• Published 10th Feb 2012
  • 3,337 Views, 97 Comments

Halo Derpy Grunts of Equestria - Grazy Polomare



What happens when three stranded grunts find themselves on Equestria?

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Chapter 9: The Quest

The aroma of a thousand pleasant scents drew him closer. He felt...calm.

How long has it been since I felt calm? He thought.

True, he never was much of a warrior, but then again most warriors weren't good at what he did.

"Go there!"

"Do this!"

That was all they said. That wasn't at all what he needed.

His tendrils were now rubbing against the surface of the wall...the smoothness reminding him of a distant past so long ago that it was before time itself.

What was he doing?

He was doing what he had always done. Right?

What was his past?

Why was he forgetting it?

The sight of a yellow creature caught him off guard.

It was a pony by the looks and specs of it. It had a pink mane that flowed over her poppy yellow coat like a scenic waterfall.

Her teal-colored pupils gazed up at him.

"Why hello there, you look like you need a check-up...if you don't mind of course."


It would be easy to snatch this creature and bring it back to the caves. There he would have company and entertainment. He always wanted to dissect something.



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Sugarcube Corner

In the warmth of the bakery, there was a mess of pots trays, and empty bags of flour as the pink pony hummed and stirred the bowl of cake mixture before putting it into the oven to be heated and eventually accompanied by a colorful assortment of sprinkles, sugar, and frosting.

However, she had an assistant to help her.

"Cooking is for girls!" Yapyap whined as the pink pony directed him to mix the flour with the water and butter.

"No it isn't silly," Pinkie laughed as she continued to stir her own pot, " Mr. Cake bakes all the time. There was this one time, where he baked this huge, ginormous cookie for his two itty bitty twins. But then I invited everypony to come and have a bite and boy did we party afterwards!"

All the grunt could do was heave a sigh and get back to mixing. After about another few minutes, the pink pony took both his and her pots and placed them into the oven.

"Now we have to wait before we add all the decorations. You know I always wanted Rairty to help me with that part of the process. But she always gets sooooooo dramatic about staining her mane and having bits of dough clinging her to her coat."

Pinkie Pie was an enigma to Yapyap. It wasn't just because she was extremely too happy and seemed to be on a hyper rush whenever she got up from bed. It was that she was just so pure and full of innocence as well as bliss. Back at home, he had only seen that kind of peace once. Then once again when he was drafted into the armada.

Both those times never lasted, could it mean the same fate for this wonderful creature before him?

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Sweet Apple Acres

When Yapflip told the story of how he had taken Rainbow Dash on a bet about whether or not he could handle her speed, and how he ended up catapulted into a tree, Flipyap fell on the floor laughing as if he had overdosed on the methane gas.

"What's so funny?" Yapflip sneered at the grunt who was making dirt drawings with his body.

"Oh come on Yapflip," Flipyap managed to say without breaking down on the floor again, "you've got to admit that even you looked like big dummy for trying that."

"Oh and not like you would do it!" Yapflip spat back.

"What's going on here" Yapyap Jr. intervened along with Pinkie Pie in tow.

"Nothing Yapyap, just go back and..."

But Flipyap blurted out the entire story before Yapflip could finish. By the time his brother concluded the tail, Yapflip wanted to go into a tree and stay there for the rest of his life.

Yapyap on the other hand, found himself rolling in the dirt as he cackled madly over his fellow comrade's blunder. He was still cackling until his noggin received the sharp blast of Yapflip's palm. The other palm collided with Flipyap's head.

"How do you like that you laughing hooligans?" Yapflip 'snided'.

There was a chorus of giggles from the tiny little filly known as Applebloom, who was being joined by a bright orange pegasus and a creamy white unicorn. The three fillies shared in a warm embrace before introducing themselves.

"I'm Applebloom, and these are my Cutie Mark Crusader pals Sweetie Bell and Scootaloo."

The orange pegasus was eyeing the dwarf in front of her with an expression between disgusted and intrigued.
"Are you guys like..." she began, "...aliens?"

"Why yes little grunt," Yapflip began before he was pummeled by Yapyap Jr.

Rubbing his gray rock of a forehead, Yapflip stared down at his assailant.

"What was that for?" he chided.

"That isn't a grunt numbskull," Yapyap Jr. hissed, "she's a pony"

"Well excuuuuusseee me," Yapflip blurted out, clearly annoyed, " she look like she could make good grunt."

"Yeah," Flipyap added, "she could be good grunt who runs like coward right?"

There was another outburst of laughter as Applejack and the Cutie Mark Crusaders joined in. Only, Scootaloo and Yapflip refused to join in. As the laughter continued, Yapflip was thinking back to the day before training. When he was little, and his older siblings told him stories next to a minuscule Flipyap about how there was once a time in the distant past where Unggoy could laugh freely and do as they pleased. Yapflip always held on to that idea when he was younger, but dropped the idea until the day he met the veterans at training.

Yapflip could only now grin at the congregation of interplanetary species before him. Was this not why he had rebelled so much? Just to see his comrades laugh once in a while? But they never did and he ended up watching the stars.

"Hey there," said Twilight as she, Spike, and Rarity traveled into view.

"Yapflip here thought he could fly higher then a goose in a strong wind." Applejack repeated the story and there were a few more laughs, until Yapflip ended up waving his arms into the air, demanding that they stop it already.

"Hey," Rainbow Dash looked around, "Has anyone seen Fluttershy?"

