//------------------------------// // Finding His Muse // Story: Shining Armor Follows His Muse // by Chengar Qordath //------------------------------// It all started off so simply. Mom asked me to do a favor for a family friend, and I agreed because ... well, everything at home goes a lot smoother if Mom’s happy. I might not live with my parents anymore, but I still visited often enough that I didn’t want to give Mom an excuse to lay on the maternal guilt trips about how I couldn’t do a single small favor for her after she’d loved and supported me for my whole life. Don’t get me wrong, Mom’s great, but when she asks you to do something, it’s best for everyone if you just do it. When Mom’s not happy... Well, her unhappiness gets a bit contagious. But that’s why I was spending my Saturday on the other side of Canterlot, poking around a fairly nice apartment complex and searching for unit number 111A instead of meeting up with my buddies for our usual weekend game. Or helping Twily look for her favorite books in the library. Or hanging out with Cadance. Or ... well, any of the things I normally like to do during the weekends. After a couple minutes of searching, I finally found the right one. It didn’t look like anything special—just another bland but generically nice apartment in the complex. The only noticeable thing was that all the blinds were down and the lights were off. I had to wonder if that meant nopony was home: maybe the mare Mom had sent me to talk to was out? Out doing something fun, the way most ponies would on a Saturday afternoon. Except for ponies who got roped into doing a favor for their mother instead. Still, I wasn’t going to assume that nopony was home just because the lights were out. Mom certainly wouldn’t be amused if I walked away without even checking. I walked up to the front door and knocked. Nopony answered. I knocked some more, just to make sure she could hear me. I wanted to make sure I’d covered all my bases if Mom asked. Just when I was about to give up, I heard somepony shuffling around inside. I waited patiently until the front door finally opened, revealing a pair of bleary pink eyes beneath a messy electric blue mane. The unicorn mare glowered blearily at me. “Whadaya want?” I answered with a friendly smile. “Hey, are you Vinyl Scratch? Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up.” She yawned and stretched. “I ... think so? S’too early to be sure. Wha’s...” She rubbed her eyes, then did a double-take at my uniform and stepped back. “Oh! Hey, Mister Guard Pony! Um ... is this about the thing last night?” I couldn’t help but be just a bit curious when it came to what she was talking about. “And what thing would that be?” “Look, I didn’t even see anything,” Vinyl groused. “I was busy DJing, and I don’t see what the big deal is anyway. It’s a nightclub, ponies are gonna get a little rowdy sometimes. You certainly didn’t have to wake me up this early just to bug me about it.” I couldn’t let that one pass without comment. “It’s one in the afternoon.” “And I was DJing at a nightclub,” she grumbled. “C’mon in then. Lemme get some coffee in me and I’ll answer whatever you wanna ask.” I trotted into her apartment and was instantly reminded of the dorm rooms of a couple of my less tidy college friends. The place wasn’t a complete pigsty, but there was a large trash bag full of empty cider bottles and pizza boxes. There were a few well-used couches in the center of the room, but most of the apartment’s free space was taken up by an impressive collection of musical equipment. Which I suppose was no surprise, given Vinyl’s occupation. Despite my curiosity over just what she’d gotten up to last night, I figured it was time to clear things up. Once I was settled on a reasonably clean sofa opposite from the one Vinyl was sitting on, I cleared my throat and got to it. “Actually, I’m not here about whatever happened last night. I’m here because—” The rest of that sentence died on my lips as another mare stepped out of the bedroom, the bedsheet wrapped around her like a cloak. I probably shouldn’t have been staring quite so hard at her, but she was an absolute knockout. A light pink coat just a shade off of Cadance’s, a long, luxurious white mane, and the sort of build you usually only see on a fashion model. Even though she’d obviously just gotten out of bed and hadn’t made herself up, she still looked good. Real good. Good enough that I felt a bit guilty for noticing how good she looked. Okay, technically there was no reason I should feel guilty. I was a single, unattached stallion. Despite my best efforts to correct that with Cadance. It ... it was a bit complicated. I’d tried to let her know how