//------------------------------// // Hitting the Human World for the First Time... as Far As anypony else (aside from Luna) knows, anyhow *wink* // Story: It's A Screwed Up Life // by Autum Breeze //------------------------------// Hitting the Human World for the First Time... as Far As anypony else (aside from Luna) knows, anyhow *wink* ___________________________________________________________ I sigh, looking out the window as the train pulls into the Crystal Empire. It’s been a week since my... incident. It took a lot of work, even after Luna helped me out, to get me back to a better state. Of course, Spoiled didn’t help at all in that, but Diamond and Daddy made up for what she didn’t do. And if you’re wondering why Daddy doesn’t find it odd that the mother of one of his daughters didn’t put any effort into helping their suffering child out of what could probably be considered depression, regardless of how brief it ended up being, she was spending every day at school, apparently doing work that had backloaded on her and was making it impossible to return home to help. And yeah, if you called bullshit on that, you’re right. I had the changeling who stayed here in Ponyville check in on it for me and found out she’d been spending that time at the spa, relaxing from all the stress my, and I am using her words here, “being a whiny crybaby” was causing her. But, anyway, after the week ended and I found out Twilight has the Princess Summit at the Crystal Empire, I was wondering if I should tag along, only to end up being invited by Celestia herself. So, here we are, walking through the Empire to Cadance and Shining Armour’s castle for the summit. “Um, Screwball?” I glance to Rarity as I float along in the air, the unicorn having stayed back to speak with me. “Yeah?” “I do hope this doesn’t seem rude, darling,” Rarity begins, looking uncertain, “but why exactly did Princess Celestia invite you along for the summit. I mean, I can understand us and Spikey, we are the Element Bearers and he’s Twilight son, but why you?” I roll my eyes. “Hello, Princess of Chaos? Thought that was pretty obvious, Rarity.” It’s not an official title or anything, but Celestia and I have spoken about it and she does agree that I have a right to such a title. I hear the sound of a transformer and see it’s Pinkie uncurling herself and smirk. “Besides, Twilight’s considered a princess, even without her crown.” “Hmm?” Rarity turns, looks at Twilight, before rushing over, myself smirking as the scene plays out. A few minutes later, we walk into the castle throne room and Twilight bumps into you know damn well who. Easy, Screwball. Don’t attack him or do anything punishing to him. He’s not the one who makes Twilight cry in the second movie. That is human Flash. Do not hurt this one. Breathe. Breathe. Cadance laughs happily after Twilight is announced and comes down from her throne. “Twilight!” She reaches us and I blink as they do their normal greeting of the Sun Shine dance. I don’t remember that happening in the movie. “I haven't seen you since the coronation!” Well, that was only a little over a week ago. It’s not that long. Cadance makes it sounds like months. I never did get that, watching the movie and it makes even less sense to me now. Celestia smiles at all of us. “We have so much to discuss. But it can wait until tomorrow. You all look tired from your journey. Now, off to bed, all of you.” “My guards will show you to your rooms,” Cadance says and the guards all nod, including you know who. But, he isn’t the one guiding Twilight, so I’ll let it slide. Instead of going to bed, I stay up though. I don’t feel like sleeping, one because I’ve been thinking about what Luna and I discussed about the human Blessed Moon and how I’ll be needing to handle that within the next three days and two, I’m actually really excited. I’m going to be able to go to the Equestria Girls world without it being questioned. I’ll even be able to go to Canterlot High now. You have no idea how hard it was to resist going in my Nyx disguise before the whole Blessed Moon indecent. “Stop! Thief! She's stolen my crown!” Whelp, sounds like Sunset Shimmer’s made her appearance. I teleport into the room with the mirror just in time to see Twilight’s crown disappear through the reflective surface. “What did you do with my crown?” Twilight demands of the yellow unicorn. Sunset Shimmer sneers at Twilight. “Sorry it had to be this way... Princess.” She teleports to the mirror, then goes through. “Who was that?” Fluttershy asks, looking around at all of us. I frown. Why the heck is she asking us? I mean, when watching the movie it makes it sense for the transition, but right now, since none of them know I know, it just doesn’t make sense that she’d ask us about this. Suddenly, that sound of galloping hoofsteps comes from outside and we all turn to see several guards, including the one Sunset Shimmer got past, hurrying into the room. “Your Highness,” one of the guards says, looking around in both stern worry and confusion, “what happened? We heard shouting.” “Well, you lot sure took your sweet time,” I find myself saying without thinking. “Ya,” Dash backs me, glaring at them. “What kind of guards allow a unicorn to sneak into the castle and steal one of their princesses’ crowns?” “Uh...” all four glance at each other, clearly not sure how to respond to that. I facehoof. “Look, just go get Celestia, Luna and Cadance.” I’m about to also mention Shining Armour, as it is kind of weird that he didn’t make an appearance despite it being a Princess Summit, ya know, since he lives in the castle too, but then again, he likely is going to chew these guards out for letting Sunset Shimmer get away with Twilight’s crown, which would explain why he didn’t show up when Celestia was explaining about Sunset to the others. The guards look like they’re about to protest, likely because they were being ordered by me, Discord’s sort of progeny, but a fireball suddenly hovering above