"I would think that she would still be at her cottage, tending to the animals you know," Twilight said.

"Well since we are all here," Pinkie Pie's sly look only made Yapyap's eyes widened in disbelief as she proclaimed the next words.

"LET'S ALL HAVE A PARTY!!"

"But we had one last night," Yapyap Jr. moaned.

"Oh don't be such a winy pony Yapyap," it was remarkable at how she had learned his name so quickly, "besides I want to throw something for the other aliens."

"Well then a party is in order," Rarity chirped, "let's all go and get Fluttershy."
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The cottage looked forlorn in the sunlight that was dancing off the grass. An ominous silence griped the party of ponies and extraterrestrials as they began to march their way into the seemingly peaceful cottage.

"Fluttershy is never this quiet," Twilight murmured as the group proceeded forward.

"Darling, I feel that our dear Fluttershy is in need of some rest," Rarity said before she went on in a long lecture of how sleep made you more attractive. Most of the grunts droned her voice out, except for Flipyap, who seemed genuinely interested.

The bright, strawberry-red door stoof ajar, allowing a beam of light into the otherwise dark structure. The group stopped, and Yapflip sniffed the air for danger. Using a tactic they had seen several 'demons' do in the movies that were sold in the black market, they positioned themselves along the walls before Yapflip dived head-first, a large wooden stick griped firmly in his chubby palm.

"Show yourselves cowards!" Yapflip howled, the club spinning like a turbine.

After about a good minute of inspecting the scattered pots and pans as well as the overturned furniture, the grunts ruled the area as safe.

"Sweet Celestia!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed at the sight of the debris lying idly over the house.
"If I didn't know any better," Pinkie Pie pondered out loud as a mysterious, gray cap appeared over her head like some sort of demon helmet, "I'd say that our good-kind-never-hurt-anypony friend has been foal-napped!"

Yapyap Jr. could only stare at the pipe sticking out of her mouth, letting bubbles of gas into the air before disappearing in a pop.

"Celestia only knows where she is..." Twilight looked up at the sky, every muscle in her face contracting to hide the fear that was slowly taking hold of the entire group. They began to search the premises for any sign of their friend, but the search was fruitless, except for a pair of hoof-prints leading into the Everfree Forest.

"For all we know, Fluttershy is in there," Rainbow Dash stuck her cyan hoof towards the icky, sickening group of trees that signaled the border of that horrible...horrible woodland.

"We can't send anypony in there, maybe the police will help us," Twilight began.

"Sadly, I think it could take them days and who knows how far they would have gotten, those monsters." Rarity looked like she was ready to tear something apart.

"Well I guess then they are our only hope, cause who else is going to try and go..."

"I'll do it."

All eyes turned to face Flipyap, who looked suddenly like he was about to have a spasm.
"I said...I will go...I like that pony...we find her for you ponies."

"Really?" Applebloom suddenly shoved her way through the assembly to stare face to face with the insect-like alien dwarf. "You'll do that for good 'ol Fluttershy?"

"Yeah, we will," YapYap Jr. joined in, " and we will bring her back!"

Yapflip simply gaped wide-eye at his fellow soldiers. "Are you CRAZY! That forest is filled with bad stuff. BAD STUFF I TELL YOU! BAAADDD!"

Flipyap looked at his brother, and did something no one, grunt or pony, expected. He laid his arm over his shoulder.

"Brother, this pony saved us. We would be dead if not for she being nice pony. We need to do this. I no asking you to join."

Yapflip could have sworn that at that exact moment, his brother, looked exactly like him, when he had sacrificed his own safety to get his brother through that dastardly training course.

"I'm going." he whispered.

"And so am I," Rainbow Dash soared into view, "no one, pony or no pony, messes with the mane six and gets away with it."

"Wait!" Pinkie Pie shot her hoof up to stop the rescue party from proceeding forward onto their new quest. "I want to say a few words to Yapyap Jr."

Yapyap walked up to the mare who took him to the side.

"What do you need Pinkie?" Yapyap asked.

"Please be safe there, I know you said you were a fighter and all..."

"I said what?" the grunt inquired with a bewildered tone.

"At the party, you said you fought 'many demons and warriors on that great..."

But his palm muffled the next words before they could be uttered into the still air.

"No...I...don't want to talk about that."

"Oki doki loki then, but please," suddenly Pinkie's piercing blue eyes showed no hint of humor or laughter, "please do try not to end up...like that one alien back on the ship."

Yapyap knew she was referring to Twitchy. If only she knew though how special a grunt he was.

"I promise."

The snout suddenly transformed into an illuminating smile that made Yapyap Jr. feel something he had never felt in a long while. An emotion he was sure he had repressed.
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After pulling out an impressive array of supplies for the mission, Pinkie gave Yapyap Jr. one more hug.

Twilight handed Flipyap a tiny, green notebook with a stylized flower embezzled on its cover. "Just so you know what is safe and what isn't"

Rarity gave them all a wave of her hooves, wishing them good luck and that the grunts were not as 'repulsive' as she thought they originally were.

"Don't worry," Rainbow Dash called back, "we'll come back with Fluttershy you'll see."

"In the meantime, we will get the police in case she is in Ponyville," Twilight shouted back, "We will send you a letter through Owloysius ok?"

"Who's that?" Flipyap blurted back.

But he had to turn and dash to catch up with the others.

The last thing he heard was a chorus of cheers as he, his fellow Unggoy, and the cyan pegasus dashed down into the dark, forbidding woods.

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