Iron Will's The Name, Cuddling is His Game
You manage to walk through the threshold of your house before you’re forced to drop to your stomach. Your footstool goes sailing over your head, and then it lands right on your front lawn. Luckily it’s still in one piece.
If it wasn’t for your quick reaction time you would have had a face full of cheap wooden furniture. Looking in the direction it came from you find that you’ve managed to get another guest in your lovely household.
The day prior you were visited by a royal alien pony by the name of Celestia, and you were hoping that’d be the last time you’d have to deal with such a strange occurrence. But, it looks like fate had other plans for you.
Standing in your living room, using your couch, entertainment center, and television as a makeshift barricade, was a half man, half bull creature. A Minotaur if you remember the correct term. Unlike the ones you read in mythology books this one had light blue skin for its upper body, and navy blue fur for the lower half and head.
Regardless of whether or not the color scheme was odd to look at didn’t matter. The Minotaur had your DVD collection and he was ready to throw those.
”Iron Will demands to know who you are!” he bellows before tossing your DVD box set of The Walking Dead at you. Thankfully you catch this one, and you manage set it on a nearby coffee table before having to immediately reach out and grab a few movie cases.
When he finally runs out of disks and cases to throw, Iron Will stops for a few moments. You assume he might be wondering as to why you’re not reacting in the same way as him. At this point the only thing that seems out of place is your rapid heartbeat, and that’s only because your adrenaline is pumping.
After that experience with Celestia, this doesn’t surprise you. Even though you expected to never deal with something like that again, the fact that you are isn’t making you upset. If anything you’re slightly annoyed by his bold and brash attitude. After all, it’s your things he’s throwing at you.
Unlike you though, the poor Minotaur is sweating up a storm. His chest rises and falls quickly as though he’s ran a marathon. Iron Will was probably just getting used to his surroundings when you suddenly decided to come home from the site.
When you move a bit closer his muscles tense. You don’t blame him for reacting this way, he is in a new place, and just like Celestia he’s probably never seen a human before in his life. It’s too bad he isn’t reacting the same way she did. It’d make things so much easier for both of you.
After a minute or two of silently staring each other down, his breathing finally starts to lessen until it becomes regulatory. With a final sigh he seems to relax, and when he does you in turn finally let out the breath you didn’t even know you were holding in. He raises a brow in confusion before setting down the couch cushions he had ready to throw.
”Y-you’re not going to attack Iron Will?” He steps out from around the makeshift barricade, and from there you get a better look. You noticed that he was rather well-built, but from here not only is he a few feet taller, but his muscles appear to be bulging. He’s afraid of you, yet he could crush you like an ant.
”You gave me a good reason to. You turned my home into a warzone,” you irritably state before stepping closer. As you do he in turn backs away. “Stop being irrational, just because you’re in some new place doesn’t mean everything is out to get you. At least Celestia didn’t seem as skittish.”
”Hope for the best, expect the worst. That’s Iron Will’s philosophy,” he says before fully realizing what you just said, “The Princess was here?” You nod.
”Yeah, she came by my place last night. She told me that she needed to rest so she could let her magic build back up. It ended with us cuddling in bed and her using her magic to send herself home in the morning.” This surprisingly causes the Minotaur to chuckle.
”Buddy, if you’re telling the truth, you have no idea how many jealous stallions would be trying to break down your door.”
”From what she tells me it’s the exact opposite. No suitors seem to have the balls to try and court her. Apparently I’m the only male contact she’s had in over a thousand years,” you explain before making your way over to the overturned furniture. “You gonna help me?” Iron Will stands around for a few moments in silence before looking around at the mess his little antics as caused.
”O-of course,” he chuckles nervously, “Let me help you with that couch.” At least he isn’t speaking in the third person anymore. With the two of you working together cleaning up takes no time at all.
