The Mailbox (and related stories) 207 members · 2 stories
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bookplayer
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bats
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June 24th

somewhat tired brain Princess of Magic
From the desk of Twilight Sparkle, student of Princess Celestia
Why does Stalliongrad have zero places to order custom letterheads?

Dear Rarity,

As a mare of refined taste and aesthetics, I’d like to ask your opinion on something. I’m going to do my best to accurately transcribe an exchange I had this morning with Cadence and my brother.

Cadence: “Twilight, stop struggling and let the nice mare finish your mane.”
Me: “But today we’re supposed to be touring smelting facilities. There’s no logical sense for this; we’re going to be covered head to hooves in ashes in two hours.”
Cadence: “But you have to make the right impression going into the facility.”
Me: “UGH.”
BBBFF: “Twilee, it’s just part of the routine. You’ll get used to it.”
Me: “The routine is stupid!”
Cadence: “Listen, Twilight. I know this isn’t exactly your thing, but you’re blowing it out of proportion. Sure, it’s kind of silly to do up your mane and wear these outfits to go somewhere like an industrial complex, but it’s a societal obligation.”
Me: “Why?”

They couldn’t answer me, Rarity. I’ve never gotten any of these social status, high society rules, and they’re making me grind my teeth. Rules are supposed to make sense, but there is no sense in putting on your best outfit and traipsing around a factory where they burn coal all hours of the day. When we toured the first building, we had to wear masks over our muzzles to keep from breathing any of the soot, and when we left and I took my mask off, I had noticeable marks on my face where the soot hadn’t touched.

I tried to picture you stepping hoof into a place like that wearing a Gala dress and I think my imagination tried to go on strike.

Am I wrong here? Is there something I’m missing? You always know so much more about this social etiquette than I do. Princess Celestia first instructed me on etiquette as a filly, and for a long time I had successfully memorized table manners down to the fourth fork on the right (pastry fork?), but this is just so…

Rarity, this makes no sense, don’t you see? There’s no logic here, it’s all meaningless rules for the sake of rules that leaves either a good or bad impression based on nothing and I don’t know why and I can’t stand not knowing why.

I apologize. I took a break to bang my head on the coffee table; I feel a little better now. If you have any insight I’d love to hear it, because it seems like nopony around here is interested in making sense anymore.

How is Baltimare treating you? I remember visiting there as a filly with Shining and my parents and really liking it, but I spent so much time with my snout in a book I don’t remember many details. I hope you have time around your work to see the city. Oh, I heard there’s a wax statue of Canter Alan Poe in a coffee shop he frequented when writing; you’ll have to tell me if that’s true or not.

-Twilight Sparkle

bats
Group Admin

1179552

June 28th

From Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Magic, attempting a new sending spell to mimic dragonfire.

Dear Rarity,

Thank you for the travel kit, it is quite lovely. I’d say I’m surprised how much it matches my eyes, but you always catch those details, so I shouldn’t be surprised at all. I’m not sure I’ll be able to take it with me; I never seem to be able to go around with any sort of bag anymore. Is it too much to ask for me to be able to have a book or five at hoof for times when I’m just sitting around waiting? We have attendants around, who are always fussing away and touching things up anyway (which is a bit of a nightmare; they put makeup on over all that soot! I scrubbed my face eleven times before it felt clean afterwards), so maybe one of them will take it along. Oh, but I don’t want to do that, this was from you for me, not for an attendant!

I still don’t really get this whole image thing. Attendants, fancy and restrictive dresses for everything, exacting decorum, even ‘appropriate facial expressions.’ It makes me feel more like a porcelain doll than anything else. I suppose I can understand the desire behind the image, but I’m just a pony, Rarity. Why should I be pretending to be anything else?

