The Matter at Hoof
I do not own My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Twilight was once again leaning over a book of hers after the rather nice dinner made for her by Spike and Masquerade. Spike was currently upstairs sleeping away from the nicely made dinner, gems and dissert. As for Masquerade, one small peek behind her shoulder would show him leaning over his map again, but for some other reason. On his own perch sat Owlowiscious, who was gazing over the two while preening his wings.
This Stallion she once knew and called a great friend back then has just pulled the mother of all whammies on her when it came to knowing him. What started out as a concern for his feelings just a week or so prior, has just reviled a completely different race. One that could become anypony they saw fit.
The vary idea sent shivers up and down her spine, knowing that somepony she knew was actually one of those insect like ponies that called themselves changelings. It probably wasn’t right for her to be scared of something she didn’t know, but just knowing of that one ability to become another and not see any differences?
Forestalling anymore of these thoughts, she refocused on the book in front of her and read on. It was one of her many books on known Eqestrian History. Particularly on discovery of other races such as the battle strong griffins who made their homes in the high mountain peeks. Or the powerful minotaur’s that had made their very kingdom on iron and earth. Even some information could be found on the diamond dogs and how they still proffered to live in tribal packs under the hooves of all species alike.
But what of these shape sifting changelings that supposedly used emotion of others to live and could put on a masque to fool those around themselves?
Irritation bubbled slowly up as she flipped more and more through the pages of the book, still finding nothing on Masquerade’s race. No names, no locations, origins or anything for that matter. It was like they never existed!
How hard could it be to find one single race that has such a unique set of abilities and not be noticed! She raged on the inside while switching from the book she had to the next, and tossed the other into a ever growing pile with a *thump*.
Looking up at the noise and then the mare responsible, Masquerade sighed quietly and got up. Moving to her as if he were a phantom, he peered over her hunched shoulder and tried to read what she was flipping through. He could pick up the bitter taste of anger coming off her from her lack of finding anything. And the only thing she would fuss over would be what she had just found out about. changelings.
“Why can't I find anything on them?” Twilight whispered quietly, hoping not to alert the fake unicorn in the room, “There is no way no pony knows about them?” And rubbing her chin.
“Unless they don’t what to be known.” Twilight yelped and fell back as Masquerade sidestepped her and caught her with his magic. Looking up and seeing his amused grin, she slightly blushed knowing that he was most likely behind her for some time.
Trying to play her flustered face as anger she tried to growl out, “When will you ever stop doing that?” To which he shook his head saying, “And miss your adorable blush?” Making her blush even further, “Why, that would be torture.” And gently set her back on her hooves.
Huffing to herself and thinking on it, she asked, “Why do you like embarrassing me so much?” For a moment he seemed to almost stiffen up at the question but just as quickly relaxed. Seeing him go from teasing to calm he told, “Well…as I told you from before, changelings feed off emotion, so it’s a necessity.” And sat down in front of her. Though, it seemed like he was possibly hiding something.
“And, as you should really know by now with all these books.” He gestured about with his hoof, “Emotions come in a very wide variety, but with some being the base to them all.” When his eyes came back to her, the disguised changeling saw Twilight with quill and scroll at the ready.
Getting a ghost of a smile at this familiar action, he continued, “The most pivoted of these emotions is Love, and is most sought after by all Changelings, as it strengthens and feeds use greatly.”
Writing this down, she held up her quill and asked, “So, love is your most basic food source that is required to live for all changelings?” And thinking of the implications of a race living in this manner, asking, “Does that mean your self sustaining if you have a number of changelings giving off love?”
Masquerade smiled at that, wishing it was truly that simple, “If only Twinkles Sprinkles, if only.” Seeing her pout from his slight teasing and getting another tart taste of embarrassment that he loved to take in, “No, we changelings can intake emotions, but not off another changeling unless forcibly.” Seeing her inquiring gaze he explained, “A changeling can sacrifice very small bit of their magic to drain other things of their emotions.”
