions to fill out two pages, she has just publicly threatened a civil servant doing his job as reporter. Is this now common behaviour for the guards? Is this acceptable behaviour? Can we expect other innocent ponies to be terrorised in this manner for merely doing their jobs?”

“You weren’t just doing your job,” I rolled my eyes. “That was the most pathetic excuse for thinly hidden racism that I’ve heard since the last time Blueblood opened his mouth. There is no way I’m gonna let anyone, pony, gryphon, minotaur, or goat get away with anything. As for that crap about me ‘terrorizing innocents’, I don’t think that even deserves an answer. If I was a pony you wouldn’t have even asked the damn question.”

“If you were a pony you wouldn’t have had a shit foalhood. If you were a pony you wouldn’t have this hate and anger seen in your convictions. If you were a pony you wouldn’t feel pissed off at us for asking these questions. If you were a pony, there wouldn’t be this whole racist spin on every legitimate question we ask and instead you’d see this as concerned reporters asking why we have an unstable gryphon who is currently seeing a psychiatrist weekly as being an acceptable member of the guard. So I ask again, as a guard with this emotional baggage, will it influence your disposition to ponies and gryphons, and will it result in excessive force being used?”

He was playing innocent. He was baiting me and he knew it, trying to turn me into some front page story along the lines of ‘unstable gryphon proved incompetent’. He wanted to turn me into the villain. I wanted to call him out on it, get back at him, and make him seem like the complete tool he was. But I knew I couldn’t do that. All the other reporters in the room were watching this exchange, ready to write down anything I say. Unless I gave a good argument against him, I’ll have fucked things up again.

Goddesses damn it. What happened to me not saying anything?

“Of course my emotional baggage will affect how I work, that’s the exact reason why I didn’t accept the job the first time it was offered it to me. But here’s the thing: it’s my problems and past that make me the right sentient for this job. I know what the other side of things is like, I know what happens when whoever’s supposed to be protecting citizens fail, I know what it means when you can’t look the guy above you in the eye because he’s too busy standing on your neck. I will not let that happen to anyone.”

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Bluey approach Luna and whisper something in her ear.

Ignoring that I continued. “The guard is bad at its job, bigoted, and just not equipped to deal with the years we have ahead. I am. I’ve been there, done that, and I’m not gonna let the sort of shit that’s hurt me over the years hurt anyone else if I have the chance to stop it. It’s not about what’s appropriate, it’s about what helps.”

The reporter stared at me for a second, before nodding and sitting back down.

“And seriously, whoever the complete fuck-wit that printed that crap about a conspiracy to make me queen of Aviana deserves some kind of comedy award. That was so far off base I don’t even know where to start in pointing out the stupid.”

At the back of the room, Trixie facehoofed.

I took a step back, a smile tugging at the corner of my beak. That was kinda fun, maybe I should do this more often?

“We would like to thank all of thou for coming, but We fear something has come to to Our attention. If required, another meeting will be held, but for now this conference is adjourned,” said Luna.

There was rumblings over annoyance, but all the reporters did what they were told and left without any trouble. I wasn’t sure where I was supposed to go, so I just decided fuck it and waited where I was, keeping an eye out for Trixie. It was a few moments until the room emptied, and I’ll admit I was pretty disappointed that Trixie had left with the crowd and not said goodbye.

“And you said I never surprise you,” said Trixie from behind me.

I was really proud that I managed not to jump. “Totally let you sneak up on me,” I told her as I turned around.

“Suuuuuure.” She kissed me lightly. “You did better than I thought you would.”

Shrugging, I said, “Well, seeing as how I was supposed to just shut up and stand there, I think I managed to mess things up pretty well.”

“You don’t see me disagreeing.” She scuffed her hoof against the floor. “So... um... I suppose Trixie needs to leave now?”

“I... guess so,” I muttered. “Will I see you tomorrow?”

“W-Would you like me to come tomorrow? Is... Is Trixie allowed?”

“Yeah, of course I want you to come, and besides, who gives a fuck if it’s allowed?” I grinned, “When did rules ever stop you, Trix?”

“Mm.... true...” She snuggled up against me. “Maybe we should retire now before someone finds something for you to do...”

I glanced over my shoulder at where Luna and Celestia had been standing before frowning. “...That would be awesome, but I did just give that speech about taking this job seriously... it’d kinda be... wrong to just ditch like that now.”

“Trixie understands.” She ran a hoof over my crown feathers. “Enjoy your job. Trixie will see you later.”

I nodded and gave her a hug, trying to think of something to say but coming up with a blank. Eventually I settled on, “Bye.”

A smirk touched Trixie’s lips. “At least it’s better than ‘sandwich’.”

“Not my fault you’re both delicious.”

“W-What!?” Her face was bright red as her mouth worked uselessly. “Trixie isn’t sure to be insulted or flattered!”

I shrugged. “I was just trying to think of a connection between the two, honestly.”

“Of course,” she said flatly.

We stared at each other awkwardly.

“Well... um...” Trixie scuffed a hoof against the ground.

“See you later, then?” I scratched the back of my head.

“Y-Yeah.” She leaned up and gave me a light peck on the beak. “Later then.”

I want to say something else, but I have no idea what. She stood there for a moment, like she was expecting me to have something to say, but after a moment she awkwardly broke eye contact and walked away. I ended up just watching her walk out, before I sighed as she disappeared down the corridor.

“Thou art certain?”

I nodded for the fifth time in three minutes, not that I was keeping count or anything. “I’m telling you, the reporter for Canterlot Times was a changeling. I know the one riling Gilda up seems far more likely, but trust me, he’s clean. That other one? I’d bet a thousand bits that one was a changeling.”

Luna nodded slowly. “Very well. Eclipse, please bring the pony to us under the veil of an exclusive interview with Gilda. To where we are keeping the others would be ideal.”

“As you command, Your Highness,” he bowed and stepped towards his shadow, “Arresting a reporter? And here I thought today would be a bad day.”

