Chapter Nine
Chapter Nine
"So this is the town of Ponyville..."
It seemed reasonable to conclude that the book he'd studied last night was several years out of date regarding its facts. The pictures included had shown a much smaller and much simpler town with specific landmarks, a limited market square and fewer homes. Even the most recent pictures included seemed considerably lacking compared to the pseudo-urban sprawl before him just across the bridge.
In some ways this Ponyville reminded him of Karakura Town in terms of size and magnitude, the differences in populace and structure notwithstanding.
Currently he stood just outside the town with his impromptu escort, observing as many ponies of every imaginable color combination scheme went about what he could only assume were their daily routines. It was strange to see them tending to matters without the use of hands for grasping and manipulating various objects.
"Sure is! An' hard ta believe it was all made possible thanks ta zap apples an' ingenuity," Applejack stated.
He suspected the word Applejack meant was "perseverance" rather than ingenuity but said nothing about it. He was more focused on those that made up the residents of the town, wondering how they'd constructed so much when the majority of the population had historically been earth ponies according to what he'd read. Some of the structures looked extremely intricate, involved and otherwise complex. Lacking hands couldn't have made the work easy.
"We can stay out here and stare at the town as long you as you want, Ulquiorra, but learning is better done in the town rather than outside," Twilight spoke up.
"A fair point," Ulquiorra replied. He must've gotten lost in his own thoughts; a dangerous practice to be involved in. There would be plenty of time to answer these questions later on. Without further discussion he began walking again toward the center of the town, the others not far behind him.
"Twilight?" Spike whispered as he continued riding along on her back. "I know I went along with this idea and all, but do you really think this is going to work? What if Ulquiorra can't learn about making friends? Or the Elements of Harmony? What if-"
"Now's not the time to be having such thoughts, Spike," Twilight whispered back as they lingered near the back of their group of friends. "Ponyville's a wonderful place to be. If he can find out anything about friendship it's gonna be here," she explained.
Spike didn't say anything in response as they continued walking Ulquiorra into the heart of Ponyville. Slowly but surely other ponies were starting to take notice of his presence, some stopping what they were doing to stare at him but he seemed to pay them no mind.
"So where should we start the tour first?" Applejack asked.
"Sugarcube Corner!" Pinkie stated.
"That might be better saved until later, Pinkie," Twilight replied. If Ulquiorra hadn't wanted any of the cake Pinkie was offering him at the initial meeting then the bakery probably wouldn't be his location of choice either. "We could try the Golden Oaks Library."
"Twi' ya know the library ain't no place ta be learnin' 'bout friendship. Ya gotta get out and experience first hoof," Applejack stated.
"Ooh! Ooh!" Pinkie was in the middle of saying. She'd had the perfect place in mind and was just about to say it when she was suddenly stopped by her body convulsing and her tail twitching like mad. She knew exactly what that meant. "Twitchy tail!"
Ulquiorra watched as everyone except for the two pegasus guards and Twilight scattered and hid under something close by. This was indeed strange behavior even for a world filled with magical equines. "Twitchy tail?" he asked.
"Pinkie's got something called the Pinkie Sense. She can sometimes predict when things are gonna happen. Twitchy tail means take cover because something's-"
She was interrupted by a loud commotion above her head that made her flinch. Looking up she saw that Ulquiorra was now standing right beside her, his left arm extended as his hand held firmly onto a large parcel. She could figure out that the package was dropped by one of the pegasi tasked with delivering mail to the area, and it would've fallen right on her head while she was explaining the situation. But how had Ulquiorra been at her side before she'd even finished speaking?
"-about to fall out of the sky..." she finished. "That was incredible! I never even saw you move!"
"Do packages usually fall from the sky?" Ulquiorra asked as he brought his arm in. He'd only just started to study the package when the sound of flapping wings could be heard approaching. Looking up he saw a gray pegasus mare with yellow mane and tail flapping her way into ear shot, making it very easy to make out her hat, what looked like a mail bag, and two eyes that couldn't seem to cooperate on a particular direction to focus, her cutie mark seeming to be a cluster of bubbles.
