The Private Scrapbook

by Cadabra

Chapter 1: Thank Ya Kindly, Filthy

Chapter 1: Thank Ya Kindly, Filthy

It was only last night that the timberwolves had started howling, signaling the start of another zap apple growing season. It was hard for the Apple grandchildren to sleep that night, not only because of their excitement for the upcoming profitable harvest, but because of Granny Smith running around like a mad old woman with pots and pans strapped to herself. They knew she did this to make enough noise to scare the timberwolves away from the farm, but the noise had a way of traveling through the cotton balls they had crammed in their ears.

While all the commotion kept everypony awake throughout the night, it also caused the town of Ponyville to quickly spread the news of the upcoming zap apple harvest. Everypony would soon be lined up clear across town, eager to take a bite out of the latest goodies that the zap apple harvest would yield, more specifically the delicious zap apple jam that the Apple Family was known for.

Mmmmmmm… Zap Apples…

That morning as Granny Smith helped a groggy Apple Bloom slip into her cute little bunny costume to sing to the water, they saw a familiar pony coming up the walk way with his obnoxious daughter following closely at his heels. With a big grandmotherly smile, Granny Smith waved a costumed hoof in the air in greeting. “Well, howdy doo there, Filthy Rich!” she hollered neighborly. “I’m guessin’ ya heard all ‘bout the good news. We’re gonna have us a right goodin’ of a harvest this season. I can feel it in mah bones, achy as they are and such.”

Filthy Rich couldn’t help smirking at the crazy old mare in the ridiculous bunny costume, wondering how many more harvests she had left in her. “Why that’s excellent news!” he said enthusiastically, putting on his winning businessman smile. “And as usual, I can expect the first hundred jars?”

The ears on Granny Smith's bunny costume bobbed back and forth as she nodded. “'Course ya do, sonny,” she agreed with a bright smile. “Y’all can nab ‘em up, just like every year! I'll get ‘em stacked up and ready to go fer ya, just like we agreed.”

Filthy Rich smiled at the thought of the profit he was looking forward to. “That is spectacular news as always,” he grinned from ear to ear, “but you know, those hundred jars just fly off the shelves at Rich’s Barn Yard Bargains. And with our new location opening up in Trottingham, those hundred jars just won’t last me long enough. What’s say we barter for an increase on that number.”

The goofy smile on Granny Smith’s face faded fast. “What’s that now?” she mumbled, looking suspiciously at the businessman smile plastered on Filthy Rich’s face.

Filthy Rich grabbed the old mare’s bunny ear in his teeth to set her aside from the children. “Let's take a walk, Granny Smith,” he mused. “We’ve got some serious business to discuss, and I don’t know if the fillies need to be within earshot of this one. Besides, Diamond Tiara should probably spend some time with her friend.”

Diamond Tiara shot her father a dirty look as he forced a pair of bunny ears on her head, making her squeal from the fake ears pulling her hair and pinching her scalp. She protested loudly as he scooted her toward the circle of watering cans. “Don’t be stubborn,” he said under his breath, giving her a stern look in an attempt to quit her bickering. “Before long, we’ll be swimming in profits from our new shop in Trottingham. Just do this, okay?”

Apple Bloom and Diamond Tiara watched the two adult ponies walking away, Granny Smith looking slightly uncomfortable as she talked with Filthy Rich. They were both talking too low for either filly to make out anything they were saying.

As soon as the two ponies were out of sight, Diamond Tiara shucked off her embarrassing bunny ears. “Would you look at how ridiculous you look,” she giggled as she took a seat on a hay bale. “I am sooooo glad I don’t have a crazy family to have to worry about, especially with what it takes for yours to turn a profit.”

Apple Bloom grumbled under her breath as she hopped over the watering cans, trying to sing her ABC’s to take her mind off the bully lounging around and watching her work. The zap apple harvest was important to her family, and listening to a spoiled débutant's teasing wasn't making her hard work any easier.

Diamond Tiara laughed all the more at the attempt to ignore. “You know, with everything going so well with my daddy’s new store opening, I wouldn’t be surprised if we own this dump by years end! Wouldn’t that be something!”

Knocking over one of the watering cans in a misstep, Apple Bloom shot the pink filly a sour look. “That ain’t so!” she hollered, trying to look as threatening as she could, which looked more ridiculous than she'd intended in her little blue bunny suit. “This here’s our home! What right have ya got fer sayin’ somethin’ so horrible?”

Diamond Tiara hopped triumphantly off of the hay bale, proud to have gotten under Apple Bloom’s skin. “My Great Uncle, Fairly Rich, says so, and he owns the Ponyville Building and Loan that holds the deed to this farm,” she cavalierly replied, staring haughtily down her nose at her costumed companion. “After all, he handles all your family’s accounts, and have you seen how much debt you all are in? I mean, come on, not everypony in town has a fourth mortgage on their property. We’ve practically got you all by the tails!”

Not understanding the first thing about investments or banking beyond her piggy bank, all Apple Bloom could do is leer back at Diamond Tiara. “Well… oh yeah!” she warbled, trying to think of a good response. “Well, if it weren’t fer our apples, y’all wouldn’t be makin’ so much money! Y’all need us!”

