More Like Deadheart
Fire poorly disguised as sunlight blazed between beige curtains, igniting my eyes in a flurry of pain and rousing me from a slumber I didn't realize I’d fallen into. With a raspy grown, I weakly rolled away and moved a pillow to block out the intruding day. Slowly, my mind attained a more coherent state, and I peeked out from under my pillow shield.
Medical equipment sat to the right of the bed, and although I couldn't identify most of it, I did recognize an IV bag. I struggled to put the pieces together through the pounding fog encasing my brain like an ever-constricting snake, but I couldn't string a thought along for long enough. My eyes lazily traced the cord attached to the bottom of the bag and followed it down to my right foreleg, where an IV stuck out. Oh no.
I scrambled to a sitting position and nervously scanned the hospital room. It looked like nearly any other hospital room: neutral colors and bland decorations abound, and I would have mistaken it for a hotel room if it weren't for the invasive needle in my leg. The bed under me was about twice the height of the pony beds I was used to, presumably to make it easier for the medical staff.
A plaster cast encased my broken leg and immobilized the joints above and below. While it covered the fetlock extensively, it did leave a reasonable amount of hoof exposed, to distance the calf from the ground as much as possible. A casual sniff and a distinct lack of blood and grime determined someone had washed me at some point.
The equipment mocked me, and I glared daggers at it despite my wonderment at the surprisingly advanced machines. From what I had seen of Equestria so far, I almost expected medical technology to be little more than leeches and trepanning tools, but the devices almost looked modern. The part of me that wasn't panicking about being in a hospital was already puzzling over how the machines worked and how I could take them apart. I’d find out later. I needed to get out of there!
The IV in my leg needed to go—my first instinct was to just grab the tube in my teeth and rip it out, but that wasn't something you should really do with things hooked up to your veins. I liked my blood the best when it stayed on the inside. I scooted out of bed and a sudden bout of vertigo nearly made me stumble into the IV stand, but was alright, since I'd wanted to go that direction anyway.
"At least it's a better plan than just yanking the needle out of my leg," I mumbled as I stared at the tube leading up to the IV bag. A few yanks later, I was free and wondering what to do with the length of tube in my mouth. I couldn't just leave it dangle behind me—I'd probably step on it. Eh, just add it to the list of things I could have thought through more thoroughly. Tying knots with hooves is difficult, but I managed a crude one that didn't pull on the needle too much.
That done, it was time for me to return to my grand escape, and with a smile on my face, I made my way to the door. A private bathroom passed on my right, and I reflexively licked my lips at the thought of water. After gorging myself on the delicious, frigid water, I quietly opened the door to resume my escape.
"And just where do you think you're going?" An alabaster earth pony with a pastel-pink mane tied in a bun stood before me. Two fierce but matronly eyes glared out from under her mane and nurse's cap, demanding that I get back in bed.
"Helloooooooo, nurse!" Grinning, I broke eye contact and added, "Redheart."
Unperturbed, she flicked her head towards the bed and ordered me back into it with a frustrated grunt. She strolled into the room after me, tsking at the IV bag dripping onto the ground.
"Your friends warned me about you," she said while replacing everything I'd messed up. "You know I'm just going to have to redo all of that, right?"
"What for? I don't plan on sticking around long."
"Phooey to your plans. You're dehydrated, malnourished, sleep-deprived, and hungover, not to mention the more obvious injuries. Whether you have a problem with hospitals or not, you're remaining in that bed until you're cleared." If I didn't know better, I would have assumed she purposely inserted the new IV that hard. She locked eyes with me and practically growled. "Don't remove it again." Dear Princess Celestia, Nurse Redheart is absolutely terrifying. Seriously, I would have rather been set up with a pony Kevorkian.
I dumbly blinked at her and struggled to find some way to barter for an escape. I couldn't stay there. I had to leave. I wouldn't get stuck again.
She rolled her eyes as she performed a check up. "Save it, I've been a nurse long enough to know when a pony's going to try anything to get out earlier than possible. Say 'ah,' please." Pony tongue depressors are freakishly huge compared to human ones and could probably be used to paddle a boat.
"When did I get here?" If I couldn't leave, I might as well learn who to blame.
"This morning. You collapsed when the Royal Guard was asking questions about the attack last night." I hazily recalled that much at least. They drank a lot of coffee, and one of them had a flask he poured into his mug whenever he thought he wasn't being watched. "Your friends weren't in the best condition either, but it was nowhere as serious as yours. Miss Scratch had a small concussion, Mr. Order had a cracked rib and a sprained ankle, and both of them had a medley of scrapes and bruises."