"Gee thanks Mister, nice catch there," the mare stated.
"Ditzy?" Twilight asked. Now it made a lot of sense.
Ditzy? A rather strange name even for a pony. And why exactly was she tasked with delivering such a large package?
"Oh hey Twilight. Sorry about that. Rush delivery to Canterlot, they just now realized it shoulda been sent out three days ago. They forgot to put it on the train so now I've gotta deliver it," she explained as one of her eyes focused on Twilight for the purpose of addressing her. "This a friend of yours?" she asked as she turned to look at Ulquiorra.
"Not exactly. Just someone we're showing around town. Meet Ulquiorra Cifer, Ulquiorra this is Ditzy Doo. She's one of the best mailmares in the area, currently holds a 95 percent delivery success rate."
"Most ponies call me Derpy. I don't know why though," Ditzy replied, acting as if she hadn't even heard Twilight complimenting her skills. "Could I get my package back now?" she asked.
He observed the strange mare. How exactly had she been tasked with mail delivery if her eyes couldn't properly focus? How was her success rate so high? And why wasn't she giving him a strange look like so many others had? Without a word Ulquiorra handed the package back to Ditzy, watching as she tucked it securely in her bag.
"Thanks. I better get goin' now. See ya later Twilight, see ya later Mr. Ulquiorra Cifer."
He watched as Ditzy left, effortlessly carrying the package with her in the direction of Canterlot. He turned his attention back to Twilight to inquire about a number of recent questions. However he was too slow as she was first to speak.
"Thanks for saving me, Ulquiorra, usually when Pinkie's tail twitches I'm the one who gets it," she stated.
He considered pointing out that she wasn't in any actual danger as the package wasn't all that heavy, although his physical strength might affect his judgement on that. Then he considered explaining Princess Celestia's prior orders of not harming any of her subjects -which could be construed as taking form in an active or passive manner- but decided against that as well. Instead he settled for gaining some answers of his own.
However before he could do that the other four came back out to speak with him. And slowly others that had been more wary of him were coming into the area after the spectacle.
"Ah tell ya Mr. Cifer that was some mighty quick actin' on yer part," Applejack stated as she stepped over to him. "Ah didn' know ya could teleport like Twilight could."
"Yeah I didn't even see you move. One second you were standing all the way over there and the next you're all the way over here before Derpy can finish dropping her package on Twilight's head! That's so cool!" Pinkie stated.
A simple flexing of his sonido skill and they believed he'd teleported. And simply following one interpretation of Princess Celestia's orders and they were treating him like he was some sort of hero. These ponies were such simpletons and idiots. His actions certainly hadn't been motivated by some foolish concept such as heroism but rather a personal interest in keeping his guide from being harmed and complicating his mission to learn about this new world.
"I've witnessed what you call teleportation several times. What I performed just now wasn't it. What you witnessed is a technique all Arrancar possess known as sondio, which is simple high speed physical movement that is faster than the eye can follow and the mind can process," Ulquiorra explained as he placed his hand back in his pocket before any of the ponies could asked him about it. "If we're quite through with the interruptions perhaps we can move onto more relevant matters such as the exploration of the town."
Twilight felt a little put off by Ulquiorra's otherwise cold response, but she was willing to shrug it off and let it go. Right now they had more important things to do and there was a whole lot of Ponyville to see. "Right this way then. I think I know right where to start the grand tour; the Ponyville Markletplace," she replied.
Wordlessly he followed behind Twilight as she lead the way, the rest of the group following close behind him and each with their own idea concerning the wisdom of this decision.
"Ah hope Princess Celestia made the right decision havin' Twilight escort Mr. Cifer 'round Ponyville," Applejack commented to the others.