I’d tell you to not worry about the dress, but I know you and you’d just guess on specifications and send me one anyway. And truth be told, it’ll be nice to hold something you’ve hoof-made for me; it’ll make me feel like I’m back in Ponyville for a little while. Plus, after that lovely dress you made for my birthday, you know what I like in clothing and I’m sure to love anything you make much more than the puffy things they stuff me in here. Now then, specifications.

Temperatures between 77.2K-1643.2K
Humidity ranges between 0-100%
Wind speed of 372 kilometers per hour
Rainfall rate of 40.1 cm per hour
Snowfall rate of 23.1 cm per hour
9.0 magnitude earthquake

I…I think I’m getting carried away. Those temperature ranges are from liquid nitrogen’s boiling point to steel’s melting point; if I’m actually coming into contact with either of those, my dress is the least of my worries. I need to stop consulting almanacs when somepony asks me a question.

Just…okay, so most of the time we’re in town centers or private homes and not doing anything that’s going to cause a lot of wear and tear. We’ll be touring a number of local facilities all across Equestria, some of them will be labor-intensive like the smelting facilities, but most of the time it’ll be more like going through any shop in Ponyville. Is that helpful?

I believe we’ll be making a stop in Baltimare. I’m not sure when, but Luna mentioned an old playhouse there she’s excited to see. I’ll try to let you know when I’ll be in town so we can go to lunch and distract each other for a while. Hope it’s sooner rather than later.

-Twilight Sparkle

PS Mimicking dragonfire is harder than I expected. Princess Celestia has a sending spell connected to Spike’s dragonfire, so it’s a simple matter of summoning a small amount of it to form a pathway. I had experimented with it and thought I’d gotten a suitable facsimile, but it didn’t work properly and all the letters showed up again, so I’m sending this the normal way instead. Hope to hear from you soon.

-Twilight Sparkle (July 1st)

bats
Group Admin

1179552

OOC: This letter is hastily scrawled, arrives out of the blue, and is barely legible

Rarity—

Could I perhaps trouble you to write a song? Only if it’s not too much to ask and you have time, I know you’re probably very busy. But it’s for science!

-Twilight Sparkle

Steel Resolve
Group Admin

July 10th

Dearest Twilight,

Stopping in Baltimare you say? Well, that will be pleasant. Incidentally, would you or Luna have any advice for a rather untimely labor riot? I seem to have upset the actors with my demands to actually be allowed to perform the duties laid out in my contract and now production has halted entirely. Also the director seems to have skipped town with the majority of the play's profits.

Sincerely yours,

Rarity.

P.S. If I don't make it out of this contract alive, tell Sweetie Belle I love her.

bats
Group Admin

1386208

August 3rd

From Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Magic

Dear Rarity,

My goodness, is everything alright? I got your letter just recently and it’s dated nearly a month ago. Labor riots are not usually violent, but you’re worrying me with your post script. Please get back to me soon and let me know if everything’s okay.

I asked Princess Luna about labor riots, but she told me the only thing that she has any experience that comes close to matching that was leading the coup against Discord with Princess Celestia, and , quote, ‘The ways of war have no place among business disputes.’ Which is a quote I’m rather fond of out of context, and plan on remembering. Sorry, off-topic.

I’m really not sure what sort of advice to give you without knowing the exact situation. I know I’m probably over-reacting and there’s a strong chance things have already resolved in a peaceful way since your last letter (please let me know soon, okay? I’ve already derailed this tour once to have an extremely necessary face-to-face with both Applejack and Rainbow, but if you need me, I’ll fly all the way to Baltimare myself if I have to), but if you’re still having trouble I’m happy to offer whatever advice I can.

Speaking of going to Baltimare, I’m still wholly unsure when that will be, but based on the path so far, I wouldn’t be surprised if it isn’t towards the end of the trip altogether. That might mean I’ll have a chance to see the play you’re doing all this designing for!

Provided there’s still a play by then. Write back soon!

