Spike is at a new school and is already the class dork. He can't help falling in love with the most beautiful girl in school though. Can he get the attention of Rarity before the end of the semester?
Chapters (7)
TheNix
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hm... all I can really say is that it's a hard story to properly portray and be enjoyed, and for what you displayed here, it was fairly good
and having said that, I hope that this story entails Spike with proper intelligence, like a nerd or a geek, rather than a dork
me justa la historia pero me cuesta trabajo imaginarme a rarity de adolescente,a spike no tanto por que yo me vaso en esta imagen suya
t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRsPp6QR5RJO0do7_hSRJtgJ11UP37yrQRzHpLwFcdwfRNN8hfM
again, so far: pretty good
Not bad! The exposition in the first chapter did seem a bit long, but I enjoyed how thoroughly you developed Spike though. That really came through effectively.
My favourite part was Chapter 2, the dialogue exchange between Spike and Twilight. That was pretty hilarious.
Clean up the grammar a bit, and I think you have a fantastic story going!
well, as much as I don't like Rarity's rejection, she does have a point...
Apparently she cares a lil bit too much about her personal appearance.
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Here's another shocker: Fluttershy is shy
but seriously, it's a good chapter, even with the slight implausibility of Spike being the homecoming king and his date the queen (they both were elected at my prom)
I might be an idiot... but where did the gloves come from? his present was the leggings, I hadn't heard of the gloves until she threw them away (or at least I can't remember anything about them other than what's said [they were his])
that and I want to see where this wonderfully sad story goes...
PS I think it's very strange that a pair of pristine silk leggings with diamonds encrusted into them would be thrown into the trash... but it also reminds me of a real life story where an auction house accidentally threw away a painting worth $240,000 saying that it was rubbish
The gloves were my bad. I had gloves in mind at first but realized that doesn't work for ponies. Also Gems don't seem to be as rare in the pony world as Rarity finds them all over the ground and Spike snacks on them.
Are you still going to make a follow-up chapter involving the ten year reunion?
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I know it's been forever but I've had enough requests to write a bit more
Well. A story posted over two and a half years ago... To critique review, or not to critique review? Eh, I say not.
I liked it. It was predictable and you really need to work on showing instead of telling, Y'know painting a picture, describing surroundings and settings, but I liked it. It was sweet and ambiguous. For all we know Spike and Rarity get married, or for all we know Spike's already married and just wants to catch up with an old friend.