The current noble jumped at the sound of Princess Celestia's unexpected sneeze, the sound reverberating and seemingly magnified by the throne room's walls. First he'd been subjected to this inane new rule of hers -in front of his fellow nobles as well as the commoner ponies- and now scared in such an undignified manner. It was as if she had absolutely no respect for proper social order. What else could go wrong on this day?
Under normal circumstances the Ponyville marketplace would be hustling and bustling and a considerable amount of commotion would be going on, to the point it would be hard to focus on something in particular unless you were paying close attention. Buying, selling and trading various goods and commodities meant a lively setting that required a decent amount of vigilance to avoid getting run into or running into someone else.
These were not normal circumstances.
As Pinkie, Fluttershy, Applejack, Twilight, Spike, Ulquiorra and the two pegasus guards strolled into the marketplace the normal hustle and bustle dropped in volume to the level of whispers as everyone became aware of the presence of the new and unfamiliar stranger in their midst. nearly everyone stopping what they were doing on the spot, some of them stumbling over each other in a dumbstruck manner.
Ulquiorra paid no mind to the silence and confused looks, they were nothing he wasn't accustomed to. Truthfully it was a sign of some measure of intelligence that the townspeople -perhaps townsponies was more accurate- didn't run up to welcome him as freely as Ditzy Doo had. She hadn't even given him a second look before treating him as an everyday sight; friendly but not overly intelligent.
"They're all staring," Fluttershy whispered as she looked around, feeling herself more unnerved by that fact than Ulquiorra's statement earlier.
"Ah reckon they're confused an' tryin' ta make sense o' what they're seein'. We don' really get many Arrancar 'round these parts," Applejack replied as she noticed the looks they were getting.
"How fortunate for that to be the case," Ulquiorra thought as they walked along. A loose Hollow in this world, guided by pure instinct, would think nothing of gorging itself on every last soul in this small town, each one of them charged with a surprisingly significant level of reiryoku that exceeded what most humans were capable of producing.
That thought brought his mind back to the pony called Fluttershy who was on his left side currently. Out of all those Twilight Sparkle had introduced as friends her reiatsu and reiryoku appeared to be the lowest; lower than even the dragon Spike. It was entirely possible she was borderline in terms of whatever passed for spiritual awareness in this world and would serve as a reference point for establishing a spectrum of strength.
If he had to speculate he would assume Fluttershy was slightly above the level of the human girl who had been able to resist Yammy's gonzui technique, if for no other reason then the fact that his mere presence wasn't overwhelming her and driving her to her knees.
"Ooh! I know! I know! Let's go visit the joke shop! There's always lots of fun stuff there guaranteed to get a laugh!" Pinkie chimed in as she bounced.
"I see no beneficial purpose in the act of laughing. To me it's nothing more than a useless gesture," Ulquiorra stated simply.
Immediately all whispers in the marketplace stopped when those present heard Ulquiorra's words to Pinkie. Surely he hadn't said that to her...right?
"Oh...dear..." Fluttershy whispered.
"...What?" Pinkie asked as she looked at him.
Applejack stepped back and pulled her stetson down over her eyes, not wanting to see just how ugly this was going to get. Ulquiorra was a goner for sure.
Ulquiorra turned and faced her before speaking. "I said that I see no beneficial purpose in the act of laughing and I consider it to be nothing more than a useless gesture. Regardless of whether or not it's your particular Element, I consider it a simple waste of time that could be better utilized otherwise. It is not something I would ever consider engaging in," he explained calmly.
Other ponies began backing away as they watched Pinkie sputtering and stuttering, her body twitching in ways they weren't accustomed to seeing with any of her Pinkie Sense predictions, trying to formulate coherent responses but coming up with nothing but utter gibberish and words nopony was familiar with, everything finally coming to a point as she fell over sideways like someone had just tipped a statue.
"My brain hurts," Pinkie whined pitifully as she lay on the ground, her back leg twitching.
