I might as well open up about this, since it should simplify things in certain areas. I've mentioned this offhandedly in at least one group, I've chatted a little with some folks about it, and the small group of people who count as my closest friends on the site know about it. Here's the deal:

I've got clinical depression. I was diagnosed around age 14, and my teen years are a fair distance behind me in the rear-view mirror. It's been part of my life to varying degrees since then, and has actually caused me a lot of problems that I don't want to get into right now. (Let's just say I have some "lost years" and leave it at that.) Things got much worse for me a couple of years ago, when I more or less had a breakdown. Sure, sometimes I'm functional, but all too often, I'm not. Not really.

For years now, I've had a stock answer when asked about the effects of this condition: "Some days are better than others."

So, if...
- I haven't written anything on my incomplete stories in several months
- I'm not giving you story feedback as quickly as you might like
- I'm not responding to your PMs right away
- I'm not editing that thing I said I would as soon as you would like
- I haven't updated the review list in a particular group in a few days
- I'm not as active as an admin in some groups as other people are
- I just seem distant or absent in general
...it's because sometimes I just can't do it. I'm sorry.

Source Link

Of course, you know I know this, and you know I support you 100%. You really do everything you can, and sometimes a little more.

4105183
...and you, I'm sure, know that you count in that small group of "closest friends" that I mentioned when I was typing this.

4105188
I am, but it's not like fixing a car. It isn't always easy to see that progress is being made, there's no way of being sure when things will be done, and so on...

I'm... I'm sorry. I had no idea. From your comments, reviews and the like, I never got the impression. Maybe I was missing something, but this is the first I've heard of this.

You're a great guy for admitting this and trying to deal with it. You're a great guy in general, and I wish you the best. Remain strong.

4105301
Well, as I've said, I've only opened up in a few posts, and to a handful of people.
Also, hiding this sort of thing is a skill. Sometimes I'm pretty good at it...

4105327 All right--that's bullshit. There's nothing good or pleasant about clinical depression AT ALL, and that's an ignorant response. That is not the way the real world works. It's not my call, but I think you should apologize.

Wow. You're a pretty strong guy to be doing all this, and being so active pretty much everywhere on the site, despite your problem.
I applaud you for your amazing perseverance, and I could never demand you do more, considering you're doing even more than me.
You're pretty great, Elric, and constantly fighting just to be so makes you even greater.
I hope you'll get better one day.

4104838
It sounds to me as though you're doing a helluva lot for folks here, while dealing with a lot more than most people do. I can't say I see a lot to apologize for.

I can say, I hope this all doesn't ever become more of a burden than fun to you.

4105327
There's actually not a whole lot of understanding of or sympathy for mental health issues when it comes to the workplace, if you must know. Maybe it's different in other countries, I don't know. But here in the USA, there's still a lot of stigma attached to having an issue like this.

4105395
Thank you, my loyal guard pegasus.

4105439
Thank you.

4105644
When I feel like it's a burden, that's when I have to go do something else. But there's a lot of fun to be had, which is why I keep coming around. It's also the reason why I do things like co-write reviews with Scoots.