While you were cleaning, he made mention that he was a self-help instructor, at least that’s how you interpreted it. In a way he sort of reminded you of a group that came to your school back in your younger years. A smile comes to your lips when you recall them tearing phone books in half and bending metal, you thought that was the coolest thing back then…
Though that smile disappears when he tells you just how he got here. He stepped through what he believed to be a white temporal rift in space. As it turns out that was a few hours ago, he had a little too much to drink and his minotaur buddies dared him to touch it.
When he did he didn’t get a chance to yelp as he was forcibly sucked into it. As far as getting back is concerned he has no idea how he’s going to. The rift isn’t in your living room anymore.
Knowing that there’d be a bit of a media frenzy if you kicked him out, you decided to let him stay, at least for the time being. It’s better for him to stay with you rather than exposing him to the public. You don’t want to gamble on how everyone else would react to finding out Minotaurs exist.
When the last bits of your living room were put back in their proper places, you went back outside in order to retrieve your footstool. Thankfully, none of your neighbors came outside to ask why it was in the middle of your lawn. It would have been rather awkward, especially if they so happened to catch sight of your uninvited guest. That leads you to wonder just how he could have ended up here using a tear in the fabric of space.
You were at least glad he was from the same planet. It’d be pretty accurate to say you were taking a gamble with mentioning Celestia. For all you knew this character may have come from an entirely different dimension. And even if he did come from Celestia’s world there was a chance they could have been enemies. Luckily neither of those was the case.
”It’s too bad none of those stallions have come to me for help, I’d whip em into tip top shape,” Iron Will states while pointing to his chest with a thumb.
”Really, you think you’re that good?” With that bit of unpleasantries out of the way you wipe your hands on your pants and make your way into your kitchen. “Want anything? Water, chips, soda?”
”Of course, I could make any of them fit for dating a princess like her,” he says before putting a hand to his chin in thought, “And water’s fine thank you.” And with that you open your fridge and pull out two bottles of water. After walking back into the living room and tossing him his, you open yours and take a hearty gulp.
While your day at the construction site was nowhere near as demanding as yesterday’s, it was still exhausting. Water is just the thing you need right now, speaking of which showering is a must. A rank smell of sweat and body odor permeates off of you causing you to grimace.
”Listen, Iron Will, I’m gonna grab a quick shower. You go ahead and make yourself at home, but please don’t touch anything. Well, unless you know how a remote works then by all means find something on the tv to watch.” You point to your flatscreen for emphasis.
”S-sure. You know, you’re being rather accommodating human. I figured you would have kicked me out.”
”Yeah, and if I did that the news media would be all over you in a heartbeat. I can see the headlines now,” you shake your head before walking up your stairs.
”Where’s your projector?” he calls before taking a spot on your couch.
”I don't have one. See that black rectangle on my coffee table?”
”Yeah!”
”Pick that up and hit the big red button that says power. Be sure to aim it at the tv, or you’re gonna be staring at a black screen the entire time.”
With your explanation over and done with you can now focus on the task at hand. Your grin returns in full force at the prospect of washing the grime and sweat from your tired body. Perhaps you’ll watch a movie with Iron Will after you’re done?
As you strip out of your clothes and turn the knobs to adjust the heat for your shower, you can’t help but feel surprised at how well you’re taking all of this. You have a minotaur in your house and you haven’t freaked out at the possible repercussions of that.
He told you that he can’t do magic, so his little escapades that got him here have a slim chance of happening again. You have no idea how long you can keep him housed here, and even if you could all it’d take is a family member or a friend visiting to expose him to the rest of the world.
You sigh before stepping into your tub, suddenly the prospect of cleaning yourself doesn’t seem like such a pleasant time. While scrubbing yourself to the point of your skin feeling like it’s being scratched should feel rather good, instead it doesn’t. Neither does the warm water that should be relaxing your still aching muscles.
Regardless, you still lose track of time via daydreaming, but not of an idle fantasy you’d enjoy. In fact, the thought of unwanted publicity assaults your little mental scenario.Flashing lights, cameras, celebrities, future fans, and probably animal control are many things that you’d rather do without.
