“Do you think the Legionnaires will make it to Roads Crossed safely?” Fluttershy asked as she followed Purple Heart towards the town of Mistakwe. When Purple Heart had presented himself to the surviving Legionnaires still inside the Emerald Legion’s home base, he’d been met with mixed emotions. Some were overjoyed at his survival. Most were displeased at his lack of support for them during their time of need. There were even several who had become outright hostile their Primarch upon seeing him, much like Tray Tore had. All of them however listened to his explanation and accepted his apology for not returning to them.
Then came the decision: would they still follow Purple Heart?
The answer was mixed, just as their reactions and emotions were when they met him. A fair number, most of them wounded, refused his offer and elected to stay as far away from the conflict between Purple Heart and Bael as was physically possible. Of the sixty ponies still alive after Bael’s coup, only fifteen agreed to follow Purple Heart. Tray Tore was not among them.
However, when they’d set out for Mistakwe to find the Hare Clans, Tray Tore had told them that there were still pockets of Legionnaires around the countryside who might still follow Purple Heart’s command. The previous fifteen ponies they had gathered in the main base had grown to encompass nearly three hundred after they’d found other groups of Legionnaires. Some had refused to follow Purple Heart and others had even attacked them. Despite the hostility Purple Heart had been met with, a significant number of Legionnaires were still loyal to him
“The only Legionnaires who stayed and wanted to join me are ones that weren’t injured and were eager to fight to avenge their comrades,” Purple Heart responded, eyeing the surrounding foliage critically. “They’ll move quickly without being weighed down by injured ponies and they want to follow me in the first place. They’ll get there.” They were travelling away from a recent battleground where they’d failed to convince the Legionnaires to join them. Lately, they’d been met with failure after failure to convince more Legionnaires to join them. Purple Heart suspected why, but kept the knowledge to himself for the moment.
“Are you ever going to apologize for shouting at the birds?” Fluttershy asked, eyeing the purple earth pony critically.
“I did apologize!” he grumbled. “I even translated for you!”
“‘I’m going to be King of the Pirates’?” the yellow pegasus recalled. “You could have at least helped them back into their tree.”
Earlier in the day, just a short time after Purple Heart had ordered the third group of combat ready Legionnaires to amass at Roads Crossed, Twilight had called Telepathy Collect to grill the colts about their respective Villains. During his explanation about Bael, Purple Heart had unwittingly shouted while Fluttershy had been attending to a nest of birds that had been dislodged from their tree. It was after Fluttershy had rapped Purple Heart soundly on the head did he resolve to never shout or surprise any animal, big or small, in the kind pegasus’ presence.
“Does it look like I can fly?” Purple Heart groused. His yellow companion turned her head and arched an eyebrow at him.
“It wouldn’t have hurt to try,” she said primly. She continued walking, leaving a gaping Purple Heart behind her.
I’m being emotionally abused by a pegasus one fifth my mass, he thought. Why am I not stopping her?
Sighing in resignation, he resumed walking, his longer strides allowing him to catch up with Fluttershy quickly. Once he’d drawn abreast with her, his pace slowed to match the mare’s.
“So,” he said, wanting to plan a bit, “there’s one last pocket of Legionnaires that are on the fence about me. I think we should hit them up and see what they think before making our way towards Mistakwe. I think the Hare Clans owe me a favor.”
“How?” Fluttershy asked, her tone back to its usual softness. She looked at him, eyes bright with curiosity.
“I prevented a battle from taking place,” Purple Heart replied, puffing his chest out. “Really proud of that.”
“How?” Fluttershy repeated. He stifled a grimace.
“By appealing to their better nature?” the purple earth pony tried. Fluttershy glared at him. With a sigh, Purple Heart relented. “Okay, fine. I suggested that Mistakwe allow the Hares to build an embassy within its walls so that the Hares could keep returning for the Bunnglen and Mistakwe could keep existing.” Her continued gaze upon him gave him the impression that she knew he wasn’t telling everything. “I may have also threatened them a bit.”
