Ch6 - Games, Missteps, and Miscreants
Celestia’s Tiny Student
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Chapter 6
Games, Missteps, and Miscreants
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Five years before Nightmare Moon's return
"Rise and shiiiiine, princess!"
Celestia groaned and tried to ignore the hoof that was now prodding her energetically in the cheek. Rise and shine... that seems quite ironic, considering I am the princess who raises the sun every day; I can’t believe it’s been about a year, since I’ve had to actually wake my student up in the morning.
Uuggghhh. I do not envy those ponies who have to wake up to go to work in the middle of the night.
She opened her eyes groggily to see the beaming face of her little student watching her with a smile. “Tea? Food? Or maybe just some refreshments, Princess?” Twilight’s voice was entirely too cheerful for this time of day, a perfect antidote for her morning apathy.
How the times have changed. "Yes, please," she answered drowsily before giving her student a good whiff of her morning breath with a long yawn. Twilight frowned as Celestia’s head plopped down on the pillow again, as always. She used her magic to lift the princess’s head back up, and levitated a cup of tea to Celestia’s mouth, hoping to rouse the princess from her slumber. With a drowsy murmur, Celestia opened her eyes again, wrapping the cup in her own magic before taking a delicate sip of its rejuvenating contents. Though many didn’t know it, the very fate of Equestria often rested on whether or not the Princess of the Sun got her morning tea.
She sat up, watching as her student trotted off towards the food waiting for them on the endtable. I don’t know why she decided to act like a servant towards me, but I really can’t complain. She’s obviously enjoying helping me out whenever she can, and who am I to keep her away from that?
Perhaps I need some of her energy. With nearly a thousand years of peace and a plentiful number of servants and government workers, I am nowhere near as fit as I should be, nor should I be as lazy as I am now.
"Thank you, Twilight," Celestia replied with a smile, rolling off of her bed and walking over to the mirror on top of her dresser. She took a few sips from her teacup as she brought a brush to her mane, which had formed an unruly corona around her head. The thing may be beyond the clutches of gravity, but it was certainly not going to be cooperative all the time.
Satisfied that she looked presentable and wiping the last of the crust out of her eyes, Celestia looked back to her student at the table, who was already levitating the first of her golden horseshoes. With a small smirk at her enthusiastic student, Celestia raised a hoof and allowed Twilight to fit the shoe on before repeating the process for the rest of her royal garb. It was not long before she had both her gorget and her crown on. After a quick casting of Twilight’s protection spell, she briskly trotted over to the balcony where her faithful student had appeared with a flash of teleportation.
With a burst of magic, Celestia began her daily ritual. The sun rose, spreading its warming embrace over Equestria, as the first tendrils of its rays crawled over the vast horizon.
Even after having seen it so often, Twilight still applauded briefly before looking to the princess and asking, “So, what are we going to do today, Princess?”
The princess’s eyes trailed upwards as she pondered the question, “Well, perhaps we should do something other than our magical training this morning.” She gave Twilight a devilish smile. “How does a game sound to you?”
“That sounds wonderful, princess! But what kind of game did you have in mind?” Twilight asked excitedly.
Her question was swiftly answered when Celestia’s giant hoof flew over to poke her lightly on the nose. “Tag! You’re it!” she called out, before rushing back into the room.
A large grin stretched across Twilight’s face. Tag was nothing new for them and the rules had been very clearly set to give both of them a fighting chance. The area of play was always confined to Celestia’s bedchamber—though considering the size of the room, “confined” was being applied fairly liberally—and Twilight was the only one that was allowed to use her magic. Celestia was to remain earthbound and without spells, but with her reach and stride, she was still a tough target.
“Not for long!” Twilight shouted, before teleporting back to her pillow on the princess’s bed.
She took a quick glance around as she landed softly, quickly spotting her mentor standing to the side of the bed away from the balcony. With another bright flash of teleportation, Twilight relocated herself to the night stand behind Celestia, leaping off towards the princess as soon as she could get her hooves under her.
With a grin, Celestia jumped wildly to the left as soon as her student disappeared and was rewarded when Twilight landed unceremoniously on the floor where she had stood. She quickly retreated while her faithful student shook out the stars in her vision.
Twilight quickly recovered from her daze, and after realizing her mentor had torn off out of her line of sight, she gathered up her magical energy and teleported to the bed again.
