That Godcat-damned title sounds like a sentence fragment, hence my putting an ellipses in parenthesis in the title. This is the last known hiatus'd/cancelled work in the Submissions folder, so I went and decided "why not knock this out today?"

Genres are Sad and Slice of Life, compacted into a big green E-rating. This is also the last E-rated fic. Hrm...

Wordcount is 22,985 words long, divided into seven chapters. I've read the first one and peeked in at the fourth one, but the peeking-ahead thing was more or less to confirm something. I assure you guys would have likely done the same upon seeing the fourth chapter's title.

Grammar: Pretty solid. I didn't detect any immediate errors, and a page's manuscripts are confined to a nifty quote box, which I believe to be a stylistic choice on the author's part. Paragraphs are indented, but sadly are compressed into a wall that's only broken up near the end by the aforementioned quote-box. 8.5/10.

Characterization: This one has suffered from lots of telling, and minimal showing. It's even flat-out stated, not shown, that when a visiting duke dropped by, Celestia of all ponies suggested jokingly his neck go on a guillotine. JOKINGLY, I must stress. On top of that, around half of what she says felt forced, which is never a good thing. All in all, .5/10 for this one.

Use of show canon: Expands on this a bit, in that banishment times can be lessened if the Elements of Harmony are to blame. Celestia finds a book that helps her lessen Luna's stuck-in-the-moon sentence, and the Canterlot Archives are mentioned. All in all... 3.5/10.

Plot consistency: 10/10; established what it wanted and ran through it.

Coherence: I have to concede a 10/10 for this one, sadly. Largely because of the telling.

Extra things depending on genre: Sad... didn't get much spotlight, if at all. It wasn't barely there; oh no, it was off taking a vacation in Hawaii. Did not feel any heartstrings get tugged at whatsoever. 0/10. Slice of Life, on the other hand, is more prominent. It's actually present, but is sorely slacking off. 2/10.

And now, the verdict. The story scores 34.5/70, or 49.3%. It was mediocre, bland, suffers from wall-of-text, and is horrendously stilted. I'd give the author advice, but he's been away for 112 weeks and counting.