Flicking her tail in Apple Bloom’s face, Diamond Tiara turned away and laughed triumphantly. “You really think you’re the only family we profit off of?” she chuckled. “We have distributors all over Equestria! You’re not the only bumpkin bunch we make a bundle off of. Get over yourself, blank flank!”

Unable to take the tormenting any longer, Apple Bloom lunged out with a vengeance for the bully. “Take that back, ya filthy liar!” she hollered as she dove for Diamond Tiara, fixing to throttle her.

Stepping aside strategically quickly, Diamond Tiara watched her angry adversary face plant into a row of watering cans, the water making a little mud puddle around Apple Bloom. “Why should I, Mud Bloom?” she insulted, kicking up a mud pie in Apple Bloom’s face. “Why don't you ask that crazy old coot? Make her show you the accounting paperwork and see for yourself!”

Before Apple Bloom could try to strike again, Big Macintosh picked her up by the scruff of the neck. “Lemme go!” she hollered in frustration, throwing muddy hooves in the air willy nilly.

Big Macintosh shook his head gently not only to add to the ‘nope’ he uttered, but also to rock his sister and calm her down.

Diamond Tiara stuck out her tongue from behind the safe distance Applejack made between them. “I’m not lying,” she said defensively. “You two know all about the debt your family owes my daddy, don’t you?”

Applejack and Big Macintosh’s expressions went from defensive to deflated at the mention of the debts. It was a sore subject that they had to deal with ever since their parents had passed away, and being reminded of the struggles that they faced without their parents tended to hurt.

Applejack looked sternly down at Diamond Tiara to quiet her torments. “Y’all better watch yer mouth ‘round these here parts,” she cautioned. “We know we’re owin’, but we done been workin’ our hind quarters to the tail bone to get y’all paid off. And we’ve been making some right profits here of late, so don’t go pokin’ fun where it don’t belong!”

Setting his calmed sister down, Big Macintosh added a firm ‘eeyup’ to the argument.

Apple Bloom watched as her grandmother and Diamond Tiara’s father came back from their walk, noticing Granny Smith’s head hanging down. Filthy Rich's expression was just the opposite. He had a look of pure triumph on his face, smiling broadly as he put a front leg around Granny Smith's shoulders. “I’m glad we have a deal!” he bellowed proudly. “We’ll keep this here between the two of us, and I’ll work everything out in the accounting books.”

Seeing her grandchildren’s concerned looks, Granny Smith put on an obviously fake smile. “Oh, uh, why thank ya kindly, Filthy!” she exclaimed as loudly as she could, putting on a most obviously fake performance as she trotted to the huge cooking pot laying sideways in the yard.

Smirking at the silly old woman he’d made a deal with, Filthy Rich joined her by the large cooking pot. “Uh, I prefer Mr. Rich,” he said as he picked up a wooden spoon in his mouth.

Glad to be sticking her head in the pot to avoid looking at her family, Granny Smith muttered under her breath, “I meant what I said, ya filthy varmint.”

Getting a smile out of the silly defensive remark, Filthy Rich struck the pot with the wooden spoon. He didn’t understand this odd ritual in the zap apple harvest, but it sure was a satisfying way to seal the deal.

Comments

[Tiaa OwO]

Mysterious . . . and a lil' funny

[MonsterousKat]

In the first chapter, I can see no mistakes. Then again, my eye is barely trained, but still. It was an enjoyable read so far, and I'm more than eager to read the rest!

[David Brony]

Bale, as in a bale of hay, is spelled the way I have here.
"Bail" is used when referring to expelling water from a ship or to drop away from something.

That's just me picking nits. It seems like a nice read so far.

[Lovinlife]

Things That I Liked:
1. You did a very good job with setting up tension, especially here:

“Apple Bloom watched as her grandmother and Diamond Tiara’s father came back from their walk, noticing Granny Smith’s head hanging down. Filthy Rich's expression was just the opposite. He had a look of pure triumph on his face, smiling broadly as he put a front leg around Granny Smith's shoulders.”

It sets a pretty good hook for readers to fall into to continue reading.

Comments:
1.

“Diamond Tiara shot her father a dirty look as he forced a pair of bunny ears on her head, making her squeal from the fake ears pulling her hair and pinching her scalp.”

I’m thinking that this is showing some foreshadowing for Diamond, but I could just be over analyzing this. Oh well.
2. I see that that you’re going to be going with the canon personalities of the characters, just try not to tweak this too much too fast for character development reasons if CD is going to be occurring in this story.

All-In-All:
This was a nice and subtle beginning to this story and I’m hoping for a good run. It did catch my attention very well and I’m looking forward to reading it. The only real complaint I could find in this was how Diamond could know all about the Apple’s finances, but this may be explained later on so I’m not too worried about it. It was fun and interesting, and not much else to say that hasn’t already been said.

Score:
I’ll give this a 9.5/10.

[porcelainpony]

I meant what I said, ya filthy varmint