Hey everyone. It’s about time I say this. Please read the entire thing.

I’ve.... haven’t been feeling like myself lately. And it’s been getting in the way of things, like Fimfiction.

I know I promised updates for A roof over your head, but.....I decided something. I’m not gonna work on any of my old story’s.

Yup. New day same life will still be getting updates, but Best friends have consequences..... I might need a helper on that one.

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I've been on and off here for a while, leaving reviews here and there. Pretty standard stuff. But I feel a bit unsatisfied. Not because of anything that you guys have been doing, in fact, that's the only thing keeping any of these projects alive.

I'm disappointed in myself.

I've made promises, and I know that this is just a silly website dedicated to stories of ponies, but I haven't kept up with any of them.

For example:
1. Canceled my self-insert because I didn't like it.

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I am writing this from bed. I normally don't do things like this, but I feel the need to make an exception.

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Sometimes I just want things to be alright. Sometimes I just want things to be simple. Sometimes I just want to do what's right. Sometimes we all make mistakes. Sometimes we all get a bit mad.

And sometimes I just want it to all to stop.

I'm sorry, but I'm feeling pretty fucking pissed off right now, and I need to vent somewhere before I end up going Krakatoa on someone.

I'm getting sick to the back fucking teeth of my father's attitude with me sometimes. Most of the time, he's a real stand-up guy. He's witty, intelligent, and always willing to listen. Couldn't ask for a better dad. But sometimes, he is just plain insufferable.

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before I start I wanted to say this blog post will be about two things.The first being my feelings on certain matters of myself and why I have not uploaded anything yet, and the second being My plans and my intentions on making on this Account

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Just got to thinking about Thanksgiving, earlier today.

My only visitors were a Neighbor and my aunt, both of which just kind of poked in for a few moments.

It was ok, I'm not a real fan of that month anyways.

Just reminds me of my mom passing.

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You remember when Thanksgiving used to be fun? When your Social Problems teachers weren't saying that the Pilgrims were "freaks that the Native Americans didn't know should have been thrown out"...when half of the hashtag page on Twitter wasn't more stuff about Trump...and when people actually waited until it was over to start decorating for Christmas.

Man, I miss those days.

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I really need to write, and I intended to do so, today, at the time of going to bed last night. But things occurred, and now I am in a rather crappy mood and have lost interest in doing so.

It sucks, because I’m well aware that my deadline for getting the next chapter posted is rapidly approaching. I hate working to a deadline, it stresses me out and can really kill my mood. I’m sorry, I don’t really know what I’m doing except venting.

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Do you ever have those days when you see your favorite character paired up with another you hate? And you can't help but feel this... seething burning hatred flaring up in your chest despite the story or whatever being rather innocent and even good in terms of quality and content?

I get that a lot, I hate it.

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I know this happens a lot and wanted to explain what I feel my issue is and it all connects to my depression. because I've had it for a long time untreated it has really muddled my interest in a lot of things which makes it very hard to wanna indulge in my own ideas since I can't really feel much from them anymore along with the fact I have a wandering mind because I love so many different fandoms my brain can shift to another one very fast if I get new inspiration elsewhere and things stop

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August has not been a good month for me, despite the fact I turned 25 on the 1st.

In the span of this month, I have lost a friend from middleschool to his own hand, and I have lost my grandfather this morning (August 26th).

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Registered for 10th grade just a couple days ago and I'm feeling semi-unconfident about it. I was in online school for my freshman year and worse my schedule this year is all over the place and it's a REALLY big school compared to what I used to go to, and there's so many halls and students and it's just really overwhelming.

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I want to write

I need to write

I find it hard to write

Why is it so hard to write? It used to be easy before

fuuuuuuuck

what do I do

I like to write stories, yet at the same time it drives me crazy. Especially when other people actually like what I write.

It's a bit of a contradiction. Because I write to, hopefully, entertain people. And it feels good when it does. But at the same time it's terrifying. Because if people like it, then they will expect you to keep a certain standard in your work. Which is hard to maintain for an amateur like myself.

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I just needed to vent.

Now I understand that you are upset. No wait... Let me correct. You're pissed. The effect of your mind resists my rythme right now but you need to listen. I'm not going to apologize again for changing. Its as if my body was rearranging and won't let me be innocent enough to know right from wrong. Come on. We all did some stupid shit. We sit on our ass all day and play online games that mame our brain and grain our energy. We strip to our skin and run about thin, so bony and light, we think we

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Fimfiction: *Exists*

Depraved Pornography: *At top of feature box*

Me: *Publishes E-rated story*

Commenters: "I think the fact that you joked about Pinkie Pie hugging Anon too tightly is DISGUSTING and a GROSS depreciation of bodily autonomy as a value."

kinda blipped out of existence for a second there; sorry for the disappearance

a few weeks ago I had a seizure -- I am completely fine (I got to go home that night, don't worry!!) but it meant I had to stop taking the meds I've been taking as antidepressants and adhd treatment for a few years cold-turkey ... so I've been a bit of a mess ^-^'

things are regaining some semblance of normalcy now now I just need to find a new psychiatrist lol

Not having a great couple days like the concert was awesome and the greatest thing ever.

But seriously how do I block someone from texting me cause I keep getting a text from a number that seems like the person thinks I'm their mom and I have no idea what to do about that.

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