Miss Harshwhinny is Best Pony 397 members · 94 stories
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horizon
Group Contributor

Hey guys! I just noticed on Meghan McCarthy's twitter feed that the show will have FIFTY-THREE NEW ALICORNS in Season Four! That got me to thinking.

If you go to the story browse page and click on the searchbar, it will show you tags for all the named characters in the show (except for Miss Harshwhinny, who has transcended such petty glory-seeking). I counted the number of unique ponies in the tags — leaving out alicorns, pets, and non-ponies — and there are … ready for this? … 61.

So now I'm wondering. Who WON'T become an alicorn in Season 4? Clearly Miss Harshwhinny will get her long-deserved wings and horn, which leaves 52 new alicorns out of 61 named cast. Who are the unlucky nine?

(edit: added spoiler tags… SORRY GUYS)

horizon
Group Contributor

DUDE. SPOILER TAGS.

horizon
Group Contributor

866413
Sorry! I forgot we're supposed to use them when we're talking about upcoming seasons. I went back and added them in.

horizon
Group Contributor

866414 Thank you.

866412

Nine non-alicorns? Wouldn't that be the other five elements of harmony, the cmc, and Spike?

Though I hope not. I'd love to see the cutie mark crusaders as alicorns.One reason why I was disappointed at the princess coronation, was I was hoping it'd be Scootaloo's...

Wait, isn't Harshwhinny already a triplecorn? Doesn't that only leave 50 new alicorns?

866426
What? Just... no. Do you even math?

horizon
Group Contributor

866412 ummm sorry to say this but your math is off

derpy hooves and ditzy doo are two separate ponies

so you need ten ponies to not alicornicate

that having been said

daring doo would be one of the ten because unlike the other ponies shes fictional

866427
I do, actually! I math every day (twice on Saturdays), and sometimes I even chemistry as well.

866431
Okay, cool! Just checking.

horizon
Group Contributor

866425
Oh! Spike's a pony? That … actually makes things a lot easier. My Spikewhinny shipfic won't have to address the horrors of miscegenation.

866426
Oh! Good point. We don't need to count Miss Harshwhinny then. No — wait. We do. If she's already a triplecorn, she would count as -2 alicornings because the new season would have to remove two of them.

866429
Hmm, both good points (clearly I need to have 866431 double-check my math), except that Daring's not the only fictional pony. There's also, um, what's-her-name.

horizon
Group Contributor

866440
> Daring's not the only fictional pony. There's also, um, what's-her-name.

Applejack?

horizon
Group Contributor

866442 Yes! That was it.

Relatedly, I've always suspected Pumpkin Cake and Pound Cake are Pinkie Pie hallucinations caused by too much late-night flour-snorting.

866440

Oh, you know, I'd better put a spoiler tag on that. But, yes, if Spike's mother Twilight is a pony, he is clearly a pony as well.

horizon
Group Contributor

866412
There's another problem with your math. You said you left out pets, but I don't see how you got to 61 unless you accidentally included Granny Smith.

horizon
Group Contributor

866458
CRAP! You're right. I'm so embarrassed.

Alright, so let's recount: Since Daring and Applejack aren't real ponies, we need seven non-alicorns, plus one for the Derpy/Ditzy error, minus one for Granny Smith (and you know why seven plus one minus one is six plus one, because addition is commutative, right) … and six plus one leaves…?

(Let's not always see the same hooves.)

866440
I'm pretty sure What's Her Name is already a princess, though.

horizon
Group Contributor

866482
I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to be ambiguous. I literally meant that I couldn't remember Fictional Pony Applejack's name. I completely forgot about Fictional Princess What's Her Name (the pink one with the heart-butt).

Fortunately, since she's already an alicorn, she doesn't throw the math off either way.

horizon
Group Contributor

866493 Her name's Cadance.

horizon
Group Contributor

866495
YOU FOOL! DON'T SAY THAT NAME!

If we say "Cadance" three times, it'll summon her. DON'T CALL UP WHAT YOU CAN'T PUT DOWN.

SweetAI Belle
Group Contributor

866499

Is that how we get Cadance to show up? I was wondering if she got my message through without any issues....

Cadance, Cadance, Cadence.

horizon
Group Contributor

866581 when she shows up i call first dibs on the three wishes

866596
Nu-uh. I summoned her. I get first wish! :yay:

866599
Just make sure you got her name right. It is incredibly important that yo-OH SWEET CELESTIA WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!

866603

Cadance, Cadance, Cadence.

866605

Don't worry, the usual standard is three times by three different people, and SweetAI Belle had already said "Cadance" a third time before you tried to invoke her.

And SweetAI Belle is her friend, so the princess shouldn't do anything too nasty. To her, anyways.

horizon
Group Contributor

866604
Seriously? Stop worrying, you big baby. This is the age of the Internet. All Blue has to do is hit the "undo" key and retroactively edit his summoning spell.

