//------------------------------//
// Part 2, Chapter 5 - Phantoms II 
// Story: Just a Phase 
// by HorseStories 
//------------------------------//

Nothingness. Sweetie Belle had awoken in a seemingly endless void. She did not feel a sensation of floating, nor falling - she was just suspended by the space around her.

So this, Sweetie Belle thought, is death.

In all honesty, she was a little disappointed. She hadn't a clue what she had been expecting, but it would at least have been something. It was a huge letdown to find something so... meaningless.

The void was dark, devoid of any light, yet at the same time it was not black. It lacked any colour whatsoever, failing to meet any description. It was infinite, and it was totally featureless. That was all that could be said about it.

Sweetie Belle wasn't scared; she was well past such emotions. Nor was she angry at having died young, or having lived such a grim life. She had made her choices, right and wrong, and this was where they had taken her. She had crafted her own fate.

So many ifs. If she hadn't taken up Azure's offer, she wouldn't be here. If she hadn't written that note, she wouldn't be here. If Ponyville hadn't found out about her, she wouldn't be here.

But those things had happened. And Sweetie Belle couldn't change that. All she could do now was drift.

It seemed Tartarus had been a myth after all. Unless, of course, this was Tartarus, trapped in an eternal void with nothing but her emotions. Sweetie Belle how long it would take for her to go insane. Time was meaningless here; she could have died ten minutes ago, or ten millennia ago. Impossible to tell.

This didn't seem like the Tartarus ponies talked of. There were no flaming pits, no monsters, no Cerberus. Maybe this was where everypony ended up. A gruesome thought, but not impossible.

Still, if this was Tartarus, it wasn't too awful. At least there was no suffering here. In fact, it was quite peaceful. Her opinion might change in a few centuries, but-

Sweetie Belle's train of thought was cut off by the appearance of a tear in the void. It was pitch black, yet it seemed to shine like the sun in comparison to the aether it floated in, causing Sweetie Belle to flinch and avert her gaze. From the darkness, a pony stepped forward. As Sweetie Belle's eyes adjusted to the brightness, she was able to focus on the pony in front of her, and her jaw dropped.

'Miss Cheerilee?'

Cheerilee stepped forward, filling Sweetie Belle's vision. It was definitely Cheerilee - the coat, mane and cutie mark were all unrecognizable - but she wore an expression Sweetie Belle had never seen before. It was an infinitely mature look, and her eyes seemed to bore into Sweetie Belle, reading her like a book.

'Uh, Miss Chee-'

'I'm not actually Miss Cheerilee, Sweetie Belle'.

The voice that came from Cherilee was new as well. It seemed to come from everywhere at once, with crystal clear pronunciation.

Cheerilee continued: 'I'm not here to explain what I actually am. For our purposes, think of me as a God. I have come, Sweetie Belle, to teach you one last lesson. About hate'.

Sweetie Belle was silent as Cheerilee continued: 'You have hatred within you, Sweetie Belle. Hatred for many ponies - your parents, your sister, your old school friends, and of course, Azure. It is fully understandable why you hate them. Your life has been a short and bitter one, and you are probably glad that it's over. But a major part of dying, Sweetie Belle, is learning to let go of the old world. If you still hold grudges against ponies you knew in life, you can never truly enter death. Do you understand?'

Sweetie Belle nodded cautiously. 'You want me to forgive them all?'

Cheerilee shook her head. 'Forgiveness is not necessary. You must simply prove that you have let go of your hate'.

'And how do I do that?'

'There will come a time when you will have to make a personal sacrifice - you must choose to ignore your hatred, and then you will be free'.

'When? How?'

'I cannot say'.

Sweetie Belle decided to change course. 'What happens then?'

'If you are able to let go of your hatred when this time comes to pass, then you will move on'.

'And if I don't?'

'You will be tethered to life forever, even after death'.

