//------------------------------// // Bonding Hearts Pt.2 // Story: Song of Whispers // by Wintergreen Diaries //------------------------------// Chapter 20: Bonding Hearts Pt.2 Even without years of bartending experience, Silver had a knack for spotting troubled ponies. While the night was busy and most all of his friends were having a merry time celebrating the return of Cerulean’s brother to the land of consciousness, his cousin and her coltfriend were uncharacteristically somber, even Berry consuming her drinks much slower than normal and Snowdrift going over his one drink limit, sipping through a second while speaking only when spoken to. An impatient pony yanked his attention back to the counter, but as he turned he found not an irate scowl on an unfamiliar muzzle, but a grinning pegasus with equally cheery mare counterpart. “Gale, Cloudburn, always a pleasure. What can I get for you both?” “Thank ye fer the hospitality, Silver, but we’re not here for ourselves, if ye catch my drift,” he replied, motioning down the way to Snowdrift who simply raised his glass and took another drink. “Fate’s been right cruel to that lad, Silver. Ye got anything that could put a spring back in ‘is step?” A solution came instantly to mind, and Gale waited patiently as Silver disappeared into the back, returning with four glasses levitating beside him, setting two down in front of his guests and watching their reaction. “Whoa, that’s really... pretty,” Cloudburn murmured, watching the faint rainbow aura that seemed to be emanating from the cup. “Smells good too. Why haven’t we heard of this?” “It’s... kind of a secret. Truth is, it’s the best drink I’ve ever made, and it’s frightfully powerful, not from the alcohol content but the magic it contains. It’s also in short supply, as it’s made from Zap Apples which only come once a year. I’m down pretty low on my reserves, so I’ve been saving it for special occasions. Go ahead, try a sip.” Both pegasi indulged, and stared first at their cups and then at Silver, disbelief written on their faces in big, bold letters. “I can see why you don’t let other ponies know about this. This is... something else,” Cloudburn remarked, staring at the shimmering, clear fluid. “Aye, makes the rest o’ yer lineup taste like slumgullion by comparison - no offense, o’ course. It’s a fine drink, Silver. Ye should be proud.” Silver nodded his thanks before leaving the two and making his way over to Berry and Silver, snatching away their drinks amidst minor protest from Berry before she saw what was slid in front of her, whereupon she instantly shook her funk before draining half the glass. “Easy, Berry. I don’t have a lot of this stuff left, so you really should take the time to enjoy it.” Adopting an appropriate sipping pace, she glanced across at Snowdrift who despite his emotional state couldn’t resist the taste, tilting the glass back and taking a sizable drink before resting his head on a hoof. Something is going on, it’s clearly serious, but I don’t quite know how to approach it without knowing the subject... Hmmm... If there was one thing he had learned, both from his own mistakes and the trials he and Applejack had to work through, it was that honesty, while sometimes difficult and painful, was always the best policy, and thus he dove right in. “I know... it’s likely none of my business, and if you tell me not to pry, I won’t. Snowdrift, something’s wrong, and it’s hurting the both of you, isn’t it.” “Silver, you could use a little more tact than that,” Berry whispered, placing a hoof on Snowdrift’s shoulder as he tensed. “Berry, can I... talk to your cousin alone?” Silver waved Applejack over to the bar, quietly asking her to take care of things for a while before pouring himself a glass of cider and taking a seat next to Snowdrift, now vacant from Berry’s departure. I hate sounding the pessimist, but why am I even bothering... Talking it out isn’t going to make it any less painful, and Silver is no doctor. There’s no point, so why... He glanced across the room where Berry now sat alone, pointedly avoiding looking in his direction. That’s why... “Silver... have you ever... wanted to give somepony everything, but been unable to?” “You haven’t heard that story?” Well, I guess that makes sense, in a way. Berry isn’t really the type to blab about things like that. “Snow, I know exactly how that feels.” Snowdrift listened quietly as Silver recounted the evening that nearly ended his relationship with Applejack, and while Snowdrift could definitely sympathize, it was fundamentally different. “At least... you only had to wage that war for a little while...” The magic of the moonshine only served to further clarify the longing that had been present in Snowdrift from early on in the relationship, and rather than cheer the stallion up, it only made the anguish worse. “I don’t know how much you know about me, or my accident, but my wings... aren’t