“WHAT?!”
Fluttershy’s resounding shriek of surprise and horror upset a significant number of peaceful, undisturbed wildlife into scattering.
“Damn,” Purple Heart swore. “Probably shouldn’t have said that. How do I get out of this situation...”
“Explain!” Fluttershy hissed, looking remarkably furious at the purple earth pony’s words and prior actions. She darted over to him and brought herself nose to nose with the large stallion. Jerking back to maintain a safe distance from the irate mare, Purple Heart sighed once more in resignation, cutting his eyes away to break contact with Fluttershy’s questioning yet rage-filled gaze.
“Is it possible that we just forget this and move along?” he pleaded.
“No.”
“This is not the colt you’re looking for.” He waved a hoof under her nose.
“Explain.”
“Move along.” He waved again.
“PURPLE HEART!”
“Okay! Fine! I’ll tell!” He paused, remaining silent in hopes that she’d let him off the hook.
“...I’m waiting,” she snapped
“Do you know the Muffin Colt?”
“Explain or I will drop Totoro on you.” Fluttershy’s voice was dark and cold.
Purple Heart squeaked and nodded swiftly, knowing his death when he saw and heard it. He inhaled to calm his nerves.
“Understand,” Purple Heart urged, “carrying out my threat was my last course of action. I wanted them to make peace and yet they were stubborn. Only after I mentioned the deaths of their collective young and threatened to demolish their communities did they listen. I’m not proud of it, but it happened. It’s over with. Let’s move on.” He waited for Fluttershy’s response, looking cautiously at the yellow pegasus.
“I’m not happy that you threatened them,” she said finally. “But I’m satisfied that it didn’t come to violence. Don’t do it again.”
“Aye, ma’am,” he said promptly, saluting the pegasus.
As she turned to resume moving along the path, air whooshed out of Purple Heart in an exhale of relief. He hadn’t realized how badly a disappointed Fluttershy could make him feel.
“Never disappoint ‘Shy again,” he declared softly to himself. “Ever.”
“Come on,” Fluttershy called from ahead. “I think we’re coming up to the last group of Legionnaires.” Shaking himself to relieve the last tremors of shame inflicted by the yellow pegasus, Purple Heart broke out into a swift trot to catch up with the mare.
“One last group and then on to Mistakwe to charm some Hares,” he said, drawing abreast once again. “I think this recruiting spree has gone pretty well. Of course, now that I’ve said that, it’ll come back to punch us in the teeth.”
“You, Wits, and Light Patch aren’t the most positive of colts,” Fluttershy noted.
“We just know when we manage to shoot ourselves in the foot,” he replied nonchalantly, seeing her frown out of the corner of his eye. Carp. What did I say to piss her off now?
“‘Shoot ourselves in the foot’?” she echoed. “A turn of phrase from being human?”
“Oh, yeah,” Purple Heart confirmed, sighing mentally in relief.
“What does it mean?”
“There’s a whole background behind that phrase and we’ll be at the spot by the time I even start explaining.”
“Then make it simpler,” she suggested.
“Roight,” he sighed. “Shooting one’s self in the foot is akin to-”
“Making a mistake that comes back to hurt you in the end,” a smug voice interrupted. The pair of ponies froze as they entered the small clearing where the final group of Legionnaires were supposed to be. The Legionnaires were there alright.
Bael was there too.
“ACK! NOPE! ABSCOND! FLEE WE MUST!” Purple Heart immediately grabbed Fluttershy and tried to run away from Bael and his minions as quickly as possible.
Key word being ‘tried’.
“Aww,” Bael groaned petulantly, appearing directly in front of the fleeing Purple Heart and highly surprised and confused Fluttershy. “Leaving already?”
“I really, really, really, want to leave,” Purple Heart begged, eyes darting feverishly around to find another avenue of escape.
