The time ticked away, tortuously. Every tick was a knife into Twilight's side, a dagger to the mind. Meticulously she planned what it was that she was going to do. Every single detail, every single possibility, every scenario, all of them playing, simultaneously, as Twilight thought everything through. Stay calm, Twilight, stay calm. The words will come, we know they will, they must, they always have done. But what if they aren't okay with "this"? What if-
"Twilight, darling, you mustn't fret. Worrying about anything won't help, it will hinder. It will make you nervous, put you on edge; that won't help anything."
"But what if-" Twilight went to vocalize her doubts but, as if Rarity could read her mind, instantly cut her off.
"Now, dear, I know that Rainbow Dash can sometimes be a little 'lary', so to speak, but she is a good pony at heart, they all are, you have almost nothing to worry about. Now relax, they'll be arriving soon." They'll be arriving soon?Those were the words Twilight feared the most. Where did all the time go? I had plenty of time, I know I did. It's too soon, too soon!
"Um... Rarity? Do I really need to do it today? Can't I do it some other time, maybe?" She uttered those words, but both mares knew that this wasn't to be put off any more, she knew she was in too deep. She knew that this was it.
"Oh, Twilight, don't be silly. I told them all that there was big news you had to tell them, you can't back out know. They should be arriving in around fifteen minutes. Tea?" Twilight nodded politely, but this was just standard etiquette; Twilight hardly even heard Rarity's offer, she was already deep in thought once more.
Fifteen minutes? That is not enough time. No! Come on, Twilight, this is happening. Happening as in now, soon, fifteen minutes. Be casual, stay calm. If I think I'm calm maybe I can act calm? Can I trick myself? No. No, of course I can't. I never was the best at mastering doublethink. Twilight paused for a second, she noticed a teapot, levitating in front of her, which is not the most natural or prudent place for a teapot to be located. With a conciliatory nod and a short "Thanks" she took the burden of the teapot off of Rarity and set it, softly, on the nearest table.
As she was performing this menial task she caught a glance at the time, 3:55.
"Don'y worry, dear, don't panic. It'll all be over, soon enough." Once again it was as if Rarity possessed total knowledge of the workings and thoughts of Twilight's mind. Twilight didn't mind Rarity knowing her thoughts, in fact it calmed her a good deal; knowing that her thoughts were not for her, alone, to tackle. She's right, I can get through this, I will get though this. The thoughts seemed to tempt fate; no sooner did she think these thoughts did she hear a rapping on the door. Rarity approached Twilight and placed a calming hoof on her shoulder. Softly she said,
"I'll get it, you just get yourself ready, dear, won't you?" She shot a calming smile at Twilight, seconds of silence passed, filled with nothing but the air of understanding between the two. Again Twilight felt as if Rarity could see her thoughts, and sought to calm them. This was broken by a repeated, louder rapping upon that door.
Through, in the main room, Twilight could hear the amiable greetings at the door, exchanged between the five friends. After the friends had sufficiently greeted one another Twilight heard a smaller voice, ushering them into the room Twilight stood, ready, waiting.
Once everyone had settled down, Rarity took control once more, in order to finally reveal why they had all gathered.
"Now, everypony, I know you must all be wondering why it is you are all hear. Well Twilight has something she wants to tell you all. Twilight?" The time had came, finally. No more delaying, no more time to over think every specific aspect. Twilight stood up to address the room, address her friends, finally.
"Um... well, you see, everyone, um," she paused, and looked out towards her friends. At first she saw Pinkie Pie, smiling as wide as she always did. Secondly she saw Fluttershy, who had crawled out from under her fringe to cast Twilight a reassuring smile. Then there was Applejack, who had an inquisitive look on her face, yet it, too, was a look of reassurance. This was much the same as Rainbow's look, who was also inquisitive, but reassuring; everyone understood that Twilight was nervous, and they took steps to counter this. Spurred on by the kind looks, Twilight continued.
"Well... I happen to... 'like'... other mares." What followed was a somewhat anti-climatic reaction. The room was still silent, and Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy still smiled exactly as they had before. However Applejack and Rainbow Dash reacted differently. It's not as if they reacted overtly 'badly', but the news had changed their facial expression somewhat. Applejack seemed to squint, as if she was trying to comprehend something far too advanced for her, maybe it was just shock. Painfully Twilight was able to glance upon Rainbow, who, out of all the ponies reacted the 'worse'. Once again her facial expression almost exactly mirrored Applejack's, however, instead of looking confused she looked on edge, as if clandestine anger was building up inside of her. But she kept quiet. Even after a while the look of slight distaste disappeared from her face.
It took time for the dust to settle; other than the initial declaration Twilight had no idea of what to say. She looked over to Rarity, her face pleading, begging for a way out. Seconds passed, but the silence still reigned, it seemed that Rarity, too, had no idea of how to tackle this situation. In a desperate plea for help she looked towards her other friends, hoping that one of them may at least break the silence. Fluttershy wasn't an option, the shy pegasus would never break this silence, and Twilight was too afraid to focus once more on Applejack or Rainbow Dash, afraid of how they felt and what they may say. Still Pinkie remained cheerful, seemingly unaware of the situation around her, she was Twilight's hanging thread, her light in the darkness. Twilight focused deeply on Pinkie, in the hope that she would understand that Twilight was feeling for a response, a break from the silence. Please, please, please, Pinkie, say something. You will know what to say, just say anything to make this right. Eventually Pinkie seemed to notice the mounting awkwardness that was filling the room around her, she noticed Twilight's pleading eyes and the crushing silence. Finally she piped up, physically bouncing to Twilight, embracing her in a close hug.