much good for anything anymore. Even despite this, Berry has... time and time again given me more than I could ever hope for. But she won’t... let me give back, not the way I know we both want...” “You mean...” Silver started, stopping as the stallion nodded, doing his best to fight back the tears. “At first, it would just... throb a little when my wings spread, but as affection grew, so did the pain... Even stopping everything for a week didn’t seem to help, the moment we came back together again it picked up right where it left off. I could... bear the pain, if she’d only let me...” Taking a deep breath, he downed what remained of the moonshine and set the glass back down softly. “If you asked her, she’d say we’ve made an ‘agreement’ not to escalate things, and I haven’t but... damn it, Berry... I just want this for you...” Silver didn’t need his living lie detector to know that every word Snowdrift spoke was the truth. And he also knew that Berry continuing to hold out on the both of them was going to have longer reaching effects, and far more painful ones at that. Despite her outward appearance as a slacking drunk, inside lay a kind and fragile heart, one that wouldn’t willingly let somepony be hurt on her account, but this... “Snowdrift, I will be proud to call you family someday. Admittedly, this may sound really strange, coming from her cousin, but I want you to try tonight.” Snowdrift looked up from his empty glass, following it as it levitated beside Silver who had stood. “On the night after Applejack and I first drank this moonshine, I really thought that I had lost everything... But she didn’t let me give up. Now, it’s your turn to do the same. Don’t let her push you away, Snow. Oh, but don’t take it by force, either,” he quickly added, silently cheering as a faint hint of a smile came to the muzzle of one he knew would never dream of such a thing. “I would, regrettably, have to kill you for that.” As the notes of the final song drew the musical to a close, Fluttershy closed her eyes and pressed a little closer to the stallion that had unknowingly given her one of her most cherished memories. While unable to vocalize his responses, it was quite clear that the experience had been for Whisper what bathing in a vat of bakery sweets would be for Pinkie Pie. Her eyes cracked open just a little, glancing on either side as she saw his scilliant green mane cascading down around her shoulders and chest. She slowly brought her hooves up, stroking the sliky fibers and humming softly as feelings of safety and peace replaced vulnerability and any trace of self-consciousness. “You were meant... for me...” Surrounded by warmth, Fluttershy felt little need to withhold herself from giving Whisper a private performance, singing softly as she let the purest of passions blaze. Tonight has been so special... Whisper, I would do anything for you. I know that you’re a little scared, and confused, but it doesn’t matter, because I love you. She paused as the full weight of her unspoken words came upon her. Whisper cracked open his eyes, but the singing soon started and they slowly shut once more as he held her close and playfully nuzzled her ear. I know it’s early... but this night was just like a fairytale. I know it won’t always be this easy, and I may even get hurt. I don’t even know if Whisper feels quite like I do, but... I really believe... She paused again, turning her head slightly so she could see his face. “You... were meant... for me...” I was meant... for Fluttershy? That thought, those simple words would have been enough, but as he brought a hoof to her muzzle and laid it gently on her cheek, he could hear with perfect clarity the depth of her adoration. I feel... exactly the same. And someday, when I’m all better, I’ll tell you. I’ll find a way to sing, and laugh, and tell you... what it is I feel. “Fluttershy, thank you.” Green letters repeated the message over and over, the stallion unable to think of any better way with which to show the depth of his gratitude, and Fluttershy accepted it as such. As the last of the magic faded from view, they took a few moments of silence, focused entirely on the other before questions that had been raised in the stallion’s mind but never conveyed bid him seek to expand his learning. “Fluttershy, at the end of the... what is it called again?” “The movie?” she offered, her soft voice nearly a mumble as she let herself relax. “Right, so, at the end when they stuck their muzzles together... that’s called ‘kissing,’ right? How come they did it differently? Aren’t they supposed to kiss the nose?” “Oh, Whisper... there are a lot of different things you can kiss...” Like noses, and ears, and mouths, and horns, and... oh dear! I really shouldn’t be thinking about those things... should I? I mean, this is kind of like a first date. She took a moment to chance a glance at Whisper, who was, expectedly, fixated on her. He held