I felt about her, and it had kind of gone horribly wrong. Somehow the conversation ended with her thinking that I wasn’t interested in mares. I just don’t know what went wrong and to be honest, I’d been so mortified I couldn’t even think of a way to fix it. So really, there was no reason I shouldn’t be allowed to look at another attractive mare. And yet, I still felt guilty. Being in love does strange things to a pony. She must have noticed me trying not to drool, because she shot me a grin and turned to Vinyl, her voice coming out as a seductive purr. “Vinyl, why didn’t you tell me we had company? And such handsome company, too.” She languidly settled down next to Vinyl on her sofa, her eyes lingering on me the whole time. Vinyl scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Down, Musette, you just met him. Besides, he’s here on Guard business.” I cleared my throat and tried very hard to not look too closely at the mare. “Right. I’m a guardpony. This is what guardponies look like. Well, not all of us, some of us look different. And ... um ... anyway, I'm Lieutenant Shining Armor of the Royal Guard. I’m actually not here on official business, this is more of a ... um ... well my mother asked me to help you out. Twilight Velvet. That’s my mom’s name. She, uh, she said you were having some trouble with an overenthusiastic fan?” Vinyl groaned, running a hoof down her face. “Ugh, Mooom!” She shook her head and grumbled several things under her breath. “I told her it wasn’t a big deal and not to freak out about it. But instead ... well, I think you know what happened.” I shot her a confused look, and she glowered at me. “My mom. Quill Scratch, works for your dad. Ringing any bells?” “Oh, right!” I blinked, then stared at her. “Wait, you’re Quill’s daughter? Geeze, no wonder Mom wanted me to help you out. Quill’s been working for Dad forever.” “Longer than I’ve been around,” Vinyl agreed. “Guess I oughta be flattered her boss sent his son to sort this out. Y’know, if not for the fact that this is all a huge waste of time because there isn’t actually a problem and my mom’s freaking out over nothing.” Vinyl’s friend Musette pointedly cleared her throat. “Vinyl, I know you want to be fearless and tough, but I’m scared of that crazy mare. What if she tries to hurt you? I would feel just awful if something happened to you.” “Our mothers both seemed to think it was a big enough deal for me to come here,” I pointed out. “And if your mother’s anything like mine, she’s not going to let this drop until she’s satisfied. If you don’t let me help you, she’ll just find some other way to get involved.” Vinyl’s expression reminded me of the look on Twily’s face as a filly whenever she needed to take some especially nasty medicine. “Yeah, you’re probably right. And whatever she comes up with next would probably be even worse than dragging you in.” “Exactly.” Musette shot me a loaded look that sent some very inappropriate thoughts rushing into my brain. Or at least the part of me that was doing a lot of thinking. “Let's be nice to the big, strong, handsome guardpony who's here to help us.” Her eyes slowly travelled up and down my body. “In whatever way we want.” I cleared my throat and tried very hard to put all of the unprofessional thoughts Musette was inspiring out of my head. Not even Cadance had this kind of effect on me. With Cadance I was usually just so comfortable around her that those kind of thoughts didn’t bother me so much. I mean, obviously I found her very attractive, but it wasn’t anything like the raw lust Musette seemed to inspire. Fortunately, one of the many things I learned at West Hoof was self-discipline. I put those thoughts out of my mind with a conscious effort of will. “I'd like to hear what's going on myself. If it's nothing, then it's nothing and I assure your mom that everything's okay. If something is wrong, then I can help deal with the situation and calm your mother down.” “Fine, fine,” Vinyl grumbled, waving her hooves in concession. “The sooner we get this over with, the sooner things can go back to normal.” “Alright then.” I might have gone into the purely military side of the Guard, but I knew enough about law enforcement to have a decent idea of how it all worked. Plus ... well, I had read a few detective books. That had to count for something. “So, what can you tell me about this pony who’s been bothering you? Name, distinguishing features, anything?” Vinyl shrugged. “Didn’t get a name or anything. To be honest, I didn’t even really notice any kind of problem until Musette pointed her out. As far as features ... earth pony, light grey coat, dark grey mane, purple eyes. Looked kinda snobby too—you know, one