But quickly added, “Though the practice is considered barbaric for us, as it more or less kills the target in a sense, becoming somewhat like mindless zombies.” While adding in thought, Much like using that mind control spell, Blinding Love, but she doesn’t need to know that yet.
“Like how some fungi can live off other living things like plants, but doing so might kill the plant?” Twilight questioned while continuing to put down all her findings. Not two minutes into this conversation and she was getting more information from Masquerade then from her books.
“Yes, just like that. We can willingly share emotion with others, but some prefer more than just sweet tasting love.” As she stopped to hear him fully, he tapped his chest saying, “The reason--” Or part of it anyways, “--That I like teasing you is because I can glen some of your embarrassed or flustered emotions, both being sweet or tart.”
Realization came over the lavender mare as she directed an angry glare at the stallion, “You mean to tell me that all those times you have embarrassed me, was so you could have a quick snack?”
Refusing to fidget in his place at her intense glare he asked, “Would it help that you help stave off my hunger and therefore didn’t need to go looking for sompony to sap of their emotions?” Her glare lessened some as he continued with, “And do keep in mind, I had some decency to do it when we were more or less alone.”
She nodded at that and found his reasoning to be sound. If she was in the same position, she would want to do so without giving anypony a reason to panic. “I‘ll accept that.” She said before glaring at him, “But don’t think for a second I am okay with you embarrassing me at every turn just so you can have a snack!”
Holding up his hooves, he told, “I don’t take it lightly Twilight, Emotions have all sorts of effects on changelings!” Seeing her interest peek and feel her irritation lower, he said, “Another reason love is so coveted by my kind is because it has no real draw backs if steadily feed on.”
“So, each emotion gives a different effect, depending how much you take of it?” She asked with a tilt of her head, wondering what side effects he gets from feeding on her flustered times.
With a nod he said, “That’s right, it‘s like that griffin saying, you are what you eat. If a changeling feed on very mellow and calm emotions, they tend to have more control over their magic, with too much making them somewhat lazy or even blissful.” Gesturing to her pile of book he told, “Anger, irritation, rage, these emotions are seen as savage food by us, as it can make them effective battle harden troops, but at the coast of self control.” Thinking in his head he said, “I remember actually seeing a changeling feed on too much of it. Completely lost his mind and become like some sort of animal, shape shifted into the likes of one too, by pure instinct.”
Seeing her worried look he assured her, “Don’t worry, embarrassment allows a changeling to use a more unique magic that can disrupt magic in general. But too much feeding on it can make a changeling extremely shy and even reluctant to do things, so very few feed on it.”
She looked at him for a moment and asked, “Was that why you were so shy back then, an overdose of my embarrassment?”
With a nod he replied, “Yes, it was part of the reason, gleaning love isn’t easy you see, so I had to make do with that.” Smirking he said, “And I must confess, you got me hooked on the stuff.”
Huffing a little at his choice of words and looking away, she grumbled, “I still don’t like the idea that you have to embarrass me to get your little snack.” While he chuckled at that Twilight once again asked, “What do other emotions do to your kind?”
Masquerade smiled again, liking how well this was going. He half expected her to worry to some level at telling her how they fed for survival “Well, next are the boosting feelings of ones confidants and ego that boost the magic output greatly, at the cost of some control. With too much making them headstrong and egotistical at times.”
“Then there are lower feelings of sadness or pain that have this bitter or salty taste and gives a changeling the ability to absorb emotions and magic more effectively. But this is a double edge sword, the more you take, the stronger the absorption, as well as the depression one gets in. Sadly, suicide has been reported from those who take way too much of this stuff, so not many try to take it. But it has this strange addicting effect, so it‘s still used, while also useful.” He further told while looking down some.
“That sounds awful, how could anypony do that to themselves?” Twilight couldn’t think of a reason for anypony to actually eat something that would cause such adverse effects. The idea of one of her friends getting in such a situation did leave a bitter feeling in her own heart.