my forehoof makes them change their minds and they hurry off to get the three Alicorns. ___________________________________________________________ “So, just who was that pony anyway?” Rainbow Dash asks after Twilight and the others finish recounting the events of what happened to the three older Alicorns. Princess Celestia sighs. “Sunset Shimmer. A former student of mine. She began her studies with me not long before Twilight. But when she did not get what she wanted as quickly as she liked, she turned cruel and dishonest.” She gets up from next to Cadance’s throne and walks towards us. “I tried to help her, but she eventually decided to abandon her studies and pursue her own path. One that has sadly led to her stealing your crown." Well, technically, you dismissed her as your student, but whatever. “She replaced Twilight's with this one,” Spike says, showing the fake crown. Celestia studies it for a brief moment. “I suppose Sunset Shimmer thought you wouldn't notice right away that this was not yours. And by the time you did, it would be too late to go after your crown and Element of Harmony.” Twilight looks uncertain. “But I don't understand. Where did she go? Why did she take the crown? Celestia walks past, indicating for us all to follow. “You'll soon know more about this place than even I do.” We head back to the room with the mirror and Luna walks up to it. “This is no ordinary mirror. It is a gateway to another world. A gateway that opens once every thirty moons.” Pinkie Pie puts her hoof the tiniest bit into the portal. “Sparkly!” Luna rolls her eyes and continues to explain as Pinkie seems to just slide along the floor until she’s standing next to Applejack. “It has always been kept in the throne room of Canterlot Castle. But when Princess Cadance took over the Crystal Empire, we sent it here for her to watch over.” Celestia sighs. “I had always hoped that Sunset Shimmer would someday use it to return, to come back to Equestria seeking my guidance. Obviously, this is not what has happened.” Gee, ya think? I can’t help rolling my eyes. Thank you, Princess Obvious. I sit back in the air, watching the scene play out like in the movie. As Twilight’s about to enter the portal, however, I notice Spike isn’t showing the signs from the movie that he’ll just run forward after her. Looks like I need to coax him a little. Floating down next to the drake, I nudge him. “You know, Celestia said the girls couldn’t go. She never said anything about you, Spike.” He looks to me, uncertainly. “Yeah, but, she doesn’t need me, right?” I inwardly frown. Jeez, seems this guy needs the ego boast being the hero of the Crystal Empire gives him after all. Talk about having a self-esteem problem. I inwardly sigh. Looks like I’ll have to be a bit manipulative as well, dang it. “But, Twilight’s entering a whole other world. We don’t know what could be in there. Snakes, evil demons...” I see the nervousness appear in his eyes, “and she’ll be all alone over there. No friends, no family, nopony who even knows her. I mean, for or all we know, she could be in danger the moment she passes through the other side of the—” And that does it. Spike panics and runs past everypony, despite their shouts and disappears through the portal. A quick teleport and I appear in front of it. “Don’t worry,” I smirk. “I’ll keep an eye on ’em.” And before any of them can protest, I pass through the portal myself. It definitely feels different than when I just teleport between the dimensions. I feel my body being twisted and stretched as I’m changed to match the other world. As I tumble out of the portal, I land on my feet and stand up straight, stretching. Looking myself over, I’m wearing my usual choice of attire for this world when I’m being me. Good. No need to change anything then. A groan causes me to look down to my left to see Twilight kneeling, with Spike as the little puppy he turns into here standing in front of her. “Uh, Twilight?” he says uncertainly. “Huh? Spike!” she says, cocking an eyebrow. “You're not supposed to— Spike? Are you a... dog?” Spike turns around in a circle, before looking to her. I... think so. But I have no idea what you are! “Huh?” Twilight looks down at her new hands and screams. Spike scratches behind his ear with a rear paw as Twilight continues to study her new body, I finding myself snickering a few times. Spike sighs. “Twilight, you have to get it together!” Twilight does some heavy breathing, before putting her hands on the ground, curled into fists, then sighs. “What... does the rest of me look like?” Spike frowns in confusion. “Um, like you. Only not you. Your muzzle's really small.” Twilight’s eyes widen. “My muzzle?!” She puts a hand to her nose and looks like she’s about to scream again. She’s stopped by Spike putting his paws over her mouth. “Are you gonna scream again?” Twilight shakes her head “Relax, Twi,” I say, putting my hands behind my head, causing the other two to realize I’m here for the first time, “you’ve just turned into a human. Nothing to lose your hair over.” Twilight frowns. “Human?” I nod, before glancing around, smirking. They look around too, Spike asking, “Where are we? Twilight gets up and moves back to the mirror “I don't know. But that must serve as the gateway back to Equestria,” she says as she passes her arm through the mirror, seeing a reflection of her hoof through it, before pulling her arm back out and shaking her head. “We need to find my crown as soon as possible and get back there.” Turning she looks up at Canterlot High. “I suggest we start searching the castle first.” Now, I could be the nice girl and tell her it’s actually a high school... but, come on. Princess of Chaos? I’ve gotta still have some fun, right? Spike shrugs, before hopping up onto Twilight’s back. “Works for me.” Twilight starts the most awkward gallop I’ve seen yet, whilst I just walk at a normal pace, easily keeping up with her, especially when she stops at the sight of that dude with his