“Well, that’s damn shame, isn’t it, lads?” Bael pouted, looking over Purple Heart’s shoulder at the Legionnaires arrayed around the other half of the clearing. Feeling as if the bipedal being was giving him a free pass, Purple Heart looked around and gaped at the number of Legionnaires Bael had gathered under his banner. Purple Heart’s suspicions were confirmed: Bael had been gathering the Legionnaires that Purple Heart couldn’t and had also convinced some to join before the Purple Barbarian had even reached them. Fluttershy seemed to notice and understood this as well, judging from her expression of awe and realization.
“Sooooo,” Purple Heart hummed, drawing out the vowel, “what happens now? Do you monologue for five minutes before finally deciding to kill us?”
Bael chuckled, walking past Purple Heart back to the Legionnaires. He ruffled the purple earth pony’s mane as he passed. “Kill you?” he chortled. “Nah. It’s too early for that. You aren’t at your peak right now and defeating you while you’re without the rest of your friends would be pointless.”
“Then why do this?” Fluttershy asked, finally plucking up the courage to speak to the powerful villain.
Bael pondered the question, tapping a finger to his chin. “Because I have to,” he said finally. “The fallen god being gave me an order to follow when I was created. Unfortunately, even with his forced abdication, I can’t ignore that last command. So, I have to carry it out by making your task as difficult as possible. Hence the Legionnaires on my side and not yours.”
“So your purpose is to be a pain in my hind end for the entire adventure?”
“Jah.”
“...You’re succeeding.”
“Aren’t I just?”
“Now what?”
“Now we leave.”
“...Wat? You’re serious?”
“Why wouldn’t I be? You’re not ready to fight me yet and killing you know would be very unsatisfying for me.”
“...Oh. Thanks?”
“Don’t thank me yet,” Bael warned, signalling to his Legionnaires to depart. “We’re not even at the home stretch, daddy dearest. Things are just about to get fun. Enjoy your Real Time Strategy. I’ll see you at the citadel” He turned and left, leaving a surprised and an extremely concerned Fluttershy.
“What now?” she asked weakly, still shivering from the close encounter with one of the strongest beings around at the moment.
“I think we should make all haste to Mistakwe,” Purple Heart decided. “We’re going to need all the help we can get.”
* * *
Bael felt particularly pleased with himself. He’d removed assets from his enemy’s grasp, bolstered his own force of soldiers, and properly terrified his adversary all in the same five minutes. Not a bad day at all.
“Lord Bael,” one of the Legionnaires addressed him as the battalion followed Bael through the forest underbrush, “why leave the Pretender alive? He usurped your rightful place as Master of the Daemon Ponies! Shouldn’t he be punished for such insolence?!”
Bael arched an eyebrow at the stallion beside him. A red pegasus with a flamboyant tail and mane that was colored a strange mix of iron grey and green strode along beside Bael. His green eyes were bright with rage and displeasure at Purple Heart’s continued existence.
“Your name was Wren, right?” Bael asked, his tone bored. The red pegasus nodded, either ignoring his superior’s tone or simply not recognizing it.
“It is, Lord Bael,” the pegasus confirmed. “Wren Hayer is my name.”
“Huh,” Bael grunted, looking away from the apparently hot-blooded colt. “Well, Egg Layer-”
“Wren Hayer,” the pegasus corrected.
“Right, that’s what I said.” Bael rolled his shoulders and raised his hands in front of him as if he was holding a large ball between them in front of his chest. “Now, I didn’t kill the Purple Barbarian because I didn’t have to. I’m not obligated to do so, for now. I’m just egging him along, making him grow so that the fight will be more satisfying. For me.”
Wren frowned in confusion at Bael, head cocked to one side. “You just want a good fight?” the pegasus asked.
“Of course!” Bael chortled. “Fighting a weak, insufferable layabout like yourself would be boring and a waste of my time! Keep talking and I’ll demonstrate, Hen Frayer.”