Though you’re sure Iron Will wouldn’t mind, he’d probably soak up the attention, and he’d probably try to promote his self help teachings to the populace, after he was integrated of course. And by integration you of course mean something that’d probably take years for the poor minotaur. There’s no way he’d be allowed to walk the busy streets so early.
He’d have to be subjected to questioning, a physical, and probably many other unpleasant things before even being considered able to move around in public. If only he could do magic...
Your thoughts are cut off when you hear the sound of a woman moaning in what you think to be the peak of pleasure. Hacking and sputtering soon comes after when you realize Iron Will probably turned to a rather inappropriate channel. It doesn’t help that he turned up the volume.
”God damn it,” you curse before hurriedly washing away the shampoo. Within a minute you’re stepping out of your shower, wrapping your towel around yourself, and running out of the bathroom. You nearly slip and break your neck descending the stairs, but that’s not the problem.
The problem is that there’s a woman on your tv bending in a way that shouldn’t be possible. You don’t know whether to throw something at your tv or yell at Iron Will. So, you decide to do a little of both.
”Iron Will, what the fuck?!” he yells out of shock and fear before turning his head to face you.
”I-I don’t know! I was just scrolling through the channels and your batteries were getting low. I tried to change it but I hit the volume button by mistake! And... maybe Iron Will was sort of curious.”
”So? Get up and turn it off!” you scream before motioning to your tv.
”I don’t know how!”
”Jesus, are you kidding me?!” You walk over and hit the power button on the side. The two of you get one last glimpse of the girl on her knees with her mouth open before it finally shuts off.
”Uh, sorry bro,” he chuckles nervously. His face is alight with blush. “S-so you humans last quite a while. N-none of us can go longer than a minute.”
”I don’t wanna hear about that!” you exclaim. Calm down, get your bearings, and try to speak in a quieter tone. What’s done is done. You sigh while rubbing your temples.“Listen, just, finish up your water. There’s some chips and bread in the kitchen, along with other shit. Get yourself a little something to eat if you’re hungry. If you go upstairs and look in the open closet, you’ll find some pillows and a blanket. You’re on the couch tonight. I’m gonna go lie down. Tomorrow is my day off and I’m sleeping in. We’ll figure something out for you then alright? I may be pissed at you but I’m not gonna leave you high and dry on this planet.”
”C-Can Iron Will turn the tv back on--” he barely gets the question out of his mouth before you snap at him.
”NO YOU CAN’T! YOU LOST TV PRIVILEGES FOR THE NIGHT!” The muscles in the side of your face spasm a bit causing your cheek and eyebrow to twitch. With a proper feeling of anger coursing through your veins you promptly turn around, step past your couch, and walk back up your stairs.
”Th-thank you,” he mutters before wincing at the sound of your door slamming. “W-what is Iron Will gonna do? I’ve got no way out of here... no way home...” he casts a sad gaze over to the half empty bottle of water on your coffee table before sighing.
~~*~~~*~~*~~~*~~*~~*~~~*~~*~~~*~~
Even though you’re furious with Iron Will for something that wasn’t entirely his fault, that doesn’t stop your bed from looking quite inviting. A single breath of air is all it takes for your mood to flip like a switch from rage, to relief.
The prospect of finally getting to sleep on your soft king sized mattress always seemed to take away whatever unpleasant mood you were in. It may have cost quite a bit of money, but it was worth it to feel as though you were sleeping on a cloud every night.
After drying off and putting on a pair of boxers you decide it best to not keep your wonderful bed waiting for you. So, with a goofy grin plastered on your face you crawl under your covers, lie your head upon your pillow, and snuggle in.
Within a few minutes you can feel your consciousness start to ebb away in order to make room for sleep to take over. The last few thoughts that play through your mind are of the possible outcomes of having Iron Will stay with you. Unfortunately, those thoughts lead to rather unpleasant dreams....