dog. “Yeah, I don't think that's how the new you is supposed to—” Spike begins, only to be cut off as Twilight quickly hops up and waves sheepishly to the guy. Once he leaves, I have to resist bursting into laughter as I watch Twilight struggle to keep her balance on two legs, before she reaches the stairs and grabs the railing. “C'mon, Spike, Screwball. I do not wanna be like this for longer than I have to.” Spike and I follow her up, Spike bounding up the stairs. “Well, look on the bright side. You don't have those pesky wings to worry about anymore.” Twilight frowns at him, then stands up straight and walks right into the door. She frowns, grunts, then her eyes widen. “My magic! It isn't working!” “Makes sense,” she looks down at Spike. “You don't exactly have your horn.” “What?!” the purple girl cries, grabbing her hair and pulling it back, trying to see her horn. Spike taps the door open. “We really need to find you a mirror.” We walk in, Twilight and Spike glancing around in uncertainty, whilst I’m honestly squeeing as quietly as I can. Twilight walks over to the cabinet with the school prizes and trophies. “What do ya think, guys? Other artifacts she's stolen from Equestria?” she finally notices her reflection in the glance and gasps. “What am I?” Suddenly the school bell rings and all the students start moving out of their classes. “Huh? Oof!” Twilight says, then grunts as she’s smacked in the face by human Diamond Tiara’s cell phone as she and Silver Spoon walk past. I smirk. “And that’s my cue. Catch ya later, Twilight.” “Wait, what—?” Twilight cries, but I’m already gone. I’ve been waiting too long to speak with this world’s Diamond Tiara and I am not missing my chance to do so now. Plus, with my absence, you can guaranty things will play out as they should, leading to Twilight encountering human Fluttershy and Sunset Shimmer and that play out right. I’ll meet up with her again after lunch. I follow Diamond and Silver, keeping my distance until they’ve stopped at Tiara’s locker. I quickly snap my fingers, thankfully, it seems being turned human by the portal doesn’t cut off my Chaos Magic like it does Twilight and Sunset’s magic and I turn invisible as Twilight walks past, looking around in confused fascination. Once she and Spike are gone, I make myself visible again and walk up beside them. For several minutes I just lean against the locker, listening to Diamond and Silver talk. Finally, after what feels like forever, Diamond takes notice that I haven’t moved. “Um, can we help... you?” her frown of annoyance turns to confusion as Silver turns to look at me too. “Do I... know you?” I smirk. “Kinda. How’s your sister’s recovery going?” Tiara’s eyes widen in shock and I snicker. “Come on, why is it so surprising I’d ask that, Dia? Your family’s been all over the news since daddy dearest was exposed and arrested.” Now her glare returns. “Are you making fun of what my father did to my family?” I snort. “Hardly. I was the one who ratted out that bastard in the first place.” They both glance at each other, before giving me a skeptical look. “So, you hacked into Filthy Rich’s accounts to show the police and get him searched?” Silver asks, her tone saying she clearly did not believe me and was not amused. I nod. “How else could Dr. Discord have gotten those files he’d been hiding about Lilac? Getting them was easy with my magic.” Their unamusement sky rockets. “Is this some game to you?” Diamond snarls. “Magic? Seriously?” I grin, snapping my fingers and take on my Nyx, or rather, Blessed Moon appearance. The two blink, confused. I snap my fingers again, returning to normal. “Need more proof?” Diamond’s phone starts ringing. She looks to the caller ID, frowns, then answers it. “Hello?” “Yeah, how’s it?” I ask, my voice echoing out of her phone. They both look to me, only to see my holding my hand to my ear with my fingers in a position of pretending to have a phone to my ear. They look from me, to Diamond’s phone, to each other, then me again, before both asking, “Who are you?” “Kinda easy and hard to explain that one, sis,” I grin, closing my eyes. There’s silence for several moments. “Lilac?!” I open my eyes again, with a shit eating grin even bigger. “Half right, Dia. Wanna get the full story?” They both nod slowly, their expressions dumbstruck. ___________________________________________________________ “I... wow,” Diamond says as we sit at the table in the cafeteria. “That’s just... wow.” I nod, taking a bite out of the hamburger I got for lunch. “I know, right?” I say through it. “So, you’re magic works, even here in our world?” Silver Spoon asks. I swallow and nod, before doing a Big Mac impression. “Eeyup.” Both girls actually look towards the table where the blonde haired Apple is sitting with the human CMC, before looking back to see me grinning. “So, if you’re here to get the crown back, why don’t you just use your magic?” Diamond asks, cocking an eyebrow at me. I shrug, returning to my voice. “Don’t tell anyone else, but even being’s of chaos have rules they need to follow. And I need to let certain events play out, or else something could go really wrong later on. For the most part, I’m free to do as I wish, but there are key events I’m not allowed to stop and that must happen.” “Like what?” Silver asks, taking a bite of her salad. I look to Diamond. “Like making sure Twilight wins Princess of the Fall Formal, not Sunset Shimmer.” Both girls react as you’d expect to that. Silver Spoon half chokes on her food and Diamond, who was drinking a glass of juice at the time, does a spit take. “She’s going up against Sunset Shimmer?!” Diamond asks as I pat Silver on the back. “Is she out of her mind? Doesn’t she know what happened to the girl who went up against her in the Spring Fling?” I shrug. “She doesn’t care. She needs to win that crown. If we don’t get it back, Equestria’s pretty much screwed.” And I’m not even talking about Tirek here. Without the Elements, Equestria’s screwed when