Ulquiorra couldn't understand what had just happened, how Pinkie could so easily be floored with a simple statement about the ineffectiveness of laughter. She was certainly an unusual entity to interact with.
"Ulquiorra, could I see you for a minute?"
He looked up at Twilight's statement, the second time in less than an hour she'd addressed him in such a tone and manner. It was more than likely she wished to educate him on his lack of tact around those she considered her friends. Wordlessly he turned and followed after her as Spike and the others remained behind, obviously concerned with Pinkie's current wellbeing. He walked past the many stand keepers, assorted ponies and at least one zebra in what appeared to be a fedora to underneath a large tree as he followed Twilight's lead until they were well away from any prying ears.
"Am I correct in assuming your intent is to lecture me about my having committed some vague offense I wasn't aware of?" Ulquiorra asked, denying Twilight the option of the first word in the discussion. While she was left momentarily speechless he followed up. "If you intend to insist that I apologize for some transgression I've unknowingly committed then I decline."
Twilight was...well she was more or less dumbstruck by what Ulquiorra had just said to her. He was quick in deducing the reason she'd brought him over here, and just as quick at informing her that it wasn't going to be happening. But then again she knew he was smart after her discussions with him the day before well into the night, and the several rounds of chess they'd engaged in. She knew that this wasn't going to be easy; appealing to his emotional side wasn't going to work, and it was unlikely she could appeal to his logical mind on a matter he didn't fully comprehend. She was going to have to play hardball if she wanted to get anywhere...
"I could order you, you know," she pointed out.
"You could make such an attempt. However I will still decline to comply. If your friend became emotionally distraught over something I said that wasn't to her liking then it's no consequence of mine. I see no reason to apologize," Ulquiorra replied evenly, not even blinking at the notion of being ordered. "Furthermore I don't believe you would make such an attempt as you're aware of the futility of the situation," he continued.
"Say what?" Twilight asked as she blinked. What was he talking about now?
"Based on my observations yesterday it's safe to assume that you value the opinion of Princess Celestia over many others and have taken great pride in your assignment. If you order me to apologize and I decline the most you can do is order me back to Canterlot palace where I will be assigning a failed report of my findings regarding the concept of friendship, the results of which will likely reflect badly on your own performance as an educator. As you don't wish to jeopardize your own standing with your teacher I don't believe you'll attempt such a gamble," Ulquiorra explained calmly.
Twilight flinched at the revelation. His analytical skills were as sharp as any surgeon's scalpel and cut just as deeply, but in a far more painful manner. He was right that she couldn't risk sending him back to Canterlot this early in the day without Princess Celestia possibly thinking bad of her handling this assignment. She really couldn't punish his stubbornness in any effective manner, and failure to do so would simply let him get away with being rude to Pinkie in a manner that hurt her. He basically had her over a barrel and he knew it.
But then again...
"You're right. There's not a whole lot I can do unless I want to admit to Princess Celestia that I failed to be a proper educator," Twilight admitted. However she was quick to follow up with another sentence. "Except for submitting a report of my own detailing how you've been lax in fulfilling your assigned purpose and shirking your duties in learning about friendship. That wouldn't look too good for you either. So it appears we're at a bit of an impasse," she pointed out.
Ulquiorra didn't even blink in response. She was correct in the fact that they were at an stalemate moment, neither one of them able to do much without the situation coming back to bite them.
"Well played, Twilight Sparkle," he admitted, acknowledging that she had discovered something she actually could use effectively other than the threat of authority. Her observational skills were certainly acceptable. "What would you suggest?"
"He's me..."
Spike, Applejack and Fluttershy had remained behind to tend to the fallen Pinkie while Twilight had a word with Ulquiorra in private much like she had back at Sweet Apple Acres. During that time Pinkie had managed to right herself and sit up again, however her demeanor had changed considerably in that short amount of time. While she certainly wasn't in Pinkamena territory yet she definitely wasn't the happy pouncing pony that everypony knew and loved so much.