"I'm glad I'm worst off then." Small victories are still a victory.
"You're lucky is what you are. I saw the aftermath—the market is half-wrecked from your crash. I heard rumors of your cart being powered with magic, but I didn't believe anything on land could move as fast as you had to be going."
"Can't let the pegasi and unicorns have all the fun." My chuckles pounded another nail into my skull.
"I understand you were being chased by some creature, but it's a miracle you're the only one who ended up here." Her eyes narrowed and her frown nearly punched through the floor. "I heard you set your own leg. What on Equestria possessed you to do such a foalish thing?"
"I knew what I was doing." I shrank away from her, retreating into the mattress as far as I could.
"You obviously didn't know what you were doing if you tried it in the first place." Redheart snorted derisively. "Compound fractures are a serious matter to be handled by trained medical ponies only."
"I didn't intend on visiting a hospital, so there were no medical ponies as far as I was concerned. You know full well I did it well enough. Otherwise I'd have more than just a simple IV drip."
She sighed, casting the heavy bags under her eyes into relief. "I treat physical injuries, not mental or emotional ones, so I can't justify or even pretend to understand what you have against hospitals. But, I will admit you could have done far worse. Don't take that as acceptance for it. If you do it again, well, I'll just leave that to your imagination." Redheart’s smirk could have given a penguin hypothermia. "Do you understand?"
"Yes, ma'am." I’d do fine if she would have just stopped looking at me. I'd have rather been back with the zombies than stuck in a room with her.
"Good. I'll have some lunch sent up to you shortly. You will eat it."
"Bloody hell, just make her shut up already," Dave moaned from the corner. He cowered as far away from the sunlight as possible and had his bowler hat clamped over most of his face.
Redheart followed my gaze, using her freaky nurse mumbo jumbo to discern I wasn't just looking off into the distance. "Hallucinations too?" she tutted. "I'll order a head scan."
"I'm fine, they're old hat. And I'm pretty sure you need my permission for tests now that I'm conscious." It was a shot in the dark about Equestria's medical laws, but there was a good chance I had a choice in this matter. couldn't smirk, couldn't smirk, couldn't smirk. Ah crap.
"My hat is not old."
Somewhere, something inexplicably burst into flames from the ferocity of the stare Redheart shot me. I hadn't experienced the Stare from Fluttershy (or even met her for that matter), but I couldn't fathom it being worse than this. Compared to this, the Penance Stare was a come-hither look.
"Head injuries are no joking matter. I strongly recommend you have a scan spell done."
"It's nothing physical. I'm not getting any more tests done." My instincts screamed at me to break eye contact, but I had to stand strong or I would give in to her demands and be stuck in this sterile death trap for even longer.
For an eternity, we glared at each other, neither giving the other an inch of purchase. If Nurse Redheart was surprised at my resistance, she didn't show it. The hospital room shattered around us, leaving two wills to battle in a sea of white.
"Nurse Redheart, the, um, visitors are wondering if you've finished the checkup. They would really like to make sure Sterling Gears is alright." The room reformed as a worried voice spoke from the doorway. Leaning to look at the speaker, I saw a faded-magenta mare with a purple and white striped mane tied in the same fashion as Redheart's. The cross on her nurse's cap was white, surrounded by four pink hearts, and set on a red circle. It contrasted sharply with Redheart's, whose was identical except for being red and lacking a circle.
Redheart's expression instantaneously changed as she faced her coworker. "Sure, Sweetheart, I was just about finished. I'll head down the cafeteria and have them send some food up. Go ahead and tell her friends they can see her now." After a final, quick glare at me, she left the room and her hoofsteps faded down the hallway.
Nurse Sweetheart made sure the disturbingly intimidating nurse was out of earshot and relaxed. She turned to me, gently smiling, and asked, "She didn't give you too much trouble, did she?"
"This Sweetheart gal is a saint. Why are we in a hospital though? What happened to your leg? How drunk did you get last night?" Dave tapped his foot as he waited for an answer. Grumbling, he added, "Whatever, just tell me when you're alone."
I hadn’t realized my breath had been held since the battle of wills began. "Not too much. Thanks for the save."
She nodded while double-checking the machinery. "She means well. She just wants to make sure ponies get the help they need."
"She could stare down Celestia with those eyes."