“It’s Wren Hayer!” the red pegasus corrected again.
“Nuance,” Bael waved a hand. “And shut up. I’m not going to tell you any more of my plans.”
“There’s more?” Wren inquired, not seeing his death coming at all.
“The nerve of these pests,” Bael grumbled, backhanding the pegasus away from him and into the sky. “Fly, Ben Drayer, if you want to live! You’ve got the wings for it!”
A response echoed back to Bael, which he ignored, electing instead to sigh in irritation and pick at his nose. “Now I understand why Garp does this,” he grumbled, continuing on his way with a battalion of very anxious Daemon-ponies behind him.
* * *
“Do you need a break, Purple Heart?” Fluttershy asked worriedly, watching as the large stallion galloped down the path at a solid clip. Purple Heart had been keeping this same pace for some time now ever since Bael had scared them soundly and left them to attend to his own business. And now, it finally looked like Purple Heart’s consistent running was starting to wear on him.
Gasping for breath, Purple Heart slowed to a more moderate canter. He was still moving quickly, but not full tilt as he had been previously. “I’ll take a nice long break when we get to Mistakwe,” he panted. “We’re racing against the clock right now and I don’t like how Bael managed to convince more Legionnaires to join him over me.”
“Didn’t you say that they were changed because of something Bael did?” Fluttershy asked.
“Well, yeah,” Purple Heart allowed as he sped up to a gallop. “But what Bael did was give them some of his power. Which, until Discord decided to get cute, had been my power.”
“When will you stop being mean to Discord?” the yellow pegasus asked worriedly. “He’s doing his best with what he has.” Purple Heart snorted.
“So?” he growled in response, slowing down once more. “If he hadn’t gone rooting around in our heads and giving the broadest kind of order to what are basically super villains, he wouldn’t have to be scrambling to protect you all.”
Fluttershy felt like she’d been frowning more often than smiling lately, due to interactions with the colts. “Are you blaming Discord again?” she asked stiffly, feeling understandably sick and tired of Purple Heart’s attitude.
“Little bit,” the purple earth pony admitted, returning to a faster pace. “But I don’t think ragging on him will help much.”
“It won’t,” Fluttershy mumbled darkly.
“The only reason why I’m truly pissed off at Discord is because he couldn’t leave well enough alone,” Purple Heart said. “I don’t mind that I was pulled from my world and brought into this one for fun, heck, the first part of the campaign was even enjoyable! But now… Now things have changed. All because Discord wanted to make things a bit more interesting. Welp, the Road to Hell is paved with questionable intentions.” During this little monologue, the purple stallion had slowed down, sped up, slowed down, and sped up. Fluttershy blinked at this. She couldn’t decide which to question: Purple Heart’s phrase regarding ‘hell’ or his alternating speed. She chose the latter.
“Why do you keep changing speed?” she asked, hovering above his shoulder.
“To keep a relative pace without wearing myself out too much,” was his reply. “Sharpe’s Rifles do it. Moving over long distances while retaining a speed can be exhausting. Less so when you alternate between jogging and walking.”
“Ah. Interesting.”
“It’s useful too,” he replied. “Now, I think we’re in the general vicinity of some Hares. Let’s see if we can recruit them to help save the queendom.”
“Give us one good reason why we should,” a gruff voice called from a set of bushes to their right. Fluttershy and Purple Heart immediately stopped their forward motion and blinked at the speaking bushes.
“Either I’m still paranoid about Bael sneaking up on us or there’s a Hetzer hiding in there,” Purple Heart whispered. Once again, Fluttershy got the feeling that she was missing out on some kind of inside joke that only humans understood.
“A hetzer?” she questioned out of curiosity.
