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Jul
21st
2020

The Stars Revolt: Males · 2:31am Jul 21st, 2020

After a long day's work on the Apple farm, Shepherd and Big Mac head off to a little part of the orchard. Applebloom watches them go and looks up at her big sister.

Applebloom: "Hey sis. What do stallions do after work anyway? Ain'tcha ever wondered?"

Applejack: "Ah know jest what they're talkin' about Applebloom, and it ain't nothin' fer a filly like you to hear!"

Applebloom: "But-!"

Applejack: "But nothin'!"

Applebloom: "Awwww...!"

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Feb
24th
2020

The Stars Revolt: With Apologies to Mr. Python · 5:46pm Feb 24th, 2020

Andrew Shepherd, sole human in Equestria, was doing some work on a mare's boiler when the Cutie Mark Crusaders trooped up with a question. He looked over at them with a raised eyebrow.

Shepherd: "Huh? What do you mean 'who raises and lowers the sun on my world'?"

Applebloom: "Well, who does?"

Scootaloo: "We have a school report due on the Princesses, and so we thought maybe writing about alien princesses would get us an A!"

Sweetie Belle: "Which we really need!"

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Feb
24th
2020

The Stars Revolt: Why Me? · 6:10pm Feb 24th, 2020

Shepherd: "Why did I end up here and not someone more qualified to analyze all this magic stuff? Like Neil deGrassi Tyson? Or Michio Kaku? Or Michael Collins?"

Twilight: "Who?"

Shepherd: "He was the third astronaut on Apollo 11."

Dash: "The guy who didn't land on the moon? Why him?"

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Feb
26th
2020

The Stars Revolt: Bouncing Baby 1 · 5:06pm Feb 26th, 2020

Andrew Shepherd, the only human in Equestria, was sitting at an outdoor cafe waiting for his marefriend to trot up. And trot up she did, looking nervous and anxious and worried.

Shepherd: "Hm? Twilight, what's wrong?"

Twilight: "Um... Er... Remember when I said that our species were incompatible and we couldn't conceive?"

Shepherd: "... Yes?"

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Feb
7th
2020

The Stars Revolt! Archives 1 · 6:31am Feb 7th, 2020

Shepherd was rummaging around the ancient human libraries, helping the Pony scholars to categorize much of what had been incomprehensible to the alien equines. He was writing down notes on a notepad as he went from storage room to storage room.

Shepherd: "Okay... Door 117-Gamma. What do you have?"

He entered the room. Inside was a stone. Embedded in this was a sword.

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Jul
1st
2020

The Stars Revolt: Trap · 1:43am Jul 1st, 2020

Dash: "I bet you that you can't catch Twilight with a book."

Shepherd: "I... Why?"

Dash: "Because it would be funny."

Shepherd: "And the stakes?"

Dash: "... Twenty bits."

Shepherd: "You're on."

And so...

Shepherd: "Hmmm... I need to be really diabolical about this..."

He puts a book entitled "DON'T READ THIS BOOK" under a box held up by a stick

And hides

And waits

Dash: Hiding with him "She won't fall for it."

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Feb
7th
2020

The Stars Revolt! Archives 2 · 10:46pm Feb 7th, 2020

In the Ancient Human Archives...

Twilight: "You know, you really overreacted. It's just a sword. It doesn't carry any more meaning than you assign it."

Shepherd: "This from the alicorn princess! You have no idea what that stupid thing could do! It'll make me grow a beard!"

Twilight: "What's wrong with a beard? I think you'd look good with it."

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Mar
10th
2020

The Stars Revolt: Bouncing Baby 2 · 3:27pm Mar 10th, 2020

After Shepherd had managed to recover from his fainting spell, he began hugging Twilight tightly.

Shepherd: "I'm-We're-We're gonna be-We're pregnant!"

Twilight: "Y-yes! Yes we are!"

Shepherd: "Holy crap! Holy... Wow... We're... How?!"

Dash: "Don't you two know how sex works? Sheesh!"

Shepherd: "I didn't mean that! I meant-How do our genetics work?!"

Twilight: "Well, um... I'm still working on that. I did ask Princess Celestia."

Shepherd: "And?"

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Jan
23rd
2020

The Stars Revolt! Luna Love · 3:56pm Jan 23rd, 2020

*Andrew Shepherd was sitting with Princess Luna in Golden Oaks library, as they drank tea and sat in awkward silence*

Shepherd: "Uh... So..."

Luna: "... We understand if you still fear us, Shepherd."

Shepherd: "Fear? No, no, nothing like that. I will admit I'm... Wary, but I'm getting over it. After all, it wasn't your fault."

Luna: *sighs* "That is what everyone tells me. But it is difficult to separate yourself from the monster you became, after so long."

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Feb
8th
2020

The Stars Revolt! Archives 3 · 9:42pm Feb 8th, 2020

In the Human Archives, Shepherd is again, against his better judgement, helping the Ponies understand human culture. Today's artifact isn't ancient or mystical looking at all, to Shepherd's eyes...

Twilight: "I mean, it's so bright and garish and it shines! And it came with this magic staff! Did it belong to a wizard from your world?"

Shepherd: *laughing* "Not likely! No, see, this is..." *He turns the clothing in his hands and laughs some more* "Oh my God! It's a Dolemite suit!"

