• Member Since 7th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen Nov 8th, 2015

dbzponyninja


E

For the first time since coming to the future Fry actually has a day off from work for once and comes across The Hub while channel surfing at first he just watches shows like Transformers Prime, Transformers Prime Beast Hunters, Dan Vs., Superman The Animated Series, Batman The Animated Series, Batman Beyond and Animaniacs but then he starts watching both My Little Pony Friendship is Magic and Littlest Pet Shop and starts enjoying those shows alot, then after looking up both shows on the internet he finds out that both shows have fandoms and that he has becoming a fan of both shows what will his friends think when they find out about this?

Chapters (7)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 20 )

So I find it hard to believe that my little pony would simply still be around a thousand years from now. Considering though your source material it is workable. You could have there be a my little pony planet, perhaps that's even where the crew went. Could make for a good plot. Next thing is its rather bland. They didn't feel to me that it was actually the characters talking. For example when the professor ( don't capitalize that by the way) tells Fry to do something whether its in his favor or not, it would be in character for him to whine. If it is in his favor maybe right before the scene changes have him realize that. Also keep in mind he Internet is a physical place in Futurama. You could have a whole thousand plus word chapter of him looking it up, maybe he accidentally stumbles upon a site full of cloppers.

Another thing, this story only very loosely fits on this site. It is mainly Futurama, with Fry as a brony. Also I started chapter three and I'm still not seeing plot. If you want plot ideas for ywhatyou could do with this I'd be willing to help.

"Boooooooo!" Everyone booded
Dr. Zoidberg: "Your story is bad and you should feel bad!"
Leela: "Yea! For onec Zoidberg is right!"
Amy: "Yea!"
Fry: "Yea!"
Dr. Zoidberg: "Yay! People are agreeing with me!"
Hermes: "Yea mon! Lets go home. There's a manwich waitting for me."
Bender: "Hey dbzponyninja bite shiny my metal ass ahahahaha. I'll write my own fanfic with blackjacks and hookers you know what forget the blackjack!"
...
...
...
Professor: (snore) "Huh? Wha? Where did everyone go? Aww to hell with it I'm going back to sleep!" (snore)

2514561
See now that's in character. Why am I feeling so nice today, I almost said that seemed a little mean. But that's how to get through to people.

All of you are forgetting that while this story is primarily both Futurama and My Little Pony related it's also Littlest Pet Shop related why is noone talking about the Littlest Pet Shop part of the story?

2516460
Because this is a My Little Pony site and we are more focused on the lack of pony and for those of us that know Futurama, how the characters are not act like themselves.

5 chapters, roughly 1500 total...

The hell mate, it's even a fail from there.

Just a few pointers,

1. I would search for a proofreader or editor for your writing.
2. Reading some guides on plot/characterization/setting would be very useful.*
3. Try to pull out more words, such tiny chapters gives readers no time to be invested in... well anything. 1000 words would be a great place to start.
4. Three different universes in one is never a good idea, too many characters, not enough time given to a single world and it is just confusing.
And 5. Watch a bit more Futurama, write down their traits/common quotes and then take another crack. Only way to go is up, that's what learning is after all.

*Plenty of guides both on Fimfiction and the great world of the internet.

While I'm not saying this is a bad story, I have one complaint: You kinda molested Bender's catchphrase.

While I'm not saying this is a bad story, this is an awful story. Please. If you don't know what you're doing, don't do it.

I know you don't wanna use cuss words but please let bender have his catch phrase! "bite my shinny metal ass" is the most memorable moment in futurama :rainbowkiss:

By Nerevar! You're telling me that you couldn't even manage to write a story that was longer than about 1,300 words (those blog posts disguised as the last three chapters don't count as story)? One chapter should be at least that long- at least!

5418328

those blog posts disguised as the last three chapters don't count as story

Aren't those illegal?

5420019
They aren't illegal. If he was under 1k words without them then they wouldn't count towards length and then it would be illegal, but he skated into the habitable zone just barely.

2516460 Dude, may I point out to you that you've gotten 40 dislikes? Shouldn't that tell you that...well, something is wrong here?
2808155 A sacrilege, I say!

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!