of those real upper class types? Kinda stands out from the usual sorts of ponies in the nightclub scene, but I figured she was just trying to slum it and doing a bad job of it. She wouldn’t be the first hoity-toity noble or spoiled daughter of a rich merchant who wanted to party with the commoners.” I cleared my throat and decided not to mention that I was technically part of the Canterlot nobility, and while I wasn’t a party animal, I’d certainly gone out on the town a few times back when I was in West Hoof. “Right. So what exactly has she done to cause a problem?” The DJ rubbed at the back of her mane. “Just shown up at my concerts and stuff. I’ve never even talked to her or anything.” “All of your concerts!” Musette shivered. “And the way she looks at you. I'm afraid she’s planning to do something awful. And don’t forget that package I told you about...” Vinyl blinked and shook her head. “Right right, that. It was ... yeah, that was a little freaky. Musette found a present sitting in front of the door one night. You know, all nice and wrapped up with a bow on top. And inside of it was a dead rat.” Okay, that definitely qualified as messed up. “I don’t suppose you still have it? There might be some evidence.” “Oh no, I got rid of that awful thing as soon as I saw it.” Musette trembled, pressing herself against Vinyl and getting a comforting hug in return. I probably should’ve expected that. Most ponies wouldn’t want to hang on to a box with a dead rat in it. “Right, then. And did your stalker include anything that would tie this back to her? If she left the box I could probably arrest her for it, but the charges won’t stick if I don’t have some way to prove she’s the one who did it.” Not to mention I’d probably get in a fair bit of trouble. After all, I was a palace guard playing amateur detective as a favor to a family friend. The law enforcement division would definitely get mad about me sticking my nose in their domain if I botched this, and my superiors wouldn’t back me up. Sure, Mom and Dad would have enough pull to shield me from the worst of the fallout, but I really didn’t want to depend on them to protect me from my own screw-ups. “Sorry,” Vinyl grimaced, shaking her head. “It’s not like she left a return address on it, or included a note with her name and cutie mark.” “But you can do something, right?” Musette pleaded, her eyes wide and desperate. “I don't feel safe anymore. Not with her around. Every time I hear a strange sound or see something out of the corner of my eyes, I have to wonder if she’s finally making her move.” I frowned and thought it over. Without any evidence I couldn’t really do anything official about the stalker. The only way to actually get some would be to wait for her to do something else or stake out Vinyl’s home and concerts until the perp did something arrestable. Neither of those options sounded very good to me; waiting for the bad guy to do something else was never a good strategy, and I definitely didn’t want to spend days or even weeks putting all my free time into fixing this. So if official solutions were out, maybe it was time to try something unofficial. “I could always talk to this mare. A lot of these types of ponies aren’t insane monsters or anything—they just have poor social skills and don’t really understand where the proper boundaries are. Not to mention having a guardpony tell them to cut it out makes a pretty strong impression.” “It’s worth a shot,” Vinyl agreed. “I thought about trying to talk to her myself, but Musette was afraid that’d just set her off.” “She is a crazy stalker who seems to be obsessed with you and has already sent us threatening messages,” Musette rather reasonably pointed out. “Who knows what she would do if you actually confronted her? It would probably just make things even worse. That’s why your mother asked Shining to help us.” Her gaze shifted to me, giving me a heavy-lidded look that promised all sorts of interesting things. “Our protector, here to keep us safe...” “Um...” I cleared my throat and tried very hard to ignore that look and act like a professional. Because I was a professional. A totally professional guardpony who definitely wasn’t shifting around on the couch to hide the effect that look was having on me. Yup. Professionalism was practically my middle name. “I, well, I’m just doing my duty, ma’am.” “And we appreciate that so much...” Musette’s tone and eyes making it clear exactly how she planned to express that appreciation. Which I admit I found more than a little intriguing despite my better judgement. With a name like Shining Armor, I was pretty much obligated to look after damsels in distress, and Musette definitely seemed to