her gaze, making her the curious one as she noticed a slight blush against the green of his muzzle. I... um... I think I’d be ok, if... just a little one, maybe? But it has to be the right time. I want it to be special. Nodding and again letting her head sink into his soft chest, she reaffirmed within herself to wait for the most opportune moment to present itself, though she did allow her mind just a little bit of freedom, imagining what it would be like. My very first kiss with Whisper... I can hardly wait! For some ponies, the quiet solitude of the night is a blanket of peace to cover the worries of the day. A time of solace, wherein sleep’s gentle embrace washes away the mire of anxiety. But for Bangles, who had known only solitude for much of her life and more often than not was held captive to insomnia, it was simply more time alone in her mind. However, there was one sound that kept her from total silence, one pony that staved off the feeling of utter abandonment, and she was grateful for even that, though he lay unconscious and snoring on her floor. The moonlight cast over the clock revealed that it was nearly two in the morning, and sleep had yet to take her. A simple, fleeting thought crossed her mind, eliciting the faintest of smiles. Certainly, it couldn’t be real; after all, how could Freefall hold her if he couldn’t even speak to her? She knew that, despite her right as the one cheated upon, she could justify being angry, but it made too much sense for that. Even if... he never remains faithful, and sleeps with other mares, or even stallions... As long as he comes back, as long as I have just one pony who will, successfully or not, talk to me every now and again, I can accept it. I have... no right to anything else. She paused as she reviewed her internal declaration, but she couldn’t say whether or not she believed every word. After several more moments of introspection, she realized that it wasn’t. Regardless of how much she told herself that she had no right to happiness, she wanted... to experience what she saw in the other couples around town. If I admit... that it’s selfish, that I don’t deserve it, but chase it anyways, is that... does that make me like her? “Nnnnno...” It was nothing more than a random occurrence, a noise born of a drunken stupor, but to Bangles, it was her answer. Levitating the stallion gently into bed, she stared at him for a time, unmoving, before making her choice. “Freefall... I want... to hold you, if that’s... ok.” It was the first time she had touched a stallion since Cerulean, and it caused a terrible rift in her desires as the memories came flooding back. She hadn’t even pulled him close, only having set her hoof on his shoulder, before she withdrew her hoof. I’ve caused... so much pain. I’m just going to do the same if I try to take anything for myself. Freefall, I can’t... So please... take me, because I can’t reach out. She lay staring at the stallion, longing for him to wake and hold her close, but time moved on, and eventually a restless sleep came to take her. Ruby muttered some incomprehensible gibberish that was likely some kind of evening salutation, dragging her tired self to bed as the sugar crash hit. The mood had stayed somber, and they both crawled into bed without a word. Try as he may, Snowdrift couldn’t yank his thoughts away from Berry. It wasn’t entirely because of the moonshine, either. He hated his own limitations, and he knew she hated the fact that he struggled so much with it. And so, disregarding the potential dangers, he rolled over and pulled her into a deep kiss, the kind that they only shared once in a great while. She accepted it for a time, longing to let it continue. As she cracked open her eyes and saw his wings begin to unfurl, she tried to pull away but he held her steady. After what was their longest kiss ever, he pulled away and peered down at her. “Snow, please... I don’t want to see you hurt...” she said softly, placing a hoof on his cheek and wondering just how much pain he must be in already. His wings were almost full spread, a position she had only seen once, and he ended up nearly incapacitated from the lancing pains that raced along the bones and joints in his feathery appendages. I know you want to please me, Snow. And I want to please you too, but just having you with me is enough... Berry, you deserve far more than I give you. So... “Please...” he whispered, voice cracking as he was choked with emotion. “I want... to try.” Berry, I would never force anything on you, not ever. But, please... just let me try. I don’t... want to hold you at hoof’s length, I want to be one. I want to be yours. So please, just say the word... What should I do? He’s doing a great job at not showing it, but he has to be hurting. I know that he’s... wanted to do this for both of us for months, but I... I’ve stopped him every time. “Snowdrift, I...” Please... Please... “Please...” I