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Feb
9th
2020

The Stars Revolt: Earth Females · 9:53pm Feb 9th, 2020

Celestia has gathered the Main 6 and her sister in a private meeting, leaving Shepherd to just wait around, doodling in a notebook. At last the doors open, and Shepherd looks up.

Shepherd: "Hey girls. What was the meeting ab-GAH!"

He is caught in a massive seven pony hug.

Dash: "How did you survive?!"

Fluttershy: "You poor thing!"

Rarity: "Those beasts!"

Shepherd: "I... What?!"

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Dec
26th
2019

The Stars Revolt: Fanfiction · 6:47pm Dec 26th, 2019

Shepherd: "Dash? I'm picking up a theme with your Daring Do fanfics."

Dash: "That they're all awesome and amazing?"

Shepherd: "... Nooo. Try again."

Dash: "That they're all awesome?"

Shepherd: "No."

Dash: "Good?"

Shepherd: "No."

Dash: "Okay?"

Shepherd: "No."

Dash: "Readable?!"

Shepherd: "Not even a little. No, what I noticed was that you reach a scene promising sex and then you just have the characters hugging a lot before falling asleep."

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Mar
22nd
2020

The Stars Revolt: Bouncing Baby 3 · 4:18pm Mar 22nd, 2020

After all of this, Shepherd is finally feeling much more steady. He and Twilight are cuddled up in her castle on a couch.

Shepherd: "So... It feels a bit rushed... And not very romantic, but-Will you marry me?"

Twilight: *giggles dorkily* "I-I will!"

Shepherd: *kisses her* "Mmm... Wow. I feel a lot less terrified now that I've asked."

Twilight: "Well I was going to insist on it. I mean, you have no idea how hard my mom's been riding me about-"

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Apr
23rd
2020

Proposals · 1:23am Apr 23rd, 2020

*It is night. Andrew and Fluttershy are sitting in a tree, gazing up at the gorgeous starry sky*

Andrew: It's gorgeous...

Fluttershy: *sighs* Y-Yes... I was afraid of the night when I was little.

Andrew: Me too, you know. When I couldn't get back to sleep late at night I'd wander my house because I was too afraid to stay in my room all by myself.

Fluttershy: *She nuzzles him* Mm... I would have gone with you. Then we wouldn't have been afraid... *She smiled*

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Dec
22nd
2019

The Stars Revolt: Fanart! · 4:41pm Dec 22nd, 2019

Hooray! I got fanart by the wonderful Sipioc!

Just wanted to show it off.

Mar
15th
2020

Pinkie Pie Day · 6:46am Mar 15th, 2020

Pinkie Pie: "SHEPHERD!"

Shepherd: "ACK! How did you get into my closet?"

Pinkie Pie: "I snuck in!"

Shepherd: "I locked my doors and windows."

Pinkie Pie: "I picked the lock!"

Shepherd: "And I put a baby gate on the stairs."

Pinkie Pie: "That was fun to get around!"

Shepherd: "Okay... And now onto the better question: WHY did you get into my closet?"

Pinkie Pie: "To surprise you, silly!" *Blows a party horn*

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Dec
23rd
2019

The Stars Revolt! "Oblivious" Shepherd 1 · 3:14pm Dec 23rd, 2019

Shepherd wakes up to a beautiful new day... And a cute pony cuddling up against him in bed. He sighs and rubs behind Fluttershy's ears.

Shepherd: "Fluttershy... Fluttershy...? It's time to get up."

Fluttershy: "Mmmph... Oh! Oh my... I... It happened again, didn't it?" *Blushes*

Shepherd: "It's okay Fluttershy. I actually like you cuddling with me. It helps me sleep." *Smiles* "If you're lonely, you just have to say so."

Fluttershy: "R-Really?"

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Dec
26th
2019

Hands: Mission to the Crystal Empire · 2:14am Dec 26th, 2019

At Canterlot Castle... The other Mane 6, Spike and Shepherd are waiting outside the double doors to the Throne Room. Twilight soon emerges, looking shaken.

Shepherd: "... Sweetie? What's wrong? What's the test?"

Twilight: "... We're going to the Crystal Empire, to face an evil undead unicorn king, and lift his curse from the kingdom."

Shepherd: "... How did I know it was something like that? So... We're going in heavy and hard I presume?"

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Feb
1st
2020

The Stars Revolt: Friendship Lessons · 10:48pm Feb 1st, 2020

Twilight: "What is one way to be friendly to other beings?"

Shepherd: "Don't kill them."

Twilight: "That was not what I was going for and is an extremely low bar to set but I'll allow it."

Shepherd: "Literally the first thing I met when I got here tried to kill and eat me. That's pretty much the human experience before we became dominant predators, actually."

Twilight: "Buuut you still made friends to overcome these obstacles, right?"

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Nov
30th
2019

Hands: The Stars Revolt! Part 2 · 4:03pm Nov 30th, 2019

Deep in the Everfree Forest, in the ancient ruins of the Castle of the Two Sisters, Shepherd was being held against his will and demanded to do the most unholy things to his new "Mistress".

Namely... Give her belly rubs and emotionally validate her.

Shepherd: *Sighs as he keeps rubbing the happy Nightmare Moon's belly, as she lounges in his lap* "Who's a good destroyer of worlds? Who's sooo much better than her sister?"

Nightmare Moon: "ME! I AM! YESSSSS~!"

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