She found the princess standing next to the large double entrance doors, with a smirk still on her face. Wasting no time, Twilight again drew up the energy to teleport onto Celestia’s back, but as soon as she reappeared, she realized that the princess was no longer there. She gave a yelp as she dropped into thin air but managed to reassert herself enough to tumble out of a bad landing, soon galloping after her mentor.
Celestia jumped back slightly every time Twilight came closer, even bounding over her tiny student once she had backed herself up into a corner, blowing Twilight a raspberry as she prepared for whatever the tiny mare was about to do. Twilight had given an adorable pout, but had not begun to chase after her immediately. She decided to trot after Celestia, rather than sprint after her, and the princess was fine to play along until Twilight disappeared in another flash.
Celestia once more jumped to the left, only to be surprised as Twilight landed squarely on her muzzle, having teleported not directly above Celestia, but above where she was going to sidestep her attempts to tag her. With a bop between the eyes, Twilight stated smugly, “You’re it.”
"Excellent work, my faithful student, but I’d start running now if I were you," Celestia commented, and without any further prompting, Twilight disappeared in a flash of light.
Celestia scanned the room quickly, but found no sign of where her elusive student had gone. “Hmmm, I wonder where my faithful student has gone this time,” she mused playfully, before she began trotting over to her bed smiling. Twilight may have been small and much better at playing hide-and-seek, than playing tag with the giant Celestia, but she was sorely lacking in imagination when it came to her hiding places. She bumped her shoulder against her bed, lifting it easily to find a tiny purple filly gaping at her from under it. Sure, she could have taken a quick glance down there as always, but the look on her student’s face was priceless.
“Gotcha,” Celestia boasted as Twilight bolted from her hiding place. The princess dropped the bed and began pursuing her target, trapping her in a corner of the room. Twilight looked around for someplace to hide, and in a panic she gathered up her energy to teleport away once again.
Without missing a step, Celestia looked to her bookshelf and, after seeing a flash from behind a few books, quickly removed the obstacles and extended her hoof into the opening, bopping her student in the nose.
“Tag. You’re it.”
A good part of the hour had already passed, and both of them were exhausted. "I will get you, my faithful student. You can’t escape from your mentor that easily," Celestia declared as she took a few steps towards Twilight.
"You won't get me that easily!" Twilight yelled back, before desperately running straight towards Celestia. She’d long since run out of magic to teleport, and for now she was forced to rely on her size and agility to avoid her mentor's grasp.
Celestia’s attempt to stop Twilight failed, and her faithful student dove between her legs. With a yelp of surprise, the alicorn attempted to reassert her four limbs on the ground, as to give her a good view of her prey under her. Her own efforts caused Twilight to squeak a few times in fear as the mouse-sized mare was forced to dodge a tangle of hooves stomping down all around her.
Twilight dove left and right, as the massive horseshoes shifted all around her, sometimes missing her by only half a hoof’s length. She tried to suppress her fear, hoping to predict where each hoof was going to move, but with all four of them moving at once, she failed to foresee the single hoof stomping down directly in front of her.
Twilight stumbled back, landing supine on the carpet in shock. She took a moment to shake out the disorientation from her surprise.
Just in time to see the shadow of another hoof directly above her.
Twilight's eyes opened widely while her pupils shrank, her ears dropped and her mouth opened agape as if ready to scream, but whatever noise was about to leave her mouth was swiftly silenced by intense pressure on her body and a loud thump, as her mentor’s hard horseshoe-clad hoof pressed down against her. Feeling as squashed as a bug and unable to move a single limp, Twilight hoped that her mentor would mercifully lift her mighty hoof away soon, as the pain was making it impossible to focus on any kind of spell to aid her escape. The hoof’s pressure on her began to increase as her life flashed before her eyes.
***
Celestia looked under her stomach for her student, who had managed to disappear from her line of sight while she was fumbling around. It was not until she felt a squirming under one hoof, that she had realized what had happened.
She jumped back horrified as she looked upon the prostrate form of her student on the floor. “Twilight!” she exclaimed despairingly, before plopping down and sending a stream of healing magic into her student’s tiny body. “I’m so sorry, Twilight! I didn’t mean it! Please be okay! Please...”