"What're ya talkin' 'bout Sugarcube?" Applejack asked as she turned her attention away from the other two party members and over to Pinkie's currently sitting form.
"Ulqy's just like me when I was growing up. No friends, check. No cake, check. Desolate location, check. Always frowning, check. Not knowing about laughing, double check! Ulqy's everything I was back on my parent's rock farm. He's what I could've been if Rainbow Dash hadn't done the Sonic Rainboom and we all got our cutie marks!" Pinkie stated.
The idea was more than a little disturbing and left her feeling uneasy, with herself and her surroundings. How had she not noticed it sooner? What if she'd never discovered the joy of throwing parties and making ponies happy? Would she be just like Ulquiorra was and lack a passion for life and everything else? Would she be cold and unfeeling and have a stare that made those around her wince and turn away from her? Would she have turned out just like the Arrancar?
"They're coming back," Spike stated and pointed, bringing their attention to the sight of Ulquiorra and Twilight walking through the crowd and back to their previous position.
"Ah wonder wha' they talked about," Applejack muttered.
There was silence as Ulquiorra approached slowly and seemingly methodically, coming to a stop in front of Pinkie and looking down at her. There was a great degree of tension in the air before her spoke again, addressing her directly.
"Perhaps during my stay in Equestria you can teach me about the importance of laughter?" he asked her. It wasn't a question made by his own decision but rather one Twilight had insisted upon. If he wasn't going to issue an apology -and he wasn't- then she was determined to correct the situation, the best way she knew how being to have him ask her friend about one of the key aspects to friendship and harmony and learn about them. And right now to Twilight, laughter seemed like a good place to start.
He observed how almost immediately the pink pony's bright and overly cheerful exterior returned in full force, and with it her unusual reiatsu flaring out enough to blanket a sizable area, erasing whatever measure of concern it seemed she was experiencing previously.
"Sure thing Ulqy! Put 'er there!" she said and extended her right foreleg again.
Ulquiorra nearly withdrew his hand from his pocket but stopped when he noticed something that hadn't been there previously; a band wrapped around her hoof. Something wasn't right. "And what pray tell is this you have on your hoof?" he asked.
"This?" Pinkie asked as she turned her hoof over in what should've been an impossible manner to reveal the contraption attached to the metallic band. "This is a joy buzzer."
"And how does it work?" Ulquiorra asked.
"Oh it's really simple. First you strap it on your hoof just like this," she said, referring to what she'd just done. "Then you get somebody to shake hooves with you, just like this," she continued and pressed her other hoof to it to give the demonstration of how a joy buzzer was used. It wasn't until afterwards that she realized what she'd done as her body was exposed by a significant degree of electricity, enough to light up her eyeballs and alternatively illuminate her skeleton, he mane and tail becoming more frizzed out than ever once the charge dissipated.
Ulquiorra watched the entire display without even blinking. She'd intended to use such a device on him? And if that was her intent why had she used it on herself instead?
"I fail to see why such a device would be referred to as a joy buzzer," he replied before turning to address Twilight. "Is this considered an appropriate situation for laughter?"
"Probably not..." Twilight finally replied as she looked at her friend. The black sooted face and coughing of black clouds at least looked funny, and the fact that she'd fallen for her own prank through a simple question was pretty funny. But laughing just didn't seem right in this situation.
Then again it wasn't all that funny when Gilda had fallen for the trick either.
"Wow," Pinkie coughed. She never realized it before but those things hurt!
Applejack and Spike were the only ones present to really find the entire situation amusing enough to chuckle at. Pinkie falling for her own prank wasn't something you saw everyday. The fact that Ulquiorra had caused it with nothing but a simple question just seemed all the funnier.
"It would seem things are not going according to whatever plan you had formulated when we set out," Ulquiorra commented as he turned his attention to Twilight. If she intended for him to be surrounded by new friends who were eager to greet him and make him feel welcomes right about now, then she was quite sorely mistaken.
