Over You

by Michael Hudson


Chapter 1

Rarity hummed to herself as she sat back down at her work station. She had admittedly been delighted to see Spike, but she also had work to do. Who else was going to make this dress? It was a little odd though, what with him having come so late at night. “I wonder if he’d been sleeping poorly. Maybe I should look into getting him some chamomile tea to help him.”

She couldn’t dwell too long on it though, not when a horrible clatter came from her front door. With a slight grumble, Rarity stood back up. She just wanted to work! But, on the other hoof, she couldn’t complain about being popular. Such a thing would be hypocritical. Besides, maybe it was Spike, who had decided he did indeed wish to help her with the dress.

Instead, when she opened the door, she was met by a crying princess. She stepped back upon seeing Twilight’s tear stained cheeks, before the alicorn put her hooves to the sides of her cheeks. “Spike! Have you seen Spike?”

Rarity swallowed hard, her ears lowering for a moment at the glass shattering screech that was Twilight’s voice, and put a hoof onto her shoulder, though it did not alleviate the squishing on her cheeks. “Yesh, I have. He just left in fact.”

Twilight lowered her hooves and began looking around frantically, her head on a free swivel as she stomped into the boutique. “Really? What did he say? Where was he going? What do you know!?”

Rarity frowned slightly, a worm of worry growing in her as she watched her friend. While not the most composed mare in Equestria, Twilight was normally better than… this. She swallowed hard and stepped closer to her friend. “He just came to congratulate me and Applejack. Past that, I don’t know. Twilight, what’s wrong?”

Twilight turned to Rarity, obviously using every bit of self control she had left not to turn into a sobbing wreck. She then held up a single piece of parchment, that simply said, Goodbye.

And at that moment, a puff of green flame came between them, and from within, a letter dropped down.

Both of them looked down at it, before Twilight stepped away from it. “No. No, I don’t want to hear what he has to say. I don’t want to be told no again.”

Rarity frowned again as she saw the other unicorn sit. With how devastating this was for Twilight, and how her natural curiosity got beat by this, she wasn’t sure she wanted to know either. However, one of them had to read it. Had to know.

Dear Rarity,

I know what I’m doing is wrong, and in fact, that’s why I’ve penned this. When I first left your house, I tried to be smug, tried to be happy with what I’d done. I would be like one of those great heroes I used to read about even, the type who packed up and left it all behind.

I was being an idiot, just like I have been since I came to Ponyville.

So, first things first, please let know Twilight that I’m sorry, and that this isn’t her fault. I’m not leaving because of her. I’m not even entirely sure if I’m leaving because of you. However, I’ve known I needed to leave for a long time. Be my own drake and what not. But I couldn’t, because I was still an idiot.

I was still the idiot who told me that the trips to the farm were normal. An idiot who said that how the one I liked left her gaze on other mares more than she ever did on me. And I was especially an idiot for the past week.

I did love you Rarity. During my whole time as an idiot, that was all I knew. The beautiful, classy mare had stolen my heart, and even if she didn’t act interested, would ever be interested, I could make her by just working hard enough. I guess that’s why Applejack hurt so much, because I never saw her trying to win you.

But those aren’t excuses. I should have cheered with the rest of the crowd when Applejack proposed to you. I should have been able to sweep you both into my arms, and tell you how proud I was, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t remember all that I’d done.

So I hid. I tried to focus on the kisses, the close hugs, even the gifts. Let them be proof of how you felt for me, not the times you’d chuckled my advances away, or what you’d just done. Not after so many years, even after watching you act the same to anypony who helped you.

And that’s why I left. It was that last thing that made me realize how much of an idiot I was. I was seeing love in actions that I knew was you being friendly. I would take anything for that to be the case, and it just wasn’t.

It just wasn’t.

It still hurts to write, but at least I can now. And I want it to stop hurting. I want to be able to look at you, and mean with all of my heart, that I am happy for you. But if I’m going to do that, I need to ask you, Twilight, Applejack, everypony, the impossible.

Leave me alone. Do not try to find me, do not try to drag me back, but leave me entirely alone. If you do, I know I’ll come home. I want to be home. But I can’t be home, because I’ll think that you sent for me, or that somepony thinks we belong together, and that isn’t right. I need to learn, and I need to get better.

So please, let me leave, and tell them I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt any of you, and I wish I didn’t have to vent in this one last letter.

Love,
Spike

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I have never been more proud of you, and if you come back, I will never forgive you. Now, go do what I never let you, and I’m sorry. I never deserved a drake like you, and I only want to see you when you figure out who does.

Sincerely,
Rarity

.

Spike smiled ever so slightly as he folded the piece of parchment, and slipped it into his jacket. He then stood up tall, stretched out his wings, and as bits of salt slipped into his maw, he took off ready to see what the world held for a young drake as he set out to find who he truly was.