When I was little, I used to stare back at the reflection of the tiny dragon that was looking back at me. I always told myself that someday I would grow up and I would be strong, brave, and handsome. Strong enough to go out on adventures with my friends and beat up anyone that would hurt them. Brave to the point where all the knights and heroes of old would be shamed. More handsome than any prince so that Rarity could see me not as a baby dragon, but someone who cared about her and wanted her hoof with love and compassion in his heart. I often imagined what my older self would say to me if we could ever talk through the mirrors.
Now that I am older, I would have told the Spike of the past so many things.
Mostly that his life wasn’t going to end up the way he wanted it.
I wasn’t strong enough to save my friends, most of whom are dead now. I wasn’t brave enough to speak my opinion to Twilight about how I didn’t approve of what we were doing to the humans in fear of earning her disapproval. Handsome? Who cares? I might as well be the most handsome dragon in the world if only because all of the other dragons are dead.
Glancing into the mirror, I closed my eyes and turned away with a growl, gazing over my room, a room that was once Princess Luna’s, in the rebuilt palace. After she died in the Battle of Jerusalem, Celestia ordered it to be sealed and never opened again. Nopony cared about what sun bitch’s demands were after her crimes came to light. The entire place was ransacked and wiped clean of all valuables by desperate ponies who didn’t care anymore about working in a palace of princesses that turned their entire race into monsters. Not that it mattered since Twilight planned to redo the castle anyway after peace had been made.
It wasn’t as tall or big as the former home of the Royal Family, mostly because Twilight wanted to use most of the treasury to rebuild Equestria, but it still was regal enough to serve as a place of government; at least until the Congress Building was built across the city for the new Senate. It was hard to choose what form of government Equestria was going to follow since Twilight had no plans on continuing the monarchy after her death. While I was technically adopted by Twilight, I wasn’t suited for ruling a nation. No, when Twilight died it would be the Equestria Republic instead of the Kingdom of Equestria.
I exited my room and made my way down the hall, nodding to the pony staff and human soldiers who stood in attention for any threats. Even though the Equestrian Freedom Fighters were gone, there was still those who were against Equestria’s surrender. Those that remained, what little there were, were hiding in remote places, but eventually they would fold. I had gotten used to the human soldiers now since Equestria wasn’t allowed a military until the U.N. deemed it ready; most likely when the next generation was grown up enough to make their own decisions. We still had police forces in the cities, both those that survived the invasion or were being rebuilt, but that was it. No guards, no military, not even a militia.
Most didn’t even complain. After years of war, everypony just wanted peace; it didn’t matter if they lost.
I soon found myself in front of two big purple doors with Twilight’s cutie mark on them. Sighing, I knocked before unlocking the door. With a sad smile, I glanced at the one who had been my mother, sister, teacher, and best friend all at the same time.
“Hello, Spike,” she weakly muttered as she looked up from her book. The only light came from the sunlight in the glass window nearby which shined down on her bed.
I sat down beside her in the same chair I’d sat in every day for the past year or so. “You look a bit better.”
She chuckled. “No, I don’t.”
Truth was she looked as well as one could be when dying of cancer. Despite being fifty and... dying... she was fine. Her hair was grayer and she looked older with a far paler tone in her coat, but she still had the same kindness in her eyes. The same kindness that I stayed loyal to after everything that’s happened.
When I learned of what Celestia had done, when I learned what had become of my kind, I just wanted to burn everything around me. Twilight sensed this as she gave me a small forest to vent my anger on. I destroyed it in a single day, but that wasn’t enough to calm the pain in my heart. Even now, it still isn’t enough.
It wasn’t the fact that Celestia killed my entire kind that bothered me the most. It wasn’t the fact that when I pass away, hundreds or thousands of years from now, there will be no more dragons. It’s the fact that I’ll never be able to carry on my kind’s legacy. I never knew what it meant to really be a dragon. I was raised by ponies and the culture, lifestyle, history, and knowledge of dragonkind was unknown to them. I knew nothing about my kind, and now that I am the last I cannot carry anything with them as I live. I cannot tell stories with pride, I cannot let the legends of my people be remembered, and I cannot even mourn for all their deaths the way dragons did.