~~*~~~*~~*~~~*~~*~~*~~~*~~*~~~*~~
Four hours have passed since you hit the sack. And within that time Iron Will helped himself to a couple of sandwiches and a bag of cheetos. While that would have been fine and dandy with you, the fact that he had gone to sleep shortly after isnt’.
What you don’t know, is that eating before sleep makes the otherwise docile minotaur sleep walk. Within an hour of Iron Will falling asleep he gets up off of your couch and stands there. In his dream he believes himself to be a little calf searching for his mother.
”M-mommy” he mutters before stepping on top of your coffee table. He shuffles forward a few steps, and it’d seem like he’s about to trip and fall, but instead he manages to catch himself and step safely off of your furniture. His head suddenly turns to look at your stairs, a tired smile plays across his lips.
”W-wait for Iron Will mommy.” He lumbers over to your stairs and somehow manages to make it to the top without falling over himself. He sets his close sights on your bedroom door... The loud slamming of your door meeting wood brings you back to reality.
”What the fuck?!” you groggily shout. Before you can utter another word you see a dark figure standing over you.
”Yay, I got you mommy,” Iron Will snickers before climbing into your bed. Your immediate reaction is to try and escape, but a heavily muscled arm reaches out to grab hold of you. A surprised shriek is all that is able to leave you before Iron Will brings you close.
”Dude, let me go!” You try to turn to him, but he’s got you facing away. The tree trunk he’d call his arm has you in an iron grip. Naturally you start to struggle. You kick him, you try to bite, and you even smack the back of your head against his chest.
All you manage out of him is a tired yawn before he nuzzles his muzzle on the top of your head. Your shivering intensifies, you’re completely trapped in his cuddle hold. In a last ditch effort you try to aim for his privates with your foot, but you’re unable to maneuver to that particular spot.
After another five minutes of useless struggling and yelling passes, you realize that there’s no way that you’re going to be getting out of this. The minotaur has you and he doesn’t even know it.
”Iron Will loves you Mom,” he mutters before letting out one final yawn. And with that Iron Will’s little adventure comes to an end. So there you lie, wide awake, feeling a combination of anger, fear, and above all embarrassment...
~~*~~~*~~*~~~*~~*~~*~~~*~~*~~~*~~
You don’t know how you manage it. Maybe it was his steady breathing, or you realizing that you wouldn’t get away anyway, but you somehow get back to sleep.
The next morning comes as a surprise. When you stir you find that Iron Will is no longer in bed with you. Thanking whatever for this turn of events you get out of your bed and start your morning ritual of using your toilet and shaving since you already showered last night.
When you step down your stairs you find that your couch is void of any minotaur. It’s here panic starts to set in. You rush into your kitchen, your laundry room, your pantry, and then back to your living room. There is no Iron Will to be found... but a peculiar note is seen in his stead.
A roughly scribbled message on a single piece of paper... “Dear human, there was another white temporal rift that opened up. Decided to jump into it. If it takes me to Equestria, and if it so happens you find yourself there some day, feel free to throw my name around to get free stuff. I owe ya that much for your hospitality. Iron Will thanks you again. P.s. I am so sorry I have no idea what happened last night. Let’s just uh... forget about that okay? I won’t tell if you won’t.” As soon as you finish you crumple it up and toss it at your tv.
Thank my lucky star that’s over....Hope he didn’t end up in the endless vacuum of space. Now, what’s for breakfast?
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Oooh, do Luna next? Or Spitfire if you have plans for her already....Wait, the entire wonderbolts team! Multi-cuddling ago! Funny stuff man.
> sees an update in favourites:
> sees that it's "Forced Pony Cuddles":
> reads "Iron Will" in the new chapter's title:
i.imgur.com/4bBEXqR.jpg
Well... time to read!
EDIT: I like where this story is going. Keep up the good work!