can’t... say no, not this time. Please, let this be all right... “Come here...” she whispered, fighting back the tears as she pulled him close, reconnecting their muzzles and wrapping her arms around him, just below the wings. For a time, they simply kissed, for even that was cause for jubilation. But for Snow, who had wanted to give her so much more, it wasn’t enough. Having moved past the stage of total stiffness, he brought his wings down around her, enfolding her with them as he brought his hooves gently down to her flanks. The burning in her chest flared brighter as he traced her curves, his breathing becoming increasingly more difficult to regulate as he reveled in her excitement, as she did in his. “Can... can you... touch my wings?” “Are... you sure?” Even in the dim lighting, she could see his heartwarming smile as he watched his mare, the passion burning within exceeded only by his love for her. She closed her eyes as he leaned in once more, unsteadily raising a hoof to his wings and stroking them gently. The sudden, sharp intake of breath only fueled her own desires, and she pulled him back and continued, pressing just a little harder and add her own soft, verbal reminders to his own so that he would know, beyond a doubt, that he was able to please. He was gentle but passionate, and as he drew a trail of kisses down her neck, she yielded to her desire for him completely. “Snowdrift...” “What is it, Berry?” “I’m... I’m ready, if...” He gently placed his hoof over her mouth, holding it there for just a moment before repositioning it to her cheek. He found his hoof held in place by her own as they both silently thanked the other. A simple nod, and the intensity of her passion rose further as she realized that her request was to be fulfilled. She closed her eyes as he lowered himself down, savoring the heat of his body as they accepted each other’s gift, given in love. A romantic viewing of her favorite musical, plain popcorn, and a warm stallion who saw no problem with letting her cuddle to her heart’s content: everything Fluttershy had hoped for and more. This, however, came to an awkward end as Whisper realized the film had introduced countless questions regarding life, technology, and what the ponies were doing behind the couch during the laughter song. Sure, one of them had clearly been fake, but that still did little to ease his curiosity, and so he started with the one that struck him as the most strange. “What was that one pony doing behind the couch with the fake pony?” It was a simple, honest question completely devoid of innuendo or double entendre, but it was not received thus. Fluttershy’s mind was given an inch when she chose to indulge her thoughts of how a first kiss might occur, but contemplation had turned an inch to a mile, and thus she knew exactly what was inferred by the scene, as it had already attempted to penetrate her defenses multiple times. It wasn’t that Fluttershy was regularly a mare of perverse thoughts, but she couldn’t deny a growing desire for physical intimacy, despite the fact that the mere thought of actually sharing a real kiss made her want to sing, fly away, laugh, and hide, all at the same time. Still, he was still expectantly awaiting an answer, and Fluttershy scrambled to find an acceptable response. I can’t explain that to him! That’s really, well, embarrassing! I’d rather sing “Deeper” in the tavern again than explain... um... “that” to him. Goodness, I can’t even think about the word, and he’s still waiting for me to say something. I don’t want to lie, though... Oh, that’s it! “Oh, t-that?” she stammered, voice faltering. “They were just, well... they were... wrestling.” “Can we wrestle? Please? It looked like it might be fun! We can stay in bed, if you’d like. I know it’s not the same as the floor, but then I won’t have to break any rules! Come on, please? Please?” His reply was almost as fast as the ensuing pink hue that flooded the poor mare’s cheeks, the final prod breaching her defenses and ensuring that she would have to have to find some way to last through the week, just long enough so that somepony else could explain what “wrestling” really meant. Whoa, that feels funny. Oh no. No, stop it! Wonderfully soft, full of versatility, and aggravatingly obstinate when chastised, Fluttershy’s wings slowly began to unfurl, pressing against Whisper’s chest which, while he didn’t understand what the motion meant, found their downy softness strangely pleasant. I didn’t mean that last thought, really! I mean, it would be nice, but I don’t... no! No, no, no! Whisper was instantly concerned as she pulled away, shaking softly as her wings bore testament to her inner thoughts. “I’m sorry, did I say something wrong?” “N-no!” she replied quickly, though still not turning around. I need to calm down, I’m worrying him. Wait a minute... why do I... need to feel so nervous? It’s Whisper... He’s safe. Her