Sensing the change Masquerade shrugged, “It‘s part of our living. Sometimes we need to actually take it so we might survive something else.” Looking to her he told, “You don’t have to like it Twilight, but I implore you to accept the fact we changelings have had to do a number of things to survive.”
Waving a foreleg to her pile of books he told, “Part of the reason you can't find us in book, is because we make sure no one releases any with such information.”
He left that hanging as Twilights mind began to think of how that could be done before coming to a conclusion, “You can turn into other ponies and can take on high standing rolls.” Looking to her pile then at the fake unicorn she said with more understanding, “You need to take on our appearance because you also need food, which only ponies, griffon’s, minotaur’s and even diamond dogs give.”
Just looking past him and to his work spot where his map laid open, she eye grew wider and stated, “Or hide in plane sight while waiting for somepony to pass by.” And slowly focused back to the black Unicorn, “Is that why you never considered taking the train, you were sacred of being seen by this Libel?”
“Not Libel himself.” Masquerade shook his head, “Just all the scouts or informants he, or any other clan may have.” Giving her a serious look he said, “As I said, heirs are a big deal in the five clans. We are stronger, faster and even somewhat more smarter then most changelings. Only two heirs can make another heir, leaving us as the most rarest.”
Things lulled into a calm as the two sat in their place while Twilight thought over the new information that was in her mind and on her scroll. At first she was doing this endeavor to see what they were more like, but quickly found herself in more fascination and curious of what they were.
Hearing a series of pops come from Masquerade as he stretch, he yawned, “Night Twinkles, I‘m going to sleep. See you in the morning.” And walked off to his work place where he pulled a few pillows into a pile of his own and went quickly to sleep. She soon turned back to her notes and looked over them while replying Masquerade words again and again.
What did this all mean really, when all information is once gathered and looked over? What will it really mean for her, her friends, her teacher and all of Equestria in general? She hasn’t forgotten their talk earlier that day and how he reviled himself to her. There was so much more he was hiding, and she was sure that he was more then aware that she was aware of it.
Sighing and getting up, she was about to head up to her room before stopping and looking to that stallion who looked and even acted the part of a pony. She still didn’t want to trust him after finding out what he was, or what it meant.
But she also couldn’t bring herself to hate him for something he was raised to also do, and then forsake so she might know and put himself into more danger with his kin.
Looking to a closet, she quietly opened it with her magic and pulled out a blanket, carefully setting on the sleeping black form before heading up stairs. Unbeknownst to her, he cuddled the blanket and sighed in comfort, getting a slight taste of some very sweet emotion from her magic.
The next morning, Spike made his way down the stares and into the main living space that was the library itself, rubbing his eyes of any sleep he could. Sleepily making it into the kitchen and fetching a bowl with more oat for that morning, he walked back out and started to set the table for him self. Stopping in his tracks, he turned around to a rather large pile of books just sitting their and mocking him.
He stood there and sleepily glared back before waving a arm tiredly thinking, breakfast now, evil book pile later. This was all watched by an ever observant Owl on his perch before taking wing and flew after the dragon while casting its gaze over the strange black pony who still slept.
It wasn’t long that Twilight came down the stairs herself and passed up the pile of book to get her own meal, all the while going over a list of that days work load.
It wasn’t long after Twilight pass his spot that Masquerade woke up, looking around a little confused as the blanket was draped over his head. Magicing it off and letting off a yawn while looking it over, he shrugged and folded it and set it down.
Going to the kitchen, he found all inhabitants of the living house-tree inside. Spike was rummaging for milk. That feathery pet of Twilights over the fridge to watch what the dragon was up to. And a lavender Mare getting some water boiling for some morning tea.
Walking past them and gathering what emotions he could from them without it having any negative results later, he grabbed an apple, about face and left with a cherry, “Morning!”
Spike soon fallowed shortly with the milk and began to poor himself some with the oat cereal he had. Owlowiscious just flew from the fridge to Twilight's back to watch what she was doing.