qualify... Vinyl snorted and nudged her friend in the side. “Sheesh, Musey, don’t you think you’re coming on a little strong?” Musette blinked, and while it was hard to tell through her pink coat I suspected she was blushing a bit. “Oh. Right. Sorry, it’s just ... well the last few days have been so stressful, and I’m just so glad that it might all be getting taken care of.” She shot me a rather sheepish smile. “Maybe I overdid things a little bit, but I just wanted to say ... um, thank you..” Now I was the one blushing and rubbing my mane. Pretty girls smiling and thanking me tends to have that effect. “It’s fine. Kinda flattering, actually. It’s just—well—I’m just doing my duty. You gals need help, so I’m gonna help. You don’t owe me anything for that, it’s just the right thing to do.” A part of my brain wanted to add that while Musette certainly didn’t owe me anything, she was free to express her gratitude in whatever manner she desired. A part of my brain that I almost certainly shouldn’t listen to, no matter how tempting it was. Vinyl looked me over, then nodded approvingly. “Not bad. Okay, you pass the test—you’re on my official list of cool ponies. Want a cider?” I sighed and shook my head. “I probably shouldn’t be drinking. I presume you’ll be performing again tonight?” Vinyl shot me a flat look. “It’s Saturday night. I DJ at nightclubs. You can do the math.” When she put it like that the answer was pretty obvious, but I’ve learned the hard way that assuming things is a good way to get in trouble. “And yeah, Musey says Miss Psycho Fangirl is showing up every time I perform, so it’s a pretty safe bet she’ll be there.” “Right, so I think we’ve got a gameplan.” I nodded to myself. “I’ll show up at your performance, find your stalker, then take her aside for a few words. Nice and simple.” “Sounds like you got it wrapped up already.” Vinyl yawned, covering her mouth. “Well, I’m too awake to go back to sleep now, so I’m gonna make some coffee and have a cider. Either of you two want anything?” I thought about commenting on the fact that mixing cider and coffee was odd to begin with, especially when she’d just woken up, but thought better of it. Musette seemed to agree with the sentiment, because she shot me a sheepish grin as Vinyl trotted off to the kitchen. “Artists. They all have a few lovable eccentricities.” “Right.” Now that Vinyl was out of the room, I could finally ask about something that had been bugging me a bit. After all, she’d come out of Vinyl’s bedroom, but then... “So, um, you and Vinyl are...?” Musette grinned and giggled softly. “Just friends. Well, mostly friends.” She leaned forward and whispered. “Sometimes she does get a little affectionate when she’s on a creative roll, and I certainly don’t mind that, but nothing serious. Besides, getting involved with her would be...” She trailed off, frowning to herself. “Well, suffice to say I don’t think it would be a good idea. There are boundaries that need to be respected.” “You two work together?” I guessed. “In a manner of speaking.” She grinned, leaning back on the couch. “Vinyl’s a solo act when it comes to the performance itself, but she needs somepony to bounce ideas off of and give her opinions on any works in progress. Things like that.” “So you’re her sounding board?” Musette chuckled. “Oh, that makes it all sound so stiff and formal. I prefer to think of myself as a friend and roommate who just helps her out every once in awhile. Though I suppose it’s not an entirely altruistic relationship. I admit, sometimes it’s just so fascinating to watch her creating her art. The entire process is just ... incredible.” I couldn’t really think of anything similar, unless you counted when Twily went into a studying frenzy. And that sight wasn’t so much inspiring as it was disturbing. My little sister really gets into her books sometimes. “I'll take your word on that.” “What about you?” Musette asked with a hopeful little smile. “I suppose the Guard doesn't leave much room for creativity, but some ponies do have a hidden artistic side that’s just waiting for the right chance to express itself.” “Um...” For a brief, irrational moment I was tempted to make up some sort of artistic interest just to impress her. Thankfully it was only a moment, or else I probably would’ve done something that made me look like a complete idiot. “Sorry, I’m not really much of an art guy. Not unless you count stuff like coming up with battle strategies or trying to find ways to make my unit run more efficiently. Honestly, the only time I get creative is during—” I quickly cut myself off, lest I say too much. I might not be an expert when it comes to charming mares, but even I knew that bringing up game night with the guys usually didn’t impress girls. Musette grinned, getting up from her couch and moving over to mine to gently nudge me in the side. “Oh come on, don’t be shy. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I’m sure that whatever you’re working on is amazing. So what are you? A musician? A singer? Perhaps a budding poet?” “Er, none of those actually...” I shuffled self-consciously, especially now that the pretty mare was sitting right next to me. “It’s ... honestly it’s just a game I play with some of the guys. You know, Mazes and Magi? It’s not really very ... artistic.” “Oh, I wouldn’t say that.” She smiled reassuringly, scooting a bit closer to me. “There’s quite a bit of art involved in the game. You have to create characters and a story just like a writer, and then act out the roles. It’s a collaborative storytelling and improvisational acting exercise.” “Really?” She made it sound a lot more impressive than it actually was. “I mean, we usually just eat a lot of pizza, drink a lot of soda, and pretend we’re killing a bunch of orcs and goblins.” “Art comes in many forms.” She tapped the side of the couch a few times. “Actually, I’ve been looking for a new group to play with. I lost track of my old Mazes and Magi group after I moved to Canterlot, and—” “You play Mazes and Magi?” Sure, I knew that there were girls who were into the game; I’d even managed to get Cadance and Twily to try it out once, though it hadn’t really worked out. Cadance kept trying to use diplomacy on all the bad guys, and Twilight had come up with the most horrifyingly overpowered character ever thanks to figuring out how to combine half a dozen loopholes I’d never noticed before. No amount of explaining that she really shouldn’t play that sort of character would sway her from her stubborn insistence that the character should be fine since everything she’d done was allowed by the book. Musette smiled and nodded. “I’m a huge fan of the game. A girl has to have a few hobbies. I don’t suppose your group has room for another player?” “I’ll have to ask them.” Not that the answer was in any doubt: I was pretty sure my buddies would kill me if they found out I’d turned down a chance to add a beautiful mare to our gaming group. “So, uh, what kind of characters do you like to play?” “Oh, it varies.” She shrugged. “You know how it goes—pick whatever fits in best with the rest of the group. If the group needs a spellcaster, I play a spellcaster. If they need a knight, I’ll play a knight. And so on.” She grinned. “I suppose it’s just like with Vinyl: I find the best way to fit and make things work for everypony.” She glanced down at her flank, which I’d been trying very hard not to pay too much attention to. Her cutie mark was a strange double flute thing that I didn’t recognize. “It’s ... well, that’s kind of my special talent. Finding a way to fit in and make things work better and help artists discover that special creative spark that they need.” A bit of a sheepish blush crept onto her cheeks. “That’s why I was bugging you so much about whether you were into anything artistic.” “Oh.” I chuckled and nodded understandingly. “I think I know exactly how you feel. It’s just like me and wanting to protect somepony.” “So that’s why you’re sticking around so hard.” Vinyl stepped out the kitchen, a large mug of coffee in one hoof. Apparently she hadn’t just been getting something to drink, because she’d also fixed her bed-mane and put on a pair of purple sunglasses. “Guess I should’ve figured that you’d be way too stubborn about protecting potential damsels in distress with a name like Shining Armor.” I chuckled and rubbed the back of my head. “Yeah, maybe a little. It’s just ... well, I'd feel pretty bad if you got hurt after my mom asked me to make sure you were safe.” Vinyl sighed and shook her head. “Still not wild about this, but I guess having my own personal bodyguard could be kinda cool. I mean, I still think everypony’s making a big deal over nothing, buuut I don't think Musette or Mom will let me drop it, so I guess I’ll just have to live with it.” Musette shot her a cheeky grin. “Yup, that’s pretty much how it is.” “I’ll try not to cause you too many problems,” I offered diplomatically. “I’m here to help you, not get in your way or mess with your personal or professional life. With any luck I can find this mare who’s bothering you tonight, talk to her, and get her to back off. Less than one day to sort it all out, and then you never have to see me again.” “Not unless we want to,” Musette chimed in, shooting me another one of those looks that bypassed my brain and went straight to my libido. Vinyl looked between the two of us