I am a dragon who knows nothing of being a dragon except for breathing fire and eating gems. That is what Celestia took from me. That is why the pain in my heart can never stop.
I shook off these dark feelings to focus on Twilight. “What were you reading?”
“Walden by Henry David Thoreau,” answered Twilight, showing me the cover. “It’s pretty good. You know the best thing about not ruling anymore is that I have free time to read human literature. It’s so amazing and different that I feel like I’m a little filly discovering new books again. I especially love the works of Aristotle, Dickens, and Doyle.”
I nodded in agreement. Human literature was always more exciting and flowed a bit better then pony literature. I personally like Tolkien, Rowling, and Clancy. “Is there anything you want to do or talk about today?” I asked, leaning forward.
She looked at me with a smile. “Remember when Fluttershy and her family came last time? Feathershy asked me if I wanted to confess my sins to him since he was a Catholic priest and all. I agreed.”
“Really? But you don’t believe in the Christian god. Or any god for that matter,” I pointed out with a raised eyebrow.
“I don’t, but I guess I just wanted to humor him while at the same time have a backup plan if it turns out there is a god.” Twilight paused and looked outside the window. “What do you think happens to us when we die, Spike?”
I sighed. It was going to be one of those discussions again. If it was anypony else I wouldn’t be bothered it, but talking about death, or any death related issue, only further reminded me that someday, and someday soon, Twilight was going to die. Officially, Twilight had gotten cancer after finally finding a cure for the Conversion Potion. In truth, much to the anger of all of us who cared about her, she had it two years earlier but refused treatment so she could focus on the cure. When I argued to her about it, she only replied, “I was fulfilling a promise to an old friend...” and left it at that.
If she had gotten treatment earlier she could have beaten it, but now it was too late. All she wanted was to spend her last days in peace. Equestria didn’t need her anymore. She had fulfilled her promise to fix Celestia’s mistakes and bring the humans we converted back to their normal selves. After so many years, the Newfoals were human once again. After all the struggle, pain, and loss that came from the moment we arrived on Earth to the cure being made, Twilight was ready to simply rest and wait to die.
Since she was waiting for an answer, I gave one, “I honestly don’t know.”
“I’ve looked into a few books about such theories, both human and pony,” said Twilight, leaning back against her pillow. “None of them really give an answer or at least one that has a logical reasoning behind it. I guess that’s why they call it faith.” She looked at me. “Do you believe in a god, Spike?”
“... not in the normal sense,” I answered.“I don’t think there is an old man with a white beard that looks down on us, but I think there is something responsible for everything. Something that causes all life to move on, even after death. I don’t think there is even a heaven or a hell, but I don’t think it ends in nothing either. I think it goes on, but just in a way we don’t understand. You?”
“... I don’t think there is anything,” whispered Twilight, closing her eyes. “As much as I want to believe there is, as much as I want to think I can see any of my friends or family again... the logical side of me thinks nothing happens after death. I’ll die. The end. Forever gone.” She sighed. “Although, I do hope I’m wrong. I really do.”
“... are you scared?” I asked as I took her hoof and squeezed.
For a long time, she didn't answer. When she finally spoke up, a single word came out. A word that cut like a knife.
“... yes.”
***
A few days later, we were visited by some unexpected guests: Lyra and Flash Sentry. While I had seen Lyra plenty of times since she had become an Ambassador representing Equestria with the U.N., it was a surprise to see her husband here. I personally had nothing against Lyra, remembering the early days in Canterlot when she, Twilight, Moondancer, and the other unicorns were friends at school. Whenever she and Twilight interacted it was always on a professional level, doing their best to avoid the fact that the two had previously fought against each other with words, and later magic, before Equestria surrendered.
However, if there was one pony I was not happy to see it was Flash “Heartbreaker” Sentry. He was dressed in his human designed military clothes and caught my glare before doing his best to keep himself as stoic as possible. A part of him looked afraid, but I guess that was because the last time we spoke I said I would burn his bones to ash if I ever saw him again.