Discord’s Plunder Plants grow. Diamond gets a nervous look, before glancing around. “Trust me, my dimensional sister,” I say assuredly. “Help us out, and I promise Sunset won’t get back at you for it. If she even tries, she’ll have to deal with me. That’s something I can easily do.” I wink at Silver. “Same to you, Silver. She won’t be able to harm either of you.” They both look uncertainly at me, then each other, before slowly nodding. “Okay,” Diamond sighs. “We’ll do what we can.” I grin appreciatively. “Thanks, sis. Trust me, we’ll need the help. Twi’s hopeless as a human.” We all turn at that moment to see Twilight take an apple in her mouth, not realizing that, as a human, she can’t eat like as a pony. “You’re right,” Silver says flatly. “She is hopeless.” ___________________________________________________________ “Hey, Twi,” I say as I meet up with Twilight after she’s signed up for the Princess of the Fall Formal. “And where have you been this whole time?” she demands, looking at me irritably. I shrug. “I went to talk with Diamond. Did you know this world’s version of her sister is in hospital too?” I ask, fanning ignorance and surprise. “She’s not as up with things as me, but then, she didn’t have Discord pour Chaos Magic into her brain, so I guess it works, right?” “Um, sure?” Twilight asks, glancing at Spike. “And don’t worry, I’ve signed us in as official students of Canterlot High,” I sigh, snapping my fingers to show our enrolment papers. Gonna be quite amusing once Sci-Twi is attending. They’ll have to distinguish them by Twilight’s Princess title alone. “Um, why?” Spike asks, confused. I roll my eyes. “Yeah, because two new students turning up, one of whom wins a social event, yet don’t appear in the school record system won’t raise any eyebrows.” I let that sink in, before both human and dog go, “Oh.” “Now that’s settled, let’s move on to our lockers,” I say, pointing a head and marching down the hall, chuckling at the groan and facepalming I hear my antics cause. We walk down the hallway until we find two lockers near a broken light, one hanging open, the other not. Though, why Twilight even goes to the locker in the movie I never understood, even now. she’s not putting her bag away, so why, other than the confrontation with— “Can't believe I didn't recognize you earlier.” Speak of the soon to be a raging she-demon and she will appear. Sunset walks over to us, smugness practically oozing off of her. “Shoulda known Princess Celestia would send her prized pupil here after my crown, and her little dog, too.” “It's my crown!” Twilight states, pointing to herself. Sunset Shimmer shrugs. “Whatever. This is just a minor setback for me. You don't know the first thing about this place, and I already rule it.” Twilight glares. “If that's so, why do you even need my crown? You went to an awful lot of trouble to switch it with the one that belongs here.” Sunset turns around, smirking. “Pop quiz: what happens when you bring an Element of Harmony into an alternate world?” Twilight looks away and Sunset scoffs. “You don't know? Seriously?” “And you're supposed to be Princess Celestia's star student? Then again, what were the chances she'd find somepony as bright as me to take under her wing after I decided to leave Equestria? Bit embarrassing that you were the best she could do.” “At least she actually understood Celestia’s lessons,” I smirk, causing Sunset to take notice of me for the first time, her eyebrow rising in slight confusion. “After all, last I checked, Twilight’s the Alicorn Princess and you’re the dropout that Celestia tossed out.” Sunset’s eyes widen and she snarls. “And just who’re you?” I snicker. “Somepony who clearly knows more than you, Sunset. Then again, anypony could know more than you. Even the pony Snips and Snails are better than you. By the way, how did you recognize Twilight’s shitty handwriting? Past experience? Did you do a report on that book before you figured handwriting out yourself?” Oh ho ho, the anger in her expression. I know she’s gonna go good by the end of this, but this is too priceless. Just when it looks like Sunset’s gonna burst, she calms down. “Whatever. So another pony followed you and you lucked into being a princess. You still won’t get the crown back.” To this, Spike growls. Sunset’s smirk widens a bit. “Oh, and I'd keep an eye on your mutt. Hate for him to be... taken away from you.” Spike shakes his paw like a fist. “Is that a threat?” “Oh, of course not,” Sunset says, lifting his chin with a finger. Spike snaps at her, before barking. Sunset easily avoids being bitten. “But I'd cut down on the chatter if I were you. Don't want everyone to know you don't belong here, now would you?” she turns and starts to walk away. “You wanna be a princess here? Please. You don't know the first thing about fitting in.” ___________________________________________________________ “Sunset Shimmer is right,” Twilight says as we walk down the hall after the whole vending machine scene. “I don't know the first thing about this place. If I'm gonna really fit in and win votes, we need to do some research.” Spike cocks an eyebrow. “Research?” Twilight nods. “This place has a school. I have to believe it's got a...” we stop in front of a room filled with computers and books, “library!” I know Snip and Snails have followed us. This is one thing I wish I could stop, but it’s why the rest of the Human 5 minus Rainbow Dash meet up with Twilight together. I can’t help back groan when Twilight starts thumping her fist on the keys, nor when she picks up a book with her mouth, shaking my hand, currently holding a book, to get her to stop, nor when she doesn’t use the photo copier properly and nearly blinds herself. After what feels like forever of Twilight, Spike and I doing research, myself namely just interested in this world’s Canterlot’s history, a voice on P.A. system speaks up. “The library will be closing in five minutes.” Twilight yawns, before gasping. “I hadn't even