It was a horrible summer. The sun's merciless heat had scorched Sweet Apple Acres, and caused a severe drought. The Apple family faced losing the property, since they had no bits to get water or pay for the land. Big Macintosh makes a desperate attempt by borrowing money from a shady faction. The money does wonders to help, but Big Macintosh is in debt. The ponies he borrowed from make a threat against his family, and he has to undertake a dangerous and difficult job to save them. How will it all turn out?
Constructive and friendly criticism is strongly encouraged.
Red Dead Redemption X MLP Crossover
Chapters (3)
There you go. An amazing soundtrack for the game this was based off. It goes well with the story, too.
Another epic RDR song to listen to.
Can't go wrong with an RDR crossover. Have you considered working with an editor or prereader?
2620566 No I have not, but I can get one if you want.
2620605 It's your story and your choice - you passed moderation, so you don't have to listen to me anymore. This is pretty decent stuff as-is, but this site has editing groups for a reason. Mostly I just commented to plug my own such group and tell you a decent way of making good on that request for criticism. Unless you're a famous author, it can be difficult finding random people to comment with good advice.
2620626 Alright, I'll check it out. Thanks.
2620649 No problem. I'll take a look at this myself sometime and share my own advice, too.
2620659 Thanks!
Umm... Where's the diplomacy that Mac wanted to use? There was no reasoning, no begging, nothing.
Good. Good. Good and fantastic work. It's just like rdr but with ponys. Now we just need some black jack and some entertainment if you get what I mean lol. Now Big Mac needs to become a blood thirsty killing and we got our selfs a winning. Keep it up.
2622185 First thing next chapter.
2622676 Well, I plan on Big Mac's transition to a bloodthirsty badass to be as smooth as possible. Since he's a really peaceful pony, you know. And thanks for the compliment!