Sweetie Belle considered this. She had no idea what sort of test could possibly present itself here, but it would be easy to spot when it arose. So the question was - was she willing to let go of her grudges? Of course, it made no difference if she did or didn't - Azure had already won, and she could do nothing about that. The only thing she could do now was move on.

But where was she now? None of this made any sense - why would she have to give up her hatred, but not other things - memories, love, other things that tethered her to this world? Was this just an illusion? Perhaps she had already lost her mind.

Perhaps she could ask? 'Where am I now?'

Cheerilee hesitated. 'I can't answer that, Sweetie Belle'.

Sweetie Belle pressed on. 'Why not? I'm already dead, right? So why does it matter?'

Cheerilee's eyes flared. 'What makes you think you have a right to answers? What's so special about you?'

'Why are you getting angry? You're God, right? Can't deal with a simple question?'

Cheerilee roared, slamming her front hooves into the void. Sweetie Belle backed up. Of course, antagonizing God was probably a bad idea, but she had nothing to lose. She certainly wasn't going to forget the ponies who had wronged her in life, so any punishment meted out for this was meaningless - if the worst punishment around was being tied to life for eternity, she would gladly accept it.

As Cheerilee glowered at Sweetie Belle, more cracks, blindingly bright in their blackness, began to appear in the void, accompanied by a horrifically distorted noise. Upon listening closer, Sweetie Belle could make out the voice of a stallion grunting in frustration.

Sweetie Belle turned to face Cheerilee. 'What's going on?'

Cheerilee turned away from Sweetie Belle, head held low. Sweetie Belle rushed up behind her, shaking her while shouting in her ear. 'Cheerilee? I'm sorry! Please tell me what-'

Sweetie Belle grabbed Cheerilee by her head and pulled her face up to hers, recoiling when she saw what was there. Where Cheerilee's kindly  face should have been, Sweetie Belle instead saw a horrific mix of faces, all morphing in and out of recognition. Her Father, Rarity, Apple Bloom, Comet Spark, and finally Azure. Azure's face was a mess - he was sweating profusely, and his normally neat hair was soaked in sweat and mud.

Azure reached out, seizing Sweetie Belle, and lifted her up, up, and out of the void.





Sweetie Belle awoke with a start, coughing and choking on dirt. Rolling over, she spat out as much filth as possible. Above her, she heard Azure laughing with glee.

'Thank Celestia. I thought you'd died. That would have bee a bitch to explain'.

I'm still alive. Sweetie Belle expected to feel relieved, but instead she felt indifferent.

'Well? I was expecting some kind of reaction. Aren't you happy?'

Sweetie Belle lifted her head a fraction. Azure and she were alone. She struggled to speak.

'Why... aren't... I... dead?'

Azure seemed amused by the question. 'Sweetie Belle, I'm not stupid. You're the biggest star I own. Did you really think I'm so vain as to have you killed for making a few jokes?'

As Sweetie Belle laid her head in the dirt, Azure continued. 'For your sake, I will assume your performance was intended to be light-hearted humor, as opposed to an attempt to deliberately humiliate me. But I'm going to warn you now - don't do it again. This little stunt is to send a message - it wasn't real this time, but it could well be the next. Got it?'

Sweetie Belle looked up to Azure and nodded.

'Right. Good. Come on then, I want to get back before sunrise. It's already three in the morning. You're off sick today, so you don't need to worry about practicing. Just get some rest'.





Everything moved like a blur for Sweetie Belle. In the space of two hours, she went from believing she was dead to being locked back up in her room. Azure didn't seem to realize the impact a near-death experience could have on a pony - or perhaps he just didn't care. In any case, Azure clearly expected Sweetie Belle to simply shake this experience off.

Sweetie Belle's earlier bravado had quailed in the face of reality. In it's place, her fear of death had come to reclaim her. Her vision in the earth had terrified her. Of course, it had all been a figment of her imagination, but it still felt like a taste of death. She now knew she could not die, no matter the circumstances.

It was far too late to come to this decision, of course. She had already agreed to kill Azure. If she failed to uphold her part of the deal, she would be killed. If she upheld her part of the deal, she would also be killed.