thought about where we're gonna sleep tonight!” Spike looks up from the book he was reading, then to me and we wink. “Way ahead of you.” We follow Spike up to a higher area and I snap my fingers, making two, five star class hotel beds appear in the space between the two bookshelfs either side of us. “It’s a bit dusty, but it doesn’t seem anyone comes up here that often,” he grins. “Plus, I can just poof it all away when we wake up tomorrow,” I grin, leaping into the air and plopping down on my bed. Twilight smiles before moving over to her bed. “It's perfect, guys. Thanks and... wait.” She turns to me, her eyes wide and accusing. “I just realized. You can use your magic here?” I stretch my upper body forward like a snake and tap Twilight on the head. “Hello-oh. Being of Chaos, Twilight. Does it really surprise you that I still go against the logic of even this world?” Twilight holds up a finger, clearly about to answer, then frowns and shakes her head. “Never mind. And I’m assuming you’ve your reasons for not just teleporting my crown back to me now?” I nod. She rolls her eyes. “Fine.” “So, how did your research go?” Spike asks, clearly trying to steer away from this topic fast. Twilight smiles and show him a book. “I found this book. It's called a yearbook. It seems to be something they use to keep a record of things that have happened at the school.” I roll my eyes. “You mean, like back in Equestria. Jeez, Twi, it’s not that different from home.” Twilight blinks, before blushing. “A-anyway, look.” I hover over and look above to look over her shoulder as she points to a photo of the human versions of the Element Bearers during their freshmen year.“That's Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Fluttershy, and I'm gonna bet the girl on the far right is Rarity.” Spike grabs the book, his tail wagging. “There's a Rarity here!? Uh, I mean, uh...” he stutters as we both give him sly smiles, “interesting photo.” Twilight takes the book back. “It's interesting because they look like they're friends.” Spike cocks his head. “They do look like our friends. But I thought we'd figured that out already.” Twilight and I shake our heads. “No, I mean... they look like they're friends with each other. But it doesn't seem like they're friends now.” Spike looks away. “Not so much.” Twilight flops back in her bed and I do mine, despite having flopped whilst above her bed. You wanna question that? “I just can't help but get the feeling that Sunset Shimmer had something to do with it.” Spike grumbles as he settles down next to Twilight. “I wouldn't put it past her. But she wanted your crown 'cause she's planning on doing something even worse! If you're gonna stop her, you have to focus on making friends here. Can't worry about why these girls aren't friends anymore. Even if they,” he yawns, “do remind you of your Ponyville friends.” Twilight smiles and scratches behind his ear. “You're right, Spike.” She sighs, looking up at the sky through the glass roof. “Eye on the prize. Goodnight, Spike. Goodnight, Screwball.” I yawn, stretching out under my beds warm covers. “Night, you two. See ya in the mornin’.” ___________________________________________________________ We’re already awake the next morning when Principal Celestia’s voice comes over the P.A. system. “Good morning, students, and happy Thursday. Just a reminder to pick up your ballots for the Princess of the Fall Formal today. They are due at the time the dance starts tomorrow night, so don't forget to turn them in and make your voice heard.” “Fluttershy said I'd need to win over all those different groups if I wanna become Princess of the Fall Formal,” Twilight says as we walk down from our sleeping area, now absent of our beds. “So I've compiled a list of talking points.” Spike laughs. “You made a list? That's so unlike you!” when Twilight gives him a frown, holds open her backpack and points into it, he laughs again, though nervously this time. “Uh... Please... Continue,” he says, hopping inside. Twilight smiles. “I'll start introducing myself, sprinkle in some things I learned about their world into the conversation—” “Which, thankfully, I discussed with her so she doesn’t say something stupid like,” I change my voice to Twilight’s and stop in front of said girl, “Hi, I’m Twilight Sparkle. Cars drive on the road and I’d like to be princess of the Fall Formal.” Spike snickers, though Twilight just groans, before continuing on like I hadn’t said anything. “Show them how I fit in here!” she stops in front of the doors and sighs. “Okay, Spike, Screwball. Time to make a good first impression on my fellow students. The whole world sorta depends on it.” We walk out and the students we pass snicker. Twilight glances around, before looking to me and Spike. “Why is everybody looking at me funny? Whoa!” she cries as we’re suddenly yanked into one of the classrooms. “What're you...? Why did you...? Rarity?” Said girl hurries over, measures both of us, before reaching into her bag and somehow slipping on two new outfits on us. Twilight’s is the green one you see in the movie, along with the blonde wing. Mine, however, takes me way off-guard. I’m practically dressed like Blessed Moon, only I’ve still my skin colour and eyes. “Perfect!” the alabaster girl says, looking us over. “Oh, yes. This is good! No one will recognize you!” Twilight frowns in confusion. “Why wouldn't I wanna be—?” And the scene plays out as you’d expect. Applejack, Pinkie and Fluttershy all come in, show the video to Twi, then we all head off to deal with the AJ/RD situation. Of course, the soccer match between Twi and Dash plays out as you’d expect, but I then challenge Dash myself and give her a run for her money, and barely using my Chaos Magic to win at all. Later that day, we perform (yes, I said we, who do you think AJ was pointing to when she didn’t appear on screen in the movie) the Cafeteria Song and get everyone siked and together in school spirit. The next day when we