“Shall I go with him?” I asked as he faded out of view.

“No, thou shalt come with Us.” I felt her magic wrap around me, and it took all my willpower to not immediately bolt for the door. Even now, even with her casting a simple teleport spell, I could feel her immense power. It bore down on me, making me feel like an ant. Before I managed to reply, I felt the spell taking hold and a blinding flash of light later, I hit the hard ground.

Groaning, I stumbled to the side and pressed a hoof to my head. “Ooooooh, that hurt.”

“A bit too much magic it seems. Curious.” Luna shrugged and stepped towards the window, looking through it into the cell with the changeling captives. “Regardless, We need thou to help Us determine which utterances are the truth and which are lies.”

“An emotional leech,” I muttered under my breath as I stood next to her. “I can tell you now that the two on the right are useless. I know them and I know they’re not high ranking enough to have any information. The others... I don’t know.” I frowned. “And weren’t there more captives? Three from the warehouse, the ten or so names I gave you an-”

“Some have co-operated and thus We separated them.” Luna’s eyes flicked over to me. “Concentrate, despite what thou think thou knows, there are indications that these are the ones that harbor the most important information.”

A sigh escaped. “Very well. How shall we proceed?”

“What affects a changeling most?” replied Luna.

I opened my mouth, only to close it again. There was one thing that immediately came to mind, but that was... was I really willing to do that to them? It was a punishment even Chrysallis was hesitant to use, but then again, it’s not like they were going to leave them there. Right?

“Solitude,” I whispered. “We’re used to having a hive mind, to always have those thoughts and emotions and being cut off from that is... shocking.”

She cocked an eyebrow at me, but I merely smiled sadly, “I think you did something more than you bargained for. You... stabilised me or something, I don’t know. It was weird, yes, but not traumatic like how it had been described to me. It felt lonely, but...” I tapped my hoof against my cheek, trying to think of the right way to describe it all. “Whole. Yeah, that’s the word I’m looking for. I felt whole.”

“Unsurprising,” she said. “Very well, let us separate them then.” Her horn lit up and all of a sudden the other three changelings vanished and the last one sat bolt up, eyes looking everywhere as panic set in. “Come then, let Us interview Our friend.”

There was a flash of light and I suddenly found myself in the room. Cursing under my breath, I shook out my head trying to clear before I got jumped. It was only once my vision stopped spinning that I realised I no longer had my disguise on and the changeling was staring at me with wide eyes.

“Um... Hi?”

“What are you?” It hissed and backed away a step.

“A changeling,” I replied before wincing at how utterly stupid that sounded. “I’m... different.”

Okay, it was official. I was dumber than Gilda.

“An obvious lie,” it replied, and I felt its mental barrier grow harder. “Who do you hope to fool, pony?”

“Oh, great, now I’m being compared to a pony, as if my life wasn’t bad enough.” I walked over to the window and began banging on it. “Let me out damn it! I was in the middle of something!”

“...I have never been interrogated before, but I believe you’re doing it wrong.”

“Oh shut up, I don’t care about you, I don’t even want to be here.” Already I could feel the confusion replacing the anger from before. “I was just about to buff my carapace damn it!”

“I feel like I should be attacking you in an attempt to escape, but... I’m pretty sure this isn’t actually happening.”

“Because I’m far too hot right?” I playfully stuck my tongue out at it. “Admit it, I’m a total ten.”

The changeling looked away from me, and began touching its cranium. “Strange. I must have been hit on the head harder than I thought...”

“So, prefer male or female?” I asked and he looked at me oddly. “Sorry, must have been around ponies too long, it just feels odd to think of you as an ‘it’. So, prefer male form or female?”

“My sanity has been compromised, I cannot be allowed to return to the hive. That, or this is illusion magic trying to convince me I’m insane in an attempt to reveal information...” He tapped a hoof to his chin.

“Pretty bad illusion magic then, I mean, if anything I should at least look like a normal changeling.” I looked down at him and grinned. “And damn it’s awesome being tall!”

He shook his head, and sat down, leaning against the wall. “My training did not cover this.”

“Eh, admittedly our training was pretty bad. I mean, there’s not really a lot of training opportunities in the Hive especially when everyone knows everyone else due to the Hive mind.” I chuckled and shook my head. “I still remember that time someone thought Hide and Seek would be a good training game.”

He blinked and looked at me, his head tilted to the side. “...”

“What?”

“...Hmm... One of us must have been captured, and then broken under sustained torture, otherwise there’s no way a pony would know this information. It would also explain how I was found...” He frowned. “Rather concerning.”

“Too bad you can’t hear Chrysallis or the hive mind. Good thing I’m in here and that you’re housed with each other, otherwise you’d have cracked already. We all know the stories of what happened to those who displeased her...” I trailed off and looked at him.

He didn’t reply, just continued to look ahead with a neutral expression.

I sighed and shook my head. “Look, I’m not an illusion, alright?”

“To any pony listening in, I am a legitimate business manager, and have committed no crimes against Equestria. Being held here is unlawful, and clearly biased against the changeling race.”

“Of course you are,” I said flatly.

“My business is legitimate, this arrest is unlawful, I demand a lawyer.”

“Good thing this arrest never took place then,” I said.

He didn’t comment.

“Well what would I have to do to convince you I’m a changeling?”

Again, he just stayed silent.

I sighed and shook my head. “Can I get out of here now?”

Silence.

“Come on, this isn’t funny!”

More silence.

“Fuck.” I rubbed my temples. “Looks like I’m stuck here with you.”

He shifted where he sat, but only said, “I request a lawyer.”

“Today’s your lucky day because my disguise is a lawyer which means, I’m your lawyer!” I snapped.

“I am unaffiliated with Queen Chrysalis, or any changeling hive.”

“Impossible, only one hive mind exists and without a hive mind, changelings will eventually go insane,” I replied with a shrug.

