The crash was bad. Her wings were fractured in many spots. She wasn't going to heal in a couple days. Instead, it was going to take her 6 months. Six months without flying, there was nothing more uncool, unawesome, and unradical. That was until she chose to stay with Applejack and her family. Broken wings left a hole, one that could only be filled, evidently, by Applejack.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Standard concept, but one with plenty of room for variation within it. Lets see where you go with this. *tracks, will read later*
I like this story but I think RD would be in for more of a frenzy in the hospital. I thought that she seemed too calm to fit her personality. Still a good story and I can't wait to see what you do with it.
(Authors Note): So, this is my first story, I hope you like it
Anyway, I might need someone to be an editor for my story (seeing as that I don't have one yet) to help improve my story.
All in all, the fact that my story is liked is SO AWESOME
Pretty Good start, im looking orward to reading the rest of this - gotta love AppleDash. XD
this is great
lol'd at the 'sleep with you again' moment
Great at the moment, some small irritation moments like the repeating at:
"pinning her to the wall, stomach to the wall" (could be they pinned her, stomach to the wall).
But else I enjoyed the story and am waiting for the next chapters
Loving it so far. Really not much to say other than I hope that the next updates are as good as this one.
Thanks for the positive feedback everypony
You know what would be awesome? Just share this story with your friends, spread it around, get people to rate and comment.
208243I will share this with a lot of friends. Also if you haven't read my friend's fic "Friendship Is Tough" then you should! I'm trying to promote his story a lot because it is a reason of how we became friends.
210658 Thanks, I really appreciate it
I haven't read it yet, but I will do so
I feel sorry for anyone that has to write Zecora into their fics.
Excellent chapter im awaiting more.
I love what you've done with Rainbow Dash's inner self and how you used it for the reveal. It was nicely paced and realistic, which is a good change from the "OMG I think I'm in love because her eyes are pretty and now what do I do and oh God what if she doesn't like mares and what if other ponies hate us and--" thing. Those aspects are all there, and it's necessary that they be there, but they're more in-depth and they build up as you go through the chapter. Brilliant.
The rest of this chapter is great, too. Dialogue fits, and the characters are written well, especially Dash. Your Zecora stuck out as being written creatively and excellently, but I sorta wish you did more with her. At the same time, though, I think that you put that scene there for a reason, and I think you might have been foreshadowing with AJ being pushy with Dash, and that's all that felt off, so I officially have no bones to pick with you.
Except the universal one, which is, of course...
KEEP WRITING!
* Announcer Voice* What will happen next? Will Rainbow Dash tell Applejack her true feelings? And if she does will RD find herself where many are stranded to this very day? The FRIEND ZONE? Join us next time to find out!
215883
NEXT TIME ON DRAGON BALL-....wait a minute.... blah i want more i wanna know what happens T.T
Rainbow Dash went balls out on that one.
You can doo eeet! You can do eet ALL! NIGHT! LONG!
Okay, perhaps that isn't the best way to get Rainbow's hopes up, but at least I tried.
I love these stories, very well written, not a rushed story, very good grammar, and definitely one of the best fics I've ever read. You're an amazing writer keep up the good work, sir.
Great story, really love this one a lot. Not just the standard "I love you, Ah love you. done." stuff. One minor critique I would add is that when ponies ask AJ or RD about what is wrong/their love life it seems like they suddenly tell everything. I would imagine that it would take a little more convincing to get them to spill such a big secret. Keep up the great work! I absolutely loved the rain scene.
I found the dream scene funny.
Oh how i cannot wait for the new chapter, I'm addicted to this.
202580
just making a point to say in the comments that the position of editor is taken ^_^
i want moar !!!!!
and i got first
woo hoo, Looking forward to the next chapter.
I didn't need to sleep tonight.
Jolly good show!
221553 I see what you did there!
Me neither, not that I have an important test or anything, great story, and no shipping, pure and clean...............nice
I love it!
Awesome new chapter.
I love the innocent feel with this story! Wonderfully done!
Can't wait till the next chapter!
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im currently in the process of editing it so TheRainbowEffect should have it posted by tuesday
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sorry guys i have been sick for a few days ill have the edit done soon
When are they gonna tell Rainbow's family?
275229 You are a genius. Take all of my internets!!!!
275229 Soon enough, good sir.
275229 Who is Rainbow? I only know of a Dew Drop. Are they related? :P
omai...now i really cant wait to edit the next chapter :D
i wonder if she tasted the rainbow when she dyed her mane
279898 if not pinkie did when they went to cloudsdale remember? its spicy
I'm loving this story so far! Keep up the good work!
Woohoo first comment. i am so nervous, what should I say? OH GOD THE PRESSURE IS GETTING TO ME!
But seriously this chapter was cute. I really like how you had go to their secret spot to announce it to their friends. It makes it more of an impact that they were willing to share a place that was only for those two with their friends to show how much they cared about each other and of their opinions.
It does however feel a tad bit rushed. It wouldn't hurt to add a little fluff in there. However that just might be me needing to adjust from reading It Takes a Villages massive chapters which I have speant the last couple of hours reading. Getting off track, this chapter was good and I look forward to the next one. Allons-y!
yes first (i think)
its a nice story and good writing
i am watching you and your awesome fic very closely
Hey, everypony, sorry about the lack of new chapter recently. I've had a lot on my plate and haven't been able to write much lately, but I'm working on it now and will get it done ASAP
its like i know that Midnight Whisper pony hmmmmmm.......
i251.photobucket.com/albums/gg285/draikrider1/3315802_4ca44201a91f4dd90baf5a8900fa5785.png
Weird right? But what are the chances of you actually knowing that? Lets be realistic here Midnight.
Anyways, amazing chapter as always. You are going to have to put the next chapter out soon because I really want to learn more about Dew Drops parents.
Bah, Midnight Whister... Everyone know Midnight Quill is the better pony.
I can't wait till the next update!!! We are going to see Dashie's parents!