arrive, everyone is acting as they do at the beginning of Rainbow Rocks, accepting of each other and not letting their clicks get in the way of things. I pull away from the group and follow Sunset, before hurrying ahead and seeing Flash isn’t heading in the right direction to see the ruined gym. A little nudge with my magic and he found himself walking past the gym just in time to think something is up. Why am I helping Flash? Well, we need that damned scene where Twi hugs him in Luna’s office and he gets depressed when he thinks Twilight shuts him down. I did it for that latter reason. When Twilight comes racing into Rarity's boutique and runs into one of the changing rooms, I give a sheepish smile to the girls and hurry in after her. A little over a minute later and Spike and I have convinced to her tell the others the truth. When she opens the curtains, it shows all the girls have gathered in front, looks of concern on each of their faces. “You okay?” Applejack asks. “The Fall Formal isn't happening tonight,” Twilight says. “WHAT!?” Pinkie Pie screams. I nod and lean against the wall, looking at them sideways. “It had to be postponed because Sunset Shimmer had Snips and Snails ruin all of Pinkie Pie's decorations.” If not for knowing how this goes, the expression Pinkie gets for her second “WHAT?!?” would really make me fear for our safety. Oh, who am I kidding? When Pinkie’s involved in either world, I should fear for our safety. “But the Fall Formal has to happen tonight,” Twilight insists. “Wha—!” Pinkie begins, only for Applejack to cover her mouth, halting her third, though less explainable outburst and the girls look to us, waiting for the explanation as to why Twilight said what she said. Twilight sighs, holding and arm. “You see...” Pinkie Pie pulls Applejack’s hand off of her mouth, “You’re from an alternate world and you're a pony princess there and the crown actually has a magical element embedded in it that helps power up other magical elements, and without it they don't work anymore, and you need them all to help protect your magical world, and if you don't get the crown tonight, you'll be stuck in this world and you won't be able to get back for, like, a really, really long time!” she finishes with a squee. While Twilight and Spike stare at her open mouthed, I just smirk. Rainbow Dash gives Pinkie a look that says, this clearly is Pinkie just being Pinkie. “Yeah, I'm pretty sure that isn't the reason.” Spike shakes his head, a deadpan stare on his face “Nope, she's pretty much spot-on.” “He can talk!?” Rarity cries. Spike nods and walks forward. “Oh, yeah! And back where I come from, I'm not even a dog! I'm a ferocious, fire-breathing dragon!” I snort. “Fire-breathing, yeah, but ferocious? Get real, Spike.” Fluttershy doesn’t give him a chance to snap back, jumping in front of him. “This is so amazing! Tell me, what are you thinking right now?” Spike looks from her to Rarity and walks over to the alabaster human. “Sure would love a scratch behind the old ears!” “Gah...” Rarity says, just staring down. “Uh, maybe later,” Spike scratching his head sheepishly. Yeah, like when her brain’s had a chance to reboot after logic just spat in her face. Twilight turns to Pinkie. “How did you know all that?” Pinkie shrugs “Just a hunch.” “Wait a minute!” Applejack says, holding up her hands. “Lemme get this straight. You're a pony?” “You're a princess?” Rarity says, still not having recovered. “You're from another world?” Fluttershy asks. Twilight gulps. “Mm-hmm.” “And in case you girls don’t believe that, which I wouldn’t blame you, even with the talking dog,” I smirk, snapping my fingers. Suddenly, they’re all wearing the outfits from in the cafeteria. Another snap and they’re back to their previous attire. “Any other questions?” “That... is... awesome!” Dash cries and they all come over, asking pretty much any question you can think of in regards to Equestria. We then head back to the school and see the mess Snips and Snails made and... jeez, they went overboard. If you’ve seen the movie, trust me, it doesn’t even do the damage justice. But we all pull up our sleeves and get to work cleaning up, eventually bringing in everyone else to help clean up and break down even more social barriers. If you remember how those two jocks’ jaws drops when they saw AJ carrying that board all on her own, their jaws pretty much fell off (not literally) when they saw me do the same, only I was carrying the one I was over my head. ___________________________________________________________ Later, when everyone is getting dressed for the party, Rarity shows me what she’s picked out for me. it’s lovely pinkish-purple button-up dress, a yellow ribbon with green polka dots tied around my waist, one thigh-high sock with black and pink stripes, whilst the other is pink with purple stripes, a small pink boots on my left foot and black leather boot on the right. I find it odd she chose a look I like, but tells me that, having met me, she felt it was fitting. I finish off the outfit with a pendant shaped like my Cutie Mark. We all go to the dance, myself joining Diamond and Silver on the dance floor. I have to stop myself from facepalming when I see Scootaloo doing the chicken dance though. Wow, the pandering still happens, even when I’m experiencing it. When Twilight’s given the crown, I glance around, ready for when we’ll have to run. “Twilight! Help!” There it is. “They've got Spike!” Twilight cries, leaping off the stage and running after Snips and Snails, the rest of us right behind her. When we get outside, we’re stopped. “That's close enough!” Sunset says, holding a sledgehammer up, her posture clearly meaning she means to smash the portal with it. “Twilight!” Spike cries from in the two dolts’ grasp. Twilight growls. “Don't hurt him!” Sunset Shimmer smirks. “Oh, I wouldn't dream of it. I'm not a monster, Twilight.” She looks to Snips and Snails. “Let him go.” Spike leaps from their grasp and hurries over to Twilight, who