Crossovers 7,362 members · 10,942 stories
Comments ( 8 )
  • Viewing 1 - 50 of 8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G5qNOKaHHIg
There are a number of crossovers with Dust: An Elysian Tale on this site. They all have the same problem — all but 2 stopped after the 1st chapter, the most persistent author kept publishing until 5. The problem seems to be that the writers had written chapter 1, but didn't quite think in which direction to continue. I've partially written 4 chapters, I know the ending I want, but I'm out of ideas for the middle and further and I need your help. What trouble would a swordsman-turned-Earth pony, a winged vixen sidekick and a talking sword stir if they end up in Crystal Empire some 5 years after season 6?

I did ask this question in 2 other groups:
http://www.fimfiction.net/group/208149/dust-an-elysian-tail-bronies/thread/293082/is-this-forum-alive-can-you-help-with-a-dust-story
http://www.fimfiction.net/group/207400/dust-an-elysian-tail/thread/293080/anybody-here-wanna-help
I posted the brief outline there, but don't want to spam the text everywhere, unless moderators demand it..

5680676

Dust finds a trap laid by Sombra and activates it on accident leading him to be trapped in a nightmare.

Dust goes to the crystal library to look for a lead and instead finds an outer point of an incomplete temperature moderation spell, further searching leads to the discovery that the spell circles the entire empire. Activating it could help the crystal empire with its weather problem, but it's so large that if something goes wrong the consequences could be disastrous.

Dust tries to help the ponies by harvesting food and learns that crystal berries can indeed break teeth if not prepared properly.

Dust goes to the palace and stumbles across a tomb for royalty and learns that Sombra wasn't the only royal with a will powerful enough to defy death. Commence chase scene similar to the one in game as Dust tries to outrun an angry royal spirit.

Pm me tomorrow and I'll probably have some more ideas.

5680676 It is a usual problem with a fic. You know how start it and end it. But don't know what put to the middle.

Perhaps King Sombra's worshipper cult planning resurrect their old master.
King Sombra must be have a loyal followers in his court during his reign. When King Sombra was banished, his followers went into hiding.

5681245

Dust finds a trap laid by Sombra and activates it on accident leading him to be trapped in a nightmare.

What kind of nightmare do you have in mind?
Jin and Cassius repeatedly killing each other?
General Gaius saying "Time to kill ponies!"?
King Sombra saying "Time to kill Warmbloods!"?
Sombra turning into Gaius and saying "Did you think I'd die that easily? Now, prove that you are still my friend and kill them all!"?
Ginger saying "Jin is dead, and get lost, murderer!"?
Shining Armor telling him to drown himself in a volcano?
Dust wandering the empty Crystal Empire, because all ponies ran away from him?
Fuse saying "You are a freak! An outcast! Just like me. Be my friend and help me burn them!"?

finds an outer point of an incomplete temperature moderation spell

In its present state it requires a lot of pony blood to function properly. Even Sombra didn't want to use it. He kept it for emergency, hoping to fix it someday.

Dust tries to help the ponies by harvesting food

Hm...
After Dust and Fidget tried to improve Sombra's heating spell (using stored sunlight instead of blood) and almost set the valley on fire, Starburst politely but firmly asked them to stay away from the library until things cool down. So that they won't cause another auto-excitation cascade. Ahrah backed him up.
With a week of nothing to do Dust decided to visit the produce market, where he saw many "Help wanted" signs. The recent bramble infestation destroyed much of the crops, but a few days later everything is growing like mad and farmers need all the help they can get gathering the sudden wealth. Since he had little experience with agriculture back in Falana, he decides to help with something entirely alien to him — crystal berries.
(Were they mentioned anywhere, or did you make them up?)
A busy day where nothing tries to kill him or explode/burn/impale is a welcome change of pace. Practising pony magic is also welcome. Unfortunately Dust is still learning finer control of his new abilities and tears off some green berries. The farmer finds the result unacceptable, but allows Dust to eat what he gathered. The berries taste excellent, the perfect combination of sweet and sour with the right amount of crunchiness. Only Fidget complains some berries are too hard to bite.
Then Dust feels the unpleasant crackle of his teeth and sharp pain.
A visit to a local doctor proves futile. He removes the pain and schedules Dust for making artificial teeth, but knows nothing about restoring teeth and suggests searching in Canterlot.
Fidget asks why don't his teeth regrow back, like they did several times when he got maced in the face. Ahrah gives a wordy explanation why didn't Dust's rings travel with him. Fidget suggests asking Haley to make another, since she still has the blueprint.
After adjusting the blueprint for Dust's hoof and some chaotic search for ingredients (Dust does have Shining's gratitude, but doesn't want to press on his hospitality too much) Dust finally gets the cure for his teeth.

Sombra wasn't the only royal with a will powerful enough to defy death.

Perhaps, it mistook Dust for Sombra?

Commence chase scene similar to the one in game as Dust tries to outrun an angry royal spirit.

Those look much better on video than as text.

5681414 I'm going with the assumption no pony remembers what life was under Sombra. (Save for Celestia and Luna, but they lived far away and only bothered to preserve the vital information.) They only have a vague feeling that it was very bad.

But it can work the other way. Dust gets occasional glimpses of the past. He may blurt something about someone being Sombra's loyal follower and even where to find the proof. The accused would know nothing about that and be as shocked as everybody else.

5681463

How about the nightmare being Dust walking around a completely empty empire because they failed to find a solution to the weather problem, or perhaps finding a creature that was controlling (maybe subtly influencing) Sombra's actions.

Dust could have a disagreement with a guard which leads to a fight in which Dust realizes that he doesn't have a non-lethal fighting style. Commence learning montage with the guard in non-lethal fighting...

I'll try to think of some more ideas later.

5681907

How about the nightmare being Dust walking around a completely empty empire because they failed to find a solution to the weather problem

The one, who tells him, should be Flurry dying from hypothermia.

finding a creature that was controlling (maybe subtly influencing) Sombra's actions.

That was my intention from the start. It happened fairly late, and Sombra would not have fallen to it if he wasn't such an insufferable genius and heeded his assistants' warnings. Maybe Crystal Heart killed it with Sombra, maybe not (I haven't decided yet, but it won't matter much.) Telling more would be a major spoiler :)

Dust could have a disagreement with a guard which leads to a fight in which Dust realizes that he doesn't have a non-lethal fighting style. Commence learning montage with the guard in non-lethal fighting...

All Dust knows about swordfighting comes from Ahrah. Such a gap in his knowledge would require some explanation. More importantly, Ahrah should warn him. Would Dust challenge the guard, hear the warning and then surrender immediately?

P.S. Note to self: fighting not to death reminded Dust of the turning point in Sombra's life when he stopped caring about the well-being of others.

5681465 Pretty much.
They would be a very twisted & corrupted cult, if they see King Sombra more powerful leader than naive & weaken Celestia or Soft Princess Cadence.

To keep a cult alive, they would spread a false stories about King Sombra on their children. Making sure that their legacy will live on.
A religion can be a very dangerous weapon. Especially when it turn a faithful follower into a fanatic suicide zealot.

Continue their practice on the dark magic and pray for their the fallen dark king, to grant them his knowledge & power.
Think these guys similar to Los Iluminados's cultists from Resident Evil 4.

  • Viewing 1 - 50 of 8