Oh god I just saw iron wills name and lost my shit
Iron Will does not "cuddle." He headlocks.
...okay...We MUST have Fluttershy visit this guy! They can bond over weird experiences with Iron Will. i.e.
Maybe Bon-Bon next? You know, so Lyra isn't considered a total crackpony for saying she slept with a human the night before.
Damn it! Was about to start shutting-down my laptop and this updated! I need sleep, but the ponies won't let me... P.S. It's 4:30 AM...
Glorious as usual
This is awesome.
"Gotta hug 'em all!"
TWILIGHT NEXT!
Oh god. I saw this on my feed and I'm like ... Ohgod. Ohmagod. Ohmaeffinggod.
Whathaveyoudone
I liked this chapter. It was very clever and quite a lot of parts made me laugh. Can't wait for more
wow never thought iron will would have a mommy complex (not eipus) such a momma's boy funny love it can't wait for the next one haha
oh, Iron Will. You scamp.
Discord should be next.
I wonder if there'll be some deeper story later on. Because the author is setting this up so that something like that would fit in like a correct puzzle piece. Colour me intrigued.
Oooohhhh, Do Luna Next?!
I agree with 2566244, that or twilight
Oh god..... Guess Big Mac might get some cuddles then...
Hell, I'd like to see AJ. Not because it'd be a captivating plot or rich experience. Just cause she's the best pony.
I wantWe need Nurse Redheart in this fic, for the love of Celestia and all that is holyWow... that was wierd... nice
If Soarin' was teleported, the dude would see a pony absolutely raiding the crap outta his fridge and pantry
Perhaps the only two ponies he would really enjoy cuddling with would be the Spa Ponies. He would give them hospitality, and they would give him the best massage of his life after a rough day of work!
Kinda like to see Mayor Mare kick back and relaxin' from the stress of her job
Lol I enjoyed Iron Will looking at T.V and then losing said T.V privileges! Now who's next? That's what I'm waiting for.
dude why do that guy man I admit it was funny but I like to read this for dawwwwww moments not lol ok and do the changling queen next dude
"shortly after isnt’."
apostrophe in the wrong spot.
Brilliant idea to post this on Mother's day, what with Iron Will wanting his mommy to cuddle with. Great chapter dude!
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/252/995/483.png
Sir, you have earned yourself Yes from my collection.
*reaches into pocket and pulls out some lint*
... Looks like I forgot to stock back up... Have a cookie instead. *pulls a cookie of of Pinkie's mane and hands it over*
Oh, and BTW, Applebloom should be next. That chapter would be so full of Dawwww that I'd have to give you a Dawwwwesome award.
That was hilarious
img2.joyreactor.cc/pics/comment/full/mailru-коментарии-тп-солнце-325522.png
2565958
In the minotaur homelands, there is no difference.
Thou shalt do the Lady Dashie at thy leisure.
Really, we need some Dashie in here somewhere.
On another point, like the way you did this chapter. Made it awkward for the both of them, thereby negating all homo-points gained.
ha do chrisalis
Iron-Will being beta?
This is new.
I need some french fries and onion rings because i lost my sides.
2567308 YOU sir have all my yes for making me laugh as much as this chapter xDD
fuck it i motion applejack! cause you know
you can't deny best pony her cuddles xD
spitfire!
2566849
i SECOND THIS, APPLEBLOOM
Chrysalis.
great chapter once again
if a bit akward
also, i want to see some applejack in here
and congratulations on over 1000 upvotes
God, this is just the best kind of hilarious
Iron Will is best pony.
Best cuddles.
2566008 PONYMON GOTTA HUG EM ALL!
I WANNA BE THE VERY BEST LIKE NOONE EVER WAS!
The very concept of this chapter scares me somewhat.
Ok. I'm officially alright with this story now. You are an absurd person, and I'm not even gonna ask you to be ashamed by it. Shine on, you cuddly diamond.