• Published 24th Jun 2013
  • 4,884 Views, 307 Comments

Diamond Tiara Likes Dating Sims - Mattricole



Diamond Tiara has always loved Dating Sims, but after playing one into the early morning, she discovers the innate ability to see choices.

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Diamond Tiara Likes The Wonderbolts

>Go to the park to find Scootaloo

Ugh, I can’t get Scootaloo’s blushing face out of my mind! I don’t know how to explain it. Hmm, maybe it’s because she’s such a tomcolt? Whatever, knowing her she’s probably at the park, playing with her stupid scooter, her mane and tail flowing in the wind, with that cute smirk of her’s adorning her face as she jumps off a ramp and-NO! This is...purely professional. I’m just going to find her, find out what’s wrong with me, and leave. That’s it.

With that in mind, I make my to the park, it doesn’t take me long, after all, it’s not like Ponyville is a big town. That’s what I hate most about this stupid town. It’s so small! First of all we only have one video game store, it sucks! What was I doing again? Oh, right, going to the park to find Scootaloo.

Finally after another minute or two of walking I arrive at the stupid park. Surprisingly there isn’t a whole lot of ponies around. I see a few, mostly couples having a picnic, but other than that I’m not seeing too many ponies. Well, I guess since I’m here I might as well start looking for Scootaloo, hopefully it won’t take too long to fi-

“Woo hoo!” And there she is, playing around on her scooter. Well, she’s as predictable as always. Now I just have to get her attention, but how?

>Wait until she’s done.

>Yell out at her.

>Throw a rock at her.

Pft, if I wait until she’s done, I’m going to end up being here all day, and I have better things to do! And why should I have to wait around for this stupid blank flank?! It should be the other way around!

I doubt yelling would do anything, she’s having so much fun I doubt I could catch her attention that way, so I guess there’s only one thing I can do.

>Throw a rock at her.

“This should do,” at least, I think it will. It’s a pretty decent sized rock, and with how thick of a skull that dodo bird has I doubt it will hurt her too much. Now I just have to wait until she’s close enough, and with the right timing I should be able to hit her. Should be easy enough, her moves are way too predictable, I’ll get her when she’s doing one of those mid air jumps.

“Whoo hoo!”

Perfect I think to myself as I threw the rock, right at her head. It was a direct hit, cracking her hel...I think I made a terrible mistake. Thankfully Scootaloo fell into a pile of mud so her landing was fine.

“Who did that?!” Hmm, can’t decide if I should walk away or go over and apologize. “It was you wasn’t it?!” How dare you?! I mean, yeah, I did it but that doesn’t mean you can just accuse me of doing it?!

“You should be thanking me loser,” I tell her as she rushes towards me, and get that glare off your face! What gives you the right to glare at me?! I don’t care if it’s...cute…those adorable eyebrows of her knitted together, her teeth clenched together as she stares right at me, her face getting closer until our noses are touching...what was I doing again?

“You cracked my helmet! And why should I thank you?!” Despite being covered in mud, your breath smells wonderful! But she does have a point, and I do kinda feel bad.

“Alright, fine! I’m sorry I hurt you,” there, that should make her feel bett-

“You didn’t hurt me!” Oh come on! “I- I was just surprised!” Yeah, sure.

“Well, I figured you’d be fine, with that thick skull of yours.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?!” Oh Scootaloo, you’re way too easy to tease! “I don’t have to take this from you, I’m leaving!” Wait, that wasn’t part of the plan!

“Hey, wait I said I was sorry!” She’s still walking away, how dare she ignore me?! “I’ll buy you lunch!” Of course, that ought to win over that dull pegasus.

“I don’t want your lunch!” she yells back at me, attempting to get her scooter out of the mud. Oh, great job Diamond Tiara, you ruined your chance to get with Scootaloo. Jeez, there has to be a way to get her to spend time with me!

>Force her to go out with you.

>Beg her.

>Stroke her ego.

Forcing her won’t work, she has a pretty strong will. And though I hate to admit it, I doubt I could physically force her to come with me.

As for begging...no. Just no. Only the weak beg, and if there is one thing I’m not, it’s weak.

>Stroke her ego.

“Why are you even here in the first place?” Scootaloo turns around and asks me as she gets on her now free scooter. Heh, perfect. I sigh and turn away, scratching at the dirt with my hoof.

“Promise not to laugh?” I ask her, in order for this to work just right, I need to play the part. Scootaloo just tilts her head, no doubt confused. What can I say? I am an excellent actor!

“Uh, sure?” Hook. Line. Sinker.

“I… I just wanted the chance to catch your smooth moves.”

“W-what?!” Scootaloo yelps out as she just stares at me with wide eyes.

“I mean, you’re just soooo amazing on that scooter of yours!” I walk up to her and wrap a hoof around her shoulder, causing her to blush, “and you look so amazing when you leap over ponies, carts, and everything else!” I give her a gentle hug, causing her to giggle.

“Aw, come on! I’m not that great, Rainbow Dash is way cooler.” Whatever you say, I know you’re enjoying the praise.

“Yeah, Rainbow Dash is pretty cool.” Isn’t that the really obnoxious mare that doesn’t know how to take a shower? “But in my eyes,” I turn her head towards me, staring directly into her beautiful purple eyes, “you’re totally radical.” And that my friends, seals the deal.

“Radical?! Me?!” Scootaloo’s blushing like mad right now! I love making her blush! “W-well if that’s how you feel…” Scootaloo begins as she wraps her tiny wing around my body...wow I can barely feel it. “I guess I can forgive you.”