Seconds passed, and there was still no movement. Celestia hung her head and shut her weeping eyes as a single tear slide on her cheek. "I'm so sorry, Twilight." She then looked back up, more tears forming in her eyes as she continued, "Please... Don't leave me."
"W-why would I... leave you...?"
Celestia exhaled a deep sigh of relief the moment those precious words reached her ears.
My most faithful student. Barely a fifteen-year-old mare, and already tough enough to withstand an alicorn-sized weight, not to mention having survived falling out of this tower all the way down to the Canterlot streets.
A quick scanning spell revealed surprisingly few injuries, both internal and external, that could not be fixed with magic or with a little bed rest. It’s truly a miracle from whoever designed this protection spell. Celestia gave another, quieter sigh. It wouldn’t be necessary if you were your original size. You don’t deserve any of the punishment that you’ve taken over the years. I long for the day that you’ll be able to control your surges, and I can finally restore you to your glory.
Twilight slowly raised her head off the floor, smiling weakly. "Please don't worry... I'm f-fine. It was... not y-your fault... and... we had some f-fun, didn’t we?"
Celestia shook her head, but she managed to smile. Oh Twilight... Only you could forgive me so easily for hurting you. She carefully levitated her student with her magic and turned to place her on the bed...
That was now lying sideways, on the other side of the room. Against the wall.
Celestia stifled a sudden snicker before levitating the bed back to its original spot and straightening it out. She dropped the pillows back onto the bed with a fluffy plop and placed Twilight gently upon her designated resting-place.
With that matter concluded, the princess then took a brief look around the room. Many of the room’s furnishings seems to have relocated themselves during their game. Books littered the floor and the bookshelf was now laying on its side, far away from its original position. Most of the paintings that were adorned the walls were no longer upright, and her dresser was an absolute disaster with the contents of its drawers scattered about on the floor. We’ve... made quite a mess here. Celestia took a quick glance at a nearby clock, which also happened to be slanted. There’s still a good amount of time left. It’d probably be a good idea to clean some of this up so the maids won’t faint instantly, when they come to tidy up. Or worse, so Twilight won’t try to clean it up herself when she should be resting from today’s events.
Celestia quickly began cleaning up the room, turning it into a whirlwind of golden magic as objects flew back to their rightful positions in the room, though she had to consult an extensive list for the exact order of the books on the bookshelf; Twilight would most definitely notice if there was even one book out of place.
Celestia had just finished triple-checking the list when the clock had chimed the hour, announcing an end to her time with her faithful student. She straightened up in surprise, before turning towards Twilight, who was now alert and observing her every step.
“Please don’t be frightened by me again, Twilight. I was careless today, but I promise to be more careful with you, so such accidents don’t occur again. You have my word.”
“Oh, don’t worry about it too much, Princess. I know it was an accident, and I’ve already forgiven you,” Twilight affirmed and gave the princess a sincere smile.
Celestia returned the smile, her mood already rising. I’m so proud of you, Twilight. It takes a strong pony to forgive somepony who has just hurt them. It makes me glad that you trust me so. I wish I’d been that way the last time I traveled as an ambassador.
Celestia gave a mental sigh as certain unpleasant memories began to resurface. Dragons. I don’t think they’ve ever been especially friendly with Equestria, but back during the Griffo-Draconic War, they’d been especially insufferable. It had gotten to the point when I couldn’t trust them to not lay a single claw on my ambassadors, and I had to go myself to impress upon them the might of Equestria. I still can’t believe that they’d pass off crushing me under a claw as an ‘accident.’ Twice.
She smirked slightly. Their attitudes had changed quite drastically when I dealt with them in their own language. Apparently, they could respect somepony who can stand for herself against a delinquent dragon. Regardless, it still took a long time before I began to trust them again, and—oh dear, I’ve been spending too much time here.
“Thank you for your kind words, Twilight. You have no idea how much they mean to me,” Celestia assured her student warmly. “However, I’m going to have to attend to my royal duties for now. Cadence and Spike will arrive shortly, to spend time with you so get your rest while you still can.” With that, Twilight gave a smile and a nod, and the princess departed from her chambers.
Twilight watched as the great double doors to Celestia’s bedchamber closed gently, with a soft click. A quiet exchange occurred behind them, which the little unicorn surmised to be the princess telling her guards about what transpired just moments ago, in her room.