takes him in her arms. “You don't belong here,” Sunset says in a mocking pitying voice. “Give me the crown, and you can go back to Equestria tonight. Or keep it and never go home.” I just fold my arms. “Wow. You really don’t think much of Twilight’s intellect, do you?” “Huh?” everyone asks, even Sunset and her lackeys. I keep my arms folded, but point a finger to indicate to Sunset. “Well, think about it. Twilight, Sunset, Spike and I all came through that portal.” “So?” Dash asks, looking confused. “She’s threatening to destroy the magical portal,” I say, nodding to Sunset, “with a hammer. By hitting the spot where the four of us came out from Equestria to this world, while the portal is still open. And she expects us to fear her destroying it by smashing the hammer in that exact spot.” I wait as time slowly ticks by, before Twilight, Spike and the girls go, “Oh!” Then Twilight frowns, looking to Sunset Shimmer. “Seriously? That was your big plan? I managed to do what you couldn’t, by turning into an Alicorn and you think I’m that stupid I’d fall for it? Wow. You do think little of everyone else.” Sunset growls, before blinking and smirks, moving to stand in front of the portal. “Well, I can still keep you from returning to Equestria until the portal closes, then you’ll be stuck here!” Okay. Really should’ve seen that one coming. “Tick tock, Twilight,” Sunset sneers. “We haven't got all night. The portal will be closing on its own in less than an hour. So, what's your answer?” I lean closer to Twilight. “I can just teleport her somewhere and we can make a run for the portal if you like?” Gotta give her the option. Twilight takes off her crown, looks from it to the other, then shakes her head lightly at me, before looking sternly at Sunset. “No.” Sunset’s eyes widen. “What!? Equestria! Your friends! Lost to you forever! Don't you want to go back?!” “Yes, but I've also seen what you've been able to do here without magic. And the portal will still open in another thirty moons. Equestria will find a way to survive without my Element of Harmony until I return.” No, it’d be up shit creak, but I won’t ruin her moment with that knowledge. “This place might not if I allow it to fall into your hands.” She stands up. “So go ahead. Stop me from going through. I’ll find a way back in thirty moons, because you are not getting this crown!” she finishes her speech by putting her crown back on her head. Okay, now for my own bit of fun, now that I’ve pointed out how dumb Sunset’s plan was. “Actually, Sunset,” I smirk, looking to the fuming girl, “since I’m a being of chaos, how about we make a deal?” “Huh?” everyone says, turning to me. I nod. “Let us through,” I snap my fingers, Twilight’s crown vanishing from her head and reappearing in my hand, where I twirl it around, “and I’ll give you the crown.” “WHAT?!” Twilight, Spike and the girls cry, their eyes wide with disbelief. Sunset blinks, then smirks. “Deal.” Another snap of my fingers and the crown is in Sunset’s hands, causing her to drop the hammer. “NO!” the girls and Spike cry. “At last!” Sunset grins, lifting the crown to her head. “More power than I could ever imagine!” she places it on her head... and nothing happens. “What?” she says, glancing up, only to see the Element of Magic is missing from the crown. I snicker, causing everyone to turn to me. I’m grinning like an idiot, twirling the Element of Magic on my finger like a basketball. “I told her she could have the crown. I never said anything about the Element of Magic embedded within it.” The girls and Spike all look to me, before they burst out laughing. “Wow,” Dash laughs, holding her sides. “For a moment there, I really thought you were just giving it to her.” I just smirk. “Yeah right. Like I’d ever do that. This belongs to the real one who deserves to be a princess. ” “Oh, yes, she's so very special!” Sunset snarls, before smirking. Suddenly, I’m tackled from behind and the Element of Magic flies from my hand as I thud to the ground, winded. And, of course, things play out as you’d expect. A big game of keep away, resulting in Sunset getting the Element and placing it in the crown. “Now, I have the power that’s rightfully mine!” she says, before placing it on her head. This leads to the creepy dark light show, finishing in Sunset being in her demon form. I smack my fist on the ground. “Come on. Really? It’s that fixed a thing?” Demon Sunset gives and evil laugh, before turning Snips and Snails into demons too. Well, this is just great. Sunset flies over to the school, causing any students who’d braved coming out to hurry back inside and close the door behind them. “I've had to jump through so many hoops tonight just to get my hands on this crown, and it really should have been mine all along,” Sunset growl, before smiling. “But let's let bygones be bygones. I am your princess now, and you will be loyal... to me!” Sunset goes inside and I know she’s turned all the students and faculty into her zombies. She comes back out through the hole she made to see us all standing in her way. She sneers. “Spoiler alert: I was bluffing when I said I was going to destroy the portal. I don't want to rule this pathetic little high school; I want Equestria! And with my own little teenage army behind me, I am going to get it!” “No, you're not!” Twilight declares. Sunset rolls her eyes. “Oh, please! What exactly do you think you're going to do to stop me? I have magic, and you have nothing!” Rainbow Dash and the others step forward. “She has us!” “And last I checked,” I say, floating up into the air, “I’ve still got my Chaos Magic, which trumps yours any day, Sunset.” She sneers. “Oh, really? Let’s put that to the test, shall we?” She quickly shoots a torrent of fire at me from her hands, which I block with barely even any effort, holding up a single hand. I yawn, holding my other hand to my mouth. “When am I supposed to be impressed?” “You-hoo!” I turn, only to just barely avoid a head-on with Snips, but