• Published 28th May 2013
  • 6,543 Views, 47 Comments

Crimson Cough - Mudraynebow



The start of the virus was unknown, but it started and spread through Equestria like wildfire, killing countless thousands of ponies. Hardly any are still alive, and the ones that are struggle to survive. The Mane Six are a few of the survivors, and

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Crimson Cough

WARNING: The following story has been rated Teen by the author, due to disturbing descriptions of sickness and gory symptoms, and descriptions of suffering and death. Some descriptions may be disturbing to some readers, and this story is only recommended for older teens.


INTRO

Beginning of Day 1
Number of Infected: 402
Deaths: 15
Virus origin: Unknown
Status: In Control


Scootaloo shot down the street of Ponyville that morning on her scooter as fast as she could, scaring the heck out of unsuspecting passing ponies and avoiding obstacles at breakneck speed. Scootaloo laughed. She loved doing this in the morning. Maybe, she hoped, Rainbow Dash was in Ponyville to check out her awesome moves. She wanted to be cool like Rainbow Dash. She wanted to put on an awesome show, to give the ponies something they would never forget. But what Scootaloo didn't know was that she would definitely give the ponies something this morning, and it wasn't a show.

After about five minutes, Scootaloo stopped outside of Sugarcube Corner because she felt out of breath for some reason. She got off her scooter and coughed a little. Her throat hurt slightly. She hoped she wasn't coming down with a cold or else she wouldn't be able to practice her moves for Rainbow Dash.

Scootaloo decided to get a treat from Sugarcube Corner to help her feel better. As she walked through the door, she passed her teacher, Miss Cheerilee, who smiled at Scootaloo when she passed. Scootaloo smiled back.
Although she didn't know it, Scootaloo had just killed Cheerilee. Within three days, Cheerilee would be dead after she, too, killed a lot of other ponies, quite by accident.

Mrs. Cake, smiling, gave Scootaloo a cupcake when she walked in. Scootaloo gave Mrs. Cake something in return without even realizing it. Mrs. Cake wouldn't last as long as Cheerilee. She would be dead before the day was over. But for now, Mrs. Cake- quite by accident- would help kill dozens of other ponies.

Throughout the rest of the day, Scootaloo infected other ponies, who infected even more ponies. Scootaloo went back home at the end of the day, feeling exhausted for no reason. Her throat hurt a considerable amount worse and she began coughing more. Still thinking nothing of it, that she just had a little sore throat, Scootaloo went to bed.

Beginning of Day 2
Number of Infected: 1,004
Deaths: 356
Virus origin: Unknown
Status: Yellow Alert


Scootaloo had thought she would be better in the morning, but she had been wrong. Instead, she actually felt about three times worse than yesterday. She went outside and began coughing. She coughed and coughed and just when she didn't think she would be able to take it anymore, a fine red mist sprayed from her mouth and onto the ground at her feet. Red liquid trickled down from her mouth. In horror, realizing she was seriously sick, Scootaloo took off towards the doctor.

When Scootaloo reached the doctor, she had to wait two hours to be admitted inside because there was a lot of other ponies, waiting, and most of them seemed to have the same problem as Scootaloo.

The waiting room was a nightmare. At least fifty ponies were in there, and nurses ran around in a hurry, doing their best to clean up the blood and snot that other ponies had coughed up onto the walls and floor.

Nopony knew it yet, but everyone in the hospital would soon be dead.

Scootaloo got back home that evening with a bottle of pills that the doctor had given her. After a few more coughs which sprayed blood and mucus on the floor, Scootaloo took a pill and headed to bed, still coughing.

Beginning of Day 3
Number of Infected: 7,593
Deaths: 2,261
Virus origin: Unknown
Status: Red Alert


Scootaloo didn't wake up the next morning. She would never wake again. Her body lay in bed, covered with blood that she had coughed up while she had been sleeping. There was also bits of her own throat that she had coughed up around her mouth.
Every second, however, more ponies became infected by other ponies. All over Equestria, the sickness had spread all over Equestria. Not even Celestia herself could stop it now. It had spread too fast, too far, and it was too late. Then, Celestia got sick, and nothing could save her.

Beginning of Day 4
Number of Infected: 14,027
Deaths: 6,442
Virus origin: Unknown
Status: Red Alert

Beginning of Day 5
Number of Infected: 19,257
Deaths: 11,874
Virus origin: Unknown
Status: Red Alert

Beginning of Day 6
Number of Infected: 23,564
Deaths: 15,995
Virus origin: Unknown
Status: Red Alert

Beginning of Day 7
Number of Infected: 25,360
Deaths: 19,845
Virus origin: Unknown
Status: Too Late


***


TWO WEEKS AFTER DAY 1. SITUATION: DESPERATE. LOCATION: TWILIGHT SPARKLE'S LIBRARY.