"You got the Redheart Eyes? She must like you." Sweetheart chuckled. "Refuse a test?"
"Yep, didn't want a head scan. I wanted to get out of here as quickly as possible before Redheart found me."
"Well, Nurse Redheart does know her medicine, so it would probably be in your best interests, but if you refuse it, we can't give it to you. I'm going to go fetch your visitors, though I should warn you, one of them is a diamond dog." She whispered the last words fearfully, as if they might be listening from around the corner.
"Oh? Which one?" I was earnestly impressed one of them entered town.
"He said his name was Spot. Short fellow, likes to talk a lot, ring any bells?"
"Yeah, I know him. Don't worry about him though, he's a friend. Send them in. If we can fit all the visitors in here, that is. How many are there?"
"Just him and Vinyl Scratch. Mayor Mare also wanted to speak with you about the diamond dogs once you were conscious, but I have to send a messenger first. After all, she can't afford to sit around in the waiting room when she has a town to manage." After apologizing for Redheart again, she left, and a short while later I heard eager hoofsteps and the telltale clickety-clack of claws.
"What do you mean you guys don't have any music down there?" Vinyl asked her companion.
Familiar, broken Equestrian replied, "We howl. Not have pony instruments to play."
Vinyl entered first, her hooves sliding on the smooth, tiled floor. "Hey, Gears, what's up?" If she were hungover as well, she was handling it like a champ.
"Not much, just trying to come up with an escape plan. I heard you got a concussion. How are you feeling?"
"I've got a headache, but I'm sure that's just the alcohol. Wouldn't be the first time I've had my head messed with, although I usually prefer it to be my choice." She flashed an award-winning grin as she stood by the bed.
Spot grunted as he came into the room, scratching around the face mask he wore. It bulged comically as it tried to contain his mustache. "Why pony stuff so itchy?" His coat was oddly clean and could almost be considered lustrous.
"Hey, Spot. I didn't miss anything interesting did I?"
"Weird noises from deeper tunnels. Scouts find nothing. Beta okay?"
"I'll live. I'm glad to see you two are getting along. And, Spot, I'm happy one of the pack visited me in town."
"Don't worry about it, Spot's pretty cool. We've had plenty of time to chat while we waited for you to wake up." Vinyl shrugged. I could barely make out the squinting behind her signature shades. "Though I am going to have to introduce some music to these guys. Sick beats for sick dogs."
"You can close the curtains if you want. I know nobody here is a fan of sunlight at the moment." I snorted as Vinyl dashed to the curtains and hastily slammed them together. "No magic while hungover?"
"Not if you dislike headaches." She and Dave sighed in relief at the welcome shade. "So much better."
"How did you find out I was here?"
"Blue pony say you here." Spot eagerly nodded. Vinyl clarified that he was speaking about her brother. He uncomfortably shifted his weight to his other arm. "He not say pony floor so flat and smooth though. Or that dog need bath and still need stupid hair mask. Had to go to pony bath place."
"I think that's more for his breath than his hair." Dave snorted. "At least I can handle these two. Well, as long as Spot doesn't talk too much."
"You went to the spa?" Vinyl's mouth dropped open and she laughed. "How much did Aloe and Vera like that?
Spot uneasily shrugged. "They say they like challenge and new experience. They very nice and smell pretty. They also glad to only take a sapphire for whole thing."
"Nothing too big I hope. Last I heard, sapphires went up in demand," Vinyl said.
"Sapphire common. Also diamond dog always dirty from digging." He shrugged again. His eyes lit up as he spotted the chairs and cushions.
"Well, if it's any consolation, you clean up great, Spot." I wasn't lying either. He really did look much better when he wasn't encrusted with dirt, and I absently mused about how the rest of the pack would look if they got cleaned up. I got the feeling that if they started going into town more often with Pinkie and I in charge, Aloe and Vera would become very wealthy.
"I don't think I've seen you before, but I'm going to agree with Gears anyway." Vinyl nodded and patted Spot on the shoulder as he finished moving one of the chairs. He smiled uneasily from the compliments as he sat down and stammered his thanks.
“Did they figure out what attacked us last night?”
Vinyl rubbed the side of her head. “No, but it sounds like there’s more than one out there. A few ponies have gone missing.”
That’s not what I wanted to hear. A few disappearances is how it starts—next thing you know, you’re beating zombies off with a stick that has a machete tied to it. “Shit.”
“You said that a couple times last night. What’s it mean?”