pulse slowed, and she slowly turned herself around, letting her wings stretch out without further resistance and looking up with confidence at eyes full of worry. “I’m very sorry for scaring you, Whisper. Your question just caught me a little off guard, I think. It’s ok...” she said softly, placing a hoof on his chest and dropping her gaze, a faint smile playing at her lips. “That kind of wrestling is something special, and you can only do it with somepony you really love, and only after you’ve known somepony for a very long time. At least, that’s what I think.” “Oh, ok.” I have more questions, but I’m sure I’ll learn. I don’t want to make her feel all strange again. Still, kissing on the muzzle looked... better than the nose. Oh well, I can try that later, maybe. Hey, no, stop that. “Don’t be sad, Fluttershy.” Yay, she’s laughing! “I’m not sad, Whisper. Tonight was amazing, and there’s... just one more thing I’d like to do, if you feel like you can move.” Even if he hadn’t, if it made Fluttershy smile, he would have run to Canterlot and back. “Anything you want, Fluttershy.” “Do you think...” Please say yes... “If it’s ok with you, I’d really like it if you danced with me. If you’re feeling ok, that is...” She wasn’t expecting the covers to fly off so fast, but with speed not befitting somepony injured like himself, he bolted out of the bedroom and stood eagerly awaiting his partner in the center of the living room. Trotting over to her stereo, she soon found a very intrigued green stallion staring at her every move, and rather than explain, she pressed play and closed her eyes, expecting slow, classical and instead receiving a slightly deafening intro to bass-filled club music, which she immediately terminated for fear of Whisper hearing the lyrics. Flickering emerald letters quickly let her know he had. “Buck my... what’d she say?” he asked, tilting his head to one side. “Oh, nothing really, so, um, don’t worry about it.” He can never hear that music. Never ever. Swapping discs to the one she had originally intended, she led him back to the center as the soft, orchestral melody filled the house. “Ok, now stand up like this... oh, careful!” she said, quickly reaching out as he nearly toppled over backwards and pulling him into her hooves. “I told you, I’m probably just going to mess everything up...” “Whisper... I won’t let you fall.” There was no hesitation or second guessing, just a heartfelt proclamation that banished self-doubt and all that remained of anxiety. “Now, follow my lead. Put your hooves... here,” she whispered, placing his hooves just above her flanks while wrapping hers around his neck. By mutual support they found their balance, slowly beginning to sway back and forth in time with the music. For a time, they simply swayed in silence, but as her heart filled to bursting, Fluttershy had to let it out. “Thank you... I never imagined a single night could be so much fun, but this...” She pressed closer, his hooves sliding around to her back as her wings spread wide. “This is something... I’ve wanted for a very long time...” She squeezed a little tighter as all her moments spent dancing in the hopes of one day sharing it with one she cared for came to fruition. Desire bloomed like a beauteous rose, and Whisper closed his eyes as he felt her soft lips pressed gently against the side of his neck while they continued to sway. “I can’t... begin to find the words to tell you how much...” She pulled away and his hooves slid a little higher, resting just at the base of her wings. The moment, the setting... the opportunity would be lost if she didn’t act. But Fluttershy didn't fully understand just how deeply in tune with her heart Whisper truly was. Her aching for somepony to share in her world, the longing to feel safe and accepted, and the fear of being left all alone: of these things, their hearts beat with one accord. Whisper could feel the magic stirred inside of him, but right then, the entirety of his focus, nay, of his being, was directed only upon the mare who looked into his terrifying crimson eyes not with revulsion, but adoration. Please... Whisper, I... I want... Her breath caught as he leaned a little closer, his warm breath brushing her face as his horn bathed her in a pale, jade light. Does... does he really know... what this means? “Fluttershy... I can’t describe what’s inside with words... but I’d like to show you.” All of her anticipation, coupled with years of wonder and longing reached crescendo as she closed her eyes, the realization that her very last wish for her perfect evening was to be granted. The music continued to play in the background as timid, gentle lips touched her own, sending a rush of sparks mingled with embers coursing through her veins. The dizziness and euphoria... the closeness and connection... the safety, the desire free from all shame and doubt... it was everything she had dreamed it could be, and more.