Of course, Azure was going to die anyway. And the moment he did, she would be in danger, regardless of whether she chose to aid his killers or not. As repulsive as it was, her life depended upon Azure's.

There were three interests to consider. Azure wanted to live, and to keep Sweetie Belle. Azure's enemies wanted to kill Azure, and kill Sweetie Belle. And Sweetie Belle wanted to escape Azure, and kill him if possible. Right now, Azure represented her far better than his enemies. And Azure's enemies believed she was on their side.

So logically speaking, Azure had to win for her to live. And if he was going to do that, he would need her help - somepony his enemies trusted, who was on his side. And if Sweetie Belle helped him, she could try to negotiate his victory on her terms. And she knew what those were.





Sweetie Belle spent her day off practicing in the mirror. She wasn't singing - instead, she was perfecting her composure. There could be no hesitation, no stuttering. She was striking a deal with Azure, not begging for sanctuary.

Azure returned home later than usual that night. Sweetie Belle heard him enter the kitchen, fumble around for a few minutes, and then leave. He headed downstairs, and pushed a plate of food through the flap at the bottom of her door.

'Azure, wait!'

Sweetie Belle usually never spoke to Azure when he delivered her food. Azure didn't react immediately, pausing just as he reached the foot of the stairs.

'Well?'

Sweetie Belle grimaced. 'Sir?'

Azure turned around. 'What is it? If you're going to complain about what I did, then I'm not interes-'

Sweetie Belle cut across him. 'Azure, please listen to me. Somepony is trying to kill you!'

Azure wasn't fazed. 'Nothing new there'.

'But they're really close! They wanted me to do it, and they know-'

Sweetie Belle got no further. Azure let out a roar, and seconds later Sweetie Belle heard the locks on her door clicking open. Azure threw to door open, grabbed Sweetie Belle by the neck, and pinned her to the floor.

'Who? Who the hell is it? And how do they know about you!'

'I-I don't know! There's a lot of them, and the one who asked me to help was that stallion you were arguing with- something about using foals! I swear, that's all I know! They wanted me to poison your food at the Hearth's Warming Eve party, because you were too well guarded!'

'AND YOU SAID YES?'

'Yes! I'm so sorry, please, don't kill me!'

So much for striking a deal.

Azure swore, and picked himself up off Sweetie Belle. Immediately nearly collapsing, he scrambled to his feet, using the side of her bed as a prop. Sensing another attack was imminent, Sweetie Belle seized the opportunity to make her case.

'Azure, I'm only telling you this because I'm on your side!'

That seemed to calm Azure down, enough to get him to sit. 'Why are you helping me? I don't see much mutual interest here'.

'They're going to kill me, aren't they? As soon as you were dead, they would have killed me too. At first, I didn't care, but when I was buried... I don't want to die. Not if it's like that'.

Sweetie Belle wished she would sound a little less pathetic.

'And what makes you think I won't kill you right now? What makes you think I've got anything to lose?'

Sweetie Belle looked up at Azure. He no longer looked angry - instead, he looked stressed, and terrified. It was the most beautiful thing Sweetie Belle had ever seen.

'The ponies you're talking about... If they want me dead, then I'm dead. You're rooting for a corpse'.

Sweetie Belle's blood ran cold. If Azure, with all his connections, couldn't protect himself, she had no chance.

'Azure, they don't know I've told you about all this. They still trust me. So I could help you. If you'll help me'.

Azure drew himself up to full height, eying up Sweetie Belle. 'Why should I help you? Why don't I just kill you now, and go into hiding?'

Sweetie Belle swallowed. 'You said it yourself, Azure. They'll find you. You need them dead, as much as I do'.

Azure exhaled heavily. It seemed to take all of his strength to continue. 'Okay, Sweetie Belle. Let's make a deal'.





Azure collapsed on his bed, exhausted from arguing. Sweetie Belle had behaved like a demanding child, simply repeating the same condition over and over. She wanted to be free, and she wanted Azure to leave her alone. Not that Azure had been expecting any different.

