• Member Since 10th Jul, 2011
  • offline last seen 17 minutes ago

Aquaman


The campiest of happers.

T
Source

After losing out on first chair cellist in the Manehattan Philharmonic Orchestra to her biggest rival, Octavia tries to console herself with a healthy bout of moping and a strong drink. One drink soon becomes several, though, and her evening of debauchery leads to a long night of frenzied, sordid passion with her best friend Vinyl Scratch. It isn't until she wakes up in the morning with Vinyl's legs wrapped around her that Octavia remembers two very important things: one, she's straight. And two, if the infamously strict conductor of the Philharmonic finds out how unrefined Octavia's social life has become, she could lose her one and only chance at the only dream she's ever had in her life.

This could get a little bit complicated.

Cover art by CouchCrusader, who I swear to God is like fatting me up for slaughter or something with all the custom stuff he does for me.

Half-heartedly edited by NTSTS #dunked

Chapters (1)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 72 )

Oh, Octavia. I hope you kill that sonuvamitch Beauregard.

why is it so popular to have Octavia an alcoholic? she's just as interesting of a fan-character when she's sober.

you need to add romance tags

2522305 Why is it so popular to call someone who gets drunk once an alcoholic? :raritystarry:

Well this here? This is delightful.

I expect big things from you, sir.

This is so well written and enjoyable, well done. Looking forward to more.

Y1
Y1 #7 · May 4th, 2013 · · ·

This feels more like a drama than a comedy. It was well written and all, but I didn't laugh once.

Anyway, this is interesting. Moar.

This ship has sailed, where to now cap'n?

2523307

Eh. It's a dramedy. Or whatever they call it.

This is fantastic. The great thing is, I can't even begin to predict where this is going! Liked and favourite-d. Cannot wait for more!

2525970 A comma? one of these ------> ,

2528375

That was intentional.

Mad Diamond Dog 20/20 ? Oh god ... Please dont let that be a refence to Mad Dog 20/20 Night Train

To be honest I found the humor just a little bit dry, but I did laugh, I like the story so far, and I do think it's well-written. I would love to see where this goes.

Just one non-critical nitpick about the end of this chapter:

Whatever it was that was bugging Octavia, she’d be over it by the end of the week.
And if she wasn’t over it by then, it was going to be one hell of a long one.

Maybe it's just me, but the logic of these two sentences together doesn't quite work. Basically you're saying that the feeling of the length of the week will be determined by its end result. Just feels odd.

And judging by the circumstances and how well Vinyl knows Octavia in this story, I would think she'd realize it was going to be a helluva long week regardless of the outcome.

Romance tag? Anyway I am loving this so far, can't wait for more! :raritystarry:

I find this delicious with some Billy Joel.

That is a depressing story title.

2537244
... the title that's a direct takeoff of the line "it only hurts when I laugh"?

Goddamn, I don't understand this site.

2537632 Nah, it's just me. I find weird things depressing. Teenaged feels and all that.

Story seems incomplete to me.

2542219
Hence the big "incomplete" tag right below the link to the first chapter.

ladies and gentlemen... booze.

Love it, look forward to more.

2542368
Well how are we supposed to crack that code huh?

ahhh, the wonders of booze!

Dis gon be gud!
But that could just be all the booze I drank talkin.

Either way, Favorited for later reading.

This story definitely requires a romance tag.
javascript:smilie(':twilightangry2:');
I seriously can not wait for the next chapter, but don't rush your art! This first chapter is terrific, very descriptive and the flow of the story is just remarkable. Please don't bail out any time soon just let these chapters keep on coming. Definitely am curious how the story will unfold.

I have read quite a bit of Tavi and Scratch tales and this one has to be one of the best, then again I enjoyed most of them anyways xD. Just think of it this way, I should be sleeping right now; got work at 6am and its 2am. Plus, i haven't read any stories for the past 2 months, not because i didn't have the time but really didn't have the urge to read. You have broken my rut and now I just want to keep on reading. This is all thanks to your captivating intro, and which i have to say was genius.

You know what don't put that romance tag on this story, probably would not have started reading it if it did. javascript:smilie(':twilightblush:');

You know this is missing a romance tag. Even EQD post didn't have a shipping tag. And now I am wondering if that was intentionally left out. Maybe it speaks to how things will turn out?

So far, this seems quite interesting. It isn't really "laugh out loud" funny, but there are enough comedic elements to make it good. I specially enjoy the clever word play at certain parts, and the dynamic between your Vinyl and your Octavia, which is extremely amusing. This chapter seems to have been mostly set-up, and I am curious to see where you are gonna take this.

Still, there are some issues. The pacing is a little too slow, not enough to be boring, but enough to be noticeable. There are also some problems with the point of view, with certain parts seeing to be a narration, while others seem to be narrated (as in, it alternated too suddenly between a "personified" narrator and a more abstract one). It worked some times, such as the opening, but also took me out of the story in others, with the "scene change" after they do it being a prime example. They aren't exactly deal breakers, but they are big enough to be noticeable. Still, nice work so far, and thanks for writing it.

2576408
Well duh, that is obvious. But it contains shipping. :trixieshiftright:

2576438
uhm dude, I think you are repeating yourself.

2576478 If it's not a romance story, it doesn't need a romance tag. Simple as that. :facehoof:

2576480
Well that explains the fimfiction part, If romance tag only means that. But it has shipping no? Two characters had sex, and the story is probably going to be about how to handle that and stuff.
So how do you explain the EQD part?

2576496 And? The sex was a mistake.

And, the hell should I know about EQD, I don't really use EQD for finding fics, because I rarely see any that catch my interest.

Mistake or no, it still contains it.
But whatever, I got everything that I need from your answers.

2576510 OK, just remember
Shipping ≠ Romance

This story, it has peaked my interests!

This story sucks balls. That is all.

Comedy tag doesn't belong. This is clearly not a comedy, even if there are a few humorous moments.

2579822
I'm curious about what makes you say that, as it seems to be something I'm hearing from multiple people. Is it a thematic issue, or should I just keep my day job as far as writing funny stuff goes?

2579854

I honestly just don't see any jokes. A comedy doesn't have to be characters just reciting knock knock jokes, but a bit of witty dialogue doesn't make a story a comedy. Octavia being drunk doesn't strike me as particularly comedic.

Could you point out what you thought was comedic? Normally it's a bad idea for an author to explain themselves, but this honestly read like a story that was not intended to be a comedy (as opposed to a story failing to be a comedy).

2579878

Haven't read the story yet, but could be a dramatic comedy, or could follow the original definition of a comedy,

With regards to the comedy tag, it seems like situational comedy to me. Which is to say, funny things happening around serious problems. Like Red vs. Blue.

I think.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!