“Hello, Spike,” said Lyra with a smile while Flash just nodded to me.
I nodded back to him before giving a smile to Lyra. “Good to see you, Lyra. How’s the kids?”
“Expecting another grandcolt,” said Lyra with a giggle. “Spoiling them is so fun, plus it drives my kids crazy when I do it.” She then frowned and glanced at Twilight’s closed doors. “How long does she have?”
“Not long,” I whispered.
“I’ve come to speak to her. Not about politics just... about us...”
I nodded before turning to Flash. “You wait here.”
“Spike, I-”
“No, if she wants to speak to you, she’ll say so. For now, you stay here,” I growled which made him cower a bit but he sighed and backed away.
I opened the door and allowed Lyra to walk in with me before closing it behind us. Twilight seemed to have finished eating her lunch when she noticed we had a guest. Twilight, to my surprise, smiled and waved. “Hello, Lyra.”
“Hi, Twilight,” whispered Lyra as she walked over and sat down in the seat I usually sat at. “I can see you finally started getting some gray in your mane like me.”
“I think gray suits you better,” said Twilight.
“Yeah, but I prefer my old color. Really stood out,” said Lyra, smoothing her mane out a bit. She took a deep sigh before looking at Twilight with a smile. “So, ready to hit the hay for the last time?”
“Even when I’m dying you never mince words,” said Twilight, shaking her head. “Always to the point.”
“Yeah, well,” Lyra grinned, “it’s just part of my charm.”
The three of us laughed at this and for a second it seemed like the long arguments, fights, and the battles we were all involved with long ago were just memories. Lyra soon calmed herself before leaning back against the chair while Twilight slowly got up more and leaned forward. For a while, there was silence between us. For years it had been either arguments, battles, or just politics whenever the two of them were in a room. From once old friends, to townmates, to enemies, to now mutual assured co-workers. Lyra Heartstrings: The Rebel, Lyre of Justice, Hero and Friend of All Humans. Twilight Sparkle: The Last Princess, Element of Magic, Apprentice of the Human Hating Celestia.
Twilight was the one who spoke first. “You were right...”
“Yeah,” whispered Lyra, crossing her hooves. “I’m not going to apologize for what I said all those years ago. I’m not going to apologize for my protests or outright hostility. And I sure as hay ain’t going to apologize for rebelling. What you and the Princesses were doing was wrong. I just wished so many lives weren’t lost...”
“I wished I listened to you instead of that monster I called ‘mentor’ all those years ago,” Twilight muttered. “I wish we never left our world.”
“Even if it meant all of us dying from an exploding sun?” asked Lyra calmly which made Twilight shook her head up and caused me to raise my eyebrow.
“Wait, what?” I asked, confused.
“How...” asked Twilight in disbelief.
“You didn’t really think the U.N. would let you two talk without secretly recording what was said, did ya?” asked Lyra, smirking. “They didn’t trust you. I didn’t trust you. I know what happened in that cell. So do a few others, but don’t worry. The recordings were destroyed, and we are all keeping our silence. Nobody wants to risk Celestia being seen as a well intentioned extremist.”
“I’m sorry, but I’m confused,” I pointed out.
“I’ll tell you later, Spike. I promise,” Twilight whispered to me before turning to Lyra with a raised eyebrow.
“Is that all you came to tell me?” asked Twilight.
“No,” Lyra sighed, closing her eyes. “I just... I just wanted you to know that I forgive you.” She paused for a moment. “For a long time, even after you learned how horrible Celestia was, I still hated you. It took the Equestria Freedom Fighter’s demise to really make me realize that you suffered just as much as I did. Maybe even more.”
“... I’m sorry about Bon Bon,” said Twilight, closing her eyes. “But I’m not sorry about Sweetie Drops.”
“Sweetie Drops wasn’t my best friend,” whispered Lyra. “My best friend died in Ponyville... I think even Rainbow Dash and Applejack died in Ponyville along with the others. Those two who died there? They weren’t your friends... they weren’t our friends.”