In truth, Azure had suspected his coworkers were planning to murder him for some time now. He had spent much of the past few years planning for his retirement - he had enough wealth to support him for the rest of his life, even without regular income from his operations - both legal and illegal - in Fillydelphia. Normally, ponies like him didn't retire, but worked until their deaths, but that had never appealed to Azure. He was well into middle age, and wanted to spend the rest of his life in comfort. 

And when it came to excuses to retire, an assassination attempt seemed fitting.

Sweetie Belle could have her freedom, for all he cared. She would never turn him in, since she was still a runaway herself. And even if she did, it would be impossible to find him, much more impossible to prove he was Azure Meadows. Besides, Sweetie Belle had saved his life. It seemed only fair she should get another chance at hers.





As Hearth's Warming Eve drew closer, Azure grew more complacent with Sweetie Belle's care, often leaving her door unlocked and not complaining when she wandered around the house. Sweetie Belle assumed this was meant to signal trust between them. Despite this, she spent most of her time locked in her room with the door closed. The familiarity of it was a comfort to her.

Azure took her out of the Flawless Rainbow a week before it Heath's Warming Eve, to condition her for the party. 

'From what you've told me, they plan to have you poison my food before it's served. They're probably only going to give you enough poison to spike one meal, so I'll give you some more. Stick around until we order our meals, and then make up an excuse to leave. They'll assume you're off to poison my food, so it won't look too suspicious. I'll order something distinct, so you know which one is mine'.

Sweetie Belle nodded.

'One last thing - don't try anything. I'm bringing bodyguards along, and you're not leaving until I say you get to. Got it?'

'Yes'.

'Good. Now, the poison I give will be fast acting, so we should see results in a matter of minutes. When everypony is dealt with, you can leave. You're on you own from then on, but if you want my advice, you should stick to Fillydelphia. You've got a reputation there, so it should be easy enough to find work - lots of bars are mimicking your format, and they'll be delighted to have the real deal performing'.

Sweetie Belle nodded.

'And... try to pick more carefully this time. Don't get caught up with another bastard like me. You deserve better than that'.

Sweetie Belle was surprised - she didn't think Azure thought of anypony as more than a pile of dirt - but she didn't say anything.

Azure paused for a moment. 'What I'm trying to say, Sweetie Belle, is that what I did was never a personal-'

Sweetie Belle wasn't about to listen to this. She interrupted with a sneer: 'I don't need your pity, Azure. I don't care why you did what you did. I also don't really care if you feel bad about it. It doesn't change anything - it just irritates me'.

Azure turned away, grimacing. 'You certainly know how to end a deal, Sweetie'.

Sweetie Belle exploded. 'A deal? A DEAL? What the fuck is wrong with you? You don't care, do you? This is normal to you! How many ponies have you done this to?'

Azure jumped back, but quickly regained his composure. 'A few'.

Sweetie Belle's rage was back. Resisting the urge to seize the table lamp and club Azure to death to it, she fought to lower her voice and calm herself. Arguing with Azure at this stage was pointless.

'How do you sleep at night?'

'Very comfortably, thank you'.

No further words came to Sweetie Belle. Instead, she looked pointedly at the floor layout on the table.

'Let's just get this over with. And don't call me Sweetie'.





Hearth's Warming Eve dawned. Sweetie Belle had avoided Azure ever since her outburst, and Azure seemed relieved about this, on all counts. Perhaps he was worried Sweetie Belle might snap and turn him in. Maybe he just didn't want to spend time arguing with her. For whatever reason, he had given her a wide berth until today.

Azure gave her a final briefing before they left. Sweetie was given twelve sachets of to hide poison under her dress. Sweetie wasn't sure what type of poison it was, but Azure gave specific instructions on how to use it.

'It's very important they actually swallow it. Make sure it covers the entire plate, because once they eat it, they'll know in a minute, maybe less. We can't afford to have only some of them die, understand?'