“I am unaffiliated with Queen Chrysalis, or any changeling hive,” he repeated.

“Oh dear Luna, save me now.” I cradled my head in my hooves. “Now I know how Eclipse feels.”

“I am unaffiliated with Queen Chrysalis, or an-”

I groaned and slammed my head against the wall. “Please. Shut. Up.”

“I am unaffiliated with Queen Chrysalis, or any changeling hive.”

A scream of frustration escaped as I curled up in a little ball on the ground. “This is a nightmare. This has to be a nightmare. I will wake up and I’ll be in my bed safe and sound.”

The changeling didn’t say anything.

“Why did I wake up today?” I moaned. “Bloody heck, if I knew this was going to happen I wouldn’t have come in today.”

“Is... this supposed to be an interrogation? I’m confused.”

“This is a punishment!” I stroked my tail nervously. “I must have done something wrong and now I’m being punished for it.”

“Uh... I deny everything?”

I rolled my eyes. “You know, you should consider defecting. I mean, look at me, perfectly healthy and let’s admit it, your hivemind connection is blocked so you’re probably taken for dead already. Some come on, join me, I need another changeling buddy to hang out with.”

“... What?” The changeling gave me the most confused look I’ve ever seen on anyone. “I don’t even... what?”

“Like I said, I’m a changeling and I’m free from the hivemind. You should totally join me,” I said as I placed both forehooves under my head.

“...So you’re claiming to be a traitor?”

“Eeeeeeeeh, something like that, sure. Why not? It’s not like you’ll get out with the information anyways and Luna could probably wipe your memory if need be,” I said with a shrug.

“Clearly, you were held in isolation for a long time before defecting.”

“Right. Let me see, we live in the middle of a fucking desert, Chrysallis is an alright ruler but she has issues with punishment, aaaaaaaaand we’re pretty much viewed with suspicion by every race in the world.” I looked at him flatly. “And let’s admit it, the thought of being punished by Chrysallis is the scariest thing ever.”

“I feel like you’re trying to convince me to defect, but... you're either really bad at it, or you're thinking very far outside the box. It’s evident that you’re not sane, and that whatever process has been done to deform you like this has robbed you of all that it means to be a changeling.”

“Hey, I am not deformed! I’m totally hot.” I struck a pose. “See? Hot. But yeah, I do miss the hivemind sometimes, just that constant chatter and knowing someone there understands you perfectly and there’s no need for words. Yeah... it’s lonely, but... not needing to shield my mind so I can have some privacy? That’s a plus.”

He snorted, and looked away. “If you really ever were a changeling, then you’re lost.”

“Or maybe we’ve been stuck so long in our society we can’t think of things differently.”

“Your self delusion astounds me.”

“Your stubbornness makes me want to bash my head in,” I shot back.

“We are changelings, we serve not ourselves, but our hive. You’ve betrayed your race out of a selfish desire for independence and... who know what else you let them do to you in your blind greed.” He waved a hoof at me. “Look at yourself. You let yourself be turned into a freak out of some pathetic desire to live as a pony would. A meaningless selfish existence that fails to matter once you die. You’ve abandoned your hive, and you’ve abandoned all that really matters.”

“And tell me, what is our hive doing? Where are we really going? Spying on other nations, no doubt trying to take down Equestia... If we succeeded, we’ll be the most hated race ever, if we’re not already. We serve the hive, but as far as I can see, our hive is going nowhere except self-destruction and if anyone of us even thinks wrongly, we’re punished.”

“Delude yourself with petty justification for your treason all you want, but don’t fool yourself into thinking I’ll join you in your empty cause.”

“Fine,” I spat as I stood up. “Luna, get me out of here damn it or I’l-”

I blinked as a shivering changeling stepped out of the shadowy corner of the room, collapsing in a heap on the ground and a second later, Eclipse appeared, spitting blood onto the ground as he did so.

“E-Eclipse?” I licked my dry lips and trotted towards him. “Are we getting out of here?”

He nodded and wiped the blood from his lip. Trotting over, he put his hoof on my forehead, and before I could react we both started sinking through the floor into our shadows. As the silence filled my mind, all I could think of were his words. Had... Had I really changed so much? Forgotten about what it meant to be a changeling? I did this because I had tasted freedom, I had tasted those emotions and now...

I stumbled as I came out of a shadow to the side, and shivering uncontrollably.

“Do I have all my teeth?” Eclipse asked, absently feeling his mouth with his tongue. “She hit me in the face rather hard.”

“Y-Yeah,” I replied not even bothering to look at him.

“Are you okay?” He frowned at me. “I might be a bit overtaxed, and that shadow walk was a little rougher than usual, I think.”

“I’m fine.” I grinned up at him. “So what are we doing now?”

“Picking the weakest, most expendable changeling, isolating it until its insane, and then returning it to the others.” He grabbed a handkerchief and started to clean his face. “Luna’s orders were to make them talk, after all, and I thought fear would be an effective motivator before we even start to approach the more clued in ones.”

“Alright.” I took a deep breath and suppressed my emotions, pushing them down, but even then I could hear those stupid words bouncing around in my head and I closed my eyes. “Just give me a minute.”

“Whenever you’re ready.” He dropped the handkerchief into a laundry basket, and rolled his neck and shoulders. “Interesting that the changelings weren’t trying to smear Gilda. I honestly wonder what the one disguised as a reporter was trying to do.”

“Who knows.” I took a couple deep breaths in an attempt to keep my emotions down.

“Bluey? Are you okay?” he asked, sounding concerned.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine, just... just give me a minute.”

“What’s wrong?” he frowned, stepping closer. “What happened in that room?”

I took a step back. “We just talked, that’s all.”

“A simple talk can destroy nations and start wars.” He stared straight into my eyes. “What’s wrong?”

I looked away and stepped back again. “I said I’m fine.”

“Bluey, as your friend I have to remind you that in your current circumstance, keeping secrets is a poor idea, especially keeping them so poorly. Your life can be taken from you on a mere suspicion. Please, I’m on your side.”

