I wonder if people are going to hate me... even more, once they find out that I'm probably Cozy Glow's father...

What's with all the talk of variously colored pills?
I say the only good pill is the pill, that keeps your secret relationship a secret. Birth Control!

Mom: WHY IS MY DAUGHTER PREGNANT?!
Son: A miracle? Like Jesus?
Dad: WHO'S THE FATHER?!
*Girl nervously glances at her brother*
Daughter: God?

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GUYS DREAMS DO COME TRUE! I JUST FOUND PINEAPPLE FRUIT CUPS IN THE BASEMENT! GUESS WHO'S CHOWING DOWN ON THOSE LITTLE SHITS! MM YEAH THAT'S RIGHT I'M GOING TO EAT ONE NOW AND ONE AT LUNCH TOMORROW! IF I WANT TO SNACK ON JUNK FOOD TOO BAD I'M GONNA BE EATING THOSE FRUIT CUPS AND SLURPING THAT JUICE IMMA MAKE DAMN SURE THAT MY GENITAL SECRETIONS TASTE LIKE CANDY THIS IS A SIGN FROM THE GODS

I sincerely wish you all a happy and Holy Christmas, and I hope you and yours are all doing well with many happy returns for the new year and beyond.

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