Craning her neck to look at her feathery friend, she greeted, “Hello Owlowiscious, how‘s your morning been?” And got a simple, “Who.” In response. Turning back to the kettle that was not whistling, she pulled it back and set a tea bag inside, calling up a few cup from the cabinets.
Once again she looked over her list of the day, seeing a spot that told her today was a gathering with her friends at Sugar Cube Corner. Both her brows furrowed at that and thought with concern, should I tell them of this? Passing through the kitchen threshold and looking at Masquerade for a moment. Would he do anything if I did tell my friends?
As soon as her worry bubbled up, Masquerade looked up from his work spot with that apple orbiting his head, giving a smile and wave to her before going back to work. She smiled and waved back before he did continue on with his work still thinking, I don’t want to put them in danger, but I also don’t know what to do!
It was an uncomfortable feeling for her to not know what to do. Masquerade gave her two dissensions she could act by, and both didn’t feel right to her. So far the one with her giving him a chance was going smoothly at the moment, but she would feel more better knowing her friends knew of what was going on. At least Applejack could help see any of his lies.
When she put the tea and cups down, she paused and thought that over for a moment remembering when she visited them a few days back with their trade agreement with the Gem Clan. A Clan of changelings that act as nomadic ponies and apparently have strong ties to the Apple Clan for who knows how long. They more or less, know how to fool the Element of Honesty in a way to not be suspicious in the least, and that concerned her even more.
Sending a glance to Masquerade, she could only confirm to herself that no pony would know the difference if a changeling were to ever take another ponies form. If the Applejack, an element of Honesty to its finest, couldn’t see past the ruse they put up, how would any other pony?
Pouring herself and Mask some tea, she levitated them both with her as she walked over to him, thinking over what she came up with. Looking back at Spike who was now putting his bowl up, she whispered to her owl that was still perched on her back, “Promise to keep this a secret?” And gestured with her head to Masquerade.
The Owl only tilted his head and flew off to his perch to leave Twilight to her talk. After all, the only others that would even listen to him would be Spike, who barely understood him, the other pets, and Fluttershy.
Nodding to Owlowiscious and walking to the working unicorn that was hunched over like she had seen him as a colt when studying, she placed one of the cups of tea before his face. Drawing away from his work some to see the offending object that disturbed him, he glanced up to find Twilight standing slightly awkwardly before him.
He was aware she was unsure of something, mostly concerning him again, but waited for her to speak and know what she was wanting to get to. He thankfully didn’t need to wait long as she said, “I‘m going to meet some friends today, so I might be gone for most of the day.”
Lifting a brow as if to say, 'Go on', she continued, “And I was thinking about…” Scuffing her hoof along the wooden floor nervously as she did, “Well, telling them bout you. And, about your relatives and…” By Celestia, she wasn’t sure if asking him this was even a good idea. It was so awkward to ask permission to tell your friends a secret given by somepony who was trusting you with their life and being so calm about it!
Regarding Twilight for a moment and how she was tittering on the edge of becoming a ticking time bomb of stress, he said, “If you can keep them from panicking and spreading the news around, I wont mind.” And looked back down to his work, taking a sip of the tea saying, “Mmm, Raspberry.”
Twilight stood stock still in shock at how calmly he dismissed the matter without even an argument. She was expecting him to use that tone of voice with her like when he snapped her out of her panic yesterday, but instead he gave her the go ahead as long as she made sure the secret was kept quiet.
Looking back at Spike who was coming back into the room to get started on the book pile and thought, I should bring Spike along too, better to have an extra pair of eyes around the library when Mask is here. But left the question as to what to do about Masquerade. She could bring him with, extra proof of what she was telling her friends just in case, and also make sure he wasn’t up to something with her back turned.
A knock on the door stopped any further thought, and made her way to the door to be greeted by dirt brown coat and shaggy sand like mane of a stallion who’s lazy eyes seemed to pierce into her mind, “Do you mind getting my two faced cousin over here, he has some splainin‘ to do.”