“A German Tank Destroyer,” Purple Heart replied as he advanced slowly on the bushes. “Pretty solid little machine. Excellent camo rating and good armor sloping if you know how to angle correctly. Fantastic gun if you know how to use it. Also has a derp gun if you so choose. Terrifying little thing if you arm high explosive rounds and point at a tier three. Not so good against higher tiers though... I really miss my KV-1…”
“Ehm, Purple Heart? You’re rambling.”
“Huh… So I am.”
“Will you kindly shut up?” the talking bush growled.
“Shutting up,” Purple Heart replied promptly. “…Are you a fighting Hare of the Hare Clans?”
“What did I just say?”
“I’ll take that as a ‘no’ then,” Purple Heart said smartly.
“Are you going to shut up any time soon?”
“Oh, sure… Yeah, no. I guess the freaking out from ten minutes ago finally set in.”
“Is he always like this?” the bush asked, addressing Fluttershy.
“No,” the yellow pegasus replied, eyeing her companion worriedly. “We did have a bit of a shock a while ago. That was actually the first time I’ve seen him scared enough to start rambling.”
“Huh,” the bush grunted. “And I thought he was an impressive warrior that scared our leaders into signing a treaty with Mistakwe’s governing body.” Fluttershy whirled around to glare at the still rambling Purple Heart. He was muttering about elections and international opinion. Feeling that his panic had run its course, Fluttershy tapped Purple Heart on the shoulder.
“You threatened cute little bunnies?” she asked, her voice cold and threatening.
“Nope,” he replied. Breathing a sigh of relief, Fluttershy turned back to the bush.
“I threatened combat ready Hares that could have spread me as Purple Pony Paste on toast with a side of carrots,” Purple Heart amended. In a bout of sheer displeasure, Fluttershy smacked the purple stallion upside the head.
“Owch!” he squawked, jerking around to glare at the mare as he rubbed the back of his head. “What was that for?!” His cobalt eyes met Fluttershy’s displeased light blue orbs and he was immediately cowed.
“Sorry,” he said meekly. Fluttershy gave a small smile.
“You’re forgiven.”
“If I didnae know better, I’d say he was whipped,” a new voice mused, this one coming from the tree above the talking bush.
“I’ll say,” the bush agreed. The two ponies froze and whirled on the talking foliage.
“Okay, enough shenanigans,” Purple Heart growled as he advanced on the bush and tree.
“Methinks the colt be a might displeased,” the tree chortled.
“Gee, I wonder what gave you that impression,” Purple Heart snapped. “Can I just talk to the Hares Clan Heads please? I have a request.”
“Oho, a request he says,” the tree sneered. “Bet he wants us to sell our skins for profit. As if threatening us into a treaty wasn’t enough.”
“HEY!” Purple Heart barked. “I wanted to find a peaceful solution that didn’t rely on Hares and ponies killing each other to make a point. If I had let you fight it out, there’d be no one left to get the spoils. Everyone would be dead.”
“And you’d make sure of that?” the bush griped.
“Yes... I mean NO!”
“Give us one good reason to bring you to the Heads again,” the tree said. “A reason that doesn’t include ‘for the good of the Hares’.”
“Fine,” Purple Heart grumbled. “Would you rather live free to be as you are or live in fear under the iron fist of three villains?” The foliage fell silent as they considered the Purple Barbarian’s argument.
“The bruise makes a fair point,” the bush allowed.
“Indeed the laddie buck does,” the tree agreed. “I, however, am still not convinced that we should bring the bruise within a hair’s breadth of the Clan Heads.”
Purple Heart instantly heard the pun and puffed his cheeks to keep from laughing and further displeasing the hares. He couldn’t risk their potential assistance by laughing at their leaders. He’d already threatened them. It wouldn’t be easy to ask for their help after that.
“What can I do to convince you to allow me an audience?” he asked the tree and bush. Once again, the foliage fell silent as they considered his question and possibly communed with each other in some fashion. Fluttershy hovered several paces behind the purple earth pony, letting him speak and argue his case. She was still displeased over Purple Heart’s methods to persuade the Hares to assist him in the first place. If he tried the same things to get them to work with him this time, Fluttershy resolved to take matters into her own hooves.