“Yeah,” whispered Twilight before she looked outside our window. “I forgive you too. Will... will Moondancer ever forgiv-”
“No,” stated Lyra with a frown. “Just... no, she won’t...”
“I see...” whispered Twilight, turning back with a sad smile. “I have so many memories of my friends in Ponyville, but I forgot about those I once had in Canterlot... can you share some of them with me?”
Lyra proceeded to talk about the first time they all met in school and I took that as my cue to leave them in order to let them have some private time. I was still confused by what they meant with Celestia, but it didn’t matter. Whatever it was, nothing would make me forgive her. Nothing.
When I got out there, Flash was still outside waiting for his wife. I just sighed in discomfort before walking next to him and resting my back on the wall. I turned away so I didn’t have to look at him, but of course he opened his mouth.
“You're acting ridiculous,” stated Flash, glaring at me. “I get it. You hate me for breaking Twilight’s heart all those years ago. I got that the moment you, her friends, and Shining Armor threatened me when I left the Royal Guards.”
I still didn’t look at him.
“You think it was easy? I loved her, Spike. I really did,” growled Flash as he moved towards me. “But when I saw what that potion did to humans... the way we were treating them as if they were some disease that needed to be purged? I couldn’t be with a mare who not only had a hoof in it, but also agreed with it!”
“You still hurt her,” I whispered, finally looking at him. “She cried for a full month because of what you did to her. You were the only stallion she ever loved and you hurt her. Me and Shining Armor wanted to kill you that day, but we didn’t because Twilight asked us to leave you alone. Trust me, I wanted to meet you on the battlefield when we learned you joined the humans because that was the excuse I needed to kill you.”
“... I didn’t meant to hit her...” whispered Flash, lowering his eyes in shame. “I was just so... angry... frustrated by how blind she was to the suffering we caused... it’s no excuse, I know... but trust me when I say this that I regret what I did and if I could take back that moment my hoof hit her cheek I would.”
“... whatever,” I whispered. I didn’t care about his excuse. I didn’t care about his reasoning. I didn’t care if he was right about the humans. Anyone who hits my sister is scum in my books.
Hours passed, but thankfully it stayed silent. Near supper time, the doors opened and out came Lyra with a sad smile. “We’re done.”
I nodded to Lyra as she and Flash made their way down the hall with a small goodbye. I slowly walked back inside where Twilight was staring at the window. “Flash was here, wasn’t he?”
“Yes,” I answered as I sat down and grabbed her hoof.
She didn’t say anything, just smiled as I squeezed it.
***
“Fuck! Shit! Goddamnit all!” I cried out in fury as I smashed my fist into the wall. I continued to curse as I punched it over and over again. It was only what little self control I had that prevented me from unleashing my flame and burning my room down.
Another coughing attack.
Another day closer to the inevitable.
Another moment where I feared I would hear that Twilight had just died.
Eventually, my energy ran out on punching the wall and was replaced by just sitting on the floor and crying my heart out. I’m so pathetic. Even after everything I’ve seen and done since the war I was still a cry baby. I hated everything at that moment. Everything from cancer to Celestia to even Twilight for refusing treatment for so long. Screw the potion, she could have fixed it eventually. Screw that stupid promise to Celestia, she had no right to keep anything after Celestia kept the real secret of why we moved to Earth.
Just screw... everything.
I leaned my head back and dried my tears with my claws. “I don’t want her to die... please any god up there don’t let her die... don’t let me be alone...”
“Oh, so I don’t count as part of your closest friends?” asked a voice in the air that spooked me a bit, but I soon calmed down because there was only one being who could do that. Sure enough, one teleportation away and Discord was in front of me holding a huge box of tissues... although why they had Bugs Bunny on the sheets was beyond me. Then again, it was Discord.
“We’re not exactly best friends,” I whispered as I got up and took one of the tissues to wipe my eyes. “Not like you need one since every human wants to be buddies with you.”