"Maybe not but I'm not about to give up. Come on, I've got another idea on where we can go and get better results than we are here," Twilight stated. She had a brainstorm brewing and wanted to see it through before anything else came up.
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Oh god i don't think this espada is ready for the pink WMD....without his powers he is boned.....good story also man keep it up!
Yay
I await the day where he meets Rainbow. I await the moment when she sees him as a threat and tries to take him out like a loyal friend, instead if listening to reason as she is prone to ignore. And I await the moment when Ulquiorra reveals how badass he is and immediately beats her. Don't care how you do it, don't care when you do it. All I care is that Rainbow learns that it is FUTILE to attack a high ranked Arrancar, and that any effort put into such an act will end with you dead or dying.
God I fuckin love Ulquiorra.
His emptiness is what makes him an unique character.
I'm just waiting for the moment when he shows Equestria what true despair is like.
I'm actually really hoping he meets Pinkamena. I don't even know why, I just am.
Well, at least Twilight was able to hold her own with her intellect. Perhaps Ulquiorra has yet to battle wits with her on certain ends
2873517 I hope it goes along the lines of her tackling him full force and all it results in is with him saying "Why are you attacking me?" and rainbow with a head ache followed by injuries to her legs when she tries to punch and buck him.
2873659
I WANT THEM TO SHIP AND HAVE HIDEOUS VASTO LORD/PONY HYBRID CHILDREN
2873826 I am strangely perfectly damn fine with this idea. And thus my soul falls further. Hm, didn't even realize I still HAD my soul after all the stuff I've found and read on the internet.
He really doesn't belong in the Friendship is Magic universe. Yet, seeing him interact with his usual mannerisms makes reading about it even more intriguing. Heh.
Pinkamena and ulquiorra ....OMG YES
Good chapter, as usual.
2873708 Personally I can't wait for her to eat a few layers of ground after Ulquiorra effortlessly moves outta the way with Sonido...
Then proceeds to piss Rainbow royally off by dodging each of her attacks.
2873397 Whatcha mean, "without his powers"? He can't release Mercielago is all - he still has Sonido, Cero, Bala, High Speed Regeneration AND the Gran Rey Cero along with his Espada abilities. He's got more than enough for ANYTHING Equestria has to offer!
... Except... maybe Poison Joke... God (and Charlie_K) only knows what'll happen....
Fluttershy's reiatsu probably increases dramatically when her friends have been harmed.
2874120
He never really tried to go into his true form. He just said the words and when it didn't work he accepted it.
I believe that if he truly wanted to go into his true form he would have done so easily.
But this is all just speculation. Who knows what happends.
2874120
I personally like to think poison joked Ulquiorra has to talk in song and cant stop smiling
Yay for more Ulqy!
And double 
, for me being named your editor, it truly is an honor. 
Below are some typos I found, most of which seem to be commas in places that need a break. I'll send you a PM to talk about me helping with your next chapter. 
*Applejack replied as she notice - Applejack replied as she noticed
*particular Element I consider it a simple waste - particular Element, I consider it a simple waste
*pitifully as she laid on the ground - pitifully as she lay on the ground
*him over here and just as quick - him over here, and just as quick
*the night and the several rounds - the night, and the several rounds
*cut just as deeply but in - cut just as deeply, but in
*now to Twilight laughter seemed - now to Twilight, laughter seemed
*him feel welcomes right about now then - him feel welcome right about now, then
2874410
That's is just cruel...
2873517 im awaiting this momentus moment well i want to see rainbow knocked down a few pegs and stay there
2874410 ...
...
...
... Please tell me I'm NOT the only terrified by that thought?
2874280 True. So at the moment he can't just shift lazily he has to focus a fair bit. But still, at that point he isn't gonna release Murcielago for anything less of Timberwolves or something.
2875147Thank you.