Azure had been deliberately vague as to the nature of the party, other than a brief description of it as 'a sort of elite social gathering. Ponies come from all across Equestria - politicians, actors, designers, businessponies, singers and the like'.

'And criminals?'

Azure shook his head. 'Of course not, Sweetie Belle. When we're at this party, I'm a businesspony. As are the others. We'll be having our own private meal, of course, so that will be our time to strike. It shouldn't be difficult to do this quietly - even if bodyguards are present, they're unlikely to get involved once their employers are dead'.

As Azure finished, a carriage pulled up outside the house. The passenger door opened, and a burly stallion in a tuxedo climbed out.

'All ready, Azure. Ready to leave?'

Sweetie Belle was ushered into the carriage, where she was met by four other stallions, all wearing similar garb. Presumably, this was Azure's security detail. Azure climbed in after her, and the carriage set off.





Almost an hour later, they arrived. Following Azure out, Sweetie Belle was greeted by a glistening mansion. Entire walls of the place seemed to be made of glass, and ponies were everywhere, as far as the eye could see.

'Impressive, no?' Sweetie Belle heard Azure mutter in her ear. 'Stay close to me. I don't want you slipping off'.

Sweetie Belle was far too overwhelmed to even consider such a plan. For years, her experience with large crowds had been limited to the Flawless Rainbow, which could never fit more than a hundred ponies, even at breaking point. Here, ponies numbered in the thousands, and were accompanied by an omnipresent buzz of chatter, laughter and camera flashes.

Azure and Sweetie Belle were escorted to a set of iron gates, where a prim-looking pony ran their names through a list and checked their tickets, finally admitting them with a wave of his hoof.

As they made their way through the crowd and up to the mansion, Sweetie Belle recognized numerous faces, famous ponies from all walks of life. Some stopped to chat to Azure, but none gave her more than a second glace. Sweetie Belle didn't mind - she was quite happy to be left alone - but she resented the way some of them looked at her, like she was Azure's trophy. 

The wave of stimuli hitting her was far worse inside the mansion than it was outside. The chatter of outside was now accompanied by raucous bursts of laughter, raised voices and theatrical shrieks. Sweetie Belle couldn't possibly imagine ponies doing this for fun.

Eventually, they made it into the main building, where they were greeted by a cluster of ponies. Among them was the pony who had initially approached Sweetie Belle with the promise of killing Azure, though he made no sign of recognizing her. Azure wasted no time in greeting them all, and then introducing each one of them to Sweetie Belle. As they all gathered around her, Sweetie Belle heard a whisper:

'Dinner is in three hours. The kitchen is on the bottom floor, in the room next door to this one. Wait until he's ordered, then just sprinkle it into his food'.

As the words were said, she felt something slip into her bag.

As soon as they were out of earshot, Azure turned to Sweetie Belle. 'Did they give you it?'

Sweetie Belle nodded, and opened her bag. Inside was a small sachet, which Azure seized. Scanning the writing on the sachet, his face split into a triumphant grin, and he stuffed the sachet inside his jacket.

'Excellent. Well, it's all up to you now. Meet me at the foot of the main stairs in three hours - and don't be late. Until then, enjoy the party, I guess'.

With that, Azure and his bodyguards vanished into the crowd, leaving Sweetie Belle alone.





Sweetie Belle spent the first twenty minutes of her freedom gorging herself on the buffet, drawing numerous disapproving looks from ponies around her. Compared to the food Azure had fed her, this was a banquet fit for an empress.

When left to wander, she spent most of her time exploring the vast ground floor of the mansion. One room, which Sweetie Belle could only describe as a main hall, had an enormous stage set up, and ponies were swarmed over it, fixing the lights and cleaning the floor. An exhibition? A play? Sweetie Belle could only guess.

She hadn't planned on socializing, and most ponies around her showed no interest, but she was surprised when she was approached by a small group of mares her age. They introduced themselves one by one, but somehow Sweetie Belle found herself completely incapable of remembering their names. 