“True, I think I can safely say that I have every human on earth added as a friend on Facebook,” said Discord as he pulled out a cellphone, showing the large amount of followers that reached past one billion. Thing was, I could believe it was true considering it was Discord who was one of the key allies that helped fight against Celestia when Fluttershy came to the human side.
Despite his powers no longer being as strong as they were upon coming to this dimension, Discord proved more than a match to Twilight, Celestia, or Luna in the battles that raged against us. He was also the only one who activity attacked Equestria before the barrier went down, causing what chaos he could. He never killed, but he distracted and sabotaged enough to help give humanity a better chance against us.
It was ironic that Discord, hated by most of Equestria, was loved by humanity. Even after the war, he was hailed as a hero and he soaked it all up.
“Shouldn’t you be celebrating with the president’s daughter or something,” I said as I made my way to the bed and collapsed on it.
“Ugh, please. I like awards as much as the next spirit of chaos, but if I am given another national award I swear I’ll turn it to life and make it stomp around Tokyo. Might need a few days of rest after that, but it’ll be worth it,” said Discord, summoning up a chair and sitting down. “Honestly, it’s not like I saved the world single handedly.”
I snorted. “No, it’s just that your blood was the key to finally cracking the cure for the Conversion Potion.” I honestly had to admit we all should have seen that coming. Celestia’s blood was the one component that Twilight had problems dealing with for the cure. It only made sense that her opposite in everything was the one who held the solution to the problem.
“If Celly could see this, oh I would give my remaining years to see her face,” giggled Discord.
“To be honest, she didn’t take it to well when you did side with humanity,” I said, remembering her curse for the first time ever. “Why did you help humanity, Discord? Was it really just because of Fluttershy? I’ve always been curious.”
Discord smirked and snapped his fingers, summoning up a globe of the earth. “I suppose it must seem out to character for me to help a bunch of random creatures. Truth was I didn’t really care about humans at first. I only decided to join their side because I flipped a coin.”
“You... decided to help humanity because of a coin toss?” I asked in disbelief.
“Yup!” Discord said cheerfully, summoning up a giant penny with his head on one side and what looked to be Celestia’s butt on the other; although Celestia’s rear end looked bigger than usual. “If it was heads, I’d help the humans. If it was tails, I’d help the ponies. I got tails.”
“So... why did you then help the humans?” I asked.
“Because I decided before flipping that whatever was the winner I would do the opposite just for the lols,” he giggled before dismissing the penny and spinning the globe. “But I am glad that I did help the humans. Not because they almost worship me like a living god for all I’ve done for them, but they are the most chaotic creatures I have ever seen. They are so different from each other and do so many amazing things. They can be stupid and smart at the same time. Good and evil. Swayed by logic and emotion. They can invent, create, and dream of things the likes of which even I never thought of, and I am Chaos itself.” He tossed the globe into a basketball hoop that wasn’t there originally. “Bottom line, humans are chaotic. How can I not love such a species that has such amazing and disorderly things like Twitter?”
He smiled at me for a bit before clearing his throat. “But back to the manner at hand. You know you won’t be alone when she finally dies, Spike.”
I closed my eyes and growled. “She’s the last of my family, Discord.”
“What about Fluttershy? Her kids? Aren’t they your family?”
“And they’ll die one day too. I’m a dragon, in case you decided to play dice with your eyes again!” I got up and stomped my way to the window where I looked down and saw only ponies and humans. “I’m going to live for hundreds, if not a thousand years! A thousand years watching ponies and humans live and die while I stay here on this planet without anybody to outlive me. Even you said you’ll one day die in a hundred or so years, but not me! Not unless I kill myself and I promised Twilight I wouldn’t do that!”
I gritted my teeth as a tear dripped down my cheek. “I’ll be alone. That’s the one thing I’m scared of the most. I’ve lost most of my friends, most of those I care about, and my entire species. I’d rather die now then live alone...”
“... So you’re going to just give up on life?” asked Discord, nonchalant.
I turned around and snarled at him. “What would you have me do?!”
“Do what I’m doing.”
I snorted. “What? Go around and glorify in my greatness?”