Twilight laid her head down between her forelegs as the giant golden horseshoe that had threatened to grind her flat into the floor started plaguing her thoughts. In that moment, her fear of Celestia had returned in full force. That fear of the monster that could swat her away like an insect or crush her to jelly, with even her smallest movements.
Twilight sighed. It was one thing to know that she was small. It was another to actually feel it. It truly hammered home the concept that, at her size, she was nearly inconsequential to the world around her, like a mouse among mares. The thought that the warm and gentle hoof that had comforted her these past several years could so quickly turn into an unstoppable force of nature was horrifying. Being so completely helpless without her magic was very frightening. A single misstep could end her life, and that was terrifying.
Twilight frowned, knocking on her head a few times to clear her thoughts. There was no point in thinking these thoughts, when she’d already genuinely forgiven her mentor. A single misstep in the princess’s years of love and kindness could leave no malice in the young unicorn. The freedom of those same years, the freedom from the fear of the giants that inhabited her world, could not be besmirched by a single, ultimately inconsequential incident. There would be times to dwell on the past, but for now, it was time to move on to the future.
And with that, she curled up on her pillow and slept.
Princess Cadence hummed a little peppy ditty as she trotted towards Celestia’s bedchamber, loaded down with items for her new position as the royal foalsitter. This assignment was the latest in a long line of jobs to occupy her idle time, and to be completely honest, finding odd jobs here and there was a bit of a downgrade, compared to her original status as the Princess of the Crystal Empire. The nightmare that had poisoned the Crystal Heart and removed her realm from the planet’s surface gave her little choice in the matter, even with her aunts’ assistance in removing that... thing.
She shook her head to clear her thoughts. There were more than a few unpleasant memories in their long lives. After all, Aunt Celestia and Aunt Luna had given her all of their love, and a permanent home in Equestria. While she could not will herself to take up a job governing the Equestrian populace, helping out wherever she could was the least she could do to repay for their kindness.
I spent so much time learning illusion magic to blend into Equestria society as a common pony, but I only wish I had been with Aunt Celestia and Aunt Luna when they needed me the most. Instead, I was away at my lessons when they fought in the darkness...
Guilt tugged at her heart from the memory of finding her aunt at the ruins of the ancient castle, their beautiful palace torn to shreds by their battle and only Celestia left in a pool of tears, looking up at the moon and unable to let it go. She was the very symbol of love, she should have been able to see the fading bond that triggered the conflict before it flared up, there should have been something she could have done to prevent that horrible long night. It had taken hours for the two of them to raise the sun together, weeks worth of long sorrow where the wheels of government turned untended while the two of them grieved, only taking time to bring forth the day and night between their tears. Celestia’s bond with her beloved sun had weakened with her sorrow, and Cadence found herself with the difficult task of not only aiding the evening raising of the moon when Celestia’s will weakened at the thought of touching her sister’s place of imprisonment, but with the sun as well.
In the years that followed, Celestia rose from the ashes of her despair to both raise the sun and moon unassisted, and also to take over the governance of Equestria. It was Celestia’s land, her little ponies, and Cadence could not find it in her heart to step into the shoes of her lost sister and rule at her side. The irony of it all grated at her somedays, for while the royal sisters failed to save the Crystal Empire and took care of her in the wake of their failure, now it was Cadence’s turn to take care of Celestia after her failure to save Luna.
Today is not the time to dwell on the failures of the past, but to look forward to the future.
Cadence had passed the throne room and prepared to open the door to the rest of the castle, when a golden aura beat her to it, revealing a surprised Princess Celestia standing on the other side.
“Auntie Celestia!” Cadence exclaimed happily before wrapping her aunt in a tight hug, much to the princess’s sudden discomfort. “It’s been too long!”
“H-hello Cadence,” Celestia replied in a strained voice as Cadence released her. “Did you have fun in your last job?”
“Well...” Cadence murmured, shuffling her hooves and looking away from Celestia. “It wasn’t exactly fun, per se, but I learned an important lesson. That, and I’m pretty sure somepony else did too,” she looked back to proud alicorn, smirking.
"Oh? What lesson have you learned?"
"I learned that Manehattan Free Press is no place for an Alicorn of Love. I got really tired of writing those dirty articles after a few years; The boss there had no respect for other ponies’ privacy at all." Cadence gave a stomp of her hoof for emphasis before continuing.
