This is Scootaloo here to tell you a few things about this story. I'm going to warn you, and I'm only going to warn you once: this will be very, very confusing, and it will leave you feeling like a banana. And I know alotta ponies will not like this, but I don't care, I just wrote this to pass the time while Rarity was adding the finishing touches to the dresses me and Sweetie Belle were gonna model. I know it may sound like Discord was the cause of this, but he's not, surprisingly. And if you're not one of those pretty random people who think the meaning of life is waffles, I advise you not to look at this.
Read at your own risk.
Once upon a time, the cows jumped over the sun. Apple Bloom, one of the cows, started to eat the cheese growing on the rainy spots of the sun. Her friend, Sweetie Belle neighed as she began to chomp down on the chocolate cake next to the cheese. Both cows had the heads of a pony and a body of a cow. Just then, both cows heard squawking. They both turned to see their other friend, Scootachicken, approach them.
Scootachicken was a chicken with Scootachicken head. Scootachicken started to nibble on the banana seeds laid on the sun. Just then, a white, regal alicorn with a flowing, multi-colored mane calmly approached them. She looked upon them, giving the ponifyied animals a bemused look.
Magically, a banana suit appeared on the regal pony. Her eyes shrunk and she wore a huge smile on her face. "I'M A BANANA! I'M A BANANA!" The pony chanted over and over. She started to sing it lie a song and matched it with a very familiar dance routine.
"Celestia!" A loud voice boomed. Another alicorn approached the banana-suited pony known as Celestia. She had a dark shade of blue with a flowing, sparkly mane similar to the other alicorn."What are you doing?!"
"Being banana," Celestia replied casually.
"You can't be a banana," Luna began, "without me being a chicken!" Suddenly, a Scootaloo suit appeared on Luna. The two alicorns together hopped around eachother, howling weird sounds.
In Equestria, a purple alicorn was seeing through a telescope. She seemed to take note of everything happening on the sun.
"What's going on, Twilight?" A pink pony with a darker shade of bouncy, curly pink hair asked.
"Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom are cows with pony heads, Scootaloo is a chicken with a pony head, and Celestia and Luna are dancing and singing in a banana and Scootalo suit," the pony assumed as Twilight replied. "What do you think that means, Pinkie?"
"This could only mean one thing..." The pink earth pony said in a low, serious tone. "ICE CREAM!!!" Suddenly Pinkie was in a cupcake suit randomly dancing. In the background was flashing ice creams of all colors. The words, "ICE CREAM PARTY" was largely written in bubble letters on top of Pinkie's head.
Suddenly, a blast of bananas broke through the walls. More bananas started to fill up the room. "PRAISE YOUR NEW, ALMIGHTY RULER, BANANA GODDESS!" A loud voice boomed. The voice somewhat felt familiar to Twilight but she couldn't put her hoof on it.
Celestia appeared from one of the holes, still wearing her banana suit. By her side was Luna, still wearing the Scootaloo suit. Out from behind, Twilight and Pinkie could spot giant banana canons that were still shooting bananas. The room air was filled with the yellow-colored fruit.
"AND BOW DOWN TO ME, THE ALMIGHTY CHICKEN GODDESS!" Luna shouted.
"I thought you were the Potato Godess," Celestia said.
"I am so over potatoes," Luna replied.
"We will never give in to bananas! NEVERRRR!" Pinkie clamored.
"So be it," Celestia whispered. "BRING FORTH THE BANANAS!" On cue, thousands and thousands of bananas filled ever hole and space left. Twilight blasted all the bananas to ashes with her blinding purple magic.
"Give it up, Celestia," Twilight said.
"Also, it's Banestia now," Celestia corrected.
"You will never get your way, Banestia. There is more randomness than bananas, we will always win, no matter what!" Twilight said.
"Look at me, I'm a bouncy ball!" Pinkie said. Now she app[eared to be a round, pink ball bouncing away from view.
"Lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol!" Luna said, squishing her cheeks with her hooves as she watched Pinkie bounce away. "HWESHFYQGQTBIUHCWQUGYEVFGYBFWGF!!!"
Celestia and Twilight stuck their tongues out and started to blow air through their teeth, causing a very annoying sound to come out. And Luna continued to say senseless things. She started to glitch, her body becoming pixelated. Then it was raining bananas. There were bananas, chickens, bananas, chickens, and so on.