-Twilight Sparkle

Steel Resolve
Group Admin

1427873

Aug 4th

Dearest Twilight,

Where to begin... Well, the walkout by the actors sparked a bit of a city-wide strike. It began because the mail service office joined the actors in their walkout (they were having unrelated issues and chose to act at that moment in solidarity) before long workers in all walks of life had left their careers crying out that their talents were being wasted. (In fact some of them were, but many had talents that really did not fit into their chosen field, little to be done then.) So you just now received... Oh Celestia...

Twilight, I may not be returning to Ponyville. You see, I sent a number of letters during the strike, and if you have received yours only now there is a good chance two in particular have made their way to Whinnypeg. I hope your trip goes well, for myself I think I shall see if I can find more permanent arrangements here.

Sincerely yours,

Rarity

bats
Group Admin

1428277

August 11th

From Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Magic

Dear Rarity,

I’m very relieved to hear you’re okay. I was getting ready to fly to Baltimare myself, which would not have gone over terribly well with Princess Celestia or Princess Luna, especially after Las Pegasus. I take it things have calmed down in the past month? A mail carrier strike certainly explains the delay, and the fact that I finally got your letter suggests it’s been resolved.

Now then, what’s all this about Fluttershy? I can’t imagine you could say or do anything in a letter that would jeopardize your friendship with her permanently; Fluttershy is so understanding of everypony. If any of us six were to get in a disagreement, I think she would be the first to seek peace, even over Pinkie. The rest of us can be a little hot-headed at times, but Fluttershy seems to save that for special occasions. I don’t know that you could drop a Grand Galloping Gala, self-help seminar, or dragon attack in a letter.

I don’t know. I’m probably projecting my own recent experience with ‘accidentally sent’ letters, which resolved in a way that was far stranger and far better than I could have expected. I’m not sure if either Rainbow or Applejack told you in any letters, but Applejack sent a couple of letters after a night out that got sparked a rather complicated mess of emotions. The end result was us all meeting in Las Pegasus and talking it out. Now we’re all kinda sorta dating each other.

It’s still odd writing that out. You may think it sounds sordid or something, but for where I was and am at emotionally, and for both Applejack and Rainbow as well, it’s been wonderful. It’s certainly helped me deal with this vacation better since I saw them both.

So, if I have any advice to give in this situation, not knowing what you said, it’s to talk it out with her. Fluttershy is such a good-hearted pony, I’m sure whatever disagreement you had will be water under the bridge in no time.

Good luck, for everything! Wait…you’re not supposed to wish luck on stage productions. Good luck with Fluttershy, break a leg for everything else!

-Twilight Sparkle

Steel Resolve
Group Admin

August 13th

Dearest Twilight Sparkle,

“Okay” is a relative term, but for the record I am physically well, although I’m probably going to have to seriously restrict my alcohol intake in the near future. I begin to see how Berry got started. At first you get bored and have a few drinks to make yourself feel better, then things fail to improve and you drink more to dull your pain.

Then one lonely night after striking out with the entire cast and spending an inappropriate amount of time watching two of the female leads commit an atrocious display of public affection you think Celestia, I wish that was me, I bet I could invite Fluttershy over and we could do that. Who the hay needs a stallion anyway? Now these are thoughts I have had before, but there is normally a voice in my head that tells me pursuing such things is a bad idea. Well, that voice was quite heated as well, and encouraged me to write about it.

So there I was, drinking a nice red and suggesting my wonderful friend might come over some night and throw caution to the wind with me, maybe give me a nice sensual massage with a happy ending. I was throwing myself at the poor girl, Twilight.

Disagreements require some communication on both sides. Since I sent the first letter I have sent three in apology, and there has been no response since. The last one... well here, I make duplicates of anything I write or draw ever since Opal decided a stack of dress designs would make an excellent place to take care of business.