and raised an eyebrow. “Well well well ... did Musette find out you're an artist?” I chuckled sheepishly, feeling just a little silly. “Er, not exactly...” Musette smirked and nudged me in the side. “Maybe not an artist in the traditional sense, but it’s close enough to count for me. Plus he seems like a pretty cool guy, and I could always use another friend. Don’t worry, Vinyl, I’ll still be around whenever you need somepony for your jam sessions.” “Better be.” She sipped her coffee, then grinned at me. “The name probably gave it away, but she’s pretty good at helping me get the music flowing. Guess it just helps to have somepony there to bounce ideas off of and get a second opinion from. You know how it is. Been that way ever since we hooked up a couple months back.” “You ... hooked up?” I was pretty sure she meant that in a non-romantic sense, given what Musette had said earlier, but I wanted to be sure. “Yeah, you know, became friends and all that,” Vinyl explained, much to my relief. “I was putting on a show, Musey found me once I was done and we started talking. We really hit it off, got to be buddies, and then she offered to move in when I needed a new roommate. It’s been working out pretty well so far.” She paused, then lowered her shades and smirked at me. “Even if she does stuff like snap up the cute guardponies who come here to protect me before I even get a shot at them.” “Um...” I struggled to think of something reasonably intelligent to say. I wasn’t used to having mares flirting with me, and certainly not two of them at once. I could already feel my cheeks heating up as my brain went to some very inappropriate places. “Um...” Vinyl snorted so hard she spilled a bit of her coffee on the carpet. “Chillax bro, I'm just messing with you. You’re not my type, and I don’t think our parents would approve.” “Er, right.” I let out a relieved sigh. Normally a stallion my age wouldn’t complain about having two pretty mares coming after him, but in this case it probably would’ve caused a bunch of messy complications I really didn’t need to deal with. “That's fine, really.” Vinyl snorted again, then finished off her coffee. “Y’know what? You're alright. Tell you what, you get this whole psycho fangirl thing sorted out for me and I’ll put you on my buddies list whenever I put on a show. Hook you up with some free tickets, a backstage pass—whatever you want.” She set her mug down on top of a bookcase, next to two other used coffee mugs that had clearly been there for a while. Upon noticing Musette’s disapproving scowl, Vinyl sighed and levitated all three of the dirty mugs to the kitchen. “At least she’s not bugging me about using a coaster this time.” “You really should do that.” Musette groused. “Yeah, yeah...” Vinyl rolled her eyes and shifted her attention to me. “Right, so are you gonna be in uniform at the show tonight?” “I was thinking I would be, as long as that’s not going to be an issue.” I might not be on official Guard business, but wearing a uniform would add a little extra weight to everything I did. Vinyl’s overenthusiastic fan would take me a lot more seriously if she knew I was in the Guard rather than just being some random stallion sticking my nose into her business. Plus if things got nasty, I would have a much easier time arresting the mare if I looked like a Guardpony. “Shouldn’t be a problem,” Vinyl assured me. “We usually get cadets from West Hoof more than actual guards, but you military types like a night out on the town as much as anypony.” She tapped her chin thoughtfully, then added, “Although if anyone asks, could you maybe try to say something like the Guard sent you because my last concert got so wild that they wanna make sure it doesn’t happen again? That'll play well.” “I’ll keep that in mind,” I answered dryly. I normally wasn’t the type to make up wild stories, but it seemed like a harmless little lie that might boost up Vinyl’s reputation a bit. Besides, after whatever happened with her yesterday, it would probably seem fairly plausible. “Don’t worry, I have plenty of experience getting into places while wearing my uniform.” Musette grinned at me. “Sounds like there’s an interesting story there...” I smiled back. “Well, maybe once all this business is taken care of, I’ll tell you all about it.” I couldn’t be sure when she was wearing sunglasses, but I suspect Vinyl was rolling her eyes. “Alright you two, break it up. I might as well start practicing for tonight’s show since I’m up. Musey, you know what to do. Shining ... well, I hope you like my music, ‘cause you’re gonna be listening to it for the next several hours.” “Sure thing.” She was a professional musician, so it was bound to be good.