The sounds started to dim. The bananas and chickens started to float away into the unknown. Then Twilight, Celestia, and Luna slowly started to fall into a dark abyss.
Everything started to fade away and grow quieter. Now there was nothing. Everything was pitch black. It was all dark.
There was absolutely nothing.
"Haha, LOL, just kidding!" Twilight said. It was raining bananas, Fluttershy was a tree. Twilight walked around in her new pancake boots. "Fifty cookies will eat you. You should always bathe in mud before you go to the store to buy more cookies. Remember to pray to the waffle god as a gift. If you do not feed the apple, you must eat pizza with milk. To be a fighter, you should first eat five whole cakes. You must find the weakness of your opponent by watching the grass fly. Blah, blah, blah..."
"Apple apple apple, apple apple apple..." A blonde-maned earth pony in a red apple suit was walking down the cotton candy floor. "Apple, apple. Apple?"
"No apple!" Twilight said, stomping her hoof angrily. "You should slice the oranges and then hang them on the walls! I told yu that before you baked a cloud in the oven!"
"Apple?" The apple pony asked.
"Listen to me, Applejack, I told you to do things exactly the way I want! How can I let you off when you can't even draw grass on a shower curtain?!"
"Apple?" Applejack wore a look that resembled a confused bird.
"Here, have some apple seeds. After that, you can wash down the fences using waffles," Twilight levitated a few apple seeds and tossed them in front of Applejack.
Rainbow Dash walked into the scene, wearing a duck suit with goggles on her eyes and flippers on her hooves. "Quack!" Rainbow said, making her way towards Twilight. "Quack, quack!"
"Fire the cupcake cannons!" Twilight demanded. Thousands of mini, adorable Twilight's fired mini cupcakes from their little, tiny cannons at Rainbow. However, the cupcakes had no effect on the pony in a duck suit. She quacked while nibbling at the cupcakes like they were bread crumbs.
"BANANAS RUUULE!" Celestia, or should I say Banestia, still in her banana suit, fired bananas from her banana bazooka.
"Take cover!" Twilight yelled as she got blasted with bananas in her face. There was mush all over her, completely coating her face in a light yellow substance with banana peels sticking out. When Twilight and her mini minions had enough bananas all over them, they turned into pancakes.
"I SHALL NEVER BOW DOWN TO YOU, SISTER!" Luna bellowed. She was sitting on a throne made of live, flying chickens. "FIRE THE CHICKENS!" A flock of chickens attacked Banestia and her banana army.
Luna charged at Celestia, letting out a battle cry. Celestia did the same. Luna plunged her magical chicken staff into Celestia's suit, and Celestia fired bananas from her bazooka into Luna's suit. The two sides used so much force that there was a blinding light that followed their hit.
And then the world exploded. Da end.
"... And then the word exploded, da end." A human with multi -colored hair wearing a business suit was typing on her computer. The first bell rang in Canterlot High, which meant that Celestia had to get started on her paperwork.
"Are you writing fanfiction again?" A voice asked. A blue human with a dark shade of blue and a light shade of purple hair walked in. She approached Celestia's desk.
"I've decided that if I wanted to boost up my status on EMFiction, I should write a comedy story. I know that this story will get so many likes that it'll get me more followers," Celestia replied.
Luna sighed. "Are you still on that fansite? You know this pony stuff is for little kids. Even if Twilight really was a magical pony from Equestria, many view her as a role model for the children of this generation. You're too old for friendship lessons. Wouldn't it be weird if a grown woman engaged in a fandom for little girls?"
"So what? There are many people around the world who are my age or older who love the fandom. They even made a TV series out of it that's sparked up so many new fans! And besides, most of the content here is for grown adults. We may like a children's show, but we can be very serious." Celestia pointed out.
Luna wore a bemused look. "Says the person who's username is ScootaChicken7383. Honestly, I wonder why you partake in these childish activities. It's very immature to do such things."
Luna walked out of the room. Sher checked her phone and saw over a million likes on her new picture she posted online. It was Celestia dancing in a banana suit. Many of the comments posted were making fun of her, and the picture had gotten so many hits that it went viral. Luna smirked and let out an evil chuckle. "That'll teach you for making fun me being a Baby Bunny Lessons fan!"