I’d almost forgotten ponies had expletives, considering I only used them to bother Dave. “Same thing as horseapples, I think.”
”I’m getting tired of these ponies and their elementary school expletives. Are any of them still worth using?”
Dave had a point—in the future, I would have to cuss out a pony in the name of science. For now, I needed to figure out how much trouble we needed to prep for. “How many?”
“Three? I didn’t get any names. Me and Tall would have been on that list if it weren’t for you and your wagon, so really, thanks.”
“No problem. Just wish I’d installed airbags and seatbelts.” More confused looks. “Don’t worry ‘bout it.”
Somebody knocked on the door and called out, "Lunch delivery for Sterling Gears."
"Got it." Eager to do something other than just listen, Spot scrambled to open the door and received a startled gasp for his kindness. His ears flattened slightly while the mystery pony apologized profusely and pushed the cart into the room.
He wore a forced smile as he set a tray on the bed and listed the contents. He nervously looked around before adding that Redheart demanded I eat every last bite. Rumor has it if you say her name three times in front of a mirror in a dark room, Nurse Redheart will show up and give you medical aid.
"Can I get anypony anything else? Or, anydog? Sorry if that's not the right term." The mauve, lanky stallion spoke in hushed tones, like even his most enthusiastic greeting would come out as apologetic.
"No, you right. Anydog. Everydog. Somedog." Spot counted off the words on his claws.
"I think we had it right with tacking body on the end of everything. Would definitely work here since they all have bodies." Dave scowled from his dark corner.
"I would kill for a daffodil sandwich." Vinyl pushed her face closed to his, chuckling as he yelped and backed away. "Relax, it's just a figure of speech. Probably. I’m starving."
"And you, sir? I don't know if we will have anything though. We mostly just have pony food, and I don't know if diamond dogs eat, you know..." He refused to make eye contact with anything but his own hooves.
"Meat?" He gave me a meek nod. "They're lithovores. You know, gems and rocks?"
Letting out the largest sigh of relief in history, he replied, "Oh, of course. We actually do have some in storage for when Princess Twilight Sparkle's assistant visits. They have an incredibly long shelf life, as you can imagine. I'm sorry I assumed you ate meat. I mean, we're prepared for treating griffons, but we haven't had one as a patient as long as I've worked here. I just don't think I'd be able to handle serving dead animals on a plate."
"I never would have guessed." At least the stallion was warming up ever so slightly. "Did you want anything, Spot?"
"Have topaz?"
"Sorry, there's a topaz shortage. You probably won't find one in all of Ponyville."
"Shortage? We have lots, it just tasty gem. Emerald?"
"Certainly, I'll bring one up. I'll also put in a suggestion for increasing the gem stocks if there’s a chance we’ll be getting more diamond dog visitors. Be right back." He was definitely more relaxed as he left.
"No need to be polite and wait for us, Gears, I can hear your stomach rumbling. Dig in." Vinyl turned her attention from my food to Spot. "Sorry he was so scared around you. Diamond dogs get a bad rap."
He waved her off. "No. It our fault. We not always been nice to ponies." Spot scratched his ear and shrugged. "Rover not like ponies. New alpha and beta much nicer."
"Honestly, I didn't entirely believe you when you told us you were in charge of a pack last night. But then these guys are all 'sure, we know Gears, she kicked our butts to Trottingham and back'." Her mouth watered as she sniffed at the air. "If you don't eat that, I'm going to steal it."
A few bites of the garlicky pasta reminded me of the food Spike had cooked. "Spot, take a look in my saddlebags over there. See if you can find some cookies with gems in them. Hopefully they didn't get too messed up in the crash."
Watching a diamond dog try to delicately search through a saddlebag is surprisingly entertaining, and Vinyl and I struggled to keep a straight face. If I could just get my hands—hooves dammit—on some peanut butter, I could probably sell tickets.
He cried out with excitement as he held up a mostly intact cookie speckled with pinkish-red gems. "Rest is crumbs." His eyes widened the moment it touched his tongue. "This good food. You call it cookie?"
"Yep, Spike made them."
"Who Spike? He good cook. Pack would love recipe."
"Small purple dragon. I think you've met him before." This was going to be awkward.
Spot's shoulders sagged and every ounce of posture shifted from relaxed to submissive. He whispered, "Oh. He not want talk to us certainly. Not after making Miss Rarity work." At the dramatic fashionista’s name, he winced.