“Are you? Are you really?” I dropped my disguise and he took an instinctively step back. “I thought as much.”

“Bluey, I reacted to the fire, not your appearance. I spent a week in an apartment with you when you weren’t able to hide yourself. If I was still worried about that, I wouldn’t be able to hide it.”

“Yeah, sure,” I muttered under my breath as I turned away.

“Mares,” he cursed and rolled his eyes.

With a snarl, I kicked the door open before slamming it behind me and stalking off. I did not need to deal with him right now. I did not need to need this or him or any of this fucking shit. I screamed in frustration and blasted the wall before me with a ball of fire.

“I’m not a fucking mare damn it!” I yelled into the empty corridor. “I’m a changeling! A Celestia damned changeling!” I pounded the stone walls, tears dripping down my cheek. “I’m a fucking changeling...”

“Bluey, plea-”

“That’s not my name!” I snarled as I spun around, a hoof aimed at his face.

He tilted his head to the side in consent. “True enough, but I’m not sure why you’re taking issue with that just now... if you prefer I can call you by your serial number until you’re done with... whatever emotional crisis you’re experiencing.”

“Yes! I- I mean, I don’t...” I squeezed my eye shut, trying my hardest to get my emotions under control, but they kept worming out of my grasp and soon I found the tears starting up again. “I don’t know, damn it...”

“I see...” Eclipse hesitated for a moment, before stepping closer and awkwardly putting his hoof on my shoulder. “Identity issues?” he guessed.

All I could was simply nod my head, even as I wrapped both forehooves around his neck.

It took a moment, but eventually he hugged me back. “I can empathize.”

“I’m a freak! Look at me, I-I... have you seen a changeling that looks like me? I’m a fucking freak!”

“I know the feeling.” He replied, and shifted my hooves so they were holding him more comfortably.

I sniffed and looked at him with bleary eyes. “S-Sure. Let’s just forget this ever happened, alright?” I wiped my eyes and stood up, pushing my emotions down and for once, they actually stayed down. “Let’s just get going.”

“I would rather not,” he frowned at me, and looked into my eyes. “You’re obviously distressed, and I’d like to help you as best I can.”

I looked away. “Look, we’ve got a job to do so we might as well do it.”

“Please.” he rolled his eyes. “At the very least it’s going to take several days to send one of them insane through isolation. We’re not pressed for time. If there’s a problem, I’d like to resolve it before it becomes more serious.”

I rubbed my eyes. “Can we not do that then? The isolation thing it’s... it’s wrong. It’s why I wanted to get away from Chrysallis to begin with.”

“Well, unless you can think of another way of making them talk, it seems like the best option to me.”

“Please don’t,” I whispered. “Ponies are better than that.”

Eclipse shifted where he sat. “No, they’re not. Ponies are no greater or lesser than any other sentient race, they’re just more fortunately positioned.”

“That’s a harsh stance to take,” I said slowly. “But... I won’t let you.”

“Equestria as it is today was founded on the destruction of the nightkin as a species.” He shrugged helplessly. “Our paradise simply wouldn’t exist if we weren’t willing to do whatever was necessary to preserve it. Someone has to get their hooves dirty, why not me?”

I stared at him in disgust before I turned away, muttering under my breath, “And to think I actually thought you were kinda hot.”

“You can’t judge me,” he said plainly. “I know you’ve bloodied you hooves just as much, if not more than I have.”

“I can and I just did,” I hissed. “I’ve got blood on my hooves, but that is a limit right there. I bet even Gilda would agree with me.”

He tilted his head. “It’s questionable, yes, but unless you can come up with an alternative, it’s our best option.”

“Doesn’t mean it’s the right option.”

“My job is to keep the country safe, Chrysalis is planning to harm Equestria. I need to know what her plan is so I can prevent it, if I don’t thousands could die. The wrong thing would be to not pursue every option to prevent that from happening.”

My limbs shook as I just stared at him. After a moment of silence I said, “I’m leaving.”

“...Please don’t,” he answered. “I know that they’re sentients. I know that their pain is just as real as ours. Believe me when I say this horrifies me just as much as it does you. I’ve been keeping Luna’s secrets for only a year, but it feels like a lifetime.”

“I don’t care,” I hissed, “this is wrong and it needs to stop.”

“It hasn’t even started yet,” he replied.

“I. Don’t. Care.” I was suddenly in his face, my horn inches from his throat. “It stops.”

“Please. Provide an alternative.” I didn’t even need to focus on him to taste that bitter uncertainty and pain. That smooth yet thick liquor of self loathing. It was all there in one concoction vile enough to make me want to puke. His voice didn’t even quaver once. “I really don’t want this to happen, but I can’t see a way around it.”

“I do this the right way. The correct way.” I took a deep breath and licked my lips. “I’ll convince them to join us. I’ll act the part of a changeling. I’ll do whatever it takes, but not that.”

“How long will it take? Do you really think it could work?”

“I don’t care how long it takes.” I stomped my hoof, causing green flames to spark out in all directions. “They will join us.”

They must join us. There must be another changeling out here like me... that thought like me. There had to be. I couldn’t... I couldn’t be the only one.

“I really wish I believed you.”

“Since when have I lied to you?” I asked with a smirk.

He sighed, and looked away. “Luna will only accept this method for so long. Eventually, we’ll have no choice but to go through with the plan. You have until then to convince them.”

“Yeah...” I sighed and rubbed my temples. And the worst part was, there wasn’t a single changeling out there that I knew of who thought anywhere near the same way I did. And those that did had probably been found out already. It didn’t help that the only changeling I really had contact with was the old grumpy handler that... I...

Oh. Fuck.

A grin appeared as I grabbed his hoof. “Good thing I already have a changeling in mind then. Come on, we don’t have much time to waste!”

“Where are we going?” he asked with an eyebrow raised. “And with such enthusiasm.”