Right there, she recognized Sham Gem and could only nod before calling back, “Mask, some ponies here to see you!”
Quickly, Masquerade came and grinned at Sham, who just narrowed his eye some while being greeted, “Sham, how‘s my lazy lump of a cousin been?”
“Slightly tired as since Father left for business a few weeks back, board as I don’t have anypony to play chess with, and irritated that your up to your random tricks.” He told, yawning at the end as if it took way too much effort to talk. “Come on, I want to hear your reasons of what my cat-for-sisters were talking about so I can take a nap.” Turing around and leaving at a slow pace.
Looking to Twilight he said, “Well, tea and biscuits with the Gem Clan cousins. Looks like I have plans of my own.” And walked out the door calling back, “Don’t expect me to be home any time soon!”
Twilight watch the two relatives walk away, one completely lax and slow as if he had better things to do, and the other holding his head high and proper posture. While an apple continued to orbit his head, turning a few heads.
It was then Twilight came to another conclusion, Mask is part of one weird family. Tapping her chin briefly, I wonder if all changelings are like that?
Near the outskirts of town and nearing the Everfree Forest, one would find a rather sizable camp with a number of ponies going about their choirs and checking the supplies they had or might need before setting off once more.
The Gem Clan as a whole were known as the economic masters to the five clans, as they have the skill and even know how on how to run business, conduct trade and have what many call uncanny luck.
For the two sisters, Ivory and Ebony, it was a life involving nonstop moving from one location to another and always seeing new faces. Though they don’t mind the traveling, nor do they mind the new ponies they meet. But the idea their Malek cousin gave out had them thinking. As much as they loved their nomadic life, the idea of staying someplace of the more permanent setting sounded nice.
When they brought up Masquerades idea to their older brother and explained as to what had transpired, to say he was livid would put it lightly. It was understandable, since their Father left for the changeling capital hidden in the badlands. Being left in charge of what can be seen as the main bulk of the Gem Clan, Sham had been doing all he could to prove his worth as a first heir. Not just for his father, but to his fellow clan members.
Lightly gliding from their perch on a cloud to the main tent, both sisters landed and went inside to tidy up the place before both their older bother and their cousin arrived. Looking around what many would call a place of absolute perfection, both sisters walked about the room for anything left out.
Documents, interest rates, marked paths, possible gold mines for trade and much more could be found laying here or there. True, their brother, though lazy, was remarkably organized and tidy and even precise in his work. It was a wonder to both Ivory and Ebony how this sibling of theirs could be so vigilant in his work, yet be such a sloth in everything else.
The sound of magic could be heard from the tent entrance, having the two turn around and find both brother and cousin enter in. fallowing behind were a number of other clan members, each having a substantial role in their camp.
The first to fallow the two heirs was a grey mare with ruffled wings and clipped right ear, with the left ear having a few rings. Her mane was a dark green and was tied into a number of braids that blended into one, while a sword was clasped under her right wing.
She was Mettle Gem, their soon to be successor of the camps guard to her father and mentor Valor Gem. Valor was one of many that had been brought with their Father to the capital, so that was why his daughter was taking his place.
Next was one of their main scouts by the name of Chance, who was also a pegasus with a brown coat with splotches of white and a muddy brown mane. His smirk held a charisma like charm to it, and has proven to be an effective scout for danger despite his young age.
After him was a the youngest of their group, being nearly the size of a colt and holding a few books near him in a green magic. His deep gold like coat and duel purple and blue mane made him stick out despite his size. This was Chronicler, Shams personal recorder assistant and future historian or adviser for the Gem clan. At the moment he wasn’t old enough to be an adviser, but he was required by clan law to record all that was to pass for latter referencing.
