TRules for Bodyguards

• MLP: FiM
• Romance
• Drama

When he was promoted to head of Cadance’s Royal Bodyguard, Shining Armor was prepared to deal with assassination plots, not fancy parties. Unfortunately for him, he discovers an abundance of both.

• Sex
• Violence
• Death
• Profanity
• OC
• Cadance
• Shining Armor
• Royal Guard

ShiningBeacon · 36k words  ·  59  4 · 1.3k views

Review: Rules for Bodyguards

Tags: [Sex], [Violance], [Death], [Profanity], [Romance], [Drama]

Critic:  I won't be doing a summary just like the other incomplete fiction.  I don’t have all the stuff for a summary.

The writing is well written and this fiction does deserve some praise.  Although I will only go as far as the fiction will let me since this is another incomplete fiction.

If you're a new writer I highly recommend this guy.

The flow of this fiction is well renowned for its deep grammar and almost perfection.  Using slang doesn’t help but it takes away points from using them.  What is slang?  A slang word is like gonna, wanna, etc that stuff.  In professionals, critics are far well known; it's an error and a mistake.  Somepony is also an error that shouldn’t be there, however as long as I can read it clearly I think I know.  Someone is one word Somepony is also two words but why isn’t 1 word. According to traditional writing all of them used to be one word.  But however, we are in the modern age which is not the problem… only slang words nowadays.

Critic pt 2:  There are a lot of things I like about this fiction.  That is it’s structure, characters are likeable and it does have those good moments so far.  Death does have its moments. Maybe one day it will go to a past section maybe on the good life it had. 

I never knew death can have sad moments but good moments that spend time together… wait shouldn’t this have a sad tag too?  OH…  well… since it doesn’t have a sad tag maybe skipping the moments would be pretty much that.  No one knows until this user completes it.    :3

Being a Critic pt 3:  There are some I do happen to question a lot of the lore of this fiction.  However I’ll have to wait till the user finishes this fiction before I can ask such questions.

The idea is clearly a 10/10 so far.

The flow of this fiction so far is clearly a 8/10. (unfinished product)

Choice of words is clearly a 8/10. (slang words is what brought it down.)

Grammar is clearly at least a 8/10. (slang words are an error in my books.)

The score of this fiction is clearly an 8.5/10 so far.

Thank you for the feedback!