The six friends sat in the main room of Twilight's library. Over in the corner, Rainbow Dash sat next to Fluttershy and Rarity. They were the only comforts in this world so cold right now. Outside, the rain poured down, the wind blew, and thunder boomed in the distance, which only added to the gloomy mood.

Twilight sat near Applejack and Pinkie Pie while reading a book. That was all she seemed to do now, because there was nothing else to do. Pinkie Pie laid down on the floor, and wondered if there would ever be any happiness ever again in this world. She promised that if and when the pandemic was over, she would throw the biggest party ever. Applejack just sat in silence, her face tear-stained from crying over the rest of her family who were all undoubtedly dead now.

The six had been stuck in Twilight's library almost a week now. Because of the disease, it wasn't safe to go outside. They couldn't even go out to use the bathroom that Twilight had out in the back yard of the library. The only thing they had was a bucket. Because of this, the whole room stank of urine and the bitter smell of sweat.

As Twilight read her book, a single tear fell from one of her eyes. She still couldn't believe something like this had happened, and completely messed up the whole world, but the reason she was crying was because of Spike. Her Number One Assistant had gone out twelve days ago to see the doctor because he had been coughing, and he had never returned. Twilight knew he was dead.

Nopony had spoken a word all morning but Pinkie Pie finally broke the silence.

"Um... guys... when this is all over, can we have a party?"

Twilight looked at Pinkie and smiled weakly. "We'll have the biggest party ever."

"Equestria ain't never gonna be the same again if we ever get outa this," Applejack said with her head down. "There's so many ponies out there dead or dying."

"From the things I heard before it got really bad, not even Princess Celestia was able to do anything to stop it. It was beyond even her control," Twilight said.

Lightning suddenly flashed brightly followed instantly by a loud blast of thunder, causing all of them to jump.

"I bet I could go outside and stop that storm," Rainbow Dash said.

"No!" Twilight said. "Don't you know how dangerous it is out there?"

"Please don't go outside, Rainbow," Fluttershy said quietly. "You'll die."

Somepony suddenly sneezed.

They all looked up quickly in horror.

"Who was that?" Twilight asked. "Tell me who that was!"

None of her friends answered her. They all just looked around in terror. Which one of them had just sneezed?

"Please," Twilight said with tears in her eyes. "We're all friends here. I... I can't believe I'm saying this, but it's either one pony or all of us. If... If you're truly our friend, the pony that sneezed, please just tell us."

Nopony moved for a moment. Then Rarity, with tears in her eyes, stood up.

"It was me," she said, crying. "I was the one who sneezed."

Twilight looked at Rarity in horror, desperately hoping that Rarity was just playing a sick joke, but she saw the blood dribbling down the unicorn's chin from her mouth, and Twilight realized that Rarity was serious- this was no joke. The rest of the ponies backed away from the sobbing unicorn, terrified.

"K- kill me, Twilight," Rarity said, crying harder than ever. "Just please do it quickly."

"What?" Twilight said. "Rarity, no!"

"Remember me always," Rarity said quietly, then coughed, causing blood to spray from her nose and mouth. "Do it, Twilight. Kill me to save the rest of you!"

Trembling, Twilight pointed her horn at Rarity and closed her eyes. Her horn glowed purple, and a second later, there was a loud BANG and a sizzling, blinding flash of energy. Rarity was blasted across the room but she was dead before she even slammed into a bookshelf with bone-breaking force.

Twilight lowered her head and began crying, along with the rest of her remaining friends. Rarity was dead. They all knew it, but couldn't accept it.

Unable to accept what she had just done, Twilight, still crying, ran to the bucket of waste in the other room of the library. She made it just in time, and all the food that came back up from her stomach landed in the bucket. She wiped the remaining puke off her lips in disgust and returned to the other room where her friends were still crying over what had just happened.

Somepony suddenly stopped crying and sneezed. This was followed by the sound of blood splattering to the floor. Twilight looked up in horror but this time, she didn't have to ask who had sneezed. Fluttershy was crying harder than ever, and it wasn't because of Rarity. She stood up and went in front of Twilight to die, and she sneezed again. Blood sprayed from her mouth in a violent spray and dripped down her chin.

"P- please make it quick, Twilight," Fluttershy said, crying hard now.

Twilight shook her head in silent horror. She had already killed one of her friends, she couldn't possibly kill another.

"It's ok, Twi," a voice said. "I- I- I'll do it."

