“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?!?!?!?!?” The Doctor bellowed. “WHY ARE YOU CRASHING?! YOU KNOW I START HAVING PANIC ATTACKS WHEN YOU START CRASHING WITHOUT ME TOUCHING ANYTHING!!”
The TARDIS was falling through the time and space faster than the Doctor could handle. He was running around trying to calm the careening time machine, hyperventilating all the while. With a deafening BOOM, the Doctor was thrown into a wall, and he lost consciousness immediately.
{----}
When finally came ‘round, he was met with a shock. He was startled by his appendages, or rather, the lack of them. At this point he had been stressed to the maximum, so he was remarkably calm for his newest predicament. He stood up, only to fall flat on his face. Then he realized that he wasn’t human anymore, at least not in appearance.
“I get the feeling that getting on my feet, no wait a minute.” He was appalled to see that he no longer had feet, but hooves. “Why hooves,” he moaned. “I can’t pick anything up with hooves! I need fingers! I’m rubbish without fingers! Well I didn't regenerate so that's a plus.”
He decided to observe his surrounding, but to his surprise, he couldn’t. The only working light in the room had finally given out, plunging the Doctor into darkness. “I wish I had a light or something,” he muttered, only to have a greenish light surround him. Confused, he spun around, trying to find the source of the light, and after spinning himself dizzy, he realized it was coming from above. He looked up, to find that a cone-shaped object protruding from his forehead was the source.
“Where did that come from,” he wondered aloud. Then he realized that he was losing energy at an alarming rate. He wished of the light, only to have it stay on.
“Turn off, you blasted light! I'd like to be able to have enough energy to find out what happened.” The room was plunged back into darkness. He felt his around, only to find out the hard way, he ended up in the Swimming Pool Room. Having memorized the Tardis’s current layout, he wandered blindly to the console room, while tripping over fallen debris. When he got the console room, the central column was aglow with a red light. He ran over, tripped, and face-planted into the monitor. He unstuck his face from the monitor and tried to find the light switch. After several minutes, and multiple double-backs, he finally found and flipped the switch. The moment he did, he regretted his decision.
{----}
The console room was in ruins. The central column was cracked, the half the console totaled, and most of the supports were in pieces, scattered around the room. He had known that there was damage, but this was way beyond his expectations. Light began to shine through the door’s windows as the sun rose outside. ‘I might as well go see what planet, or even dimension I’ve crashed into,’ he thought.
The sun was blinding as he stepped through the door. Suddenly a voice out of the blue scared him half to death.
“Hi, I’m Pinkie Pie! What’s your name?”
As he turned around he saw a pink pony with an even pinker, wildly curly mane and tail standing before him. But the thing that stood out wasn’t the talking, or even all the pink, but rather the three balloons on her flank. Concerned, he looked at his own rump, only to find an hourglass over a gear plastered on his side. Then it all came tumbling out at once.
“What’s that, where am I, who are you, what does this tattoo mean, why do I have it, how are you talking, and what do I look like?”
The pink mare wasn’t fazed in the slightest, and she answered every question with a speed that rivaled the Doctor’s own. “That’s a
Cutie Mark, Equestria, Pinkamena Diane Pie but you can call me Pinkie, it explains your special talent, which is probably time-related, because everyone has one, I’ve always been able to talk, and you are gray with a black mane and tail.”
“Ok,” he began, cautiously. “My name is…” He thought for a moment. ‘The pink mare, Pinkie, I think she said, said something about how the mark on my butt was time-related. Hmm… I’ve got it!’
“My name is Chronometer,” the Doctor said. “Now, please explain each individual answer to me, slowly. I’m… not from around here.”
“Let me guess,” Pinkie said. “You’re an alien with two hearts and that box you walked out of is actually a bigger-on-the-inside time machine/spaceship that crashed through the dimensions, bringing you here, all because your ship was damaged by your greatest enemy of all time.” She concluded this with a tone of certainty and the biggest smile the Doctor had ever seen.
“How did you know all that?” Asked the Doctor, stunned.
“Just a hunch,” she replied. “Anyway, the mark on your flank is called a Cutie Mark. It symbolizes your special talent the one thing that makes you special, and since yours is an hourglass on a gear I figured your special talent was either time or things with gears, like clocks.”
“Time,” the Doctor said. “Definitely time.”
"Anywho, you are in Equestria, a country full of ponies. The whole world has ponies, subgroups include Earth Ponies, Unicorns, Pegasi, Crystal Ponies, and the five Alicorn princesses. There are multiple countries and other variations of the sort all over the planet: Equestria, the Crystal Empire, Yakyakistan, Saddle Arabia, Maretonia, Griffonstone, the Arimaspi territory, the Bugbear territory, and the Dragonlands. You are currently in Equestria, in the town of Ponyville. There’s also Canterlot, the capital, Manehatten, Trottingham, Seaddle, Los Pegasus, Cloudsdale, Fillydelphia, Baltimare, Tall Tale, Applelossa, Vanhoover, Dodge City, and my friend Starlight’s old village.”
“Blimey, that’s a lot of puns,” noted the Doctor.
“Yep,” Said Pinkie.
“So… since there must be a reason I’m here, are they any big events coming up, or anything strange going on?” Pinkie stood there for a minute, thinking.
“Well, I’m going to Manehatten with Rarity to see my sister, Maud in a couple of weeks, but other than that no big events going on, but I have noticed something strange going on in Ponyville. Whenever there is a giant crowd, there always seems to be more than one of each pony. When I mentioned this to Twilight, after finding her in the castle library, she started panicking and ranting about…”
“Pinkie.”