They all headed to the table that was set in the center of the tent, with Ivory and Ebony coming in to join them, respectively taking their older brothers right and left sides. Chronicler squeezed between both Sham and Ebony with quill and book at the ready in his green magic. Chance decided to take the right side, while Mettle took the left side. This left half of the table empty, and it was here that Masquerade took the center of that half to face Sham and his group.
After a brief calm, Sham nodded his head like a lazy bow, “It is good to see you again, second heir to the Malek Clan, Masquerade.”
In response, Masquerade did a much more formal bow of his head that didn’t steep to low to show any submission, “And it is good to see you, first heir to the Gem Clan, Sham.”
With that formality done, Sham gave a lazy sweep of his hoof saying, “I‘m sure you remember Mettle, Chronicler and Chance of the Gem Clan?” getting a nod from the only Malek in the tent, Sham tapped his recorder’s shoulder. With that signal, Chronicler lit his horn and cast a silencing spell over the tent, so not to be over heard.
“Now then Masquerade, tell us, why did you revile yourself to this pony: Twilight Sparkle?” He asked, somewhat folding his hooves over the other while leaning over the table, “Further more, why do you wish to involve the two second heirs to the Gem Clan in this endeavor, or further than that, why are you here and not back at the Malek house?”
Staying calm and not letting himself from making any quick responses, he asked, “Do you know what has been going on at the capital?”
Seeing his cousin shake his head, Masqurade told, “Their planning an invasion, ruler approved with three out of five clans consent.” Not seeing any interest being shown by Sham. All others gave a different response, ranging from both shock and outrage.
“But why would they do such a thing?” Ivory questioned, “Attacking Equestria would topple half the income for the clans!” Her sister quickly fallowed.
“Not to mention the cat would be even more out of the bag, and not to jus‘ ponies, but every nation!” Chance agreed with the Twins, not likeing the idea in the least.
Thinking it over, Mettle spoke, “The only one that would agree to this are Veron and Willed, I doubt master Midpoint would agree to this, He wouldn’t want to cause any economic problems for the other clans.” Thinking mainly on their current clan head Midpoint of the Gem clan.
“Don’t forget the Lue are nearly pacifists, and love to be around ponies in genial.” Chronicler piped in while thinking about it, “They wouldn’t agree just from principle alone.”
Through all of this Sham remained silent and thought about what was told. Tapping his hoof on the table to silence the others, he nodded for Masquerade to continue on, “The reason is because our stores of emotion have been drained and some minor changeling clans surrounding the area have been raiding them.” After this, he gathered magic and dispersed it into a new smoky illusion that showed the capital and a heart above it shrinking, “With how much has been lost, the current Queen has decided to call for a hostel take over on Equestria within five months.”
Dispersing it and replacing it with Ponyville he continued, “Despite this and being loyal to the Malek Clan, I could not bare the thought of doing this and decided to leave home to seek another where I might make ties with the ponies.” Showing an Image of Twilight he went on, “I came here on accident, getting a little lost. But I found this mare, and know her form my early days of pony infiltration my Mother put me through.”
Making that disappear he said, “I‘m hoping to use what bonds have been made to create a bridge between both changeling and pony alike, so we can advert a possible crisis among our clans if things go south.” Pointing to Ivory, and in turn Ebony, “I ask for your sisters to stay because they represent a clan that is not participating in the endeavor.”
Letting the Illusion fall and waiting for the current leader of the Gem Clan response, Masquerade stared his cousin down. Most would see his cousin Sham as a lazy bum that knows nothing but how to sleep and eat. On the contrary every changeling masquerading as ponies knew otherwise. Sham was a genius, and has shown that he can out wit most anypony in his way with planning.
So it didn’t come with great surprise at his next words, “Now that we know your reasons, and the official reason for the summons, I must ask. What is the real reason?” Giving Masquerade a hard look he stated, “If it was that simple, then they would send more collectors to gather emotion form all nations. But to call for an invasion would mean something more.”
With narrowed eyes to the black unicorn the first heir asked, “So tell us Masquerade, greatest master infiltrator of this day and age, what is really going on behind those doors in the capital?”