“And when I tried to argue with him about it, he not only threatened to fire me, but also insinuated that he would ruin my reputation, and make it impossible for me to find another job if I’d left,” Cadence growled angrily before giving a triumphant smile. “Of course, I was still disguised as a regular pegasus when he said that. You should have seen his face when I dropped my illusion. Looked just about ready to sink into the floor, he did. Sounded like it too.”
Both of the princesses snickered.
“Let’s hope it’s a lesson he won’t forget anytime soon,” Celestia chuckled. Her tone turned inquisitive as she asked, “Now, just one more question: Why do you look so young? And why don’t you hide the fact that you’re an alicorn?”
Cadence looked back at her form. She did look exactly like a younger version of herself, complete with a subtle change in height. She looked back at Celestia and shrugged, “Well, you said in your letter that I’d have to foalsit your student; I’ve found that small fillies tend to be more relaxed around me if I look younger, perhaps only a few years older than they are. It’s all about less intimidation from size difference. As for hiding that I’m an alicorn, your student already gets a lot of exposure to you. I see no reason to apply an illusion spell on top of my temporary age-reduction spell, which already takes quite a bit of my energy to maintain.”
Celestia gave the filly alicorn a sly grin before smoothly replying, “I think you’re going to need much more than an age-changing spell, Cadence, to reduce the size difference between you two.”
Cadence gave her a blank look and tilted her head to the side slightly before asking confusedly, “What do you mean, auntie?”
Celestia simply chuckled in reply. “Don’t worry about it, Cadence. You’ll understand soon enough,” she said before trotting past the confused mare. She stopped suddenly and looked back. “ By the way, my student is really tired and is resting at the moment. You may start your foalsitting in about two hours. I will be busy for most of the day, but the guards may bring Spike along to play with you two, and I’m sure you’ll have a good time with both of them.”
She continued trotting along, leaving Cadence alone in the doorway thinking, Who’s Spike?
The Day Court began as usual for Celestia, but it unfortunately did not stay that way for long. Prince Blueblood had managed to secure an early spot in the line to see Celestia, and when his name was called, he approached the throne as the crowd of nobles in the benches watched him closely, with some even sitting up in interest as he proceeded down the center aisle.
Celestia gave a mental groan. Prince Blueblood, as a chosen representative of the upper-crust of Canterlot, was insufferably arrogant and selfish in public. It was one of the only ways he could secure such an influential spot in royal politics, what with the nobility as it was currently, but he had not always been this way. When he was under Celestia’s care several years back, Blueblood had demonstrated notably good character and poise, but his time among the bit-hoarding upper-class had forced his personality to change for the worse. The worst part about it was, it was an act he needed to play, both to gain the admiration of the nobility and to chase away any gold-digging mares chasing after him.
“Princess Celestia,” Blueblood stated, standing firmly in front of her with only a token bow of respect.
Not a good sign; it means that the nobility are not likely to take no for an answer here.
"Greetings, Prince Blueblood," Celestia said, nodding in return. "Why have you requested an audience with me today? I find it odd that you could not speak to me in private about your petition."
“Oh, please. I’ve already tried to do that several times, and more than once, you changed the subject once I’d brought it up.” He had an arrogant tone in his voice, but Celestia could see through his facade, and knew his arrogance was just for show. She could notice some desperation in his behavior as well—Blueblood felt thrown away, since every time he had wanted to visit Twilight or had asked for permission to do so, his request had been politely denied.
“Is this about my student, Blueblood?” Celestia’s face was impassive. It would not do to show weakness in front of the nobility.
"Indeed, it is," Blueblood replied, holding his head high. "The rumors that you’ve taken on a student have gained credibility once several nobles claimed to have seen her nearly a year ago. I have requested to see her multiple times, but your guards have turned me, a Prince of Equestria, away at your door. Not only that, there have been rumors that you’ve been keeping a pet dragon as well. Unless you are finally going to introduce your student and this dragon to us, I do not believe the nobility will look upon you as anything more than a tyrant who toys with her subjects. You’ve been hiding your student away from us for too long. I expect that you’ll come to your senses and do what is expected of you.”
Celestia suppressed the urge to massage her forehead. It’s one thing to deal with nobles when they’ve always acted like morons. It’s another to know that the nobles are forced to deal with you like morons. When exactly did politics change so that Blueblood needs to act like a prick to keep his status, again?