By smacking Purple Heart soundly and glaring him into silence so that she could take over.
A chuckle came from the tree. “Looks like the mare’s got this boy beat.”
“Maybe that’s why he looks like a giant bruise!” the bush retorted. The two pieces of foliage laughed heartily as Purple Heart frowned off one side, as if showing his displeasure to an unseen audience.
“Hum, what could the bruise do,” the bush mused. “We could send him to fetch something that’ll prove his worth.”
Purple Heart immediately clenched his jaw to stifle a groan of disbelief. His tense expression was noticed by Fluttershy and she blinked curiously at him.
“Toothache?” she asked.
“Fetch quest,” Purple Heart whispered. “Hate those things. And yet, Windward is full of them.”
“What’s wrong with fetch quests?” the pegasus inquired.
“Find a thing, fight off anyone else in the way of the thing, puzzle your way to get the thing, bring it back to sender,” Purple Heart explained. He winced. “Tedious little time wasters.”
“Heard that,” the tree scoffed.
“Fudge bollocks,” Purple Heart swore.
“He could fight a monstrous beast?” the bush suggested.
“Nah, too simple,” the tree denied. “He’d just demolish it. It’s what the laddie buck does.”
Purple Heart blinked. “No I don’t,” he groused.
“What do you call threatening us into a treaty then?” the tree sneered.
“Passive aggressive negotiations,” the stallion replied promptly.
The foliage considered the answer while Fluttershy glared at Purple Heart. The purple earth pony winced under her gaze.
“Sorry,” he whimpered, slouching away from the yellow mare. She jerked her head in a satisfied nod.
“Good boy,” she said. “Now, apologize to the nice rabbits.”
Nodding meekly, Purple Heart walked over to the bush and tree. He bowed his head and mumbled something under his breath.
“Couldn’t hear yah laddie buck,” the tree called.
“Speak up,” the bush said.
“Try again, Purple Heart,” Fluttershy ordered.
“‘M sorry,” the purple stallion mumbled.
“Better.” Fluttershy smiled gently and patted Purple Heart on the head.
“Could’ve been more coherent instead of a slur,” the bush muttered. The leaves of the shrub shivered under Fluttershy’s sudden glare.
“Be nice,” she ordered, pointing a commanding hoof at the bush. “He apologized. That’s the most I’ve seen him do ever. Be grateful he did at all.”
“I say!” the tree chortled. “We should let the mare talk to the Clan Heads! She’s allowed as far as I’m concerned!”
The bush hmm’d. “But what if she gets tired of barking orders?”
“Why would she?” the tree responded. “She’s already a little horse!” The two were silent for a moment as the words sunk in, followed immediately by another round of laughter from the foliage. Purple Heart bit his tongue, an urge to cause damage to the shrubbery rising.
“I’m not the one who needs help,” Fluttershy denied. “Purple Heart is. The more subordinates he has, the stronger their collective abilities. At least, that’s what he told me. I’m sure he’s correct.” She spun around, freezing Purple Heart with another glare. “That is, if you were telling me the truth.”
He rapidly bobbed his head in the affirmative. “It’s true!” he squeaked, his tone high with panic.
Fluttershy nodded her head, satisfied. “Good,” she said, looking back to the bush and tree. “Now, can we please meet the with Clan Heads? We’re in a bit of a rush.”
“Eh… Sure!” the bush agreed. “Follow us.” The underbrush of the forest shook with the hare’s passing, much like the greenery of the trees overhead.
“Thank you,” Purple Heart said gratefully, inclining his head respectfully to the commanding presence of the pegasus.
“I’m keeping my eyes on you, Purple Heart,” Fluttershy warned. “I expect you to be a better pony...human from now on. No more threats.”
“Yes, ma’am,” the large stallion replied meekly, following after the hares into the forest.