“I know who will join us!” I yelled as my old disguise flared up around me. “I just hope he hasn’t been found out yet. I need you to teleport us to where Vinyl works. You know the place right? Mixers?”

“I can’t shadow walk across half the city.” He frowned. “It would kill me. Why does a visit with your old friend take such priority?”

“My handler works there and he’s not happy with Chrysallis either. If we can get him...” I trailed off and grinned at him as we raced up the stairs. “He’s got information, more than enough information and all we have to do is convince him to join us. Easy!”

“Easy?” he repeated dubiously. “That sounds far too convenient.”

“It’s about fucking time we caught a break!” Instead of running all the way to the main entrance, I smashed the nearest window and leapt out. No doubt the place would be swarming with guards within seconds, but fuck that, we were on a roll.

“You need to calm down!” Eclipse shouted as he flew after me. “He could already be dead! If they know you’ve defected, and he’s your handler, Chrysalis would have eliminated him immediately.”

“He’s not an idiot, he’ll be fine.” It took a split second to get my bearing and as soon as I had, I zoomed off. “Damn it, I need somewhere to go back to my old unicorn disguise. Also, you need to hide your wings, this is an undercover mission.”

“We can stop by my old apartment,” he called ahead. “The large building wi-”

“Just lead the fucking way!”

He pulled ahead of me, and lead the way to the main clubbing district. Before we started to pass over it, he banked left and landed on the roof of a mid sized building. We entered through the roof top entrance, and he said over his shoulder, “I’m on the sixth floor, apartment twelve.”

“Just move it,” I said as I began shoving him down the stairs. “Seriously, move it.”

He rolled his eyes, and wrapped a wing around my shoulder before pushing me though his shadow.

We stumbled out together, falling to the floor in a big heap in the living room of some generic Canterlot apartment. Judging from the dark and the smell of dust, it had been a while since he visited here. At least it was clean.

“Change your appearance, I have some clothes in my room,” he said as he stood up and trotted down the hall.

I immediately shifted into my old ‘Bluey-unicorn’ disguise and looked around the room. It was definitely clean, looked fairly inexpensive and everything actually looked as though it was well maintained. Despite the dust on everything. And there was a bookshelf in the corner, but that wasn’t really surprising. Considering how much he read, I immediately trotted over and began browsing through the titles.

Boring, boring, don’t understand, some old Equine Title thingie, boring, stupid, silly, boring, boring, bo-

Wait, Daring Doo!?

A grin spread across my face. Oh, all the mocking I could get out of this. All the jokes.

A couple of moments later, Eclipse came out of his room, wearing a black jacket with glow sticks poking out of the pocket, and a sideways cap that covered his ears.

I stared at him silently for a couple seconds before bursting out laughing so hard, I collapsed onto the ground with my hooves in the air. Oh dear Celestia, my sides were going to crack, they were going to split right open.

“From your reaction, I assume the disguise is effective.” He stared at me with a frown.

“You look ridiculous!” I clutched my stomach as I giggled uncontrollably, tears leaking down my cheek.

“To someone who doesn’t know me, I look like an earth pony teen out to enjoy a night of soft drugs, alcohol, and terrible music,” he said flatly.

“You look like an old gramps who’s out of touch with culture trying to look ‘hip’ and failing. Miserably.”

“Then what do you suggest?” He rolled his eyes. “It doesn’t even matter. As long as no one recognises me as a nightkin, it should do fine.”

“That disguise screams ‘I’m a guard, don’t talk to me!’” I sighed and rubbed my temples. “Mind if I make some adjustments and see what other clothes you have?”

“Fine.” He turned around and walked back into his room. “What do you suggest then?”

“Well, show me your clothes, also, mine.” I grabbed the glowsticks and threaded them together into a necklace that I threw around my neck.

He threw open a closet and took a step back. “A mare hasn’t needed to dress me since I was living with my mother and going to school most days.”

“I shudder in fear at the crimes you’ve committed without help.” I ran a critical eye over the wardrobe selection before turning back to him. “Seriously? You dress like a fifty year old.”

“I don’t ever wear any of this. I’m either in armour, uniform, or undressed.”

“I don’t care.” Another sigh escaped as I ran a hoof through my mane. Reaching out, I grabbed the oldest jacket I could find and immediately tore off the sleeves.

“Yes. You may deface the jackets I paid for. Thank you for asking.”

“Get Luna to pay you back,” I said as I began working on the bottom, making it look as jagged and worn as possible. “Okay, chuck this on.” I pulled out a dark blue shirt, sliced off the sleeves as well before slicing off the bottom half to make it shorter before slicing the front open. “And this is for me. Not really that great, but eh, it’ll work.”

I stared at it for a second longer before tossing it in the bin. “Actually, I refuse to be caught wearing that. I’m fine as is.”

He stared at the bin for a moment before he looked at me. “You couldn’t have decided that before you threw out my clothes?”

“Nope.” I cocked an eyebrow at him. “Come on, put that on.”

He sighed and put on the clothes I chose for him. “I think you might suffer from a case of clinical depression.”

I stepped back and sighed, rubbing my eyes. “Okay, it’s better than before, but it’s still bad. It’ll pass though, we don’t have time to waste. Come on!”

“Your changes in mood are so sudden and unexpected, you're constantly using a happy veneer of enthusiasm to hide your real feelings, and well... I’m concerned for you.”

I rolled my eyes. “Whatever, we need to do this now and this is important. Come on already!” I began shoving him towards the door.

“I get the impression that when I bring it up later, you’re going to tell me ‘later’ then too.”

“Move. Now,” I growled.

“You’re avoiding the discussion,” he said as he opened the door to his apartment and held it for me as we stepped out.

“And my hoof is currently avoiding your face, but it may not stay that way for much longer if you keep this up.”

“If it means helping you, I consider a broken nose to be worth it.”

I muttered curses under my breath as we began walking down the steps. “Whatever.”