in doing so, lose my focus. Too late I realize this was Sunset’s plan, as she quickly amps up the power of her attack before I can recover, the blast hitting me, sending me flying right back through the portal. ___________________________________________________________ “What do you think happened?” “Oh, I do hope Twilight and Spike are alright.” “Screwball, please, are you okay?” Ow. Man, that’s one painful headache. Feels like I smashed my head against solid crystal. Slowly opening my eyes, I look around to see the pony versions of the Mane 6 minus Twilight, Celestia, Luna and Cadance. I blink, before glancing down at myself and confirming that, yeah, I’m a pony again. Sitting up, I glance behind me and see a large dent in the crystal wall. Guess I really did smash my head against solid crystal. That explains the headache. “Screwball, what happened?” Cadance asks anxiously. “We’ve been waiting almost three days and, suddenly, you come flying out of the portal backwards and smash your head into the wall.” “Trust me, that wasn’t exactly the plan,” I says, rubbing my forehead, before my eyes widen. “Dammit! That was a cheap shot!” Before the others can question what I mean, I run back through the portal, leaping out the other end, reading to fight, only to see Twilight and the others Ponying Up for the first time. I frown, pouting. “No fair. She got me with a cheap shot.” I blink, however, glancing up to my head and behind me as my ears move to the top of my head, becoming pony ears and my hair grows out longer. I scratch my head as Sunset’s blasted with the power of the Elements. “Um, why am I Ponying Up? I mean, it makes no sense, so then it makes sense, since I’m me, that it would happen, but...” I shake it off and decide to just roll with it. I do have to change my clothes again though. You ever notice how, at the end of the first movie, Twilight goes through the portal wearing her dress, but then, in Rainbow Rocks, when she comes back out of the portal, she’s wearing her previous attire? Well, same thing for me, apparently. It seems the portal works only a weird, usual wear format only. I really am going to have stern words with Starswirl about that when I meet him. Twilight gives Sunset the friendship speech and we all go back to the dance, myself just having the time of my life, now that I don’t have to hide my magic. After the dance is over, we say our goodbyes to the girls and head for the portal. “That crown really does suit you, Princess Twilight,” Spike says as we walk. Twilight smiles at him. “You know what, Spike? I am starting to feel a little more comfortable wearing it.” “And the wings?” I've been walking on two legs and picking things up with these!” she holds up her hands. “Wings? I'm thrilled that's all I'll be dealing with back in Equestria!” As they pass through the portal, I snap my fingers. Time to make things right. ___________________________________________________________ Vice Principal Luna stood, watching Sunset Shimmer and Snips and Snails get ready to start work they would be helping with in repairing the damage to the school. She also glanced towards Princess Twilight Sparkle and the five of their students she’d become friends with, along with the girl, Screwball, who had accompanied the princess. “Vice Principal Luna?” Luna whirled around, to see Screwball standing behind her. She looked back and could still see Screwball with the other girls. She looked back to the one behind her, who gave a small smirk. “I’ve Chaos Magic, remember? Nothing makes sense with me. Now, come on. they’re someone you need to see.” Before Luna could ask what was going on, Screwball took her hand and the world went white for a moment. When the light faded, they were standing in a hospital patient room. Luna blinked and would have questioned the sudden change in location, but what she saw took her breath away and caused her to gasp, her hand flying to her mouth. Blessed Moon. Her dear Blessed Moon was in the bed and she looked better than when she’d disappeared. Luna turned to Screwball, unable to form any words. The girl with pony ears, which were currently splayed downward, looked away. “It was my own reckless actions that led to Blessed Moon being hurt. After the Luna in my world consoled me, she guessed what had happened when your Blessed Moon disappeared. So, right before walking through the portal, I went back in time, took Blessed Moon from her hospital bed and brought her to now, whilst also healing as much of her injuries as best I can without the hospital staff getting too suspicious.” She looked back up, giving a small smile. “Good luck, Luna. And don’t worry. She will never have to fear something like that happening again.” A groan from the bed distracted Luna and she turned to see Blessed Moon starting to wake. There was a snapping sound and, turning back, Luna barely caught a glimpse of Screwball as she disappeared with a pop. Luna shook her head and hurried over to her daughter, pulling her into a hug. She didn’t care if it didn’t make any sense. She had her daughter back, that was all that mattered. ___________________________________________________________ I reappear in front of the portal and pass through, a second before it closes. As the world returns to ponies, Princess Celestia steps forward. “Sunset Shimmer, is she alright?” Twilight and I look at each other and smile, before she answers. “I think she's gonna be fine. I left her in good hands.” Rainbow and Rarity glance at each other, before the cyan mare asks, “What are hands?” I turn and glare at the fading sequence that tries to appear and shout, “Hold it! I’m not done with that plot hole!” Everypony and dragon look at me with raised eyebrows. I point a hoof at Rainbow Dash. “You all live in a world with minotaurs. Fucking minotaurs, and you don’t know what hands are? Really? What do you think they call them, meaty grabbers?” They all glance at each other, then all eyes are looking at Dash and Rarity, who blush.