The mares were all much younger than the rest of the guests, and extraordinarily beautiful, so Sweetie Belle was unsurprised to hear they were attending the event as the invitees of other stallions, eager to socialize with the upper rungs of Equestrian society. Having seen Sweetie Belle come in with Azure, they had assumed she was here for the same purpose.

'So, what's up with the old geezer? Couldn't you get anypony better? Not to brag or anything, but I'm here with Straight Sprint'.

Sweetie Belle blinked.

'The Canterlot Bulls' quarterback? You know, the hoofball team? You do know who he is, right?'

Sweetie Belle cringed and turned away. Mustering all her strength, she was able to produce a tiny squeak. 'I-I don't really pay attention to hoofball... or o-other sports'.

'Uh, okay. Anyway, you should really set your standards higher. You're waaay prettier than me, so I don't see why you had to stick with that guy. Is he loaded, or something?'

'N-No! I-It's not like that, he's actually m-my friend...'

The mares around her burst into laughter.

'Yeah, right!'

'Pull the other one. Come on, you don't need to make up excuses. We're all doing it, right?'

No. I'm not like you.

Sweetie Belle wasn't sure why she couldn't say the words out loud. She had no problem standing up to Azure earlier, but when it came to dealing with mares her own age, she couldn't even rebuke them? Then again, when was the last time she'd met a mare her own age? Instead of reply, she lowered her head and stared fixedly at the floor.

The group were beginning to look frustrated, and eventually the who seemed to be leading them gave Sweetie Belle a wide, sympathetic smile, turned, and headed off, with her group in trail.

Sweetie Belle turned to leave, but before she could go, she heard the group of mares laughing between themselves.

'What a freak!'

'Pumpkin, shut up!'

'Why? I don't care if she hears. Hey, that old dude's probably her dad or something!'

The entire group exploded in laughter as Sweetie Belle left the room.

The attractions laid around the mansion now seemed grayer, less interesting than before. The ponies around her no longer seemed to be ignoring her - instead, they were staring, pointing, laughing.

Doing her best to ignore everypony around her, Sweetie Belle found herself wandering back into the main hall. An announcer was onstage, speaking rapidly into a microphone, and ponies had gathered around to listen. As Sweetie Belle approached the stage, the lights dimmed and spotlights around the stage flickered on.

'... and gentlecolts, we welcome you to the Equestrian Winter fashion tour! This event tonight is bought to you by some of the biggest names in Equestria, from Canterlot to Manehattan, as well as exotic displays from the Crystal Empire and even some Griffon fashion modified for ponies...'

You sure know how to kiss your own ass, Sweetie Belle thought. Around her, the cooing and gasping of the ponies seemed to falter somewhat.

'Did he say Griffon fashion?'

'Calling it "fashion" is a bit much. I can't see them needing any clothes other than armour, given how violent they all seem'.

'Well, what would you expect from mountain savages?'

The stallion onstage had clearly picked up on these remarks, because he swiftly changed the topic.

'Of course, we've got something for everyone! But first, we'd like to open our event with a display by an Equestrian rising star! Cue it!'

The room was immersed in blackness for a split second, and then the stage was lit up with harsh white lighting. For the first time, Sweetie Belle got a good look at the stage, and was able to make out the outline of a catwalk. Two ponies emerged from the velvet curtains at the mouth of the stage, both dressed in exquisite dresses. Above the stage, a screen flashed up with a single word: 'LOTUS'. Presumably, the name of the line.

The display took twenty minutes, but for Sweetie Belle that time flew by. The dresses were not just beautifully crafted - they gave Sweetie Belle a feeling she had not felt in a long time. The sense of familiarity, of nostalgia.

Like a bird returning to roost.

And the moment that thought swam through her head, the gears in her brain began to spin, faster than they ever had in her life, and Sweetie Belle knew what was going on, knew she had made a terrible mistake coming here. She was already reeling from shock before the announcer even spoke up.

'Everypony, could we all get a big hoof for the designer - Rarity!'