“I’ll leave it alone for now, but it is a serious concern, and you do need to deal with it.”

“What. Ever.” I shoved past him and began making my way down the stairs.

“You haven’t said that I’m wrong.” He noted idly as we stepped out onto the street.

I simply growled at him and glanced around, trying to figure out exactly where I was. It took a while before I realised we were near the city center, definitely not cheap considering how close the markets were. Did being a guard pay that well or did his parents chip in? Regardless, it was a stupid place to have an apartment and he was stupid to get it here.

I immediately turned and began trotting up the street before quickly turning down one of the alleyways. Stepping past the rubbish bins and cracked road, I began moving down the various twists and turns, my hoofbeats echoing back towards me as I raced along at breakneck speeds. I knew this place, these roads, these paths. I had lived here for so long, moving along and keeping myself hidden before Vinyl found me and took me in. Thinking back on it, it was so weird, so surreal, so confusing. By all accounts she should have immediately hated me, but she hadn’t.

I shook my head, this was not time for reminiscing, I had a goal before me and I had needed to focus. Skidding to a stop, I looked around, getting my bearings before I immediately shot down another path and soon was back on the mainstreet. I took a deep breath to calm myself before turning the corner and swearing under my breath. There was Mixers and there was a line that went right down the street and out of sight. Since when had this place gotten so damn popular?

“Okay, new plan, we go through the back,” I said as I slipped back into the alley and went down the opposite path.

“Any reason why?” he asked, but followed me.

“Did you see that line?” Okay, he was blind and stupid. “We can slip in the back and go through the backstage. Just, don’t say anything and follow my lead, alright?”

“Understood.”

“Good.” I walked up to the door and knelt down. Reaching up, I plucked out my hairpin out, letting my mane fall down and frame my face. I breathed out and tried to remember how this lockpicking business worked.

“Paper clips are better,” Eclipse said after a moment, before offering me one. “And you’ll need something to turn the lock.”

I just glared at him before going back to my work. Actually, fuck this. Stepping back, I spun around and bucked the door. Once, twice, three times and the door splintered, the locking completely breaking as it swung open. From the otherside, ponies stared at me in shock as I simply stepped through, ignoring the splinters on the ground.

“We’re with the guard, this is an undercover mission,” I said. “Eclipse if you please.”

“Subtle,” he muttered as he stepped forward. With one hoof he pushed up his clothes, and spread a black wing before hiding it again. “Go about your business.”

There was some grumbling, some swearing and a lot of dirty looks, but they did as I asked.

“This way.” I immediately made my way down the back of the stage and down the side. Instead of going onto the dance floor, I kept us to the background, moving along the small alleyway they had between the stage, cellar and bar. With all this emotion echoing around, there was no need for me to jam anything. “Okay, go up and ask for Grave Chill and bring him down here.”

“Grave Chill?” he repeated.

“The bartender. Just say you’re a new worker and do the whole emotional suppressing thing of yours, it makes you feel like a changeling.”

“Really?” He glanced at me, before shrugging and walking away.

I sighed and tapped my hoof. This had to work. There was no way this wouldn’t work. Right? Right. Gotta keep positive, gotta keep my hopes up. I was not the only one, there were others out there like me, that thought like me. I was not unique. I didn’t want to be unique. I just wanted to be... be...

I slapped myself. Focus, keep the angst down and the emotions down. This was neither the time or place.

“-ant from me?”

My head snapped back and I felt my heart rate quicken. This was it, this was the moment of truth.

They finally turned the corner and Grave Chill stared at me in shock. After a moment, he stepped forward slowly and looked me up and down. “You who I think you are?”

“Eclipse, can you make sure no one comes down here?” I asked as I dropped my disguise. “It’s been awhile, hasn’t it?”

He glanced over his shoulder at Eclipse’s retreating form before looking back at me. “I thought you were dead.”

“That was the point.” I smiled at him sadly. “I had to get out.”

“You know you’ve got a name now.” His voice was neutral.

“I know, it’s Blue Moon, Bluey for short,” I said with a shrug. “But that’s neither here nor th-”

“No, I mean we gave you a name. After we thought you’d gone.”

“Does it look like I care?”

“Yes.”

“Well I don’t. So you gonna tell me or will I continue ignoring you?”

“Melancholy. We all thought you’d killed yourself when you suddenly dropped out like that, and your thoughts were always so depressing. After you messed up with the Bearer of Loyalty and that gryphon, most of us thought you chose death over what Chrysalis would have done to you.”

“Better name than ‘Bluey’ that’s for certain. And as tempting as that is, I found a third way out.” I gestured at my new body and cocked an eyebrow at him. “I find your lack of response concerning.”

He shrugged. “I’m just waiting for you to explain it.”

“Like I said, I found a way out. With strings attached of course, but I’m here to see if you’d like to join me. Free from the hive mind, free from Chrysallis.”

He didn’t react. “You’re really disconnected?”

“Can you hear my thoughts?”

His lip twitched. “How?”

“Come with me and I’ll show you.”

“You’re avoiding the question.”

“It’s part of the strings.”

“Then no.”

“Wh-what?” I stared at him, mouth working useless.

“I’m not willing to let...” he waved a hoof at me. “That be done to me, if you can’t even tell me what that is.”

I sighed, forcing my tears back. “It’s just a ritual, nothing serious.”

“Serious enough that you’re not allowed to talk about it, which means that you’re taking orders from someone, which judging by your pony friend, that someone is Celestia, which would explain how so many of us were captured recently.”

I winced and shrunk back. “So... no...?”

“You betrayed us.”

“There were strings attached,” I said, but even to my ears it was beyond weak.

“We both have had our problems with Chrysalis, Mel, but to turn changelings over to them like that?” He shook his head. “What have you done?”

I hissed at him. “My name is not Mel and if you call me that, I will rip out your throat. And if we do nothing, Chrysallis will make us the most hated race in the world.”