"He told me he was in the mood for some topazes last time I spoke to him. If you brought him some and apologized, I'm sure you two could resolve the issue. Not to mention you could probably teach him a few diamond dog recipes. Ethnic food always has a certain appeal, after all." I spoke between bites of the pasta. While bland compared to other food I'd had in Ponyville, it was still a step above hospital cuisine back on the old world.
"Will try, I guess. Cookie is worth it."
The modest stallion returned with another cart and hoofed the food items to my visitors. He apologized to Spot again for his rude behavior before leaving. Vinyl's sandwich was gone before I even realized she took the lid off the tray. Spot loudly crunched on the gem, a sound not unlike glass being crushed, and was satisfied with the taste.
"Ms. Gears?" a wisened voice called out after a terse knocking. "May I enter?"
"Of course, Mayor Mare." She sounded exactly like she had in the show, so chances are it was the correct pony. I didn’t know what I’d do if I found a character who spoke radically different from what I was used to.
A tan pony elegantly strolled into the hospital room with her head held high, her wavy, grey mane and tail styled professionally. She wore a collar with teal ruffles poking out of the front, like she had just forgotten where the rest of the suit was. Gold-rimmed glasses remained perched on her snout as she calmly nodded towards everybody present. Vinyl scrambled to inconspicuously wipe the grisly sandwich remains off her face.
"I'm glad to see you are conscious. I hope you were informed of my wishes, as we have much to discuss." Was that a hint of worry in her eyes?
I nodded in understanding. "Spot, I'll need you here to make sure I don't get anything wrong about diamond dogs. Vinyl, you can stay if you'd like, but I'd understand if you want to go do something entertaining—it's about to get diplomatic in here."
"You and diplomacy mixing usually results in someone shooting at you."
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Yay! More Gears! Can always have more Gears
yaaaaaaaaaaaay
Outstanding! Keep it coming, it has all been gold so far
Look, i'm going to be honest with you here..... I love this story and i love your update speed. Now just get a bit bigger chapters and I will personally create multiple accounts to inflate this story's rating and any other stories you like
Ha! just kidding! or am I?.......... I hope to negotiate terms with you soon.
also $20...... man i AM terrible at bartering.
2842932
Normally probably, but Gears's thinking is that it's a small price to pay for getting out of that hellhole. Simply put: a body is a body.
2842962
Twenty dollars is twenty more than I have. The chapters end when they want to, I don't have much control over it, and personally, I feel that padding the length would only detract from the story. I'm not saying no, I'm just saying they have no set length.
2843304 So the chapters are sentient are they?
Very well then! I assume you act as their agent yes? Please pass my offer along to the chapters as well as my interest in more of their kind. As for padding... while some is good for flavoring i don't want any fat kids.
I shall wait for you to contact your clients. Good day!
One more thing!.... emoticons, too much? wrong ones? Budding signs of insanity? please, your opinion. (hmm maybe it's the ps at the end that's insane?)
2846279
Don't worry about the emoticons, you're doing fine as long as it doesn't make anyone's eyes vomit.
2846310 man alive(as a pony) you are a fast responder.
2846354
I do what I can ^_^
I will literately explode if this story ends prematurely...
I AM TALKING FULL, FLAMING FIREBALL HERE!!
its like that movie where if you go lower than 66 miles pre hour, you die. Except its if there is less than... 2? seems fair... NO! If there's less than 4 chapters a week, the world will be attacked by zombies... then the fire nation..
2847782
That would be Speed.
2846851
No worries, not everything can be golden. I understand Gears's personality doesn't really lend itself to emotional crises even when she does have them. I also get what you mean about not much happening in #16, but I did just finish up a relatively high action scene in the preceeding chapters and this one was more about lesser, more sociable events.
What exactly was the creature that (tried) attacked them?
2851976
Spooky
2852508 Sir Spooky from A Ghost Story?
warosu.org/data/tg/img/0313/85/1397150140463.gif
INCORRECT
NO
There is now blood fucking everywhere. Those things are basically hooked in there. That is like ripping out barbed wire. Have him rip the wire out of the bag instead and tie the thing off or something.
What is he doing?! There are zombie-shades and missing people, he should be screaming for the guards to set up a perimeter around the town not enjoying sandwiches. That's what I expected from him due to all the paranoia and obsession with never losing anyone again.
I guarantee the shade things aren't zombies or zombie related in any way. It's to do with the evil locked up underground the dogs were talking about.
Sterling Gears Solid, anyone ?