2875763 but knowing rainbow after she "deems" ulq as a "non threat" (after she figures out she cant do ANYTHING anyway) she'll no doubt try to ask ulq how he can do those sweet moves as well as try to get him to teach her xD with a prompt its impossible for you xDD and o.0 man she will be shocked when ulq can easily keep up with her with his sonido
VPinkie and Ulquiorra. Prepare for the worst.
Loved the ending of the fic, and the twist of Pinkie and Ulquiorra being the same was nothing short of brilliant.
For me the most exciting part of this chapter is
Why? Because I count it as a small but definite piece of character progression. I doubt that when he first came to equestria he would think it fortunate that no other Arrancar have come there. Instead he would have not cared if they had come, and wouldn't have cared if they brought devastation to the ponies or feasted on their souls.
I also like the "he's me before the rainboom" line of reasoning from Pinkie, it's a realization I don't normally see Pinkie make in fics where she interact with sad/emotionless characters in fics, and thought it was a nice touch
I simply can not wait for the situation to arise where the ponies literally have no other option than for Celestia to allow Ulquiorra to use Segunda Etapa. the reactions from the ponies alone would be worth the wait.
2878973
Damnit all of you pony fans stop reading my notes already!
2875177
Do you really think he'll need his zanpakutou for mere timberwolves? I think it'll take a fair higher degree of threat. Maybe a few thousand dragons might make him use it.
2880268 ... Yeah you're right, I'm sorry.
Ursa Major then? And he just doesn't wanna put up with it any longer then he has too?
2881328
Heh, maybe. if it gets in his way and annoys him.
I really hope that he stays the way he is...
Awsome story so far by the way! As long as he stays apathetic and kicks some manticore/hydra/________-butt later on then this story is gonna be awsome!
I love how he always destroys Pinkie with his logic seeing as she herself is so illogical.
2873578 Yes... "true despair"
38.media.tumblr.com/c31d6838dd26a8a891aa6c5e6641b0da/tumblr_n7566dTmHG1tbv18wo7_1280.png
In the form of wing boner s
4764888
These ponies were such simpletons and idiots. Another great line!
If a joybuzzer really hurts that much, then Ulquiorra has a point in that they really aren't good for laughing.
2874137 I want to see his reaction when she does the stare
Yeah, the redundancy problem in this story doesn't seem to be getting better. Parts like the one I quoted above keep popping up in the story where a character does or says something which easily conveys everything the reader needs to know (in other words, it "shows" instead of "tells"), and then the story itself just repeats the exact same information by stating it directly ("tell" instead of "show"). This just makes me feel like I'm reading every paragraph twice in a row, because everything keeps repeating.
I get the feeling that you were worried that readers wouldn't be able to get the meaning behind something hinted at by one of the characters, so you ended up outright saying it to avoid any possible issues.
Aside from redundancy, everything still seems fine so far. Celestia was starting to act absolutely ridiculous (to the point I felt like rolling my eyes every time she had so much as a thought) with her actions, but everyone else seems very in-character. Along with that, the descriptions and dialogue have both massively improved since that overly long info dump that was the first chapter. You were certainly right when you said the quality greatly improved later on. I can safely say that you are a very talented writer, and I look forward to reading the rest of this great story.
5367518
Much appreciated.
But how do I go about showing something in a story, rather than just telling it?
...Twilight is having a brainstorm
He... He broke... He broke Pinkie!
The end is nigh, ponies!
...and the future implications of Pinkie's declaration that he is her are just terrifying.
Imagine, if you will, an arrancar of Ulqy's stature with all of the randomness, chaotic fourth wall breaking, and hyperactive humor of The Pink One. Put him in the same town as the original and you may have enough concentrated madness to achieve pinkicality. We are talking atom bomb levels of Pie.
7308558
*Ponders that last thought* ...Welp, there goes any chance of a good night's sleep.
The most action so far, man doesn't this make you pumped or what?!?!