“As if that’s anything new,” he snorted. “Tell me, how much do your new pony friends trust you?”

“Those that know I’m a changeling? All of them. Every single last one of them trusts me completely and utterly.” I jerked my head over to Eclipse who was watching the steps. “He trusts me enough to talk to a changeling - my handler might I add - out of earshot with his back to us and know I won’t trade secrets to you.”

Chill glanced at Eclipse, then back at me. “And now you’ve brought a pony here, and revealed who I am to them. You do realise the position you’ve forced me into by doing this? My cover is ruined, and if I’m captured than every changeling I handle is at risk. Damn it, I have responsibilities! Changelings other than you who need me, and if I go with you then I’ll have to sell out all of them as well!”

“I didn’t sell you out,” I said softly.

He pointed a hoof at Eclipse. “Then what’s that?”

“My partner,” I replied flatly. And probably the only sentient that actually cared about me.

“I understand the temptation, having your mind to yourself, but... to give into it? Does loyalty mean anything to you? We’re all we’ve got, and you turned your back on that.”

“But we can have more than that! Don’t you see?” I gestured at Eclipse. “We don’t have to be hated or mistrusted or spat on. We can be the good guys for once.”

“It’s a pretty dream, but look at yourself! Is becoming what you are really an option for the entire hive? Would it even be possible for so many of us? Our hive mind is part of who we are as a species. Giving that up is like...” He shook his head.

I stared at him, tears prickling the edges of my eyes.

“If that’s your concern, then I’ll make my own hive mind,” I said.

He blinked. “What?

I stared at him straight in the eyes. “I’ll make my own hive mind.”

“How? I thought being alone was the whole point of this.”

“Being away from Chrysallis was the whole point of this. Bringing changelings back to being a race that should be looked up to is the whole point of this.” I closed my eyes, remember the bits and pieces I saw of Trixie and GIlda’s adventure. The snippets of information I had gleaned from that mad hive mind that grew out of the chemicals. “If it could be done once, it can be done again.”

He seemed to follow my line of thought. “Those changeling were insane. Mindlessly consuming and growing, constantly hungry and barely sentient-”

“Do you trust me?”

“...I did.”

“Do you still trust me.” I held out a hoof.

He gave it a wary look. “I’m not sure I do. You’re more emotional than your pony friend.”

“I’ve always been emotional.”

“But I knew you were sane.”

“I’m still sane.”

He frowned at that, glancing between my face and my hoof before sighing and pressing his hoof against it.

“Thanks.” I felt the pressure ease off my chest. “For more than you could possibly know.”

He didn’t respond, just lowed his hoof and took a step back. “What’s your plan?”

“We go the castle. I need to talk to Luna about something.”

He didn’t answer or respond, just watched me silently.

“What?”

“I’m just wondering if this is really a good idea, and what will happen to me if she doesn’t agree to whatever you’re planning.”

“Just trust me,” I pleaded.

“I trust that you mean well...”

“Come on,” I said. “I know this will work.”

“My choices at this point, are go with you and see what happens, try and kill you and probably fail, or let you go and get executed by Chrysalis for not trying to stop you. Not exactly a lot of options for me.”

“Assuming Chrysalis finds out,” I said.

“Unless you have a way of erasing this from my memories, she will find out one way or another.”

“And you wonder why I decided to get out while I could,” I muttered under my breath.

“Someone’s coming,” Eclipse called over his shoulder.

I swore under my breath and went back to my unicorn disguise. “Come on, now or never, this is your final chance. Come with me, please.”

“...” He shifted where he stood before nodding. “Alright. Let’s get out of here.”

“Alright!” I grinned at him and turned to Eclipse, “We’re good to go, time to get back to Luna an-”

A sick crunch echoed through the room and something wet splattered itself all over my side. There was a brief spark of pain and sadness that sent me to my knees and by the time I got it under control, I felt a hoof connect with my side, sending me sprawling onto the ground. Rolling with the momentum, I came onto my hooves only to freeze in shock. There was SC0032 on the ground, a dagger sticking out of his neck and a changeling I did not recognise standing over his dead body.

No... This... This couldn’t be happening. Not when I was so close, not when I finally got a changeling on my side. This, this was some cruel joke, it had to be! He was still alive, he had to be alive. There had to be something, anything, a shred of emotion, a hint of thought, something that’d tell me otherwise, but all I got was a silence. An unnatural, disgusting silence that echoed in my brain.

“Let your hollow mind drive you further down the path of insanity, and to the death of your hollow cause.”

Then just like that, green flames erupted and it was gone.

“No... No!” I screamed letting all that anger and sorrow and confusion pour out. “No! It won’t end like this, I won’t let it end like this! Damn it Grave Chill, wake up!” My hoof slammed into his chest. “Wake up. No dying on me, no going to sleep. You will wake up and y-yo-you-”

Sobs wracked my body as I bent over his dead body, hot tears stinging my cheeks and splashing onto his chest. I was so close, so fucking close. Just one changeling, just one bloody fucking changeling and...

“Bluey?” Eclipse said.

Was I the only one. The only changeling that wanted change, that wanted to be accepted and not to be hated? I just... I just wanted to do the right thing. The selfish thing maybe, but good could come from this. Good had to come from this.

“We need to go.”

In the ichor forming under my hooves I saw my reflection and all I saw was a monster. A creature with long limbs and four wings and disgusting eyes. I was hideous. A real reflection of what I was like on the inside. What had I done? Why had I done this? I wasn’t trying to help, I was selfish. I gave in to temptation and now I looked like what I was on the inside. I didn’t... I didn’t...

The blade shook in my magic as I ripped it free. It trembled before me, mocking me, singing to me.

What was the point of it anymore. I’d be hated. I’d never be able to walk freely on the streets as I was. I’d never be loved like this. Not by a pony, not by a gryphon, not even by another changeling. I was a freak. A monster. Even Celestia hated me. Even Luna...

“Bluey!” Eclipse grabbed my shoulder and shook me. “We need to go, now!”