“Very well. I will allow you, and only you, to visit my student, but only under one condition,” Celestia replied authoritatively. “Twilight Sparkle, as my student, is both an intelligent and a powerful unicorn. She deserves your respect as an equal. This means that you will not attempt to harm her, nor will you tell her of the frankly ill-humored rumors spreading about her. If I find your meeting satisfactory, I will consider introducing my student to the public, but should you break this rule, I shall have to find a fitting punishment for your transgression.” Celestia raised her head slightly so that she was looking down at Blueblood, hopefully making it clear that she, not the nobility, was in charge here.
Blueblood translated Celestia's words in his head, My student is young and innocent, and I will let you visit her only if you'll be kind to her. Don’t be an arrogant snob around her, or I will personally spank your flank. He then snorted as he replied, “I’m offended that you’d think me so low as to take action against a filly. Don’t think that I will not show respect towards your student, even if she did come from a family of low breeding with an... imperfect bloodline.”
Celestia sat back slightly as she translated his words, How could you think I would abuse a pony you care so much about? I may act like I am a mean and arrogant pony, but you know I would never abuse those close to you. She dutifully ignored the quip about her student, barely. There was a reason that the nobles’ concerns were attended to separately from the rest of the populace. Still, it was disappointing that the upper-class had fallen so far as to promote this sort of language. "Good," Celestia replied. “Speak with my secretary, Silver Scroll. She will assist you in scheduling a time for you to see Lady Sparkle. You are now dismissed.”
Cadence trotted towards Celestia’s bedchamber, eliciting a bow from the two guards flanking it as she approached. She eyed the large, ornate double doors for a moment before raising a hoof to open it.
"Lady Cadence?" one of the guards on duty, a white pegasus, turned his head towards her. "I’m sorry, but you may not enter at this time. Her Highness, Princess Celestia, gave strict orders to keep anypony out who does not have her authorization."
Cadence gave him a nod as she replied, "I understand, sir, but I do indeed have permission from the princess. I’m here to foalsit her student, Twilight Sparkle." She drew a rolled piece of parchment out of her saddlebags with her light blue magic and presented it to the guard.
The charcoal unicorn guard on the other side grabbed the scroll with telekinesis before the pegasus could get a good look at it. She took a few seconds to scan the letter’s contents, particularly Princess Celestia’s signature at the bottom, before giving an affirmative nod. “Yep. She’s good to go. Have fun on the first day of your job. Twilight should be sleeping on her pillow right now; She’s had a rough morning, so be gentle.”
Cadence gave a curt nod, and the guards quietly opened the door for her. She trotted in confidently, despite the guard’s worries. After all, she had centuries to work on her foalsitting, and if Twilight Sparkle was growing to be a young mare, like Celestia told her, what’s the worst that could actually happen?
Cadence swept off her saddlebags with a glow of magic, placing it gently in the corner next to an old dusty dollhouse before surveying the room. She frowned. That’s odd... They said that Twilight would be sleeping on her pillow, but I don’t see her anywhere. Maybe she’s hiding?
“Twilight? Twilight Sparkle?” Cadence called as she walked slowly towards the center of the room. “It’s Cadence, your new foalsitter. You don’t have to hide, dear.”
"Twilight?” she repeated, stopping beside the bed and glancing towards the balcony window.
“Shmerrr...”
Cadence jumped several leg lengths away with a yelp, her eyes darting about as she looked for the source of the unexpected noise, before she noticed the large pillow on top of Auntie Celestia’s bed. And the little spot of color turning on top of it.
Is that... a purple mouse?
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I like the rewrite
2987246
Thanks.
Is there anything in old version what you preferred, or did everything improved ?
Also, if you will wait a little bit longer, I am about to upload final version of chapter 7, georg is doing final changes to it at the moment.
Shmerrr...
2987302
Twilight may be tiny, but she wake up loudly.
Emerhgerd Appers!
I've just read the old and new ch.6 and holy crackerjacks that was a choir and a half. The new one is far superior then the older one. It seems more fleshed out even with the lower word count.
That's all, if you want a better review please ask someone else.
2989249
Well, just one question really.
Is there anything in old version what should be carried to the new version ( or something what was better in old version ) ?
