Fuzz is the dumb.

Oops, I guess?

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BEANIS IS THE PALLIATIVE

TSmall Beanis Owners

• Equestria Girls

The rise of farm-to-bedroom, locally sourced, vegan, organic marital aids!

• Sex
• Sunset Shimmer
• Sci-Twi

MrNumbers · 4k words  ·  175  33 · 2.5k views

Possibly the most fun I've had writing anything in a long time.

Understanding of the Beanis cinematic universe is not a prerequisite, but will possibly improve your reading experience. Alternatively, taking all of this out of context might enhance it even more. I don't know. Just... enjoy.

Welcome to the final phase of the Beanis Cinematic Universe.

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Behold! I have pulled the Beanis Cinematic Universe from the grave after what was apparently a very long writing hiatus!

You know what they say — write what yo know — and I know stupid.

For your viewing pleasure:

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I’m kind of sorry.

Hey guys.

I realize there haven't been any recent updates to Consequences. Rest assured, I do know exactly where the story is going from here. We are, in fact, closing in on the end of Act 2 and moving into Act 3. But I'm still working on the transition between the two and I just haven't felt like anything I've written for it has been good enough.

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You know how this goes. It's not quite done yet, but I'll have it ready by tonight.

Stay beany.
-Fuzz

There’s a beanis shaped hole in my brain that’ll never fill up.

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So yeah, if you follow me here, you've probably noticed that my last three posted stories are all set in the highly deranged, but oddly compelling Beanis Cinematic Universe. If you haven't read these stories and like highly silly absurd sex comedy, you should do so. Despite the main... (tries not to say "thrust." Fails.) thrust of the story, it's not clop, and any "on-screen" sexual shenanigans are done more for comedy

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In an effort to get things moving on Phase 3 of the Beanis Cinematic Universe, I am suspending this week's work on Consequences in order to finish a BCU story needed to set things up for Phase 3 by this weekend.

Consequences updates will continue next week as normal. Sorry for the delay.

Another year, another Bronycon!  I've been going since at least 2013, which makes 6 Bronycons for me.

6 Bronycons.  Man. Has it been that long?  What have I accomplished in 6 years?

Other than writing pony stories and blog posts, not much.  There's a point during every convention where I begin to wonder: What am I doing here?  Shouldn't I be strangling my soul slowly with a 9-5 job to support a couple of kids?

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If the idea of SciTwi making a penis out of bean paste doesn't interest you, you can skip this blog.

If it does, read on below!

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So, as you may or may not know, me and the Beanis gang had a private author’s server for discussing beanis stuff and general bullshitting. I’d bee thinking about opening it to the public, but wasn’t sure if anyone would want to join.

Then one person asked to join and I polled a few of the authors to see if they’d be okay with hosting crazy people.

They deal with me, so of course they were fine with it.

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One day ahead of schedule, I have managed to write over 50,000 words in the month of November.

It's a hell of an achievement, and congratulations to any other authors out there who pulled it off. I found it a lot easier to get through this year than I did last time.

More importantly than just sheer word count, however,

The first draft of Voyagers is finally complete

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I’m guessing a good portion of you have already read it, but for those who haven’t, I have a new story set in the Beanisverse that I think people might enjoy without having to do previous fic research. Either way, I think you guys will like it.

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Also I think I broke Fuzzy’s brain with this story. Along with several other brains. Anyway, if you like sexual humor, you might enjoy this fic.

I'm legit shocked. But now the editing process starts.

Stay engaged.
-Fuzz

EDIT: I just realized that it's after 9 a.m. I should have been in bed 9 hours ago.

So I’m sitting there at 99 stories, and I was stuck. I wanted it to be impactful.

Meaningful. I wanted it to knock people’s socks off because you know it’s my hundredth story.

So I’m sitting there paralyzed not writing anything because I wanted it to be perfect. Which it turns out is a bad idea because then you don’t get anything done at all.

So in the end I wrote something that I wanted to write. Screw the majesty, I’m in the fic business for fun.

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I realized I hadn't really posted a blog in a while and figured it was time for an update.

So, I've been working on another BCU fic which I'm trying to get done because it may kick off Phase 3 (Maybe. It depends on which one of us authors gets our story done first). After that, "Consequences" will resume in earnest and get back on schedule. I finally feel able to take this on after the 20 year friendship I mentioned elsewhere self-destructed.

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So, I've been fooling around with the Fifteen.ai and now that Rarity is an option, I decided to try out one of her iconic lines from Sunset Sexytimes:

Rarity wants to shop from the discount bin.

Also, for the Beanis-minded, Twilight has a few things to say.

Twilight introduces herself.

I'm going to write a Majin Syeekoh fic.

Some of you may be aware that Majin "Goddamnit" Syeekoh just released the sequel to his fic about magical bean paste-based penises. I even made some "fanart" for it, back in the day. But see, I had this silly idea about continuing the epic of the Beanis, developing this world where Twilight made magical bean dicks, and now I have a whole lot of new canon to incorporate thanks to Majin "Inconsiderate Ass" Syeekoh.

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