“...changelings. I didn’t think it was changelings because everypony has been acting normal, and nice and nopony looked hypnotized. Twilight wouldn’t calm down even after I pointed this out to her, so I suggested a Changeling-Detection spell. As soon as I said this, she began pulling books off the library shelves left and right. Then she cast the spell and it was really, really, really bright…”
“Pinkie.”
“...and then she looked all happy but confused because there were no Changelings apparently…”
“PINKAMENA DIANE PIE!!!!!!”
“And then I said, “Oatmeal? Are you crazy?” Wha… yes?”
The Doctor stood there for a moment, looking extremely confused before he shook himself out of it.
“Show me what you mean by ‘More than one of each pony.’”
{----}
As the perpetually bouncing pink partytastic party horse pulled out her perfectly pleasant looking purple megaphone, the Doctor decided looks can be deceiving and wisely decided to cover his ears in suspicion. Pinkie raised the megaphone to her mouth and shouted at the top of her lungs,
“EVERYPONY IN TOWN CENTER, STAT!!!! THIS IS NOT A DRILL, I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!! WE HAVE DANGEROUSLY, AND POSSIBLY FATALLY LOW PARTY ATTENDANCE!!!!!”
Much to the Doctor’s surprise, this tactic worked surprising well, but she wasn’t done weaving her web just yet.
“NOW YOU MAYBE ASKING YOURSELF, “What holiday is it today?” WELL, TODAY IS NATIONAL CELEBRATE A RANDOM HOLIDAY HOLIDAY!!!”
At this point, the perpetually puzzling pink party pony was beginning to grow on him, but he also began to question her mental stability. He noticed about 6 other ponies that stood out probably because they run up on stage with a small dragon. He noticed that there was a blue pegasus with a rainbow mane, another pegasus that was yellow with a pink mane, a white unicorn with a blue-purple mane, a pale pink unicorn, (it then occurred to him that was a unicorn, hence the green light earlier), and then, much to his surprise, a purple unicorn with wings.
“Pinkie! What’s wrong,” asked the rainbow pegasus.
“Nothing,” Pinkie replied. “I just needed everypony in one place for him to see.” She gestured at the Doctor. “Oh! You don’t know who this is! Everypony, this is the Doctor. Doctor, this is Princess Twilight Sparkle, Element of Magic, Applejack, Element of Honesty, Rainbow Dash, Element of Loyalty, Fluttershy, Element of Kindness, Rarity, Element of Generosity, and Starlight Glimmer.” She pointed at them one by one going from purple to orange, to rainbow, to yellow, to white and ending on the light pink one.
The Doctor pointed at, Starlight was it? “Does she have an element? Is it like, Justice or something?”
Twilight spoke up, “No, she doesn’t have an Element of Harmony. There are only six, Loyalty, Laughter (which is Pinkie), Generosity, Honesty, Kindness, and Magic.”
The Doctor was extremely confused but decided to ignore it for later. “Pinkie briefed me on the way over. There are clones running around Ponyville but it isn’t Changelings, correct?”
“That is correct,” confirmed Twilight.
“Ok then, I have a theory that I’m praying is wrong. But to prove my theory, I’m going to need one of the clones, and the most powerful pony here.”
Twilight and Starlight looked at each other. “Doctor,” Starlight said, “Twilight and I have almost equal magical talent. We both got our Cutie Marks in it. But I suppose Twilight is a bit more powerful than me.”
“Starlight! Don’t belittle yourself! There is no way I could have traveled through time like you did,” said Twilight.
“Then you can both come with…” the Doctor paused. “Did you say ‘travel through time?”
“Yes,” said Twilight, earning a glare from Starlight. “Why do you ask?”
“Dang it! Now the big reveal will be nothing! My special talent isn't special! If anyone can do it magically, then why bother with a box,” moaned the Doctor. “Come on.” The Doctor trudged back to the TARDIS with Starlight and Twilight following him, very confused all the while.
{----}
As he pushed the door open, he walked in leaving Starlight and Twilight’s jaws to hit the floor upon entering. Literally.
“How are you doing that?” asked the Doctor. He began working with the console, pressing buttons and pulling levers left and right, causing the door to close, the room began lighting up, the central column began to glow with the most vibrant colors they had ever seen, and a sound that the pair of bewildered fillies would later describe as sounding like a key being rubbed across piano strings. In the Doctor’s mope, he didn’t even notice that the interior had done itself up to match his equine form, until Twilight said,
“It’s bigger on the inside.”
“Yes, yes it…” he paused, looking around. “...is.” The Console Room was bigger than before, with each panel of the console itself larger to compensate for the hooves. The room itself was a silver dome with white columns along the walls, up along the open hallway that stretched around the top of the room. Above each door was a row of 4 lights. Along the open hallway, in between each column was mossy cobblestone, and above each door was a sign labeling what room it was. There was a bathroom, a library, a pool, a bar, a bedroom, and then an elevator leading up. The central column was filled with a rainbow liquid behaving similarly to a lava lamp, it’s glow fading in and out as they flew.
“I am liking this,” commented the Doctor. “Since I know what you are wondering, I shall answer all of your questions before you ask them. This is the TARDIS, it’s a time machine/spaceship, no it’s not magic, it’s alien, I’m an alien from another dimension, we are going to Town Hall where Pinkie has gathered everyone, and if you’re wondering about the library, yes, you can go look.” Both fillies took off like lightning at this statement. As soon as Starlight passed over the threshold to the library, one of the lights lit up with the color of Starlight’s coat. “Don’t get too comfortable! We’re almost there,” he called, then to himself he added, “I hope I haven’t left Pinkie in the hands, err… hooves, of what I think I left her with. If my suspicions are correct, then Equestria is in some serious trouble. Very serious trouble.”