“Very funny, but I was going to say something else.” Discord snapped his fingers and conjured a glass of wine. “Let me ask you something. Everything that’s happened since Equestria arrived on earth from the Conversion Bureau to the war itself and the aftermath. Everything has changed for both humanity and ponies. It will continue to do so for the next one hundred or so years. Obviously as time goes on some parts of history will be lost, and lessons will be forgotten.” Discord took a small sip of his wine as I slowly looked back at him. “History books are written by the victors, and sometimes the smaller, yet important, details are forgotten. Mostly because of those who once lived in such a time are gone. Yet, the two of us are long lasting in life. You’ll live longer then me, granted, but that makes the task even more important for you.”
“... you want me to remind everyone what was lost?” I asked.
“I want you to be the one to tell everyone’s story,” answered Discord, taking another sip. “Twilight’s. Celestia’s. Luna’s. Your friends. Those who lost. Those who won. Those who died. All the stories that are filled with actual facts instead of what the historians will put down. Most likely something pro-human or what not.”
“Well, we are the bad guys,” I muttered, grimly. “The graveyards filled with those we killed? The cities we have left as ghost towns? The thousands in therapy or suicide watch because of the trauma they got from turning into a pony and back again? How can we be anything but the bad guys? Even if we were to tell the world Celestia did it for us to survive our world’s apocalypse I doubt many would care.”
“Then make sure it never happens again,” said Discord, finishing his drink. “Make sure ponies and humans learn from this. Teach them. Teach them to grow and learn. Teach them to realize that deep down humans and ponies are the same. Teach them the lessons that Twilight and her friends preached but failed to follow when it came down to it. Teach them to build a new world.”
I didn’t say anything. I just closed my eyes and thought about it. A world where humans and ponies could live side by side. There were still going to be humans and ponies out there who would teach their kids to hate. The thought that there were others who wanted more chaos after all the peace we struggled to build. The peace that Twilight nearly killed herself for.
“... Thank you,” I whispered to Discord as a sense of calm came over me as well as a burning fire. I would not let this mistake happen again. I would make sure that all the lives that perished or suffered would know the truth. I will make sure history doesn’t repeat itself and that the peace we pushed for so long shall not be in vain.
“Just being a helpful friend. Now if you excuse me, I’m late for a cameo on the next Doctor Who episode,” said Discord before disappearing with a snap of his fingers.
***
It was determined that Twilight only had a week left. There was nothing left to do but make her comfortable. News got leaked and soon every news station in the world was camped outside the castle, waiting for the announcement that the last Alicorn Princess was gone. Twilight was never alone for a single second with me, Fluttershy, and her family there. Most of us stayed quiet as Twilight slept a lot and ate little, her body getting weaker and weaker. The few times she could stay awake she talked softly with me or Fluttershy.
Feathershy, being the priest that he was, was always muttering prayers for Twilight’s soul. Sometimes the rest of the family joined in. I only did it once.
When the family left to get something to eat on the sixth night, Twilight opened her eyes and turned to me as I sat there, holding her hoof as gently as I could. “S-S-Spike?”
“Yes?” I asked, holding her hoof.
“... do you think... they can ever... forgive me?”
I was silent for a bit before a small smile appeared on my lips. I gently picked up her light body and took her to the windows. The stunned look on her face made my smile increase. Below us, spanning all over Canterlot were lit candles. Human. Pony. Both races who held in vigil for one mare.
One mare who did everything she could to make up years of misery and death. One mare who gave so many their humanity back. One mare who had given Equestria a second chance. A row of mourners who were there to light Twilight’s soul beyond whatever lay after death. Be it heaven or nothing, she would die surrounded in a city that loved her.
Tears dripped down from her eyes as she wept into my shoulder. I gently took her back to her bed and helped her lay on it, covering her with the sheets. Wiping the tears from her eyes, Twilight smiled one last time as she slowly closed her eyes to fall into another deep sleep.
“I’m ready...”
These were the last words she ever spoke to me.
An hour later, she passed away.
She hadn’t looked so peaceful in years.