Also, I hope that chapter 7 will not disappoint you as well.
And by the way, did you liked chapter 5 and bonus chapter, I really hoped that those two will be most enjoyable to read.
OK I haven't reread the old version but I do think this is far better.
2989633
Thank you, also, what do you think of chapter 7 final version, or of new chapters I uploaded in general ?
I would definitively use your opinion about bonus what take place after prologue, especially about the flashbacks, as they focus on Celestia and Luna backstory.
This rewrite, I like it.
Looking quite good so far! Nicely done.
I'm happy to see that Twilight's natural fear of Celestia at her size came up again. It would be something very hard to will oneself past.
2994344
Being brave is not the same as not being afraid. Being brave mean being afraid and yet defeating those fears.
If anything, over the years Twilight was forced to face her fears all the time, if anything, she learned how to fight against them.
2989633
? No, really I am not meaning to be insulting, just frank when I say that that was a stupid word choice.
Okay before I put my two cents about the chapter in I gotta say this. How the hell can you compare the older version to this one if you hadn't read it
Now with that over I say that this whole fic is actually better in this version than the old one though this is one of my favorite lines ever:
3142323
He said, reread, it mean that he read the old version long time ago at one point, but he didn't got a chance to read it again and compare.
Celestia's interaction with Twilight is quite refreshing to see. So Cadance was around when the kingdom was lost originally, huh? My head-cannon is she's a descendent of the original rulers (Who were Alicorns but were killed by Sombra) who is the only one of her bloodline to become an alicorn, hinting to Celestia it was time for the Chrystal Empire to return. Blueblood as an acting jerk works well here as well.
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Thanks, though poor Twilight, she end up under a giant hoof after today's exciting and enjoying morning.
Well, I preferred Cadence as crystal pony who just like Twilight, Celestia and Luna, assented into alicorn, but one day was banished by Sombra and after losing her kingdom, she was forced to live in Equestria, on the other side, when Celestia banished Luna to the moon, Cadence was there to cheer up Celestia and help her with moon raising until Celestia became strong enough to do it on her own.
As for Sombra, I never saw him as unicorn to begin with, because it just make unicorns look like OP race ( Twilight, Sunset, Sombra ), I rather see Sombra as darkness incarnate who used Crystal Heart to gain physical form ( like when in the show he is under the light of crystal heart, and it turn him back to flesh and blood, I do not like the idea that he was turned into shadow, for me, he was a shadow to begin with, and he would take earth pony or a pegasus form and be just as powerful.
Yea, and it also show the glory of Equestria nobles politics, you need to act like a jerk to get on the top, with Fancy Pants as exception.
I wish I woke up like that.
rereading this story now
2989729 *squish* Opps! There goes another student!
Lol great chapter! Hahaha! Isn't that ironic? The Goddess of the freakin' sun isn't a morning person!
3149659 My head-canon is the one from the book "Twilight Sparkle and the Crystal Heart Spell".
5631393 And we all know she would too.
Oh, I hope Cadence doesn't freak out about the "mouse" in Celestia's bed before she realizes that it's actually Twilight.
Should be 'if you' or 'should you' or 'if you should'
I don't know if the translations are what the parties want to here, or what they would say if they weren't in a formal place, but this is quite funny
Freak out in T-minus 3. 2. 1.
Cap.
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Needs beginning " marks.
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"The same thing we do every day, Twilight. Try to take over the world!"
Twilight Sparkle
2015-2017
Killed by Cadences mouse trap
R.I.P.
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LOL
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IT'S AN ANGEL! (Nice profile pic.)
hahahahahaha
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She's Twilight and the Princess, yes Twilight and the Princess...
Danganronpa?
"Rise and shiiiiine, Ursine!"
Meh, found a few things. Not a professional or anything, so don’t take my word as gold.
If I were you, I would change “the noble is” here to “the nobles are.”
Like I was a mean an arrogant pony? No, like I am a mean an arrogant pony.
Yep; you guys are going to get yourselves a Voldemort one of these days.
ERROR
Princess Cadence.exe has suffered a critical error and has shutdown.
Would you like to restart the program?
Yes No
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Yes
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Please tell me you got at a laugh.
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I did laugh, yes.
BWAHAAAAAHAAAA
So another Blueblood isn't really a jerk story