"Oh, Twilight, that's great! I've never had a fillyfooling filly for a friend. Isn't it great guys? We should totally throw a party to celebrate!" Pinkie spurred life back into the room, once more there was visible movement, a visible stirring of her friends.
"Isn't it just superfantasticallyawesome, Applejack?" Broken away from her seemingly deep thought, Applejack was forced to voice an opinion, an opinion that she may had not thought through entirely yet. Her squinted look of confusion replaced by an awkward smile.
"Um, sure, Pinkie, if that's what Twilight wants to do." Applejack murmured these words out as quick as she could, trying to pass off the attention to some other pony; she was visibly uncomfortable with the situation Pinkie had thrust upon her. Luckily even Pinkie could see that she was making Applejack uncomfortable, and she sought to rectify that as soon as she could. Unfortunately the only way she could think to defer attention was to place it on someone else.
"What about you, Dashie, huh?" Pinkie was calmer, gentler in addressing Rainbow. She was calmer now, as she realised that the room around her was not as hyper as she, herself, was. The whole affair was torture to Twilight, waiting for the truth to finally pour out of Rainbow. She could only think of one thing, one phrase, as she waited for the unavoidable response. Please don't hate me, please don't hate me, please don't hate me.
"I-I'd rather not talk about it, Pinkie." Rainbow's face was unchanged from the ambiguous look of possible contemptuousness, but her voice sounded normal. No anger in her words, no hate, no scorn, nothing. Pinkie replied with her usual, cheery "Okie dokie lokie.", but she was still the only happy pony in the room.
Once again Twilight took a cursory view of the room, of what she had done. She had made her friends uncomfortable, she had made her friends feel awkward. She hated herself for this, she hated that she had made her friends feel this way. Once more she looked at Rarity, begging her to make it stop, make everything stop. Fortunately Rarity did act upon this cry for help.
"I do think Twilight is quite finished what she had to say. This was... insightful... So if nopony has anything left to say then I think we are all done here." Taking the hint, the four other ponies excused themselves in silence, grateful to be given the opportunity to escape. Rarity, Fluttershy, Applejack all left the room in relative silence, all of them exchanging glances from one another. Rarity dismissed them in the courteous manner that she was accustomed, and finally returned to comfort Twilight.
The now crying mare was happy for the consolation, but insisted on being left alone. All Twilight wanted to do was return to her Library and lose herself in her thoughts once more.
Good lord, I find this story finally and THIS is where you leave me off at? Why? WHY!!! WHYY!!!!!!!
Nice work so far, it's good to see more Twilight being the one infatuated rather than Dash and so far you've done a great job telling it. By all means continue.
That was too short
AN UPDATE OMFG
I can't say I like the short blurb style of writing, but it does give the story a different feel from others. All of the chapters written to be as short as they are, and indeed a few few like the introductions to chapters rather than what we usually see as chapters in their own right, but they're so condensed and presented to us in the beginning and ending chapter format so that we're intended to take them as such, the slight modifications necessary in making such small events in the plot actual chapters creating--almost certainly unintentionally--a strange style. A lot of times it feels like the story is simply too short, but there are other times, about half, actually, where it feels like it almost fits.
I don't quite know if it is benefiting to a legitimate story to have this structure instead of keeping it to works such as Candide (forgive me, the only one I can remember at this time of night that uses the same short chapters--actually, perhaps a little longer, but I digress), ones that aren't focused on delivering what you're trying to here, but I like the experimentation going on, unintentional as it may be.
I know this is overthinking it to the extreme, given that this was probably purely accidental, but you might want to think about using your short chapter lengths to your advantage. On to the merits of the story that're there on purpose"
Despite the undoubtably generic premise that comfortably fits many TwiDash and even shipping cliches, I'm pleased to see that you've made changes that make this fun to read. The first and most obvious is that this story follows Twilight. That's unusual in itself, but then you have us spend a lot of our time inside Twilight's head. Some of the things she thinks about is standard, and I feel like you could have punched it up a bit, but it's still enough to hold the reader's attention, for the most part. I like how Rarity tries to convince Twilight that while she feels no different, her friends might not feel the same way. It's odd, but it's different, and the effect on Twilight was fun to see.
...
It's weird, because after going back through to write this, I see that what I've recapped is much of the story. But that's pretty much how to best sum up the story: weird. It has a weird style due to the chapter length and the almost formal style, and going along generic paths with some twists along the way. It's not Shakespeare, but it's totally up my alley, and I hope you continue to deliver the same quality in future chapters as in the previous.
damn cliffhangers
oh you son of a gun you leave me at that......i new applejack was going to think badly about this but rainbow too......keelah twilights doomed
Oh shit, Twi. Rainbow Dash and Applejack may or may not be homophobes.
Omg. Is Rainbow Dash not a lesbian? Maybe shes just confused. Maybe Applejack is just mad. Maybe its vise-versa for that. IDK OMFG MOAR.
I felt really nervous for Twilight and that's the first time that's happened to me in a fanfic. AWESOME JOB!
"Don'y worry, dear, don't panic.'
'She's right, I can get through this, I will get though this.'
'Twilight?" The time had came, finally.'
That moment when you don't have to wait to read moar!
Doublethink? 1984 reference anyone?