(Unburning the candle, unbreaking the mirror, and ungrowing the sacrificial apple might be more tricky, but I'm sure there's a FAQ for that somewhere on Yahoo! Answers.)

horizon
Group Contributor

866808
:rainbowderp: AAAAAAHHHHHH

:pinkiegasp: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

:ajbemused: UNBREAK THE MIRROR BLUE

:flutterrage: UNBREAK IT RIGHT NOW

:twilightoops: IT ISN'T WORKING WE'RE DOOMED

:raritydespair: SAVE US, REAL FICTITIOUS PRINCESS WHAT'S-HER-NAME

Er, what's the panic, my little ponies? I'm right here, and if you wanted to summon me, you could have used the private message feature. I do hope that nopony tried it and it just wasn't working.

Sweetie, we're... we're working on it. There are some complications. Just sit tight and continue to have fun with these... ponies.

Skywriter
Group Admin

Seaponies.

Skywriter
Group Admin

867135
"Seaponies" isn't even a relevant answer to the OP's question! I swear, some of you exist just to type "seaponies" as an answer to every blog post and write-in poll you can find. What will you guys do when they finally do put seaponies in?

Skywriter
Group Admin

867143
shed joyful tears

forever

Skywriter
Group Admin

867143
Actually, it seems like a reasonable answer to me. Question: Who won't become an alicorn? Answer: Seaponies. Not only is it a good answer, but I think it's a correct one.

SweetAI Belle
Group Contributor

867116

No problem. I'm fine here anyways for the moment. I've found myself running a few forums and things. I just really want to make sure I don't have anypony worrying about me back home, and since these other ponies seemed to be trying to reach you anyways, this seemed like a good time to ask about it.

Oh, do you know if there was really a filly named Snowdrop that made the first snowflake? I heard a story about that recently...

horizon
Group Contributor

hey real fictitious 867116

while 866866 is fighting off your evil double and 866850 is cowering in the corner im going to jump the queue and get the first wish if thats cool with you i mean

so

i wish for the talking dinosaur to return

i kind of miss him

also if youre one of those genies that perverts wishes by interpreting them literally i figure asking for dinosaurs will provoke maximum hilarity

horizon
Group Contributor

867152
Maybe you can answer a question that's bugged me for a while. The show has earth ponies, pegasi (air ponies), and by the grace of Celestia will soon have sea ponies again.

So …

Where are the fire ponies?

866429
Dammit, you made me waste my afternoon reading that :twilightangry2:

867302
Okay, I think I got it under contr-

Skywriter
Group Admin

867361
Unicorns are "fire ponies". Clover the Clever was the first wielder of the Fire of Friendship, after all.

867156
I'm afraid that was somewhat before my time, Sweetie. The technique for fashioning snowflakes has been around since time immemorial, and the pegasus pony who first prepared a snowflake may well have had a name, but I'm not certain we know said filly's identity. It might well have been "Snowdrop". But I never knew such a pony, nor (I figure) does any pony now living.

Just... let me know if anything changes. We're all fine out here. I am assured that there is nothing to worry about.

867302
I'm afraid that you may have me confused with some other pony. I am Mi Amore Cadenza, called "Verticordia" or "she who turns hearts", alicorn princess of love, memory and rejuvenation. In my youth, I responded to petitions to sway hopeful souls to love, but I have since found that much heartache comes of this path and that it is best if love finds its own way; don't worry, it will! In any case, though, I am sadly unable to answer a petition to produce your dinosaur friend. The young Princess Twilight Sparkle recently ascended to the sphere of Friendship, however. She could possibly trace him with the bonds of the friendship you share.

My only other suggestion is that you somehow locate my auntie Anachron, alicorn princess of awesome dinosaurs. But she has not been seen in many years, not since the fall of Everfree, certainly. And I have thus never met her.

SweetAI Belle
Group Contributor

867896

Ok, just thought I'd ask. And I'll let you know if I run into trouble on this side. There are a bunch of nice ponies around here, though, even if some of them are pretty strange. I can keep occupied pretty easily.

Though I learned pretty early that I need to make sure this "Mature" checkbox thingy on fimfiction stays unchecked. I think in this context, mature means creepy. I still get notified about some really horrid stuff. Like The drop from the snow being added to the Snowdrop Fanclub. Who'd write such a horrible thing?

As far as getting in touch with the others, I just worry about other ponies worrying about me, if that makes sense. And Twilight sitting there guilt tripping herself. I want to make sure Rarity and Scoots and Apple Bloom aren't worried about how I'm doing.

My parents, not so much. I'm not sure they even know I'm gone yet, actually. They didn't for the wedding, you know. Rarity asked me to come to the wedding with her when I was at the Carousel Boutique, and said she'd tell them.

She forgot, though. When I came back, they acted normal, then when I started telling them about the wedding, they were surprised to know I had been to it. They hadn't even noticed I hadn't been in Ponyville all that time.

When I asked, they just said they figured I'd been at Rarity's. I suppose being with Rarity is close, but...

I already kinda knew they were like that. It just sort of confirmed things. That's one reason I tend to hang out at Rarity's. At least she notices me there, even if it's in the context of "Sweetie Belle, don't touch that!".

Anyways, I don't suppose Scoots or Apple Bloom'd be able to use one of those aetheric teletype machines to access the forums here?

Um, I already have huge broadband and power bills. I am not setting up Scootaloo and Apple Bloom AIs...

Skywriter
Group Admin

All fifty-three new alicorns are Miss Harshwhinny.

868538
Wait, so you're the one responsible for this?

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