“Great!” now for step two, “but I still feel just awful about hitting you with a rock. Let me make it up to you with lunch, my treat!” I can see her debating with herself, but with the look of her eyes I already know her answer.

“Well, I am pretty hungry, sure!” she says as she starts walking away.

“Uh, where are you going?”

“Oh, I left my wagon by the bench, give me a sec and I’ll attach it to my scooter.” Ooh, she’s going to drive me to lunch? Now that is what I call a gentle...mare? Ugh, I’m not even going to try to figure out what to call her.


“And then Spitfire did this totally awesome spiny move, and it was so awesome! And she was all like, “oh, it’s no big deal,” but it totally was!”

“Uh huh, great,” I reply, taking another bite out of my strawberry salad. Ever since I bought her food, Scootaloo’s been talking nonstop about the Wonderbolts, it’s starting to get annoying.

“And den, Shpitfire did dis awesome-” QUIT TALKING WITH YOUR MOUTH FULL, IT’S DISGUSTING! “...Heh, sorry,” she says after swallowing her food. Must have seen the glare on my face. Or she can read minds, really hope it’s the former.

“No, it’s alright,” I say, trying to be as sweet as possible, “please, go on.” I say with a twirl of my hoof.

“Oh, well, like I was saying…” Um, yeah, go on. After a few seconds she starts chuckling, rubbing the back of her neck with her hoof, “...Uh, I kinda forgot what I was talking about.” Oh come on! Even you can’t be that simple minded!

“You were talking about the Wonderbolts, remember?” Ugh, what a dodo brain.

“Oh yeah, sorry, I forgot.” Yeah, I kinda figured. “But man, what I wouldn’t do to go to a Wonderbolts show! It’d be the second greatest thing ever!” Wait, second?

“Well, what’s the first greatest thing ever then?” I ask, causing Scootaloo to scoff.

“Uh, seeing Rainbow Dash become a Wonderbolt of course!” Scootaloo, I’m going to be honest, this obsession of yours, not healthy. At all.

“So, I’m guessing the only times you saw them was on Television?”

“Yeah, which really sucks!” she takes a big gulp of her soda, and sighs, “man, what I wouldn’t give to go to a live show, it would be amazing!” Wow, she looks totally spaced out right now. I wonder if I she’d notice if I try to draw on her face? She’d look fantastic with a fake moustache!

>Draw a fake moustache on her while she’s distracted

>Quietly pay for the bill and leave

>Invite her to go to the Wonderbolts show.

Well, leaving her like this wouldn’t be much fun, especially if I pay the bill. I mean, I could leave without paying the bill, and have her hoof over the bits, but I doubt she has enough bits to pay for her own food, let alone both our meals. Besides, I already said I would pay for her meal, and Diamond Dazzle Tiara does not break her word...most of the time.

As for the Wonderbolt’s show, puh-lease! I’m pretty sure those shows are exclusive to Cloudsdale, and there is no way I’m plummeting to my death for her sake. So, that means there is only one thing left to do.

>Draw a fake moustache on her while she’s distracted

Luckily I always bring with me a permanent marker in my purse, just for this kind of occasion. Most ponies would be surprised how often I get the chance to draw moustaches on other pony’s faces. I even got Miss Cheerilee once! Let’s see…a loop there and a loop...THERE! Perfect, she looks just like one of those cliche villains on television!

“Hey Scoots, you done daydreaming?” I ask after putting away my marker.

“Huh, what?” Oh Scootaloo, you poor, simple minded foal. “Oh yeah, sorry,” she shrugs off with a laugh.

“Well, it’s been fun Scootaloo, but I gotta get going,” I tell her as I lay the bits on the table, and begin to leave.

“Yeah, you know, you’re actually pretty cool Diamond Tiara.” Well duh! I can’t believe it took you this long to figure that out.


“Daddy, I’m home!” I call out. Well, I didn’t hear any reply, so I guess he’s still at work. Oh well, I’ll just watch a little bit of television. With that in mind, I sit down on the couch and turn on our television. I do a little bit of channel surfing, doesn’t look like anything interesting is on. Grr, come on! This is why I use the internet! There is always something on the internet, that’s why it’s the internet! Whatever, I’ll just- hello? What’s this? It looks like a Wonderbolts commercial.

Honestly, it looks so boring, who would want to watch a bunch of lame...pegasus’s? Pegasasses? Pega...WHATEVER THE PLURAL IS! It’s still totally boring!

...Still, Scootaloo looked like she really wanted to go. I guess I could buy her a ticket, but then I wouldn’t get to go with her. And how could I deprive her the honor of escorting me to a Wonderbolts show? Yes, I can be a bit mean sometimes but I’m not a monster!

With a one day showing in Ponyville! Wait, what? There’s going to be a showing in Ponyville? Why? Huh, apparently it’s something to honor the “Elements of Harmony”. Hmm, looks like it’s going to be a month from now, I’m guessing so they can be build a small stadium, or something. I wonder if Mr. McIntosh will help build the stadium? With how big and strong he is he could probably do it by himself… whatever. Time to go play my game!

>Don’t buy two tickets for the Wonderbolts show.

>Make Scootaloo lunch for tomorrow.

>Buy two tickets for the Wonderbolts show!

...Oh yeah! I forgot Scootaloo likes the Wonderbolts so much. Still, those tickets are expensive. If I bought two tickets than I’d only be able to buy 3 brand new games this week, and that would suck! It would be just be cheaper to make her lunch instead, even though I’m not much of a cook. If I make her a salad with a juice box, that should be good...right?

Hmm, or I could just go to bed, I am sleepy...jeez, what to do?

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