I just stared at him mutely, his words entering my brain, but unable to be understood. To be processed. Didn’t he get it? There was no point anymore, there was no reason.

“Damn it,” he hissed and grabbed the dagger from my magic, hiding it under his coat. “Bluey! There could be more changelings, and they’re going to want you dead! We need to go, now!”

“Why does it matter?” I asked him. “It’s lost anyways.”

“What’s lost?” he asked, before shaking his head. “Just put your disguise on, and let’s get out of here!”

“Don’t you get it? It’s lost. There’s no point anymore.”

He growled in frustration. “There’s more reason to live than the things that define you.”

I shook my head and just collapsed onto the ground. “I’m done. Just... just go.”

“Well I’m not done.” He put his foreleg under me and pushed me up onto his shoulders so he was carrying most of my weight. “You’re the only part of my day I look forward to, and I’m not letting you die here.” He grunted, struggling with my size. “You’re not the only one invested in your well being, Bluey.”

“You don’t get it, I’m a monster. No one thinks like me, no one will ever think like me. I’m a selfish bitch who deserves to die.”

He rolled his eyes. “Oh, goddesses, self destruction. Of course no one thinks like you, because you’re an individual with your own unique experiences and life view. And a bitch? Please. You cared enough for your friends Vinyl and Octavia that you were willing to risk your life for their sake. Luna was just as likely to destroy you as she was to free you.”

“Maybe she should have...”

“Well she didn’t. You’re a friend, the only real friend I have, and I’m not letting you die out of some foolish delusions and pointless self recrimination.”

I sighed and leaned my head on his shoulder. “You don’t get it, I betrayed my race. I betrayed everything changelings stand for just for some selfish want. They hate me, they all hate me.”

“That one didn’t, and if he didn’t others won’t either. He wouldn’t have been killed if Chrysalis didn’t perceive you as a threat.”

“But-”

“But nothing!” He snapped. “If you die now it will all be for naught, and your friend will have just lost lost his life for no reason at all. They call you a traitor, but what do you owe them? You’ve lived your entire life in service to a hive that would kill you the moment it perceived you as no longer a part of them. It would be fair if you simply walked away, but it’s remarkable that you actually want nothing more than to risk your life to save them from their tyrant. If that makes you a selfish bitch, then I don’t know what that makes the rest of us.”

But that was just a lie. A stupid lie that I made up to justify myself. To make myself seem better than I was. That wasn’t the truth, that was never the truth. I just wanted to run away, to escape. To...

“If you were to give up now, it would be selfish. Maybe your original intent wasn’t pure, but now you have a chance to help them. Don’t you get it Bluey? If you give in now, I will return to the palace and systematically break those changelings for information. With luck, I’ll find a way to foil Chrysalis’ plans, but at the end of the day nothing will have changed. You’re the first changeling in recorded history to live independently of your hive, and the first changeling in a long time to have safely disconnected from a queen. You can change things, and you can help an entire species escape from a rut it’s been in for thousands of years. Give up now, and that would be true self service.”

I stared at him in shock, my mouth working uselessly.

“Now grow up, put your disguise back on, and come with me.”

I nodded mutely and threw on my nightkin disguise. Now that his words had sunk in though, I found myself agreeing with him. I could do something now, something important and if I gave up, that’d be true worthlessness. I was hated, I was feared, I was a monster, but so were so many before me. So were the nightkin. Even if I were to die, I could die a martyr. Even in death, I could serve a purpose. Dying here, in this cellar, in the middle of nowhere? That was not worth it.

He led me back the way we came, out to the street, constantly keeping an eye out for changelings. “Can you fly?”

“Y-Yeah.” I took a deep breath and hugged him. “And thank you.”

He didn’t react at first, but after a moment he hesitantly put a hoof around my shoulder and nodded, before taking it off and stepping away from me. “Think nothing of it. You’re not the only one who would be hurt by your death.”

“Regardless, thank you.”

He didn’t answer, just continued down the path and said, “Come on.”

I nodded and spread my wings. “Can I ask a favor?”

“There’s no harm in asking.”

“Can you try and move Octy and Vinyl to the Castle? WIth what happened I don’t feel comfortable with them out in public...”

“I’ll mention it to Luna, and see what can be done.”

“Thank you.” I leaned forward and pecked on him the cheek. “For everything.”

He blinked in surprise and reached to touch his face before stopping himself and putting his hoof back to the ground. “Just try to remember that even without the hive, you’re not alone.”

“I’m starting to realise that now.” I leapt into the air. “So? You coming?”

He nodded and jumped up after me. “We should hurry.”

“Back to the castle?”

He nodded, and flew ahead of me.

It was weird to think about not being alone. That despite not having a hive mind, not having that intimate connection those around me, I was still wanted. Needed even. I was alive, that changeling hadn’t killed me and that was their greatest mistake. Luna had given me something special, something important and as long as I had this, I was going to use it to take Chrysalis down. Changelings didn’t deserve to be hated, we deserved to be loved and accepted and I was going to make that happen. Brand me a traitor, brand me a monster, it mattered not what I was called. Whether it was a some generic barcode name, Melancholy or even Blue Moon, I knew who I was and what I was.

Change is coming and I was going to be at the forefront of it all.

“Hey, Eclipse?” He glanced over his shoulder at me curious. “I think I’ll be alright now.”

Comments

[ForSpite]

Trixie and Gilda can be an awfully cute couple. I think I smirked hard enough to make my cheeks ache through their getting ready conversation.

I snorted and took another bite of my burger. “And that’s why any country run by you would burn down in seconds. Economic collapse? Rebellion? Another country invading? Fuck off, I’m napping.”
“Sure you are,”

This is a weird reply, since Gilda was talking about what she thought Rainbow would say and then Rainbow acted like Gilda was claiming she(Gilda) was napping.

"“Well you sleep in this. No?"

Probably should be "Well, you sleep in this, no?"