Twilight looked as Rainbow Dash stood up. The pegasus looked sick from what she had just said and she was shaking violently. Before Twilight could respond, Rainbow Dash walked through the doorway to where the kitchen was and returned a minute later, holding a sharp knife. If Rainbow Dash had looked sick before, that was nothing to how she looked now. She was, after all, about to kill one of her best friends.

Rainbow walked around around to Fluttershy's side, careful not to stand right in front of her in case she sneezed again.

"I'm so, so sorry, Fluttershy," Rainbow Dash said, crying. "You- you're my best friend."

"You're my best friend, too, Rainbow," Fluttershy said, tears slipping down her face, mixing with the blood around her mouth. "Before I die, I just wanted to say thank you for the time you stood up for me in Cloudsdale. If it wasn't for you, I never would have found my true self."

Rainbow smiled sadly, crying, if possible, even harder. She wanted to drop the knife, to let her friend live, but she knew that letting her die by this horrible sickness would be crueler than ending it quickly.

"You're welcome, Fluttershy. I just want you to know also, I'll never forget you."

Fluttershy smiled, then closed her eyes. Rainbow Dash, against every instinct in her body, raised the knife.

"Will it hurt?" Fluttershy asked quietly.

Rainbow didn't answer for a moment.

"Only for a second," she finally said, her face now soaked with tears.

"Thank you," Fluttershy said, her eyes still closed. "Do it now, and don't ever forget me, Rainbow."

Rainbow Dash, with a loud scream of determination and horror and sadness, swung the knife downward. She buried it up to the handle in the back of Fluttershy's neck where the spinal cord was, trying to spare the yellow pegasus some agony, then quickly took her hoof away to avoid the spray of blood.

Fluttershy didn't scream. Her body simply went completely rigid and she fell on her side. She died with her eyes closed and the grateful smile of thanks to Rainbow Dash still on her face.

This time, it was Rainbow Dash's turn to throw up. She made it to the bucket just in time and she returned to her four remaining friends a minute later. She didn't look at Rarity or Fluttershy, it was too painful. But she still cried. She cried harder then she ever had before in her life.

Even Pinkie Pie, who almost always seemed to be in a good mood, was crying her eyes out. Her normally poofy hair had deflated, making it look sad and limp. Twilight sobbed onto a book she was holding. Tears were coming down Applejack's face.
They all cried over Rarity, Fluttershy, for the entire land of Equestria, but mostly for their two dead, dear friends. Neither Twilight, Rainbow, Pinkie, or Applejack thought they would ever be able to stop crying.

And just when nopony thought things could get any worse, things did.

Somepony sneezed.

Author's Note:

This story is based off of two other fanfics I read, "The Cough" and "Flu Season". It's also based off a book I read by Stephen King called "The Stand" and another book by Richard Preston, "The Hot Zone".
I hope you all enjoyed this story, I had the idea for awhile but what really got me motivated to write it was when I recently read "The Hot Zone" again and then, reading "The Stand", and putting together a fanfic that two other fanfics inspired me to write, I came out with this story. Hope you all enjoyed!

Comments ( 47 )

This does sound like the cough.......:pinkiehappy::pinkiecrazy:......but BETTER!

:pinkiesick:
That was TOO DETAILED
I'll like it but not fave, I don't think I can take any more when my throught was in nots by the end of the first paragraph.:pinkiesick:

That cover pic...


... I like it :pinkiecrazy:

These guys have somewhat annoyingly poor habits for staying safe, and maintaining a quarantine, especially considering the circumstances.

Comment posted by Mudraynebow deleted Sep 1st, 2013

2644619

1. Yes, I'm aware of that, It's kinda a main focus for these sort of stories, I'm not referring to that, I'm referring to the main cast in Twilight's treehouse.

2. Again, not referring to that, you established a reason, i.e. it was unexpected, quick, and lethal. I'm referring to the unexplained logic gaps, namely the survivors not seeming to of learned to be cautious.

3. Indeed, and managing your audiences willing suspense of disbelief is generally a rather universally accepted point of necessity for effective storytelling. Though, of course, I'm not talking about you the author, I'm talking specifically about the six survivors being rather innocent. There's logical reasons for that of course, even if they aren't covered within the narrative, but I'm not posting a full story critique, I'm posting an observation I made as a casual reader. Bit of a difference.

I think AJ sneezed.

This has really good potential, you just skip through it too quickly. Maybe you should add more detail and really go into depth on each day, otherwise great job so far!:pinkiehappy:

Why are there so many dislikes?

2650202
Ah! You read this story as well? :pinkiehappy:

2650208 Yup. Pretty damn good, if you ask me. I don't know why, but I really like disease stories, and it popped up in the group Diseases, Plagues, and Illnesses so I just said why not.