(OOC: Rarity sends a copy of the letter)

I suppose I can’t just run away from this. I’ll have to confront her and beg her forgiveness for being so forward. Fluttershy is not a pony you just proposition out of the blue. She would need to be carefully courted and reassured every step of the way, educated in all the various ways one shows affection. I can just picture the look of ecstasy—No! I’m doing it again! Bad Rarity, she is your friend! Stop sexualizing the poor girl she can’t help how she looks...

Ugh, so there you have it, Twilight. I am deep in lust with Fluttershy, and I have no idea if she will ever even talk to me again. So no, “okay” is not a word I would use.

Sincerely yours,

Rarity

bats
Group Admin

1495651

August 23rd

From Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Magic

Dear Rarity,

I’m sorry for not getting back to you more quickly, but I’ve been kept so busy I haven’t had any time to read, let alone write anypony. I’ve gotten used to a lot of what’s asked of me now, and it’s far less awkward and frustrating than when we first left, but I get so tired anymore.

That was something I really noticed being around Rainbow for a few days again. Being around others gives her energy: she can feed off a crowded room like it’s a double-shot of espresso. By the end of the day, barring any hard conversations with famous ponies she looks up to, she’s ready to run circles around me like a filly, while I’m left feeling like I ran a marathon.

It’s kind of nice to see that in her.

…You’ll have to forgive me, I’ve been put in a rather reflective mood. I left Las Pegasus again just a few hours ago, and being there has left me in a strange mindset. Not a bad one, or anything—well, I’m in an odd place with Shining at the moment, but other than that…

Ugh. I wish my brain would shut up sometimes.

Anyway, Rainbow told me that you may have found something with Fluttershy, but that things have been a bit emotionally unstable for you since then. I’m not sure on all the details, since Rainbow has a tendency to take detailed things and run over them without looking, and…well, I’m not sure if I’d even have any advice. I’m not the most experienced in the field of romance, and I’m still trying to figure out what’s going on in my own head most of the time.

I guess all I can do is wish you good luck. I hope whatever is going on ends with you in a place where you’re happy, and Fluttershy’s happy, and I can see both of you happy. I got to see Rainbow’s smile again, and I realized how much I miss everypony’s smiles.

I probably didn’t notice how Rainbow can feed off a room while a room feeds off of me, because it never happens like that in Ponyville. Well, that’s not entirely true; all five of you can be utterly exhausting at times, but when we’re just spending time together as a group I do feel more alive. You girls really mean the world to me.

This letter is probably a bit of a mess. I need something to distract myself. I hope you’re doing well, and good luck!

-Twilight Sparkle

Steel Resolve
Group Admin

1591601

August 25th

Dearest Twilight,

I completely understand, darling. You are a princess now, noblesse oblige. I think the problem you are having is... there are those of us who seek out the sun, and thrive in it. I understand Rainbow in that respect. Then there are those of us who are thrust into the spotlight unwillingly. Fluttershy comes to mind, and it appears, yourself.

Ponies like you wilt under the attention, it’s a draining experience because you never wanted it to begin with. It’s also, I suspect, why you find us so exhausting. The friendship you forged with us is not one you would have chosen in the normal course of your life. You feel invigorated because the bonds are good and healthy ones, but at the same time drained because you often find yourself being thrust in the middle of our problems. I’m sorry for my part in that, but at the same time I am not. Even if you don’t have the answer, you make me feel better for having listened to me.

Even writing to you now... I can see how draining I must be on my poor Fluttershy. How much she must be wilting at the idea that I see her in the way I do. Oh, Twilight... I’m so very horrid for what I did to her. She was happy before I put pen to paper and made an ass of myself, I likely ruined her vacation with stress over my petty infatuation.

I... hope she can forgive me for doing that to her. And I hope you’ll forgive me for troubling you while you’re at a very trying time in your own life. From what Applejack and Rainbow have written, they love you very much, and I am so happy for you all. Do be sure to drop by the shop to be fitted for new dresses when you decide to make things official

Sincerely yours,

Rarity

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