Regarding his earthen disguised cousin, Mask said, “Some of the members of all clans in the capital have been disappearing or outright turning on the Queen.” With a grim voice he told, “They wish to rebel on her, if she does not take action at the outer threats that have been raiding our stores and make us drain their power in skirmishes.”
Looking to the side he further explained, “Some of the Veron Clan have been putting even more pressure on her to take Canterlot and use it as a new place to take all emotion needed to push back the minor clans.”
“And you think befriending them into an alliance will make a better change in this coming battle?” Sham questioned.
“No, not in combat. The ponies have not had a single war in a thousand years, and don’t know the finer arts of the cloak and dagger.” Thinking of Twilight he said, “But befriending them will give us the power we need to fight back, and also secure ourselves with all the food we‘ll ever need and gain a strength for latter years.”
For a moment the tent remained quite as Sham stayed in his thinking pose, leaving all ponies but Masquerade shifting in their seats. With the smallest of smiles, Sham spoke, “Great minds think alike, and I find that we see the same thing.” Seeing his cousin lift a brow he told, “Father Midpoint had left me clues as to something being wrong, even if he hid it from most.”
Gesturing to those that were in the tent he said, “For one, why would my Father leave with all the elders, but also leave behind the promising younger generation that can live on their own?”
Masquerade remained silent, but the two sisters seemed to catch on and spoke as one, “Do you mean that clan head Father is possibly leaving the main bulk of our clan to you for safe keeping?”
Shaking his head to his sisters he said, “No, Father suspected something and left me in charge, while he and the others left, seeing this danger.” Looking around he stated, “Father doesn’t expect to live much longer.”
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can't
In the show officials It's nopony, in one word. Like nobody, but for Equestria main species. (And you don't need an uppercase in "pony" unless it's the first word in your sentence.)
can't
I think we found our new fallowing here.
It's Applejack, like carjacking but with Apple. (Don't ask me what applejackers do, I don't know.)
It's somepony. Yes, I know. Hasbro (and MLP:FiM's fans) can be a pain with all their ponieisms, no automatic corrector know them.
In all of the chapters so far you've used 'revile' instead of 'reveal' you might want to fix that along with switching 'fallowing' with 'following'. Also you used 'genial' instead of 'general'. In case you don't know how to find them in the chapter use Ctrl + F and then type in the word you're looking for and it'll take you too it/them.
4521011 almost! It's "somepony's " the apostrophe is there for a contaction (short for somepony is)
it's fine with just "smarter" on its own; some words require a "more" before it but then they don't have the "-er". For example: more intelligent.
also you need to work on homophones, there, their and they're; two, to and too.
there = a place, "over there"
their = an object belonging to someone "their watch"
they're = a contraction for "they are" "they're meeting for lunch"
two = a number " two sandwiches"
to = a verb "I'm going to do that"
too = a comparative "you are too relaxed"
5818374 Some of the chapters haven't been edited yet. I'm currently working with an editor that's been taking time to help point these things out. I have yet to get the this chapters edition.
Politics, always such a bloody thing to have around. Still at least we know why this version of Chrissy is going to invade Canterlot, tough choice of either getting more love and risking to be shown by all, or not and getting rebels in her hooves. But I have a sneaky feeling that this is the first act of Mask plan....
reveal
vile is disgusting
revile is to make something disgusting again
reveal is to expose
I normally don't comment on the infinite amount of grammatical and spelling errors in this fic, but...
i.imgur.com/rHvR6Ek.png
It literally JUST occurred to me that "revile" is supposed to be "reveal". God, this fic is so unreadable. Amazing concepts, but unreadable as heck.
8591111
I would suggest looking past the typo errors, as it is easy to tell what was clearly intended. For such a great story, to discard it because of that would be tragic.
I don't think you edited this chapter. You kept on putting words that sound the same, but mean something other than what I assume you meant. Also, I found this story by searching for long stories in new with the changelings tag. I found it some pages in.