2644619 I Think Its the spanish flu

Achoo! ... O.o ...

The beginning, I could see the adaption of The Hot Zone. Pretty good. The beginning of the tree house scene, with them all crammed in with the bucket, worked, too.
When everyone in the treehouse starts sneezing, though, it got kind of silly. I wasn't particularly fond of "The Cough," but one thing it did right was the ambiguity of the line, "someone coughed." It wasn't clear if the disease had spread, or if Fluttershy was lying when she said it was her, or what.
I think you have the makings of something here, but then kind of blitzed through in madcap manner.

:fluttershysad: Sniff, sniff :fluttercry: *tears well up inside eyes*

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! POOR SCOOTALOO WAAAAAAH!!!!!! POOR SCOOTALOO! *OC is infected and dies in sleep and wakes up in heaven with princesses who can't die because are goddesses and can recreate world.* now in oc's POV. *Sees cutest wittle filly* :scootangel: DAAAAAAAAW!! *Cuddles up to Scootaloo in heaven*

DAMN! That was good!
Needs a sequel, where they find out the culprit!

Good golly, I can't even...:fluttercry:

I really hate how you killed off Fluttershy, but it was a great story. Good job.

*sneeze*

"WHO THE FUCK IS THAT?!" :pinkiegasp:

"well fuck." :eeyup:

Hey, [Content Deleted] It's Carly! I read the story like I told you I would! I actually thought to was a great story! I was into it, you really do have a talent for writing. Anyways, I'll see you tomorrow! Bye. :twilightsheepish:

the intro reminded me of the flash game pandemic. you make a virus and infect and kill everyone. ever played it?

3522877
I haven't played it, I'll have to check it out sometime

the cough...omg i remember that fic...i hate cliffhangers. i was depressed for weeks :fluttercry:

3800264
This story is strongly based off "The Cough". :moustache:

3800300 so it has the same damn cliffhanger ending?! dammit i hate cliffhanger endings >_>

love the use of the pic.

goodby world *sad face*

4667882
So, you read this, eh?:trixieshiftright:

Hey guys should I make my own alternative ending for this fanfiction? If I did it would be my first fanfiction. I don't know if anyone will read this since it's been almost a year but one person is all it takes

4749836
If you want to, that's fine with me.

I was always a fan if dark stories regarding diseases. I must say, this story didn't disappoint! :heart::twilightsmile:

2644678 In retrospect the moment Rarity sneezed they were all dead, although I must agree the way that they handled the whole quarantine situation was appalling.

Too bad you weren't inspired by the movie Outbreak or Contagion. Then this story may have ended differently.

I nearly had to skip past the Scootaloo intro :raritydespair:
Once I got past that, though, it was fine :pinkiecrazy:

Probably Rainbow Dash, since she kept talking to Fluttershy. :applecry:

Oh:pinkiesick: So much gore! But I love it!

Really? That was almost mature? I've seen way more gory stories that are rated teen...

Anyway, great job!:pinkiehappy:

All of them.....DEAD! If Rarity had it, Fluttershy and Rainbow obviously had it and since they were all in the same room......ALL OF THEM ARE DEAD!!!! This is kinda like the Black Plague, but more deadly and less symptoms. If this ever becomes reality.......it’s gonna suck.

How'd the virus kill Spike? Zoonotic pandemics don't usually end up this deadly for multiple species at once. Is there some shared magical organ that ponies and dragons share in Equestria? If the virus disrupts that, perhaps that's where the shared leathality arises.

Unable to accept what she had just done, Twilight, still crying, ran to the bucket of waste in the other room of the library. She made it just in time, and all the food that came back up from her stomach landed in the bucket. She wiped the remaining puke off her lips in disgust and returned to the other room where her friends were still crying over what had just happened.

Horses don't throw up either. The reasons they can't are related to their physiology and anatomy as well. First, the esophageal sphincter is much stronger in horses than in most other animals, making it difficult for it to open under backward pressure from the stomach, according to Equus magazine.
Muh Immersion man, muh immersion

Rainbow Dash, with a loud scream of determination and horror and sadness, swung the knife downward. She buried it up to the handle in the back of Fluttershy's neck where the spinal cord was, trying to spare the yellow pegasus some agony, then quickly took her hoof away to avoid the spray of blood. Fluttershy didn't scream. Her body simply went completely rigid and she fell on her side. She died with her eyes closed and the grateful smile of thanks to Rainbow Dash still on her face.

10845153
They CAN throw up, MLP and real life ponies are not the same, you can see it for yourself in a episode from the season 1 (Applebuck Season) where Applejack prepares cupcakes being sleepy.

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